All characters from The Vampire Diaries belong to L.J. Smith as well as all characters from Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer. I own nothing except my version of events.
Chapter 7 Shit's Getting Weird
On Sunday, I received a short text from Jacob saying he was full-on sick but not to worry.
On Monday, I texted him Good Morning and asked how he was feeling. I got no reply.
On Tuesday, it was much the same as Monday. I was beginning to get worried.
On Wednesday, it was much the same as Monday and Tuesday. Except now I was completely worried.
It was now Thursday, and I had made several calls with no replies. I texted him and left voicemails and still… nothing. I was more than worried and starting to get mad. I know he was sick and all but it's been days, if it's a simple flu he wouldn't be sick enough to not be able to pick up his damn phone and at least text me that he was alive.
I was now calling Billy's phone, knowing that at least he would tell me what was really going on.
On the third ring, Billy answered, making a half-hearted excuse about visiting his daughter at college and quickly hanging up on me after that. I knew it was a lie considering she barely calls them once a month. I guess I was wrong in thinking the adult currently involved in the situation now would tell me the truth.
Shit was getting weird.
I was contemplating my dilemma when I heard a knock at my front door. I wobbled my way to the door and opened it, "Embry?" He looked both angry and devastated all at once. "Are you ok? What's going on?"
"Can I come in?"
"Yeah sure." I widened the door and he stepped through walking straight to the couch, sitting down with his shoulders hunched over.
"What's wrong, Embry?... You're starting to worry me."
"I saw Quil."
Ok, I don't understand, if he saw Quil it's got to be a good thing right? But Embry didn't say another word.
Why won't this kid just spit it out already, I thought frustratingly. "Ok well what happened? Shouldn't you be happy your other half is back?" Those two dudes were inseparable, it was like they were twins.
"He didn't see me but I saw him... He was cliff diving with the La Push gang."
"La Push has a gang?" That's news to me. I've never seen them nor heard anything about them, this is my first time.
"Yeah, it's just a group of buff guys who walk around town like they own the place. I've never seen them do anything illegal but I've heard rumors. Has Jake said anything about Quil to you?"
"No, I haven't heard from Jacob since Sunday. I thought he was still sick but then I just got off the phone with Billy and he said they're both out of town."
"What? That can't be… Bella…" I heard Embry whisper.
I looked up to see him standing in front of me with a look of pure sadness on his face.
"…that's not the only person I saw with them." He finally said. I had a sinking suspicion that this was going to be bad… it's going to be really bad.
I was almost afraid to ask, "Who else did you see?"
He leaned down to grab both of my hands and started tugging me towards the couch, mumbling something about sitting down. I pulled my hands out of his and almost yelled, "Spit it out already!"
"Jacob was with them." He blurted.
Uh, what. I froze. I literally just got off the phone with Billy and he told me they were out of town. Why would he lie to me? Why couldn't he just tell me Jacob didn't want to talk to me? Why is Jacob even avoiding me? Is he ghosting me? I thought we were happy, he even said he loved me.
Wait… is that it? Is it because I haven't said it back?!
Embry was staring at me as I stood there motionless processing the information until he frowned even further, like he was thinking something really hard. "Why would Billy lie to you? I saw him yesterday leaving the Tribe's council building, and it was clearly Jacob and Quil on that cliff. I swear it was them."
This still doesn't make any sense. If they're not out of town then why would Billy cover for Jacob? If that asshole didn't want to be with me anymore then he should have just said so. I didn't know exactly what I was feeling, was I devastated or mad?
I think I was still in shock.
"Bella!" he shook my shoulders.
"Sorry, I'm just really confused and trying to figure it all out."
I finally decided to listen to Embry and sit down on the couch, Embry following after me. We both sat there for who knows how long looking off into space. Until I heard Embry clear his throat making me turn to look at him and found him with a look of pure worry on his face.
"You and Jacob are still together…. right?"
