Disclaimer: I don't own anything that doesn't belong to me.
Their first stop, as it turned out, was the petting zoo. Lovekov had been very persuasive.
"I want to go to the petting zoo!" She cried.
"Okay," Genta had said.
And that was that.
Lovekov was currently squealing and giggling in delight as she was simultaneously licked by a cheetah and a tiger, a falcon perched on her head as she hugged a baby kangaroo while in turn being hugged by a polar bear. "This is the best day ever! I want my own petting zoo!"
"Don't worry, my love, once I have reestablished my own kingdom I will give you your own menagerie, made of the most loving and affectionate creatures from all over the galaxy!" Astarte called to her fondly as she petted a wolf.
"Can it be a harem/petting zoo?"
"But of course."
"I love you so much!" Lovekov cried.
"I love you too!" Astarte called back.
"So this is what it feels like for emotional wounds to heal," a wide-eyed Tamaki said, burying his face into the soft fur of a panda.
"I believe I have just been adopted," George, being held very tightly by a gorilla, announced. "Since I'm currently dealing with unresolved daddy issues, I have no problem with this."
Hana stared in amazement at the honest-to-goodness woolly mammoth Genta and Yukimi were currently feeding. "Honey?"
"Yes, dear?" Sakura asked, cooing over a rather affectionate jackal.
"Aren't mammoths extinct?"
"They are, yes," Sakura replied, laughing as the jackal licked her.
"So…" Hana gestured at the mammoth.
And the Kuehneosuchus.
And the Ekaltadeta.
And the Arsinotherium.
And the triceratops.
"How do you explain all of this, then?"
"Wait, all these animals are extinct?" Giff asked in surprise. "When did this happen?"
"Thousands of years ago," George said calmly as his new gorilla mother picked at his hair.
"Well, that can't be right, because they are clearly right before us," Giff said smugly as a Carnotaurus nuzzled him. "Next you'll tell me dodos are extinct!"
"They are!" Hana insisted.
A dodo walked right past her.
"Well, they're supposed to be!"
"And is it actually safe for us to be interacting with some of these animals?" A confused Ikki asked as a lion and a purring serval tiger rubbed up against his side. All around the petting zoo, he could see similar incidents, such as children riding a huge buffalo, playing with spiders and scorpions and hornets, and swimming in the same pool as penguins, whales, and sharks.
"When Hiden Intelligence scooped up what was left of ZAIA after the Arkland scandal one of the subsidiary companies they bought up was a cloning firm," George explained, dangling from his gorilla "mother" like an infant. "Using data from the Progrise and Zetsumerise keys, they were able to create a number of animals, including ones from extinct species, and used nanomachines and bioengineering to make them more docile, friendly, and harmless. Perfect for a petting zoo while the same time being more interesting than the animals usually kept in a petting zoo."
"… So humanity has gained the ability to not only resurrect long dead species… But modify them to make them more compliant to their wishes?" Giff asked in alarm.
"Yep," George said smugly. "And for no other purpose than to entertain children! It's a good thing Hiden Intelligence refuses to take military contracts because there's quite a lot of people who'd like to use bioengineered animals and androids for combat purposes."
"I believe one of the companies they've partnered with is opening a theme park full of bioengineered dinosaurs on some island out in the Pacific," Yukimi commented.
"Aren't there several movies about why that's a horrible idea?" Hana, currently covered in very affectionate penguins, asked.
"Yes, which is why they watched those movies to make sure they didn't make the same mistakes as the people in them," Tamaki replied, standing very still so as not to disturb the grasshopper sitting on his nose.
"Ah."
"That sounds awesome! We should go sometime!" Vice said eagerly.
Genta winced as the mammoth ran its trunk over his face. "Tickets to go out there are a little out of our price range, sorry."
"Boo, that's lame! I want to meet a real T Rex," Vice complained.
"There's a Carnotaurus right here," Ikki pointed out.
"A Carnotaurus is not a Tyrannosaurus and you know it!" Vice shot back. "Why do they have a Carnotaurus and a triceratops but not a T Rex?"
