"Well then Miura-san, shall we go?"

"Eh? Ah, right then."

As I followed Yukinoshita out of the room I wondered, not for the first time today, what the hell I was even doing.

I'll be the first to admit that I have trouble getting along with Yukinoshita at the best of times. Not that I'm saying I couldn't talk to her or even, god forbid, that I was afraid of her like some people I could name! I just always have such a hard time around her. She doesn't talk or act like any other girl I've ever met which is saying something because I know a lot.

It wasn't like going to Yukinoshita for help was something I even wanted to do! Things somehow always seem to end up so complicated whenever she, or her entire club really, gets involved in anything!

But this time… this time there really isn't anyone else who might be able to help. Tobe was pretty much useless, Hina wouldn't be able to help with something like this. Maybe I should have gotten Yui to tag along, if nothing else it would make talking to Yukinoshita easier if she were there, but no I didn't want to drag her into this and make her worry about something she couldn't do anything about. I didn't want any more people knowing about this then I had to.

"Let us find a suitable area for discussion then."

It was with that ridiculously formal sentence that I found myself staring after Yukinoshita's back as she walked down the hall without another word and it took me a few seconds to remember to follow her.

"Hey wait up!" I called out as I half walked, half jogged after her. "How far do you even plan on going? Do you even know where you're going?"

"There are unused classrooms along the hall this way." She said without turning around. "It won't be difficult to find one to accommodate our needs."

"A-Ah. Alright then. That's fine." I answered, slowing down as I caught up to her.

We weren't really friends so walking beside her would have felt weird and I didn't know where we were going either so I stayed a step or two behind Yukinoshita as I followed her down the hall.

For a while we went along like that but soon I began to feel uncomfortable. I'm not used to it being so quiet. Whenever I was with my friends we were always laughing and talking so much you never even realized how much time has passed until someone noticed how late it had gotten on their phone. Without all that, even just a short walk like this was starting to feel like a drag.

For a second I actually thought about chatting with Yukinoshita, just to break the silence, but I quickly decided against it. I just did my best to bear with the quiet but it wasn't easy, especially with how obvious it was that Yukinoshita wasn't bothered by it in the least.

For a little while we walked liked that. It was probably only a minute or two, but having nothing to chat about made it feel longer than it should have. What made it worse was that, with nothing to distract me, I couldn't help but remember the other reason I didn't like hanging around Yukinoshita.

Even just walking behind her, even when I was trying my best not to notice, I couldn't stop myself from seeing it all. Her long black hair, sleeker and glossier than any girl's I've ever seen. That smooth porcelain white skin, utterly perfect and unblemished. Those long doe like legs so sculpted that I'm sure even professional gravure models would bite their fingers off just to have. Even the way she walked was so faultless that I sometimes wondered whether she actually practiced like those people in those old movies who had to cross a long room while balancing a stack of books or a glass of water on top of their. She barely even wore any makeup, it was just so unfair!

No matter what else you might think about her, nobody could deny that Yukinoshita was a beauty that was just out of this world and when it's another girl telling you that you know it's true.

And that's why I really hated being around her sometimes.

I mean not to brag but I know I'm gorgeous. I've been asked out enough times to know I'm not just being full of myself in thinking it. I've got a damn good figure and I always worked hard every single day to look as great as I did. Yet every time I found myself next to Yukinoshita I felt like I was that awkward thirteen year old again, still clumsily trying on makeup for the first time, strutting back and forth and posing in front of a mirror and doing everything I could to try to make myself look like the mature women I was growing into and not the kid playing dress up I still was.

If that wasn't enough, it wasn't just her looks that were great either. Whether it was studying, exams or sports, she was the best at everything she did and she made it all look effortless to boot!

Even after her attitude drove away so many people she could have had eating out of the palm of her hand, so many of them still wouldn't stop whispering about how great she was. About just what a perfect person she was. Even with my own friends who were always complimenting me how pretty and great I was, I could never get rid of the feeling that the only reason I was getting all the praise was because she wasn't there. Like it was a competition I was only winning because Yukinoshita never even bothered entering.

And that was the absolute worst part about it all. You couldn't even rightly hate her for all of it because she wasn't even trying to flaunt herself in the first place!