Fuck, I thought we were but who knows at this fucking point!
"Well I fucking thought so but apparently not. He decided to break up with me and forgot to tell me."
"That doesn't make any sense, that guy is head over heels in love with you Bella. He's a great guy. He wouldn't do that to you." I don't know if he was trying to encourage me or give me false hope but either way I didn't need or want it. If Jacob didn't want me then fine, fuck that guy.
Ok, so I guess I was mad then.
"Fuck him Embry, if he doesn't want to be with me anymore that's fine. He should've grown some balls and let me be in the know but he chose not to. It shows how little he cares for me…" I looked up at him, "and you for that matter, since I'm assuming he hasn't talked to you either. Fuck him and fuck Quil too, it's not like you don't have any other friends. You still have me; I wasn't kidding when I said that to you the night of the bonfire. You're still my friend and we can hang out without them." I reached over and gave him a hug. I know I was extremely hurt but I wasn't ready to face the pain yet. After what happened with Edward, I never thought I would be going through the same thing again. I'm starting to feel like I need to give up on love altogether. What's the point when they end up leaving whenever they grow tired of me?
We stayed quiet for a long time, until Embry decided to break the silence. "Bella?" Embry whispered into my ear.
I whispered back, "Yes?"
"Can we make cookies? It would make me feel so much better."
I laughed sadly, "Sure, you can even stay for dinner if you'd like."
"Cool, I love your cooking. It's the best I've ever eaten... Oh wait! Don't tell my mom that!"
So for the rest of the evening we spent it making cookies. We made enough to snack on, for dessert, and for Embry to take home. It was nice, I don't think I've ever really spent any quality time alone with Embry before. He was always friendly to me and joked around with Jacob and Quil but he was the calmer one of the three. He just gave off these peaceful, comforting vibes. He was so kind and sweet, and incredibly loyal too. We tried not to bring up Jacob or Quil much in our conversations but it was hard not to when his stories involved either one or both of them. I didn't want to care whether Jacob decided to contact me or not, I was stubborn enough to pull it off. Embry was different though, his loyalty prevented him from giving up on their friendship. He still had hope, I could tell. Then again, I think if it were Caroline, Jeremy or Angela who did that to me I wouldn't give up on them either.
When Charlie arrived I saw the look of confusion on his face when he saw Embry in place of Jacob. He raised an eyebrow at me, not voicing his concern after I mouthed the word "Later" to placate him. Once Embry left, though, the interrogation began.
"What's going on Bella?"
"I honestly don't even know dad…" I admitted and proceeded to tell him everything that's been going on and what happened today.
"I'll call Billy and see what the problem is." he said gruffly, leaning back to get his phone out of his pocket.
"No dad! Please don't!" I yelled in a panic. I love sharing things with my dad but I can't have him fighting my battles for me.
"Bella…" he started but I cut him off shaking my head.
"No dad, please don't get involved. You can't go around threatening all these boys just because they dumped me. Things happen and it just didn't work out, ok? Jacob could have handled the situation better but he didn't. He is a 17-year-old boy after all… I heard men don't mature until their 40's." My attempt at a joke worked, he slightly smiled shaking his head.
"Fine, you are right. I can't threaten them all but you can't blame me for wanting to. You deserve more than all of these yahoo's, you have a lot to offer and any boy would be lucky enough to be with you."
I smiled, "Agreed, unfortunately they're all idiots so it'll be a while. Besides who knows, Jacob might actually have a good enough reason for what's happening. Though I'm not holding my breath. Anyways, I'm gonna go get ready for bed. I'll see you in the morning." I got up and leaned down to give him a hug. "I love you dad, thanks for being there for me."
Hugging me back he replied, "Always baby girl, you're my daughter and I love you more than you can imagine." I released him, kissed him on his cheek and made my way to my room. Thank god I got him to put his gun away, that man would literally kill anyone for me. Honestly, it was the best feeling in the world knowing my dad had my back no matter what. I still hadn't heard from my mom but I rarely thought about her these days. Not that it mattered, I had my dad and he was the only parental figure I needed.