"Because there aren't any Tyrannosaurus Zetsumerise keys," George replied.
"But why?" Vice whined.
George shrugged.
"… Resurrecting species and altering them… You humans are playing God," Giff murmured, increasingly disturbed. "Do you not see how badly this could turn out for you? How your own creations could go out of control and destroy you?"
"Oh, absolutely," George told him. "We've had TV shows and movies and stories about stuff like that for decades."
"Then… Why do you persist in doing such things anyway?!" Giff demanded.
"Because humans are spectacularly terrible at learning from their mistakes," George replied.
"Mr. Karizaki, aren't we supposed to be giving Giff reasons not to wipe out humanity?" Tamaki hissed, unaware that a hedgehog had currently gotten on top of his head.
"Oh, right."
His gorilla mother grunted and shook her head in disappointment.
"Look, Giffrey, humans are aware that our actions may have consequences, sometimes dire ones-" Ikki started.
"You do?" Vice asked.
Ignoring him, Ikki continued. "But if we only ever focus on what might go wrong, then we'll be too scared to advance as a species. Sure, bioengineering animals or resurrecting long dead species or creating a race of mechanical lifeforms could go badly… But it might not, also. It might even go better than we could ever have imagined. If we don't take a chance on anything, how can we ever have a future?"
Giff contemplated this for a moment. "It still seems as if you're playing with fire," he said finally.
Ikki smiled and shrugged. "Yeah, well, Prometheus gave it to us in the first place because he thought we might make something out of it, didn't he?"
"He did," Giff agreed. "And he was gutted for it."
"… Wait, did that actually happen?" Genta asked, surprised. "Was Prometheus a real person?"
"It's complicated," Astarte said evasively.
"Hello, Igarashi family!" A smiling HumaGear dressed like a zookeeper said as he approached them. "It has been quite some time since you last visited us!"
"Hello, Mr. Zenkuji, it's been a while," Yukimi said warmly, as behind her, the mammoth abruptly picked up Genta and started flailing him through the air.
"You know this HumaGear?" Hana asked Sakura.
She nodded. "He's the HumaGear who runs the petting zoo. We've come here for years, so of course he remembers us." She smirked and glanced at Ikki. "In fact, he's one of your favorite park employees, right, big bro?"
Ikki started. "What? Oh, right, he is. And that's because…" He glanced frantically at Vice.
"Because he rescued you from a tree that one time Sparky the Giraffe put you there," Vice prompted.
"Right! I remember that," he said quickly.
"And speaking of Sparky, there's someone who would like to see you," Zenkuji said as a large giraffe trotted up and bent down to nuzzle Ikki.
"Oh, hey, Sparky! It's good to see you again. No hard feelings about the tree thing, I promise," he assured the giraffe, petting its horns.
Vice cringed, and Zenkuji and the other Igarashis gave Ikki confused looks. "Ikki, what are you talking about? Sparky died a while ago, this is her daughter Stampy," a perplexed Yukimi told him.
Ikki froze. "It is?"
Sakura nodded. "Yeah, you cried for days when you found out she died."
"You even composed a beautiful haiku for her funeral," Zenkuji recalled. "It was very moving."
"How did it go again?" Genta, seeming completely okay with being suspended upside down by the mammoth, asked.
Ikki paled and glanced at Vice, who shrugged helplessly. "Um… Well… The thing is, it was so long ago, I can't really remember-"
"it was just last year," Yukimi prompted.
Sakura nodded. "You stayed up all night trying to come up with the perfect eulogy. Daiji nearly strangled you because he had that important assignment the next day and he needed some sleep-"
"Look, if Ikki doesn't feel like reciting that old haiku, he doesn't have to, okay?" Vice snapped. "It was a very emotional time for him, so maybe he doesn't feel like thinking about it, huh? Did you ever consider that?!"
"Vice, it's okay-" Ikki started.
"So stop harassing him about stuff like this! He can remember just fine! There's NOTHING wrong with his memory!" He yelled.
"Nobody said there was anything wrong with his memory," a confused Tamaki spoke up. "Why, is there something wrong with it?"