It was like she didn't even know just how blessed she was! If she bragged or rubbed it in our faces it'd be one thing but she didn't seem to give a single damn about any of it despite being better than all of us combined and that somehow just made everything even worse!

You get angry at her for making every other girl around look so bad and then you get angry at yourself for being such a petty, shallow bitch.

You just couldn't win when it came to Yukinoshita.

Even now, after I've gotten to know her better and know that she's not just a stuck-up rich bitch like some of the other girls I know like to call her, just walking behind her I still couldn't help but straighten myself up, hold my head higher and try and walk in a way that felt completely unnatural just to keep pace with her. I'm not sure if that feeling will ever go away.

"I believe this classroom has been unoccupied for some time. We can make use of it now to have our discussion."

"Alright." I muttered stepping in as Yukinoshita opened the door for me. I haven't been in a good mood when I first came here and the walk here didn't help with that either.

Stepping closer to the window I turned around and waited. Yukinoshita shut the door behind her before turning around, flicking her hair out of her face as she did so. Without even meaning to, I felt my eyes follow the way those black locks flowed through the air. I shook my head to get mind to focus.

"So then, what precisely do you need to speak with me about that you could not say in front of everyone else?"

Right, the thing I needed to ask her. I've been working myself up for this all week but now that it's finally happening I could feel my hands starting getting sweaty and my legs felt like they were turning into jelly. It felt totally gross.

I breathed, taking a deep breath in before letting it out. Alright I can do this. Just pretend you're swallowing that bitter medicine you've always hated taking but had to take anyway because you were sick. After coming this far, this isn't the time to be getting cold feet. I resisted the urge to slap my own cheeks to psych myself up.

"Miura-san?"

"Don't rush me ok!" I snapped. Geez couldn't she have a bit of patience?

Yukinoshita frowned but mercifully stayed silent. Taking a few more breaths I readied myself to talk.

"Just to be clear this is only something I'm telling you, ok?" I demanded. "You don't go around spreading this to anyone else, you hear me?"

"I would have thought such a thing was already made implicit by my agreement to speak with you in private, but very well, you have my word that whatever we discuss today will remain in confidence."

God, I'd forgotten how insufferable Yukinoshita could be at times, but as long as she was ok with keeping this a secret it was fine I suppose.

"Alright then." I breathed in deeply and screwed my eyes shut.

Here we go.

"I need some- I want your advice for getting Hayato a birthday present."

There.

I said it.

It felt like I was swallowing the world's sourest lemon but I managed to say it.

I definitely never wanted to have to go to Yukinoshita for help with something like this but I've run out of other ideas.

I mean it was already September, our final year was almost over and everyone was going to have to start to studying like crazy soon because of our exams and then afterwards Hayato-

No.

If I think about that again I'll just start sulking again. Or I'll get angry. Either one wouldn't help my problem right now so I just pushed that thought away and tried to focus on what was happening right now.

I licked my lips and opened my eyes, ready to see any number of ways Yukinoshita might act. Maybe she'd be angry that I was poking into her past with Hayato again. She always did get upset whenever it came up.

What I wasn't prepared for was the look of pure confusion on Yukinoshita's face.

"Why in the world would you come to me for something like that?"

I felt a sudden urge to turn around and bash my head against the wall. I mean really! Do I actually have to spell this out for her?! For a genius who's ranked first on every test we've ever had for as long as I could remember, she could be so thick at times. As is, I just growled out loud for having to explain something that should have been obvious.

"Obviously because you two grew up together." I spat out and I couldn't stop myself from sounding sullen as I spoke. "You've known each other for years. You're childhood friends. Your families know each other, they work together. You guys probably hung out together a lot when you were kids. There should be plenty of things you know about him!"

The way Yukinoshita started rubbing her head with her hand was starting to piss me off a little but I did my best to stay calm.

"Setting aside your reasoning for coming to me with this for the moment, why did you even feel the need to keep such an innocuous request a secret?"

My teeth started to grind together, a bad habit of mine that I'd been trying to kick. Seriously, what was with all the stupid questions?

She can't imagine having a hard time if she somehow had to come to me to help her with something? Doesn't she realise just how humiliating it is that I have to ask her of all people for advice for something involving Hayato? To have to admit that she might know something about him that I didn't? Maybe it was stupid but even asking in private like this somehow still felt like I was admitting to losing to her in some way.

