Gamble

Lalli's first opportunity to interact with Emil with friendly intentions came earlier than he initially thought it would. It turned to be the first time Lalli was in town for a raffle that was held by the general store once a year. When it came to tickets, things were fairly simple: each was a price that was affordable to most people, and a free one could be given away for every five actually purchased. Some people took the extra ticket, others asked the seller to keep it for poor households that otherwise wouldn't be able to afford a ticket for every single member who wanted one. Lalli initially hadn't intended to have any part in selling the tickets, but Leif had turned out to have been doing so alongside running a fever that Göte had declared not bad enough to keep him from working. Mikkel happened to want a ticket, but his prime priority upon seeing Leif's face up close had become getting the young man in a bed. The only way to get him to actually rest had been to promise that the ticket booklet he had brought with him would be much emptier after his nap. Ensuring this had fallen on the member of the household that didn't have anything more urgent to do for the rest of the day. Lalli's first stop was the Solberg's household, where servants were allowed to take turns in having a brief break to buy tickets if they wished. While Lalli didn't bother asking Emil after what the old man had told him, the children all wanted a chance at getting a prize. Emil's reluctance to gamble turned out to not extend to imposing the same on others, resulting in him purchasing a ticket for each of the children. While storing money in the pouch that also kept the unclaimed free tickets, Lalli got an idea. He took one out, scribbled Emil's name on it and gave it to him:
-Here. It will be less bad if you don't win anything if you don't pay for it.
-Nice try, but it's still a raffle ticket and raffles are among the things I'd rather avoid.
Lalli had been aware his idea could fail to an extent, but he now saw what a dumb idea it had been to write Emil's name on the ticket before knowing whether it would be accepted or not. Helena, who happened to be in the room, reached out her hand:
-I'll take it, in that case. If he had gotten himself one and changed his mind, nobody would be surprised that he gave it to me.
Lalli gladly gave Helena the ticket and left.

As he went around the rest of the town, some people were reluctant to give Göte more money than they needed to in order to keep their household and sometimes business running. Others seemed to be getting at least one ticket as some sort of yearly tradition, and it seemed to be the only form of paid entertainment some households partook in. He also discovered that at least one of the store's other employees was selling raffle tickets. The other ticket seller told Lalli that selling all the tickets usually required visiting some of the nearby villages, which other villages Leif usually went to, and suggested that he avoid those not on Leif's usual route, as some were lacking in "welcoming" people. Lalli understood what he meant when some people, even in the two villages he visited, seemed to either immediately assume he was interested in men because he was coming instead of Leif or assume he wasn't because of the mere fact that he wasn't Leif. He didn't manage to sell the entire booklet and the only way Leif felt safe rewarding him with a minimal risk of being taken to task by Göte was to let him keep the free tickets that were still in the pouch. Mikkel refused to let Leif return to the store alone and went there with him.

xxxx

The announcement of the raffle winners had, for some reason, become an excuse for a small social gathering and feast in the main street. Lalli noticed Emil had his ticket with him, but seemed to be keeping it hidden from others. It looked like it was best to let Emil and his cousins enjoy the occasion. While Emil didn't win anything, one of the children got a deck of cards. One of Lalli's free tickets, meanwhile, won him a chess set in which the pieces were in a carved box that opened up in a way that allowed the top and bottom to become a thick board kept just a little off the table by the hinges alongside cleverly shaped and placed clasps. From the engraved and painted box alone, it was clear that it was an expensive set. This was confirmed when the pieces turned out to be a mix of human-shaped and troll-shaped figurines, each species being the equivalent of one of the colors in less elaborate sets. Just as he was processing that fact, Helena came to him and asked to have a look at the chess set out of everyone else's sight. As soon as they found an isolated bench that would hold both of them alongside the chess board, Helena put the box next to her, opened it and made a face that Lalli could guess to be a mostly negative emotion:
-They pawned it… I knew it.
Lalli hadn't heard one of her words before:
-Pawned?
-One of the general store's side trades. It's a little like selling something to get money quickly, except that the store agrees to keep the item for some time to give you a chance of buying it back. Paying part of the money back can get the item kept for longer than if no money had been paid at all, and any item left for too long is put up for sale to anyone who will buy it, original owner or not. Göte sometimes uses nicer items that he's had for a long time as raffle prizes. When Emil was about to turn thirteen, I happened to be on a trip in a place known for its woodworking. I decided to send him one of the nicer chess sets as a birthday gift. When I got home, his parents claimed to have never gotten it and suggested it had been lost in transit. Within a couple months of my return, the bad state of their financial situation came into the open and part of me started wondering if they had actually gotten it, but sold it before Emil ever saw it. By the time that idea felt real enough to start bothering me, the right time, place and person to ask never overlapped, then Emil's parents died. After that, I couldn't bring myself to do something that would make the stain on their memory bigger than it already was… sorry, I've never shared this before, so it looks like I'm just telling everything to the first person I'm talking to about it.
Lalli hadn't seen that coming, and after thinking a while, only one question managed to form itself in his mind:
-Do you… not want Emil to know about this?
Helena nodded, then let out a sigh:
-Now is probably a strange moment to ask, but what was with that free ticket? Up to a few days ago, you seemed bent on interacting with him as little as you could manage, but at that moment, it looked like you were aware of his thing about gambling and trying to do something about it.
-I was… a little.
-May I ask why?
Lalli thought a little. He remembered how he had felt that Onni and Tuuri's respective engagements had come out of nowhere. Helena seemed to act like family towards Emil the few times he had met her and he was intending to court Emil, at least temporarily.
-It's becoming harder and harder to avoid him because part of me keeps thinking that maybe if I knew him better, I would like him better. I'm thinking that the only way to stop thinking that is to spend more time with him. Since he's technically a partner option, I'm thinking I could see what it's like to court him at the same time. Like that, if I try to avoid him again, but wonder if I'm sure, I'll be able to answer "yes".
Helena sighed again:
-So I'm keeping this secret from him, and you want to court him to confirm that the two of you wouldn't get along as partners. I have an idea: you say nothing about the chessboard, and I say nothing about your real reasons for courting him if the two of you manage to start something. By the way, I'm not going to get in your way. If you turn out to be right about how well the two of you would get along as partners, Emil also may only be able to accept it after truly spending some time with you. Do you have any conditions you want to add?
Lalli didn't need to think too long about that one:
-Yes. If one of us really needs to share what they know with someone, they need to tell the other as soon as possible. If it can't be before, then after, as soon as they can.
-Fair enough. It's a really nice set. You should take it back to your house to avoid it getting damaged during the feast.
It was Lalli's turn to let out a sigh. For the price of a secret he hadn't expected to have to keep just a few minutes ago, he had an excuse to leave the party early.