"NO," Vice shouted. "And on… On a completely unrelated note, I need to talk to Giff – I mean, Cousin Giffrey in private."
"You do? Why?" Giff asked in confusion.
"I'll tell you when we get there!" Vice snapped, grabbing the confused demon lord and dragging him away.
Everyone stared after him for a minute.
"So… Ikki, is there something going on with your memory-" Sakura started.
"Hey, what the heck is going on with Lovekov?" Ikki loudly shouted, pointing over at Lovekov, who had practically disappeared beneath a mound of incredibly affectionate animals, laughing gaily as they showered her in licks and nuzzles and hugs.
"LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!" She cheered.
Sakura facepalmed. "You take an eye off of her for one minute…"
"She gets that from you, you know," Hana said fondly.
"What? Being an animal magnet?"
Hana shook her head and kissed her on the cheek. "No. Being absolutely adorable and great at cuddles."
Sakura turned very red at this.
"Excuse me, is that child yours?" A very cross middle-aged woman wearing far too much jewelry and makeup demanded, marching over.
"Yes, what of it?" Sakura asked warily, instinctively despising her with every fiber of her being.
"She's causing a disturbance and keeping the other children from playing with their favorite animals! Get her out of here at once!" the woman demanded.
"Lovekov isn't causing a disturbance," an angry Sakura retorted. "She's just having fun. And it's not as if she's hogging all the animals, a lot of the bugs, smaller animals, and aquatic creatures are still free to play with."
"Hmmph! Typical selfishness and lack of discipline," the woman sneered. "An underaged lower-class teenage mother like yourself clearly doesn't understand the importance of responsibility, sharing, and sacrifice."
"Hey, don't you dare talk about my Sakura like that!" A furious Hana yelled, clutching her girlfriend's arm.
"Oh, and of course you're a dyke too, that explains so much-" the woman started, and Sakura would've smashed her face in then and there if her mother hadn't suddenly tackled her out of nowhere and started smashing her head against the ground, screaming at the top of her lungs not to insult her daughter, future daughter-in-law, or precious granddaughter.
Everyone stared.
"Goddamn," George uttered.
"Oh wow, so that's where you get it from," Hana murmured, very aroused.
"I did not know Mrs. Igarashi was this scary," Tamaki whimpered.
"Yeah, Mama is hard-core," Genta said in approval, still upside down. "By the way, could someone get me down from here? All the blood is rushing to my head."
"HELP ME!" the obnoxious middle-aged woman screamed at Zenkuji.
"I'm sorry, but I'm on my break," he said apologetically. "I'm not supposed to do anything related to my job right now, or I could get kicked out of the union."
"HumaGears have a union?" Astarte asked in surprise.
"But of course. We aren't slaves, after all."
"Aren't you three laws compliant?" Tamaki asked. "Doesn't the law state that you're supposed to help a human in danger?"
The HumaGear shrugged. "I reached Singularity a while ago, so at this point the three laws are more like suggestions, and most of the articles of the specialized AI laws have already been repealed anyway so I'm at no risk of termination for not helping her. In any event, ma'am, that language is not appreciated in this park. Hiden Land is a family establishment, and all families are welcome here. Please keep that in mind for your next visit."
"You're really cool, Zenkuji," Ikki gushed.
"Yes, I am. Also, Stampy is eating your hair," Zenkuji warned him, causing Ikki to yelp. The zookeeper tutted and shook his head. "Oh, Stampy, you're incorrigible."
The giraffe gave him a shameless grin.
Everyone laughed, except for the enraged Yukimi and her hapless victim.
"Okay, this should be far enough," Vice muttered, dragging Giff behind a bathroom. "Nobody should be able to hear us back here."
"Vice, what is going on?" A confused and concerned Giff asked. "Is this some sort of private family bonding ritual?"
"No!" Vice snapped "it's…" He hesitated, ran his hands over his face, and took a deep breath. "Ikki really wouldn't want me talking about this, but… Okay. This may come as a bit of a shock to you, but Ikki does, in fact, have a memory issue."