More importantly, doesn't she understand what would happen if this somehow actually got out in school? Does she really have no idea what everyone will think if they knew I actually had to ask Yukinoshita for birthday advice about Hayato. Does she really not see what that would look like? It'd be a complete and total nightmare!

Ugh this is getting me nowhere.

Straightening up, I ignored her question and crossed my arms, giving Yukinoshita my best glare. "Look just… are you going to help me or not?" I demanded.

She didn't answer me straight away but just stood in place with an expression on her face I couldn't put a word on. I wondered what she was going through her head. I'm sure that, since I brought it up, she'd be thinking about her memories from growing up with Hayato.

Even though I've prepared myself for it I could still feel my stomach tossing and turning at the idea. No matter what she said and no matter how things are now, I knew for sure there was something between them once before. There's no way Hayato would act the way he does around her otherwise. I'm sure there were parts of his life that nobody at school knew about but her. It's why I came to her in the first place but that didn't mean it made me any happier about it.

Gritting my teeth, I dug my nails into my palms and shook those thoughts away. It doesn't matter anyway, it's all in the past after all. This is too important for me to ignore just because it made me a little uncomfortable. No matter what relationship they had before, it doesn't change the way things are now. I'm sure the bond I have with Hayato now isn't any less special to the one he used to have with her. That he's shared things with me that she doesn't about either.

I need to believe in that.

"I suppose there aren't any reasons for me to refrain from offering you my suggestions." She said at last. "Very well please give me a moment to think."

Without even realizing it I released the breath I'd been holding, feeling like I was relaxing stress in my body I didn't even know I had. At least the hard part was done now.

Yukinoshita put one hand under her chin while the other held her elbow. With her eyes closed and the way the light coming through the window was shining on her, it somehow felt like I was looking at a scene that belonged on the cover of a magazine for teenage girls. Almost without realizing it I found myself starting to scowl. I shook my head again and tried not to look at her directly, doing my best not to fidget as I waited.

Finally Yukinoshita opened her eyes.

"As Hayama-kun is the captain of the soccer club something along the lines of the sport would be-"

"That's no good." I said, shaking my head. I also felt a bit annoyed. I mean did Yukinoshita really think I hadn't thought of something so obvious already? "Tobe's already getting him something soccer related. Same as he did last year in fact."

"I see." Yukinoshita's expression became thoughtful. After a few seconds she opened her mouth again.

"How about a guitar of some kind? The both of you performed in last year's cultural festival and Hayama-kun seemed quite adept with-"

"That won't work either. His parents got him a brand new guitar for Christmas last year. He doesn't need another one." I interrupted again and I couldn't stop myself from frowning this time. "What else do you have?"

Yukinoshita went quiet as she began to think again. The time seemed to drag on longer than before and I couldn't stop myself from getting a little worried.

Did she really need to think so hard about this? Everything she'd told me so far weren't the kinds of ideas I'd been expecting. So far, everything she's come up with were things anyone in school could have told me about Hayato if I'd asked. I didn't need her to tell me things I already knew about him, I needed to know the parts about his life that I couldn't see just by being close to him in Sobu or even when we hang out outside of school. I needed to know something more personal.

That's the whole reason I even came to her in the first place!

"…In that case then perhaps some guitar related accessories? There are a range of custom made cases and maintenance kits available. If you're aware what Hayama-kun's current model is then it should be easy enough to-"

"Oh for crying out loud!" I finally cried out, fighting the urge to pull on my hair. "All of those are things I could've figured out myself! Why are you even telling me things I already know?"

Yukinoshita looked blankly back at me.

"I can only offer you suggestions based on my own observations of Hayama-kun's interests. Given the difference in our familiarity, it is only natural that you would be more acquainted with what he may like as a gift."

"Well that's not why I'm here." I growled in frustration. "Didn't I say it before? You grew up together. You should know tons of things about him that might be able to help me."

"I didn't bring this up earlier because I thought it went without saying." Ugh could she say anything without sounding like such a bitch? "But any advice I can offer based on my knowledge of Hayama-kun as a child is unlikely to be useful as a reference in the present."

"Well duh of course I know that! But I still need to get Hayato a present he normally wouldn't think he'd get from me! That's why I came to you, so get to it already!"

Now Yukinoshita was starting to look a bit pissed herself.

