So, last time I wrote a Kenny fic I did one where his immortality didn't exist really. But, after re-watching 'Mysterion Rises' and reading a bunch of fics about Cthulhu, I came up w this idea about his curse! We'll see where this goes, lol.
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The western air bit at the young couple's skin that night. Leaving the truck's front parked in a sloppy row with the others as they looked down the abandoned dirt hill to where the fire pit grew rapidly. Being fed by members as the people gathered encouraged the couple to come with them.
The man, dirty blond hair in a short shag with a thin mustache, scratched his skull under his trucker's cap apprehensively. Shoving another hand into his dark blue jeans pocket underneath his worn grey sweater. The nervous hand of his fiancée reached for his pocket chain and he looked at her. Bright red hair tied back in a high pony with a black bandana tied as a headband, matching her black sleeveless leather vest over her white tee and jean skirt.
"We shouldn't have come here." She warned.
He looked to the group, many pulling out dark shawls as part of their ritual. "I'm sure it's fine."
"I want Kevin." She worried. Their four-year-old son was still home with the sitter. Carol had grown such love and admiration for their little boy that she wanted him now more than anything.
Stuart wondered if they were making the right decision. They were drunk enough off the beer from the junkyard party but conscious enough to make the decision. He looked to Carol's belly, seeing the small growth underneath her white tee and beginning to become too big for her normal skirts.
Kevin would be a big brother soon. Stuart would have another kid's mouth to feed. That is if Carol could have the baby at all. The doctor had said that there was a chance of failure revolving around the baby's growth. The meds and procedures helped but did not subside Carol's depression about losing her child.
If this group could at all help them, maybe it was the best decision to make for their children.
"I'll be here," Stuart said with a small grasp of Carol's hand. "The whole time, Carie."
The young mom shuddered, looking from her fiancé to the completed circle where the leader gestured to the young couple. She nodded, letting Stuart lead her as she worriedly looked at the bonfire.
The leader, covered in a black robe with gold trim though the hem of his white-washed jeans poked out at the bottom. He reached his arms up. "My children," he started. "Cthulhu has called for our labors in helping this young woman with her second pregnancy."
Many of the group kneeled, as one particular elder in a similar robe though with light blue trim encouraged the couple to the center. Carol clutched Stuart's arm as he led the way to meet with the leader near the bonfire.
"Carol," he hailed to the stars above, shooting his open palms into the air. Carol's eyes flicked down. Watching the man's jeans ride up and expose his bare ankles underneath. Amongst the firelight, a faint but noticeable tattoo marked his skin. A black ring circling what looked almost like an angry, demonic ocotpus. Or a squid for all she knew.
"Cthulhu," the leader begged to the stars. "It is you who gave us our Old Ones, and led them from the stars to earth before humans grazed your order. You gave us the earth and fled your people to the Pacific's waters. You gave us our name, our fortune. Please, help this child live."
He gave his open palms to Carol. She looked once to Stuart, before leaving his arm and shakily giving her hands to be held.
"Please, help this child live." He said. "And he will give you redemption through meed."
The red-head jerked. The fire burned bright against her wide and worried orbs. "What-?"
"Please, help this child live." The leader continued, loudening his voice. "That is not dead can eternal lie, and with strange aeons even death may die. "
People of the circle rested on their knees, holding their open palms to the stars in hail.
"My children," The leader gestured, slipping down onto his knees. His palms rested firmly on Carol's pregnant belly. "In his house at R'lyeh dead Cthulhu waits dreaming."
"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!" Stuart disturbingly looked at the group and their uncomprehensible chant. Like words from a creature he'd never thought to exist that exited these humans' mouths.
"Cthulhu waits dreaming!"
"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!"
Carol breathed anxiously, looking at the fire that roared threateningly.
"Cthulhu waits dreaming!"
"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!"
She couldn't see the face underneath the hood that held her belly. As he clutched the child inside her, she felt as though a hand reached in for her lungs and squeezed them tight. She breathed abnormally as she looked to the leader who drew his head up. His eyes rolled to the back of his head with only the whites exposed as he hissed in Cthulhu's tongue. Carol screamed.
9 years later...
"Alright, good morning students." PC greeted, standing before the blackboard of the fourth-grade classroom. "Since you've gained a new-found respect for your teacher since the Pajama Day incident, I'm here to observe your period-to-period classes today. Because I still don't trust a single one of you shit-mouths!"
The sea of fourth-graders blinked absently. Wondering what they did to deserve this.
"Since you seemed to show such negligence for Mr. Garrison's relationship and sexuality prior, I'll be watching closely. I better not hear any snickers towards gay-centered comments or references your teacher might make. And no fucking gender-specific language!"
Stan switched his gaze to Kyle, who shrugged unknowingly. It was going to be a long, insufferable day. PC watched the students with hawk eyes underneath his shades, pulling a stool underneath him near the teacher's desk and propping one foot up.
"Alright, children." Garrison started. "Does anyone remember where we left off?"
Butters urgently lifted his hand. "Tinder Drone Warfare?"
"Correct."
On the far left of the classroom, Kenny numbingly listened with his head slumped in his palm, tapping a pencil loosely against his notebook. Distracted by the boringness of the class, he didn't prepare for the whipping of a paper ball to knock him against the cheek and land on his desk. Kenny annoyingly looked to Cartman, the fatass pointing urgently to the crumpled message. Kenny quietly unfolded the message while flipping off Cartman for the hit.