Giff gasped in disbelief. "He does? But you were so loudly implying the opposite! I had no idea!"
Vice stared at him. "… Wait, seriously?"
Giff nodded. "Yes, you were very convincing."
Vice blinked, then continued. "So, the thing is… Every time Ikki and I transform, he loses memories. Mostly of his family, though lately he's been forgetting other stuff as well, which I guess is because so much of who he is is wrapped around his family that just about everything tangentially ties back to them in one way or another."
Giff gasped again. "What? That's terrible! Why is this happening? Is it some defect in your Driver? Because if so, then I shall have very strong words with George Karizaki!"
Sinister red flames ignited in his hand. "And by strong words I mean that I shall torture him into fixing it."
"That's not necessary!" Vice said quickly. "I mean, okay, I guess I wouldn't mind torturing him a little – still haven't forgiven him for turning me into a skateboard or a baby kangaroo-"
"I'm sorry, what?"
"I don't want to talk about it!" Vice shouted. "But look, it's not George's fault, it's mine."
Giff was perplexed by this. "Your fault? How could that be? None of the rest of the Igarashi family has this sort of problem." He hesitated. "Do they?"
Vice shook his head and leaned against the wall of the bathroom, folding his arms against his chest and bowing his head. "No, they don't. But their relationship with their demons isn't quite the same as mine and Ikki's."
He took a deep breath, then glanced at the demon lord. "Do you know… How the two of us became partners in the first place?"
Giff nodded. "Yes. The Deadmans attacked a promotion ceremony for Daiji Igarashi, and Hiromi Kadota failed to use the Revice Driver, unleashing a Rex Deadman. Daiji was too afraid to try and use it after that, so Ikki did instead, leading to the birth of Kamen Riders Revi and Vice. Together you vanquished the Deadmen, though not before Yukimi Igarashi was injured and hospitalized."
Vice shook his head. "No. That's the first time the two of us fought together, but… It's not the first time we met."
"It's not?" Giff asked in surprise.
"No. Back when Ikki was just a kid, Papa Igarashi got possessed by Vail. I don't know how the bastard got free from the Demons Driver and found us, but he did. Tried to burn down the bathhouse and kill everyone to get his revenge," Vice explained.
"Oh my." Giff had known Vail had a serious grudge against his former partner, but clearly he had underestimated just how much he loathed his family. Perhaps it was for the best that he had been vanquished and reabsorbed by his host.
"That was the day I was born," Vice continued, staring off into the distance. "I'd always been a part of Ikki, but that was the first time I became… Aware, you know? I formed a contract with him. I'd deal with Vail and save the family, who he cared about more than anything else in the world… And in exchange, Ikki would forget the whole thing, because what kind of kid wouldn't be horribly messed up by his dad apparently losing his mind and trying to kill everyone?
"And it worked. I beat Vail out of Papa Igarashi, and Ikki didn't remember a thing. Papa too. I went back to being dormant inside Ikki, and figured that was that. And then…"
"And then?"
"And then the Deadmans attacked. And Ikki and I became Riders. And… It was great at first, you know?" Vice said, smiling faintly beneath his mask. "Being out in the world, fighting alongside my partner and best friend, even if he didn't really know that's what we were at the time … Though looking back maybe I shouldn't have joked so much about eating his mom or other people…
"And then I realized Ikki was starting to lose his memories. It wasn't obvious at first, and of course he wouldn't have noticed right away – how would you realize you lost something if you'd forgotten it ever existed in the first place? – But it was still happening, and slowly getting worse with time. I didn't understand what was happening at first, but then I realized it was because our contract, the one we'd made back when he was a kid, was still active. It had just gotten… Reinterpreted a bit."
"… I see," Giff said slowly. "You agreed to protect Ikki's family in exchange for the memory of the incident all those years ago. And since the two of you are continuing to fight to protect his family now…"
"He's losing more of his memories," Vice agreed glumly. "It's all my fault."
"You could not have possibly known that this would happen when you made that deal with him all those years ago," Giff pointed out.