By the time he got home, Lalli was already having second thoughts about the promise Helena had made to each other. For that reason, he went directly to Mikkel and told him everything. Mikkel's response gave him a little relief:
-Do not worry, many more people have arrangements similar to this one between them than you seem to think. The extra condition you added was a good catch for something that came so suddenly. I, myself, will not tell Emil unless I absolutely need to. However, there is something I would like to make sure of, since you are aiming to date Emil for some time: in what circumstances do you think you may end up telling him about his parents pawning a gift intended for him?
-I don't know, I just wanted to have the option if I needed it. Is there a problem I don't see?
-His feelings about his parents have grown into something quite complicated over the years. Part of it is due to the fact that they had moments of choosing their investments over his well-being that he is perfectly aware of. If you tell him about the pawned chess set under the wrong circumstances, you will be genuinely hurting him much more than he ever hurt you.
Lalli remembered times where Roni had used past incidents he had been told about to make Onni, Tuuri, Cecilia or Reynir look like worse people than they actually were. He saw how someone like him could potentially use what had happened with the chess set in the same way. He suddenly realized something:
-I should probably put it away where he won't see it if he comes to my room.
-It might be an idea, but remember the whole town knows you won something at the raffle and those who missed it was a nice chess set will find out soon enough. If the two of you end up stuck here because of weather or a late hour, he will know there is at least one game in the house.
-I will… find something else for us to do.
-How close is your idea to Roni's usual means of distracting you from things he didn't want you to see or notice?
Lalli felt stupid for not thinking of this. He didn't feel like tricking Emil in such a way, whether he was as he suspected or not. Besides, if he engaged in that specific activity while not in the mood just to distract the other person, he would not be able to truly get involved in it. Mikkel spoke again:
-While you were letting me examine the board, I noticed Helena got the inside of the box engraved with a birthday message for Emil. This is probably how she was able to make really sure it was her present. If you agree with Helena that he shouldn't be made aware that this set was once intended for him, the engraving can be hidden without being damaged with plenty of common materials. I can even do it for you now, if you wish. My next question is what you intend to do about the children. Other members of the household are watching them for part of the day, but with the understanding that Emil is in charge of their whereabouts for every bit of free time he has while they are not at school.
Lalli had thought of that aspect, fortunately:
-How sincere was a supposed to be when I said the kids could come here to play with Juha and Anne-Mari sometime?

xxxx

Fortunately, it had been a nice day outside when Emil had taken his cousins to play with Juha and Anne-Mari, which had allowed Lalli to take him to one of the garden's nicer places to talk:
-I'm honestly a little interested in you as a partner as well, but the more I try to find reasons other than the fact that you live here for that, the less I'm able to deny that it's a bigger factor than I'd like it to be. Actually, that time you found Sigrun talking about your family to me, I was trying to make up for not having been paying much attention to your family before that party at the Solbergs during which I gave you the cake. I had no idea that trying to find out about them would give you the wrong idea.
Lalli thought it was the right time to tell him Emil was already aware of a few of the tricks he was potentially planning to use:
-The man I was dating before Stefan also tried to know my family better. Tuuri said it must mean he really likes me. But he used what he knew to try to make me stop liking my family.
-Who were you dating, Göte?
-Someone like him, but our age. His family has a lot money, probably like yours before.
-If his upbringing was anything close to mine and his family never lost the money, I can see why you broke up with him. I can't promise I'll be much better than him, but some of those habits simply fade away when one can no longer afford to have them, so I hope I'll be at least a little more bearable. For starters, I'd still like to make sure I don't have your family members mixed up. Do you mind reminding me who Tuuri is in regards to you and the children?
-My cousin on my father's side, Anne-Mari's mother, Juha's aunt on his father's side. Both children have the most seen set of parents.
-That will be it for today family-wise. Is there anything you like doing for fun?
-Hunting for food and listening to Stefan's stories. I tried baking a few times recently.
-That last one isn't a bad idea. I would probably try it if most of the food I get wasn't already prepared or cooked. Though I've seen some people get surprisingly creative with what we are given.
Fortunately, that was a topic that sparked Lalli's interest:
-Do you remember how they did it? We sometimes get food like that during jobs.
-To tell you the truth, I didn't really pay attention to what they were doing, I just got impressed with the end result. I'm not even sure I know the right words to use to describe it. I've also neither hunted nor am interested in it, so I can't contribute much to that topic, either. I'd try dead parents, but I'm guessing losing them at eight years old in the circumstances you did according to Sigrun doesn't have much in common with losing them at fourteen and still living in my hometown. Oh, I know. You were cared for by some not that much older than you who got the job without much warning, right? Do you have any advice that could help things go more smoothy with the children?
The topic turned out to contain a surprising number of things that Lalli had long wished to be able to tell someone who showed any willingness to listen.