Emily:

I was sitting in the back seat of my parents' dark blue Ford Explorer watching the waves lap against the shoreline, going over the last 24 hours in my mind and trying to decide how to handle it. We were parked at a small convenience store on our way out of town and both of them had gone inside to retrieve our typical car ride victuals.

I jolted when someone softly rapped their knuckles on the window I was leaned up against. I turned to see Sam standing there, the actual last person on earth I wanted to see in that moment.

I rolled my eyes and looked away. He opened the door and I nearly fell out of the car, cursing him and his mother as he caught me so I didn't hit the hard ground. His eyes were wide and he let me go quickly before backing up several paces.

"Emily, we need to talk about this. Please." He looked worn out. Like he hadn't slept in years and would collapse from exhaustion any second. That, the mud caked and smeared across every inch of his body, and his lack of decent clothing or even shoes made it really hard not to pity him. I closed the car door behind me and crossed my arms over my chest expectantly.

"Well?" I said curtly.

"Not here." He said quietly, eyeing the completely empty parking lot around us suspiciously.

"My parents will be back any minute. What on earth do you expect me to tell them? Wait here while I go talk to my cousin's half naked ex-boyfriend? " My words dripped with venom and he recoiled like I had slapped him.

"I don't know but I promise I will get you a ride home the second you want one. Please just don't leave yet." His tone was pleading. I nodded reluctantly, curiosity getting the better of me.

"I'll be back as soon as they leave." He promised, turning and running back down the dusty dirt path trailing behind the ramshackle building.

I climbed back into the car and thought about what I would say. A half a second later my parents walked out of the store. Once they were back inside the car I cleared my throat. "Leah texted me and she's still pretty upset about the whole thing with Sam. I think she could really use some girl time and ever since Becca left I don't think she's been getting any. I'm gonna walk back to her place and spend a couple days with her, she said she could bring me back on Tuesday."

They eyed me wearily and I flashed my open phone at them, knowing their aging eyes wouldn't actually be able to make out the tiny words on the screen. "Isn't it you guys who always say 'family first'?" I asked, pointing to it.

My mom flashed my dad a look and he huffed out a sigh. "Okay Emily. Be sure to take your laptop so you can communicate with your professors." I nodded and grabbed my two small bags before climbing out of the car. I slung a bag over each shoulder and began walking back the way we came, waving to them as they pulled out of the parking lot in the opposite direction. As soon as they were out of sight Sam came loping back out of the woods to stand beside me.

"So where do you want to go now?" I asked dully.

Sam didn't say anything, just shoved his hands into his pockets and kicked the gravel in the exact same way Leah had the day before.

"Sam I don't understand why you are telling me all of this stuff. I don't want to be your imprint, okay? I do not accept. Leah is your soulmate, she is the one you should be begging to talk to."

"It's not exactly up to me, you know. I didn't ask for any of this. Leah is my best friend and I hate that I am hurting her, more than I hate anything else about this." He said and his hands, which he had pulled from his pockets to use emphatically while talking, started to tremble. I eyed them wearily, increasing the distance between us.

His face softened and he buried his trembling hands back into the pockets of his jean cut offs. "Emily, I may not know much about what's happening to me but I do know with absolute certainty that I could never hurt you. I would kill anyone, endure any pain just to keep you safe. I'm not asking you to love me back, I know how fucked up this whole situation is but you have to understand that if you leave you will be tearing me in half. I won't be able to protect you and it will kill me. I have a biological duty to this land and until the day I stop shifting I can't leave the boundaries of La Push. But being away from you now.." His face twisted in pain like he was being lashed by whips and burned alive at the same time.

"You need to listen up pal. I will never love you. You will never be mine to love. Whatever you and the elders think is going on here is all wrong. I was thinking about everything you said yesterday and maybe I'm going to become a shape-shifter, like you. That has to be the actual explanation for why you're feeling this connection. Because the universe or fate or whatever you want to call it would never do this to a person as amazing as Leah Clearwater. I know I sure won't." My voice cracked with despair, pleading with him to validate my imagined alternative as a viable option. Tears were welling up and threatening to spill over and I had to stop walking to wipe them before the blurriness made me trip over my own feet.

Sam was silent. I didn't look at his face, I just started walking forward again not caring if he followed. I walked to Second Beach and trudged quickly towards my familiar old hiding place, slipping through a nearly invisible crack in the slate that was shielded by a large pile of dried out driftwood.

I continued quickly uphill through the black tunnel trying not to think of the bats surely dangling overhead that had always terrified me. After a few minutes I emerged from the other side into a wide open cave carved craggly into the side of a high cliff. The vast open space was large enough for a whale to swim comfortably inside of, if the water ever rose high enough to allow one access. I plopped down in the center as close to the edge as I could be without falling over it, dangling my legs over angry gray waves as they slammed repeatedly into the sharp rocks several hundred feet below. Being here had always cleared my mind, reminded me how very small I, and my problems, actually were in the grand scheme of things.

Much to my chagrin my current problem emerged from the black opening of the tunnel a few seconds later. His eyes widened and he ran to my side reaching towards me like he was going to drag me backwards. I glared at him in warning and he hesitated.

"Do not touch me." I snapped, but I pulled my legs up and scooted myself back a few feet to ease his panic.

He lowered himself down a few feet away and sighed. I curled my arms around my legs and tried to focus on how small he did look here. After a while he laid down completely, propping his arm behind his head as a makeshift pillow. He was snoring lightly within seconds.

I sat there for a long time, listening to Sam's steady breathing and the comforting sounds of the familiar ocean. I fiddled with the sleeve of Leah's sweatshirt that I had accidentally stolen. I knew she wouldn't mind though, Leah was kind that way. She would want me to have it if it meant I was warm. Guilt welled in my chest and silent tears streamed down my cheeks.

Sam startled awake not too long later and I wiped my face quickly with the back of my hand.

"Ready to head back?" I asked, "I need to talk to Leah and find out if she's gonna be okay with me staying there tonight."

Sam stood up and offered me a hand. I ignored it and stood up, walking to the mouth of the narrow tunnel.

We emerged back onto Second Beach, I walked forwards toward my Aunt and Uncle's house but Sam didn't follow. I turned to look at him.

"I'm going to make things right with Leah." He said. I opened my mouth to deliver a snippy retort but he continued before I could get the words out. "Things haven't been right in our relationship for a long time, a lot longer than just this wolf stuff. I could never admit it to myself before because I didn't know the difference between loving someone, and being in love with them. Leah is and always will be my best friend and I hate knowing I went about this in the worst way possible, but you need to understand that we definitely would have broken up anyway." He looked at me expectantly and I bit my cheek and looked away.

"If I didn't have sympathy for what you're going through I wouldn't be here right now. I know you aren't really the bad guy here Sam, but I refuse to be party to anything that hurts Leah." I said softly.

"Then you and I are on the same page." He vowed, and I eyed him doubtfully.

"No seriously Em. I'm not asking you for anything, you don't even have to be my friend. I just need you to stick around La Push for a while so I can try to sort this out without becoming incompasitated with anxiety." I smiled involuntarily and he seemed satisfied by that, enough to stop talking anyway. He walked over to where I stood and before I knew what he was doing he wrapped his arms around me. I could tell that in that moment he really just needed a hug, so I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and gave him one quick squeeze before pulling back. His arms around me were rigid though and I couldn't step away. I looked up at his face and his eyes looked murderous, his teeth were clenched so tightly in his jaw I thought they might start cracking.

"Sam?" I asked in horror. His wild eyes flashed down to mine and he gave me one hard shove away from him.

It wasn't hard enough.