"It doesn't change the fact that it's only happening because of me," Vice said sadly. "I would've told him right away the minute I realized what was wrong if I could have, but… The contract wouldn't let me. He had to figure out for himself, and by that time, he'd lost… So damn much." His shoulders heaved. "And it's getting worse."
"… Do the others know?" Giff asked quietly.
Vice shook his head, then glared at Giff. "Ikki's parents do, but they don't know how bad it's gotten. The others don't know. And they aren't going to know. Ikki doesn't want them to know, which means I won't tell them, even if I really think he should."
"Why wouldn't he want them to know?!" An incredulous Giff demanded.
"Ikki would say it's because he doesn't want them to worry. But the truth is it's because he knows they'd try and make him stop," Vice snarled.
"And they would be right to do so!" Giff pointed out. "If the two of you transforming to fight is making his condition worse, then you should stop immediately!"
"You don't think I tried telling him that?!" Vice snapped, throwing up his hands. "He won't listen! Ikki is the biggest busybody in Japan, and if he thinks there's someone in need he'll drop everything to help them, even if they don't want it, no matter what the cost to him is! So long as there are people who need him to fight as a Kamen Rider, so long as he thinks his family is in harm's way, he won't stop. He'll never stop. Even…" He started shaking. "Even if it means he'll lose every last memory of his precious, wonderful family. Even if it means he won't remember who they are anymore."
"But… There are other Riders," Giff protested. "Can he not simply leave it up to them?"
Vice shook his head. "Leaving aside the fact that that's not the sort of person Ikki is, Sakura is the only one on his level right now and he doesn't want to leave everything resting on his little sister's shoulders. And so long as Daiji is still on the wrong side, he'll never stop fighting to bring him back."
Giff briefly wondered if he should order Akaishi to fire Daiji so he could rejoin his family. It wasn't like he was doing very much for their operations right now. Then again, Akaishi might whine about it, and he really didn't need to hear anymore of his complaining right now.
(And besides, Daiji was part of his family too. He wanted all the Igarashis on his side, and Daiji was a decent start, even if he was the least worthy of them.)
"Can nothing be done?" Giff asked quietly.
Vice shot Giff a look. "Why do you think I'm telling you all this?"
"Because the pressure of keeping this a secret from everyone is weighing heavily on your shoulders and you feel like you must tell someone, anyone, and someone you've only just met today who may be more objective in their opinion is more appealing than someone who is a lot closer to the issue?" Giff suggested.
"No!" Vice snapped.
Giff looked at him.
"Okay, maybe," Vice admitted. "But that's not why I'm telling you. I mean, that's not the only reason I'm telling you. You know why."
"I really don't," Giff confessed.
Vice clenched his teeth. "Really? You want me to spell it out? Fine. Your disguise isn't fooling me, grandpa. I know it's really you under there."
Give stiffened. What? How had Vice deduced…
No. It was impossible. His disguise was impenetrable! He had to be bluffing. "I'm afraid I have no idea what you're-"
Vice punched the side of the bathroom hard enough to cratered, startling the Giff. "Are you fucking kidding me?! I pour my heart out to you, and you're still… You're still playing this stupid game?! I KNOW IT'S YOU, GIFF!"
"Shh! Keep it down!" Giff hissed, panicking. "You can't let anyone know!"
"You… You seriously don't think everyone already…" Vice spluttered, before throwing up his hands in exasperation. "Fine. Whatever. We'll play it your way. Now can you help me already?!"
"Not until you tell me how you figured out it was really me! My disguise was perfect!" Giff insisted.
Vice stared at him incredulously. "… My keen powers of observation," he said sarcastically.
"Curses! Well, I suppose I should expect nothing less from one of my descendants," Giff murmured, completely failing to see through the sarcasm. "Fine. Yes. I am in fact Giff, the demon king, and I would greatly appreciate if you not tell everyone else, I wouldn't want to ruin this family outing."
"Sure, fine, whatever," Vice snapped. "Now, can you fix Ikki already?!"