As I was getting ready for bed, my head was spinning, I wasn't going to be able to fall asleep. Maybe I need to talk it out some more… and I knew just the person to call. I looked at the time and realized it was kind of late, so I decided to text first to make sure she was awake.
Hey, you awake?
She answered in less than a minute.
Caroline: Yeah, what's up?
I've gotten some troubling information and I need a sounding board before I lose it.
Not even 10 seconds passed when I felt my phone vibrate with an incoming call.
"Ok Belly, what's happening? Have you heard from Jacob?" I heard her voice coming through the receiver, I have been updating her practically every day on the Jacob MIA situation.
"Not from Jacob but from Embry…" and I told her what he said, including my previous conversation with Billy.
"Damn girl I don't even know what to say. It all sounds weird and confusing. Have you tried calling Jacob after Embry left?"
"No and I'm not going to. That asshole is ghosting me. If he doesn't want to talk to me then I'm fine with it. I'm not gonna beg."
I heard her 'hmmm' through the phone, "I think there's something else going on... nothing makes sense. Jacob has loved you since you were practically kids, he worships the ground you walk on. There's no way he would do that to you."
"Yeah that's what Embry said but his actions speak louder than words."
"No Belly don't give up yet, he's not just your boyfriend he's also one of your best friends. Don't get mad at him until you hear what's really going on. You tend to get mad first, then you spiral, becoming more irrational by the second and you always end up making yourself feel worse. Wait until the weekend and go see him, I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation for this."
"I don't want to," I pouted. "It feels like begging."
"Shut up, it's not begging," I practically heard her eye roll as she said it, "It's simply trying to get answers, it's not fair to you to be left in limbo. Don't let your anger and stubbornness get in the way, catch him at home and get some answers."
"Ugh fine, I'll see him on Saturday but I'm not happy about this."
"Of course not, but it's the smart thing to do and you know it."
I huffed, I knew she was right but that didn't make me hate the idea any less. "Thanks Care, … I miss you. I'm still upset I didn't get to visit you this summer."
"Yeah me too but stuff was kind of hectic here this summer and I wouldn't have had the time to dedicate all my attention to you."
"You mean because of Elena's crap?... I don't know where you find the patience to deal with her shit all the time. Just because you've been friends with someone since you were kids doesn't mean you have to continue to be friends. When they become unhealthy relationships it's better to remove them from your life."
She laughed "Ok Dr. Phil,… it's not as easy as you make it sound. It's… complicated."
I rolled my eyes, "Why? Because you're scared that if you break your friendship with Elena everyone in the middle will take her side?"
"No… not really" she said as she sighed into the phone, "but I do care about her. She can be difficult but she's caring... Anyway, you're just biased because you don't like her."
"Of course not, she's manipulative and she plays the victim all the time. She's not a damsel in distress trapped in a tower. She just needs to grow the fuck up, get her shit together and think before she acts and you and the rest of your friends need to stop playing captain save a hoe. Even Jeremy has given up on her and that's his sister." I will never understand how everyone falls for her crap. She's been doing it since we were kids, dragging everyone along with her shit. She never accepts her faults and manipulates everyone into thinking she's this sweet innocent little girl, when she's anything but. Needless to say, she annoys me to death. Now with her love triangle, which I know for sure she's the one leading on her boyfriend's older brother, she's probably milking it for all its worth. She just looooves the attention. Cue eye roll.
"Yeah yeah yeah, I swear you are both sworn enemies since you met and it's kind of funny. You know she says you're just jealous of her."
I snorted, "Yeah right, she wishes I were…" That bitch would never say it to my face though. "Anyways, we totally got sidetracked and I know you don't like it when I talk about Elena so I'll drop it now, but I do miss you and Jeremy."