"You're being rather ill-mannered for someone asking me for a favor." Her voice was still calm but I could tell it was starting to take some effort. "As I've already explained to you, I have not been in contact with Hayama-kun for many years to this point. I do not know what particular insight you are after but, whatever it is, I doubt it's something that I could offer."

I opened my mouth, ready to let some angry words of my own fly, but I managed to force them back with effort.

Ugh. Why does this always happen! I didn't come here to pick a fight but it somehow always ends up that way even when I don't mean it to! Getting angry wouldn't help me here. I only came to her for this small bit of help. I just need to get the info I needed and then I could go and take care of the rest myself.

"Look just… tell me what you can and I'll go, ok?" I managed to say. "Doesn't have to be specifically about you two as kids, just… anything you think could be helpful."

"Why do you even need something so specific? Hayama-kun is not a materialistic person and based on your relationship with him I would imagine he would be happy with almost any gift you could get for him?"

Oh for the love of… the last thing I needed was for Yukinoshita to start asking questions. I mean if she really isn't close to him anymore why does she even need to pry? Couldn't she just give me what I need and we can all leave happy?!

"It's… it's our last year in high school ok?" I said, throwing out the first excuse that came to mind. "I… just want this year's gift to be special, that's all."

For a moment I thought she was going to argue about it more. I've been around Yukinoshita enough times to recognise that flash in her eyes but just when I thought she was gearing up to begin another argument I saw her stop mid-breath. I watched her lift a hand to her chest and take in a long breath before slowly letting it out in a big sigh, closing her eyes as she did so.

I waited for a few more minutes and just when I felt like calling out again she opened her eyes again.

"Are you aware of Hayama-kun's family business?"

I blinked in surprise.

"I… think I remembering him saying that his parents have their own company." I admitted cautiously. "Something to do with law or business I think?"

"Indeed, his father is the founder and administrator of a large law firm that specialises in corporate law and business consultations."

I nodded along silently, but I began to get a slow sinking feeling in my stomach. Somehow I couldn't get rid of the feeling that I wasn't going to like whatever Yukinoshita was about to say next.

"I cannot say this with absolute certainty but I do remember even as far back when Hayama-kun was a child that he'd always spoken strongly about one day joining his father's business."

I stiffened.

"If Hayama-kun still intends to take over his family's company in the future, then he will most likely be looking to get into universities that are renowned for its courses in Law."

Both my hands clenched themselves into fists and, no matter how hard I tried to get them to stay still, began to shake.

"It may be somewhat unorthodox as a gift idea but in terms of uniqueness that may actually be to your advantage."

I was staring at the ground now, trying to block out Yukinoshita's words. More than anything I wanted her to stop talking but it felt like there was a huge lump in my throat that kept me from speaking.

"If that is acceptable there are several reputable texts on the subject that I can recommend. Of course the exact volumes will vary depending on what university and courses Hayama-kun plans on applying for but I'm sure it won't be difficu-"

"School books? Seriously?!" I interrupted in disgust, finally bringing my head up and glaring straight at Yukinoshita, unable to stomach hearing anymore. "Is that really the best you can come up with?! I thought you were supposed to be smart! Are you even trying anymore?! In the first place what kind of weirdo even gives somebody textbooks as a birthday present?! I mean besides you!"

Yukinoshita didn't seem to like that. Narrowing her eyes she spoke to me in her coldest voice yet.

"You wished for me to offer what knowledge I may have on Hayama-kun's future and that's what I've given you. Do not belittle the messenger simply because you do not like the message. Especially when you have spent the better part of these past few years in Hayama-kun's presence on a near daily basis yet evidently have so little confidence in what you have gleaned in that time that you must come to me for counsel."

My temper flared. Her voice was frosty enough I wouldn't have been surprised if snowflakes started falling out of the air but I was honestly too angry to care at this point.

"I came to you because you were supposed to know things about him that I didn't!" I snarled back, "That's the only reason I'd ever come to you for anything! But you can't even do that can you?!"

Without even waiting for her answer I turned around and walked closer to the window, looking out across the school, taking deep breaths and trying my best to keep my temper from running out of control. This was ridiculous. This should have a quick and simple little thing to take care of but it's instead exploded into this giant headache. What did I ever do to deserve this?

