That night Clay lay in bed staring into the dark and holding Emma in his arms. Neither of them slept. Someone called from the doctor's office earlier to give Emma her appointment time on Tuesday morning. He expected the weekend and Monday to be an endurance test for them both.

Emma's voice whispered in the quiet of their bedroom. "What if I need to have a mastectomy? Then I wouldn't be able to feed our babies. If I could even have babies anymore. I probably won't be able to after treatment."

He felt her heart racing as she worked herself into a panic. "Shh, you don't know any of those things will happen." Slowly, he began stroking her hair.

"Oh God, you shouldn't marry me. You should marry someone who can have kids."

"What?" Horrified, he tightened his arms around her. "Em, don't say that. You're getting way ahead of yourself here. We don't know this is breast cancer. I know you're scared. I'm scared too, but we can't make ourselves crazy thinking of the things that might happen." He began caressing her hair again, hoping his words would sink in. "And I asked you to marry me because I love you, not because I wanted a baby maker. If, and I mean if you couldn't get pregnant, we'd find some other way to have kids. But you are my family, alright?"

Emma sniffled quietly. "I guess."

"There's no guess about it." Rolling on his side to face her, he tried to distinguish Emma's features in the dim light. "I love you."

"I love you too." She cuddled close, nestling against his chest.

Hoping his words were of comfort to her, he rubbed her back. As they lay in the silence, Clay worried over Emma's declaration that he should marry someone else. As if he wanted to marry anyone else. By his reckoning, he was lucky she wanted to marry him. He knew she could have stayed in New York City after Tisch to pursue a performing career, but instead she found another avenue into music and came home to him.

Still, even knowing she had made the choice to be with him, when he started to plan his marriage proposal he worried about her answer. He remembered the expression of surprise on Jason's face when he realized Clay thought there was a possibility Emma would say no.

Clay had gone to Jason for his permission. He asked his former team leader to meet at the Bulkhead for drinks, saying he wanted to catch up as they didn't spend as much time together since Jason's retirement from the Navy over the winter.

Arriving early, Clay had found a seat at the bar and ordered a beer. When Jason entered the bar, Clay waved him over. "Hey, glad you could make it."

"Me too. Business has been picking up." Jason settled on a stool and signaled to the bartender. "When are the other guys coming?"

Clay shifted on his bar stool. "Uh, well, they might be by later, but I wanted to talk to you alone first."

Raising an eyebrow at Clay, Jason turned to give the bartender his order. Once his beer arrived, Jason gave Clay his full attention. "What's up?"

"Yeah, um, I wanted to ask you… you say business is picking up? What have you been doing?" Clay had hoped to ease into the conversation, not dive right in asking for permission.

"I'm working on security for a research and development facility for a new corporate client. But that's not why you wanted to talk to me, is it?" Rotating on his stool, Jason faced Clay with a knowing grin.

"Well, no, but I feel like we rarely talk lately with you not on base anymore." Clay's gaze dropped to his beer bottle on the bar. "I saw you in New York for Emma's graduation, but we were all focused on her big moment then."

A smile crossed Jason's face when Clay mentioned their celebrations of his daughter's recent accomplishment. "True, but I still don't think you're that interested in my business." Jason took a sip of his beer. "Unless you're looking for a job?"

"No, no, I'm not ready to leave the teams yet." Clay had hesitated at that point, but decided, like when he asked for Jason's okay to date Emma, he would be better off just saying it. "I'd like your permission to ask Emma to marry me."

Grinning, Jason pointed at Clay. "I knew it! Ray had you down as waiting until Christmas, but I told him you wouldn't make it until the Fourth of July."

"Wait, you all bet on when I'd ask?"

"No, no, I can't speak for the other guys. This was a conversation between me and Ray." Chuckling, Jason took a long gulp from his beer.

"So?" Clay prompted Jason for an answer.

Jason smirked. "Is Emma aware you're asking me?"

Clay took the last swallow from his beer and sighed. "No, she doesn't know I'm planning on proposing yet. I mean, we've discussed marriage vaguely, but I want to surprise her with the proposal."

"She'll kill you if she finds out." Jason shook his head. "The whole asking for my permission to date her thing still gets her pissed."

"She might, but this seemed like the right thing to do." Clay shrugged. "Besides I want you to be fine with me asking Emma to marry me."

"Of course, I'm fine with it. I had my doubts when you two started dating, but in the time you've been together it's become obvious to me how much you love Emma, and how much you support her." Jason set his beer bottle back on the bar with a click. "And how much Emma loves you."

At Jason's words, Clay smiled down at his empty beer. "Then you think I have a good shot at her saying yes?" He looked back to Jason to gauge his opinion.

Jason's eyes widened and both his eyebrows shot up. "You think she might say no?"

"Maybe." Clay realized there was a whole world out there for Emma. She didn't need to stay with him.

Reaching over, Jason caught Clay's shoulder and gave him a shake. "Kid, my daughter is in love you."

"I know, but she has so many other options." Clay shrugged. "She won't have as many if she commits herself to me."

Jason exhaled deeply and studied Clay. "First of all, she already committed herself to you when she came back to VA Beach. Getting engaged will just make things official." Pausing, Jason waited to see if his words were sinking in. "Second, when you start a relationship with someone, you're making a choice that eliminates other possibilities. That's life."

Clay nodded. He knew what Jason said was true, but he still worried about his job limiting Emma's future.

Taking another sip of his drink, Jason watched Clay pick at the label on his bottle of beer. "Clay, I spent a lot of time feeling guilty about what I thought was my career ruining Alana's life. But I've come to realize that while there were things I should have done different, things that would have made our marriage, our family, better, the responsibility wasn't all mine. Alana made her choices too." Jason studied Clay for a moment. "Emma will do the same."

"I know you're right, but maybe if it weren't for me, she would have stayed in New York and ten years from now she'd be performing professionally on stage."

"Possibly, but ten years from now she could also still be auditioning and waiting for her big break while she waitresses on the side to afford some rat hole of an apartment." Jason shook his head. "No one can predict the future. You think me and Alana ever thought she would be the one to die first, before our kids graduated from high school?"

Lying in bed, Clay realized how prescient Jason's words that night had been. Who would have imagined Alana would die on her way to the grocery store while Jason survived multiple deployments to war zones? What if Emma had stayed in New York after NYU? She'd be on her own dealing with this. Or, maybe she wouldn't have found the lump until things had become much more serious. With these troubling thoughts swirling around in Clay's head, sleep eluded him for most of the night.