"Yeah, we miss you too. Maybe I'll see you next summer. Look Belly, I gotta go to bed. I'm sure things will work out soon but keep me updated in the meantime. Love you Belly."
"I will. Love you too, Care Bear." I heard a beep signaling the call ended.
I lied down and settled into my covers. Stupid Jacob, Quil and now Elena too. I was really hoping there was a reasonable explanation for Jacob pulling a disappearing act on me but as I kept thinking I couldn't find anything. I mean, he was completely ignoring me going so far as to getting his own dad to lie to me. It was so pathetic. I have terrible luck with boys, maybe I should wait till I move to college to start dating again. Clearly Forks holds all the runaway boyfriends, either that or it's me.
I snorted… yeah right! I'm fucking awesome. I wouldn't let two failed relationships lower my self-esteem. They're the ones who have the problem, not me. Especially Edward, that fucker was an undead-forever-stuck-at-seventeen idiot. That's a cluster fuck all on its own.
Shit, I am not going down that black hole tonight. I'd rather redirect my thoughts back to Elena, that self-centered manipulative bitch. She is annoying and I don't like her. How nobody sees through her other than me and Jeremy boggles the mind. I've never liked her since we met. We've learned how to ignore each other's presence when we're around everyone else. Well mostly me, I try to be the bigger person and ignore her snide remarks. It's usually summertime when I visited and there's no point in adding extra drama when summer was made to have fun. I'm not gonna lie though and say we didn't fight too, there's only so much a person can take. Which is why I would mostly hang out with Care and Jer, sometimes even Tyler and Bonnie. As we grew up, Tyler would hang out with us more. When my grandmother Swan was alive, we would visit every summer but when she passed away it wasn't the same. We still tried to go but it was usually every other summer and we didn't stay as long as we used to. As we got older though Tyler would hang out with us more. At first we all thought he had a crush on me but one day he showed up at Care's house, ranting about Elena always wanting attention, especially from Matt. Then we understood, Matt and Tyler were best friends but puberty hit and Matt gravitated towards Elena more and more. At that time, Tyler wasn't into girls yet. Now though, I've heard that guy is a big ladies' man, which I completely believe because the last time I saw him he was getting taller and even I could tell he was attractive. Him and I always got along but we didn't really stay in touch that much, once in a while he would text me or I would text him and we'd chat for a bit but I wouldn't consider him and I as being close. Definitely not as close as Jeremy and me, or Caroline and I. Bonnie and I talked even less, if she was around Caroline while we were on the phone she'd pop in and say hi, ask me how I am and vice versa. Once we were done with the pleasantries, she'd give the phone back to Care and that was basically it. I didn't mind so much, she was kind of stuck up, thinking she knew more than the rest of us but at least she wasn't annoying. I liked her well enough but I wouldn't consider us friends…
My brain was not turning off and I hate when that happens. I was trying to go to sleep but some random thing would pop into my head and I would spiral into a vicious cycle, circulating the same thoughts over and over again. It was already one in the morning and I had school later today. So I put my earbuds on and played some classical music to relax my mind enough to fall asleep. I set a sleep timer so it would shut off on its own and tried to relax each body part one at a time hoping to continue to relax myself. Eventually it started working and I welcomed sleep to take me away from the real world.
The weekend came and went. Still, I did nothing.