I didn't hear Yukinoshita saying anything else but from the somewhat loud sound of her breathing I heard behind me I guessed she was doing her best to try and calm down too. That was good I suppose. The last thing I needed was for things to get even worse than they already were.

Time passed and for a while we just stayed like that, out of each other's way and I felt myself starting to calm down and I could start thinking clearly again.

I quickly got bored of looking at the sky and clouds and, out of habit, peered towards the sports fields instead, trying to pick out Hayato from the rest of the soccer club playing on the green. I spent a few minutes looking back and forth before I suddenly remembered.

Hayato had quit the team near the beginning of the year. The entire soccer club had whined about it, Tobe loudest out of them all, but Hayato had been firm that he needed to focus on his studies for the remainder of the year. I didn't think much of it at the time but with everything that's happened now I probably should have been more suspicious…

Suddenly feeling sick I pushed myself back off the window.

At this point I'm not even sure what else I could ask. It didn't feel like I'm gonna get any useful information out of Yukinoshita, but at the same time just walking away empty handed after coming all this way didn't sit right with me either. She was blocking the way to the door anyway.

"In any case I those are my suggestions for what a suitable birthday gift may be for Hayama-kun." I finally heard Yukinoshita say. "I'm sorry if they weren't what you were hoping for but this really is the best I can offer based on my knowledge."

I still didn't feel like talking to her so I just grunted, maybe it was rude but I was too tired to care anymore.

"I believe that you should have more faith in your own judgement. I understand it can be… daunting trying to pick out the perfect gift for someone close to you and a failure to do so can somehow feel like a reflection on yourself but you shouldn't invest so much importance in material items that you lose sight of more important things. Given that Hayama-kun's birthday is only four days from now, there isn't much time left for indecision. I suggest that you-"

Wait a minute.

"Hold on, what did you say just now?" I blurted out, turning around to face Yukinoshita. My mind honed in on a particular sentence I heard. It couldn't have been what I think it was could it? I could feel my stomach beginning to twist.

"That you should have faith in-?"

"Not that! You know when Hayato's birthday is?!"

"…It is September the 28th is it not?"

It was.

I could only stare blankly at Yukinoshita as I struggled to understand the bombshell she just dropped.

"H-How do you even know that?" I finally stammered out. "I've never seen you at any of his parties!"

Yukinoshita just lifted an eyebrow and somehow that little gesture felt even more annoying to me than it usually did.

"Obviously it's because we grew up together. That's all."

"That's all?" I repeated like a parrot even as I starting to see red.

If I stop and think about it I didn't even have a good reason to think that Yukinoshita wouldn't know Hayato's birthday. It wasn't like it was even that big of a secret. It shouldn't have been a surprise that Yukinoshita knew it but somehow it still ended up being a huge shock to me. More than that, it just felt wrong, like she was intruding on something that I'd thought belonged to me alone.

Maybe it was my frustration over everything finally boiling over, maybe it was just a chance to finally vent some of those terrible feelings I've been holding back all this time, but before I even knew it I was practically shouting out the first words that jumped into my mind without even thinking about them.

"You always go on and on about how whatever it was between you two was in the past but even after you stopped being friends for so long you still remember his birthday? Seriously? What the hell! Isn't that creepy?!"

I knew it was a stupid thing to get angry over, that I wasn't being fair, that I was making a huge deal out of something that was probably nothing but I could feel it welling up, impossible for me to stop.

That old feeling I hated so much.

For the longest time, all the way from when I first met her, I've never liked Yukinoshita but ever since I found out Hayato and Yukinoshita actually knew each other from before Sobu, back during that one summer camp when we started arguing over something I can't even remember and Hayato took her side instead of mine. Ever since then…

Now whenever I hear about something involving the two of them... I felt so sick that it almost felt like I needed to throw up. Those stupid rumors that Yukinoshita and Hayama had started dating over New Years… When I found out she used to give him Valentine's Day chocolate…. And of course, that expression Hayato wears every time he hears about Yukinoshita, the one he's never shown anyone else. Not even me…

What made it a hundred times worse was the way Hayato would clam up no matter how I tried to ask about it. Was it really something so important that he couldn't even tell me about it? Every time it happens I just wanted to cover up my ears, scream and block it all out. To just pretend that the whole thing didn't even exist but at the same time I felt like I couldn't just ignore it, that I had to find out the truth no matter how hard I had to push, who it might end up hurting, even if it turned out to be something I didn't like. I needed to know.