Garrison's hairline looks like pubes.
Kenny snorted behind his hood, followed by Cartman's snickers.
"Is there a problem, boys?" Garrison asked.
"No, no, sir." Cartman wiped a tear. "That new Nair shampoo really suits you."
Kenny laughed louder.
"Excuse me!" PC jumped off his stool. "If you two can't accept the welfare of an old gay man going bald, you two can take it up with me and Mackey! Or, be sent for mandatory attendance in the Denver LGBTQ+ March!"
"This is bullcrap!" Cartman complained at the boys' table at lunch. "I make one balding joke on a teacher who happens to be gay. Big fucking whoop!"
"You two started it," Kyle chimed to both him and Kenny.
"I'm so sick of Project PC messing up this skewl!"
"You better not say that too loud," Stan advised. "Dude can hear everything."
Cartman gave him a sharp look. "Yeah? Can he hear me say he can suck my balls?"
"I do, Eric," the boys stiffened, awkwardly looking around to the approaching principal who stopped by Cartman's seat. "Problem is, that's accusing me as a pedophilia predator which is not a term to be thrown around loosely. You've just doubled your detention."
The principal left the boys and Cartman huffed. "Kenny, switch with me. I'll take your one detention you take my two."
"No fucking way, dude."
"I'll give you my OnlyFans password."
Kenny's brows peaked in interest, thinking off as he wondered. It could fulfill some of his more lusty desires. But, he kinda didn't want to give Cartman that satisfaction a lot more. "Nah."
"Goddammit!"
"Hey, guys." Craig said as he, Tolkien, and Tweek came to take their seats. "Laser tag tomorrow?"
"No way, dude," Stan said. "We're going to see Avatar 2."
"Ew."
"And then make fun of it after," Kyle said. "Any sequel made over eleven years later is a shot in the dark."
Stan cracked open his lemon-lime soda. "James Cameron is overrated."
"Shut up, dude." Kenny protested.
Stan barked a laugh through his drink. "You can't be serious, Kenny."
"The Terminator?" Kenny listed, looking around at the blank stares. "Aliens-?"
"Fellas! Fellas!" The usual tune of Butters busted out, racing over to their table in a breathy run.
"What, Butters." Kyle said.
"Tommy the third-grader, says that his fifth-grade brother told him, that some new kid fifth-grader was walking around in a dark robe today."
The boys showed no interest. "So?" Stan inquired.
"So, my dad says that people like that try to sell you funny stuff in a plastic baggy. Stuff that makes you think you can become Jesus, but it's all just an illusion."
Cartman dipped his fry into ketchup. "Or, it's just another one of those Harry Potter kids."
"Or a Jedi," Butters pondered. "It must be a Jedi."
Kenny took a bite into his baloney sandwich. "I've got Uno cards for detention, Cartman."
"Kewl."
In the empty lot of the school's front yard, Kenny waited against the flagpole with an irritable huff. Mackey was holding detention in the library that day but he spent most of the time in the break room anyway. After returning and scolding Eric for being too loud, Cartman had a few choice words back that scored him an extra twenty minutes after everyone was released. Kenny waited for his walking partner, looking over when the school doors opened and an angry Cartman shuffled up to him, mumbling profanity under his breath. He wasn't Kenny's first choice of a walking partner, but at least he had more patience for Cartman than Stan or Kyle did.
"I'm not waiting for you next time," Kenny said, beginning their walk as Cartman followed him onto the sidewalk.
"Fine, then you don't get my OnlyFans."
"I don't want your OnlyFans." Kenny said. "And it's your fault we got detention."
"Nuh-uh!" Cartman complained. "If you kept that big, ugly laugh under control, Garrison wouldn't have noticed."
Kenny didn't care, he somehow had the secret to putting up with Cartman. "If you stopped throwing paper at my face.."
Cartman grumbled, crossing an open intersection with Kenny. "Wait, wait. I'm not taking the long way home. I'm cutting through Main street."
"This is my way, dude."
"Yeah, cuz you live across the tracks like some bohemian." Cartman said as they passed by a Seven-Eleven. "I'm at least getting a slushie."
"Dude, I just had to wait twenty minutes for you." Kenny turned around holding out angry arms. Cartman's antics had reached their limit today. "My parents are gonna kill me for getting detention, I can't waste more time."
"Oh screw you, Kenny. I'm getting a slushie." Cartman cut into the gas station, heading to the glass doors as he turned around. "I'd get you one but you have no money to pay me back."
"Fuck you!" Kenny called as Cartman headed inside. The hooded boy shrugged his backpack higher and continued on his walk home. There was no late bus for kids who had detention but it wasn't that big a deal. Kenny liked the walk. When Cartman was on his tail though, he never stopped complaining. He might as well leave the jackass to his treat and gain some serenity walking by himself. The movie would be more tolerable tomorrow with Stan and Kyle there to back him up.
Not a bad Friday in all. The weekend couldn't come fast enough, though. Luckily, Kenny hadn't had many 'accidents' with his special gift lately, so this weekend was looking bright. Like the universe was giving him a mental break.
Kenny jaywalked an empty street. Yeah, detention was a bust. The joke was funny, but it wasn't funny enough to earn two hours' worth of detention with Cartman. Maybe if PC learned to chill once and a while. But, he's had worse days. Nothing could make today that much-
A speeding truck sent Kenny flying across the pavement.
To be continued...