Instead, I went out with my friends and pretended like everything was fine. I got a few questioning looks but Embry had suddenly become my savior, swooping in and covering up for Jacob's absence. I was grateful, he had his own emotional turmoil going on but he had the loyalty to stick by my side and support me through it all. Caroline tried to convince me to go see Jake like I said I would but I wasn't ready. To be completely honest, ... I was really hurt. I thought Jacob would be different and up until now he had been completely different to Edward. Jacob was like my sun, he was light and fun. He was attentive, caring, compassionate; he always asked for my opinion and cared about the things I had to say. He was my boyfriend and my best friend all rolled into one. Our transition from friends to a relationship was effortless. So much so that it felt like I had been with him since forever, when in reality it had only been a couple of months. It was insane; there was without a doubt no comparison between Edward and Jacob because they were the complete opposite. Which is why I was so confused and hurt by what he was currently doing. Secretly I was hoping everyone was right, that he must have a serious explanation for why he seemed to have disappeared from my life but like I said earlier, he was my best friend, whatever he was going through I would've hoped he knew that I'd always be there for him no matter what. I was more than upset but I didn't want to face my emotions, it would hurt too much to do so. Which is why I was scared to see him, afraid that he wouldn't have a good enough reason for his actions… or even worse that he wouldn't even want to talk to me… or care. That would destroy the little part of me that had started falling in love with him.
Yeah, that's right.
I never thought I would again, especially after the whole Cullens thing. I had told myself to be careful, not let my guard down and protect my heart from those who could potentially hurt me. Somehow along the way it was no longer a concern, I trusted him. He promised he would never intentionally hurt me... so what the fuck was he doing now? I hate admitting that I'm too scared to see him, that I'm too hurt to have hope that things will just go back to normal. Even if he had a good excuse I don't know if I could ever trust him again. Either way I wasn't ready to see him and I also wasn't ready to admit my hurt, so instead, I hid it behind my anger. It was pretty easy to do too, Jacob made it so, it was also my failsafe way to protect myself from further pain. It was easier to do that than to face my current situation. Having a love life is waaaay too much work, if this thing with Jacob doesn't work out I'll take a break from it. It gets too complicated and I should focus my energy on getting good grades and going off to college next year.
That alone was another topic of worry, I haven't figured out what I will study and where. I will be turning 18 in a month and I should start thinking about the future. In the back of my mind I always figured I would end up in Mystic Falls, I liked being there. Care and I used to say that's where we'd go to college, though I haven't talked to her about it much in the past couple of years. Either she had forgotten about it or she's hoping to get out of Mystic Falls, which on second thought wouldn't be sucha bad thing for her. Caroline's spirit is bright, too bright to belong in Mystic Falls for the rest of her life. After this whole Jacob thing is resolved maybe I can broach the subject again.
One worry at a time Bella!
Once I start thinking about Jacob my mind spirals into complete chaos. I don't even understand how that happens. Jacob's school started this week, I wonder if he's actually going or being a bum in the La Push gang. I shouldn't be judging the gang because I don't even know them, but also, you don't get named 'The La Push Gang' for no reason. There must be somethi…
"Bella!"
I jumped in my seat and looked at the disrupting source. Tyler was standing next to his chair with his backpack slung over his shoulder.
"You planning on staring off into space during lunch too?" He raised an eyebrow at me, "Seriously, what is up with you this week?"
Shit, I was so trapped in my mind during most of class that I missed more than half of my notes. Ugh I hope Tyler did better than I.
I got up and started gathering my things, "I'm fine, sorry. I don't know. I guess I've had a weird week." I flung my backpack over my shoulder and began following Tyler to lunch.
He looked at me and frowned. "You know, I might be a guy and daft most of the time, but even I know that when a woman says 'I'm fine'... they're really not 'fine'."
I sighed, not even bothering to prove him wrong. "Ok I'm not fine right now but I will be eventually." I looked to the ground. Fuck, I hope I will be fine eventually. Stupid Jacob.
"You know you can tell me anything, right? I know I kid most of the time but I'd like to think I'm also a good listener too." He gave me a shy smile.
My smile automatically appeared; my friends are the best. "Thanks Tyler I'll keep that in mind but for now, can I just get a comforting hug?" I tugged on his arm and pulled him towards me, wrapping my arms around his mid-waist.