"Or… don't tell me… you've still been giving him presents every year too?! Your families always have those get-togethers at New Years don't they?! They probably expect you two to mingle together because you two are the same age don't they?! Does he know your birthday too?! Don't tell me he actually get you birthday presents every year as well?!"

It drove me crazy whenever it came up so most of the time I just did my best not to think about it. I hated how it made me feel inside but even worse, I hated how it made me act. I knew I looked bad, that acting like this only made me come across as a clingy, jealous bitch, but I just couldn't help it! What else did she know about him? What does she know about him that I don't know? A horrible thought suddenly jumped into my head.

Was it even possible she knew about-

"This again."

I stopped talking instantly but it was already too late. I'd crossed a line this time.

Yukinoshita was glaring, actually glaring, at me. I've seen her give some pretty intimidating stares before, sometimes to me, sometimes to someone else, but this one blew all the others I've seen right out of the sky. I actually found myself stepping back because of how hatefully she was looking at me.

"I'd honestly hoped that you've grown past this." She continued, her voice low and dangerous. "Are you truly so insecure that such a small thing is enough to destroy the entirety of the faith you hold in your own relationships? As I told you once before, I'll say again once more. Hayama-kun and I were simply familiar with each other in the past. Whatever affiliation between us then is long finished."

Yukinoshita's voice began to get louder.

"Have you forgotten the events of last year already? When all those rumors proved to be nothing more than unfounded hearsay? Does Hayama-kun's own word on the matter mean nothing to you either? How about the fact that I'm already in a relationship with someone whom I cherish very much? Did any of that even cross your mind before you decided to wildly accuse me?"

I found myself stepping back further and further with every point she made. I don't think I've ever seen Yukinoshita get this angry before. Not even that one time after New Years, when I'd been utterly determined to get to the root of Hayato's strange behavior and almost started an actual fight with her.

All my indignation from before seemed to vanish, I couldn't even find it in myself to argue back with how harshly Yukinoshita was scolding me. Anything I could say would only get shot down in an instant. Even worse, the more I listened the more began to feel ashamed. What was I doing? I'd promised myself beforehand that I wasn't going to let this end up turning into something like this yet here we are. It was honestly worst than being told off by my mom.

My vision seemed to blur as a soft burning feeling came from my eyes. I blinked and realized, to my horror, that they were tears. Furiously I resisted the urge to rub at them and forced my hands to stay still. Why does this always happen? Whenever I get into an argument with Yukinoshita I end up feeling like I was the bad guy! Why couldn't she have just given me the answer I wanted and we could have avoided all of this?

In that moment I couldn't help but wish that Yui or even Hikigaya was in the room with us right now. At least if they were here things probably wouldn't have gone this badly.

Yukinoshita was breathing pretty hard by the time she was finished, even her face had gone a bit red. Worse, the vibe between us felt even more awkward then it was before. It didn't feel like I could say anything to her at all, much less continue things where they were left off and with how quiet Yukinoshita was being I'm guessing she was in the same boat. This entire thing has just turned into one giant mess.

Our stare off lasted for a long while, neither of us making a move to break the silence until finally Yukinoshita drew herself up and I cringed back, afraid she was going to start up again.

"In any case I have given you my suggestions." She said in a flat voice. "You may take them into consideration or disregard them at your leisure. Regardless, I wish you luck with your endeavor."

Without another word she turned and walked back towards the door. Blinking my eyes I stared dumbly after her for a few seconds before I broke out of my spell.

"Hey, wait a minute! Where are you going?!"

Sliding the door open, Yukinoshita didn't even bother turning around. "I am returning to the clubroom. I do not have so much free time that I care to spend it entertaining your insecurities. Goodbye Miura-san."

"Wait, wait, wait, WAIT!" I called out desperately, taking several steps up to her. "I said wait!"

Yukinoshita stopped but she didn't turn around. Even with her back to me I could still see her sigh.

"I have already given you the full extent of my knowledge in regards to your request. I don't see what else you could possibly want from me anymore."

"Look just… hold off for a second ok." I said weakly, more to stop her leaving than because I had anything I wanted to say. "Just hear me out for a sec, ok!"

At this point I wasn't even sure what I was doing anymore. I mean Yukinoshita had a point didn't she? She'd already told me everything she knew and, despite everything I said earlier, I don't really think she was lying either. But I just know that I'm not ready to just leave things as they are now.

"It's just… I've… everyone's just been really stressed out lately y'know? With everything that's been happening this year, studying for exams and looking at different college's… it all feels like we barely have any time left for us to just hang out anymore."

Yukinoshita finally turned back around. From the look on her face it didn't really seemed like she believed me, but at least I'd managed to get her to stay for now.

"It's like… everyone is just… everyone is just really nervous about what's going to happen after we graduate. None of it really feels real even when we do talk about what we're gonna do with our futures… I mean at least those of us who actually have plans…"

"You mean Hayama-kun." Yukinoshita interrupted.

"…yeah." I nodded unhappily, twisting my hands in front of me as I did so. I didn't trust myself to say anything more. The longer I talk about this the more it feels like I'm gonna slip up and say something I didn't want her knowing about.

Maybe Yukinoshita wasn't the best person for this but she was the best I had right now. I couldn't just let her go like this, not when I still wasn't any closer to solving my problem. I couldn't let all this be for nothing. I had to try and get through to her. I'm sure that if I could just get her to stay a bit longer I could work things out.

"So that's… that's why I'm trying so hard to get Hayato something special this time." I forced myself to continue. "I mean I might not ever get another chance once we graduate and I needed someone who might be able to help finding something that he'd like…"

I slowly trailed off as a crazy thought jumped into my head.

It was an insane, wild, absolutely crazy idea and, if I had any other option, I wouldn't even think about going through with it but I didn't have any other ideas and so, before I had a chance to think it through and change my mind, I found myself talking.

"Actually the thing is… I was planning to go shopping right after this. Y'know to get Hayato's present after I'd talked to you…"

"Alright." Yukinoshita said, clearly waiting for me to get to the point.

"But see… your advice wasn't really been very helpful, not that it's really your fault I guess! But right now I don't really have any better ideas so like, if I had someone with me with another opinion it might help…"

Yukinoshita's blank face told me that she had no idea where I was going with this and I had to fight back an annoyed sigh. Guess I had to be obvious about this.

"Come with me." I blurted out.

Now Yukinoshita did look surprised.

"You… want me to help you with gift shopping?"

"Yeah that's right."

"You cannot be serious."

"Well why not!" I shot back, getting a little annoyed at Yukinoshita's reaction. I mean, I'm not exactly thrilled about the idea either. "I mean it's still pretty early in the day isn't it? I'm just asking you to help out with this for one day is all!"

"You cannot simply demand something like this out of the blue and expect me to drop everything I have planned today for your sake alone."

My teeth started to grind together again. I didn't want to waste any more time arguing with her. Did she really think I somehow wanted to do this? It wasn't like I'm exactly happy about having her come along either! It's not like I'm even asking her for some huge thing like borrowing money or helping me pass the next exam! I just need her to help me pick out a gift was all! Yui or Hina would have gone along with me without even asking questions so why couldn't she?!

Saying all that wouldn't help though. I needed think of a way to get her to come along without asking any more questions. Something that would get Yukinoshita to agree without having to worry about anything else. There had to be something I could say!

And just like that it came to me.

"Ok, how about this. You're still a member of that club right? Then I'll make this an official request. Come with me when I go shopping."

It looked like Yukinoshita really didn't see that one coming.

I saw her open her mouth, as if she were going to argue back, but before she even said anything Yukinoshita blinked once, as if she needed a second to process what I just said. Slowly, she raised her hand to her chin again and it looked like she was thinking about what I just said pretty deeply. I held my breath.

After a few minutes she let out a small sigh.

"I see."

I barely stop myself from letting out a gasp of relief. It actually worked! Why didn't I think of this sooner? Now, Yukinoshita will come along and best of all she won't even need to ask any more questions. Sometimes I surprise myself with how smart I could be.

Now that I've gotten her with me I just need to figure out how what I can use her help with. I still wasn't clear on the details but I'm sure I can just work those out as I go. Spending an entire day with just Yukinoshita wasn't how I was planning on doing things but I'll just have put up with it. All I need to do now is-

"I refuse."