I could tell he was surprised by the request and my quick movements, but he hugged me back anyways. Everyone knew I wasn't much of a hugger so I'm sure he didn't see this coming. "Cool, cuz I'm a good hugger too. I'm available for hugs anytime." he said, chuckling.
I released him and began walking again. "Thanks man, now let's get to lunch before the food runs out."
"Hell yeah! I'm starving, and Friday is Nacho Day. I love Nachos." smiling as he said this.
We both grabbed our lunches and sat with everyone else. They were already chatting away, laughing at something Mike had said. Angie looked at me and frowned.
"Still nothing from Jacob?" Angie whispered. I had finally told Angela over the weekend what was going on. She was keeping me and Embry company as we all hung out at my house, keeping it low-key. I told her I didn't want anyone else to know until I found out whether we were broken up or not. She was very understanding, knowing I wasn't a fan of sharing my issues with everyone. Jacob is a particularly sensitive topic, I only trusted Angie completely. I knew she would never judge me and I was right, she gave me her unyielding love and support.
"No," I sighed. "He's still being an idiot."
She patted my arm and said, "I'm sure he'll contact you soon, he loves you and he must be going through something really tough to completely ignore you like this."
"I really want to believe that but every day that passes is another blow to the heart. And to be honest, I don't even know if I want him back or not. Maybe I should just stay alone forever," I pouted as I stabbed my food with a fork, moving it around the plate.
Angie simply chuckled at me. "Oh Bella, don't be so dramatic. Everything will work out, I'm positive."
"Well at least one of us is." I huffed. I tried my hardest to blend into the table's conversation after that. I'm pretty good at acting like everything's alright. It's only people who truly know me who can see when things might not be so great for me. I was surprised Tyler noticed too. He wasn't much of an observer, I must be dropping the ball then, can't let that happen again.
I was able to act like myself for the rest of the day, thank god it was the weekend and I could go straight home and wallow in my own misery but as I pulled my truck into my driveway, I realized there was someone waiting for me at the door. That someone rushed over to me and pulled me out of the car to place me down onto the floor. I looked up and frowned.
"What's wrong? What happened?" I questioned as I watched Embry breaking from the seams.
"I finally talked to them today." Embry said, looking down into the ground.
"What did they say?" I worried my bottom lip in between my teeth. If Embry looked so sad, it must not have been anything good.
"They said they couldn't be my friend anymore and to stop bugging them. They looked so angry at me." He admitted. It was as if I could almost feel his pain as he spoke.
Oh hell no, they did not just diss their best friend like he was a piece of trash. He could ignore me all he wanted, at this point I didn't care as much or at least I made myself think that. But for them to say those mean things to someone who was like their brother that I would not stand for.
"Are they fucking kidding me?! Nope, not gonna happen. They can't say those things to you Embry, I won't allow it. You three have all been friends since kids and just because they're in a gang now they think they can treat people like shit?!..." Yeah the fuck right! He must have forgotten who he was dealing with. "Get in the car." I commanded.
He looked up at me surprised, "What?"
I climbed back into my truck and leaned over to unlock the door, "I said get in."
Embry continued to look surprised... with a hint of confusion mixed in but followed my order nevertheless and climbed into the truck. I reversed my car out of the driveway and made my way to La Push. I might not be ready to confront Jacob about our relationship but there was absolutely no way in hell he was going to treat Embry this way and think he can get away with it. Not while I'm around!
"They can't treat you like that Embry. I don't care whether Jacob and I are together or not. As long as I exist in this world, he will NOT be acting like you mean nothing to him. He'd be lucky to have a friend like you. In fact, him and Quil are the ones who don't deserve you!" I tried not to yell but my anger was getting the best of me and I knew my voice was rising as I ranted. Jacob thought he could treat Embry like this because he knew Embry was too quiet to say anything back. Well if Embry couldn't use his voice to stand up for himself, then I would. And there was no fucking way Jacob was going to get out of this without hearing from me.