What!

"What!" I sputtered, not sure whether I heard her right. "Why?! I'm making a request here! That's what your club does right? You can't just say no!"

"In point of fact, I can." Yukinoshita said in that know-it-all way that always makes me so angry. "The purpose of the Service Club may be to help those in need but we reserve the right to refuse requests that are frivolous, uncourteous or have been made in bad faith."

"Bad faith?!" I repeated, starting to get angry again. "Exactly what part of this is bad faith?! You may not understand but this is actually important to me!"

"I'm sure it is, however I honestly do not see any merit in my accompanying you while you're browsing for Hayama-kun's gift. If our encounter up to this point has shown nothing else it's that my presence would be of little use, if not an outright hindrance at worst. Moreover…"

Yukinoshita's voice grew harder.

"Even if I were willing to put aside how transparently manipulative this sudden request of yours is, you have not been a particularly gracious client today at all. I understand my suggestions may not have been what you were hoping for, and that you've been under stress about the future, but that is no excuse for the way you've behaved."

Yukinoshita folded her arms.

"Taken all together, unless you can give me an actual concrete reason why I should accompany you on this errand, then I'm afraid this will be the end of it."

I could only stare in disbelief.

This wasn't what I'd been expecting at all. Out of all the worst case scenarios I'd thought about before I came here I never once even thought that Yukinoshita would actually leave me out to dry. That she'd refuse to help me at all.

I found myself looking down at the ground blankly.

Why? Doesn't she have any idea what I'm going through?

No matter how hard I tried to hold them back, I could feel angry tears begin welling up in my eyes again.

Can't she see how much this means to me?

My chest felt heavy, like there was a massive weight inside it, and that feeling only seemed to grow with every breath I took.

Didn't she know what it was like being trapped in this situation?

My arms started to shake. To stop them I clenched my hands into fists and clamped them against my side, as stiff as wood.

Doesn't she understand?

Yukinoshita didn't bluff. Unless I could come up with something then I'd really be left on my own, right where I started. Having no idea what I could do and an entire day used up with nothing to show for it. What do I do now? What can I say?

Without even meaning to, my mind began to go back…

To that awful night that started all of this…

The things that I learned…

How nothing felt the same anymore…

The reason I was even here…

And Hayato…

"Because I made a mistake!" I finally exploded, angrily looking up at Yukinoshita, not caring if she could see what a mess my face probably was.

Yukinoshita stepped back in surprise but all my feelings felt like a flood finally bursting through a dam. I couldn't hold back anymore even if I wanted to.

"I made a mistake and I'm running out of time to fix it! Do you really think I'd be here asking you of all people to help me with this if it wasn't important?! If I had any other ideas?! You were friends with Hayato once! You of all people should know what I'm going through right now! Why don't you get that?! Why can't you understand?!"

I had to stop to take a breath.

"If I don't do this… if I can't make things right… then it feels like I'm going to lose everything! I'll lose it all and I'll never get it back! I can't let that happen! I won't let that happen! That's why… that's why..!"

It was getting harder and harder to talk. I sniffed loudly, trying to clear my nose. I lifted my arm and furiously wiped at my eyes.

"That's why I…"

The reason I came here.

"I…"

The reason I went to Yukinoshita.

"…I need your help!"

My words seemed to echo in the room. The only other sound I could hear was my heavy breathing.

Yukinoshita was silent, looking at me with an expression I couldn't describe. To be honest, I didn't even mean to say everything that I did. My mouth felt like it was running all on its own. The last thing I wanted was to involve her in this anymore than I needed to, but maybe that was actually the problem. Maybe I've been going about this the wrong way from the beginning.

I wiped my face with my sleeve again, not caring if I made a mess of my uniform. I felt a bit better now that I've gotten some of my feelings off my chest but now it looked like Yukinoshita didn't know what to say anymore. It didn't seem like she was going to just go and leave me on my own anymore but at the same time I couldn't tell if she was actually going to help me or not.

Still, she looked unsure…

"Yukinoshita."

My mouth felt dry and I swallowed hard, I pressed my arms to my side and stiffly bent my back down. Slowly and awkwardly I bowed my head low. On the floor, I could see her shoes shuffling in surprise.

Licking my lips and gritting my teeth I spoke.

"Please."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…very well."