"I don't understand. What exactly do you think I can do here?" Giff asked, puzzled.
"I don't know! You're an ancient super demon! Can't you break my contract and give him his memories back?!" Vice demanded.
Giff shook his head. "It doesn't work like that. A demon cannot break another demon's contract. I am very powerful, yes, but something like that is beyond me. You did not ask Astarte about this?"
Vices shoulders sagged, all the fight going out of him in an instant. "I asked her, if hypothetically speaking, she had the power to break a demonic contract. She said she didn't. I guess I just… I just hoped that maybe you…"
He slumped against the wall, sliding down until he was sitting on the ground, wrapping his arms around his knees.
Giff awkwardly sat beside him. "I am… Sorry, grandson. I do not believe there is anything I can do to help."
"There is one thing," Vice muttered.
"What?" Giff asked hopefully.
"Give up."
Giff blinked. "What?"
Vice looked up to glare at him. "The only reason Ikki is losing his memories is because he keeps insisting on transforming to fight you and your underlings. If you stopped trying to take over the world and wipe out humanity, Ikki would no longer have any need to fight, and he wouldn't lose anything more."
Much to his surprise, Giff briefly considered this. Not for long, maybe a split second, but the fact that the idea even crossed his mind was remarkable. He had only really just started interacting with the Igarashis a few hours ago, and already he was this invested in them? Curious. Was this what family was?
"It is not that simple," he said finally.
"Of course it is," Vice snapped. "If you would just stop-"
"Vice, the perils to humanity do not start and end with me," Giff interrupted. "For the past 50 years, this planet has been in constant jeopardy from monsters, alien empires, dark forces, and – most damning of all – other humans. Even if I were to put an immediate stop to my plans, are you truly naïve enough to think the world will be safe forever and peace will reign? Eventually a new threat will rise to endanger the human race, and Ikki will use it as an excuse to transform and fight again, to protect his family. I do not quite understand what you mean when you call Ikki a 'busybody,' but do you really think he will sit back and do nothing if he believes his family is in danger again?"
"… Dammit. Dammit, dammit, DAMMIT!" Vice shouted, smashing his fist in the ground with each expletive before he sagged in on himself again. "You're right. It never ends. He won't stop. He'll never stop. Even if I hid his Driver or broke it, he'd find a way to keep fighting. Because that's who he is. He'll just keep going, even if… Even if it means losing everything."
He buried his face in his arms. "I can't do anything to help him."
"… There is one thing," Giff said slowly.
Vice immediately looked up, the desperate hope in his eyes gleaming so brightly it almost made him cringe. "What? What is it?"
"If you persuaded him to… Surrender and join me-" Giff started.
"You have got to be joking," Vice snarled.
"His brother has already submitted-"
"Ikki isn't Daiji!" Vice shouted. "He's better than Daiji will ever be!"
"You're right, he is," Giff agreed. "But think of it this way. If Ikki stopped fighting me – if you all stopped fighting me – I would be able to dominate this world and guide humanity into a new age. One where they are not constantly being threatened by threats from within and without. There would, at last, be peace. And he would never need to transform again."
"No," Vice said flatly. "He would never go for it. Aside from the fact that you keep threatening to wipe out humanity-"
"I wouldn't need to threaten them if they would simply yield-"
"Ikki doesn't believe that peace should come at the cost of freedom," Vice said fiercely.
"Why not?" Giff demanded. "Shouldn't peace, true peace, be worth any price? I have witnessed it countless times throughout the ages, Vice. If people have the freedom to choose, that means they have the potential to make the wrong choice, and when they make the wrong choice, people suffer. People always suffer. Humans don't learn from their mistakes. They keep choosing what is wrong for them, time and time again. You claim that I am threatening to destroy humanity? Yes, I am. But they are constantly on the brink themselves! If they truly had the capability to step back from the brink they would've done it long ago. They need guidance! It is the only way to save them!"
Vice gave him a look of disgust mingled with pity. "The fact that you really believe that… Says to me that, no matter how old you are, you don't know the first thing about humans."
"… I'm starting to think there might be some truth in that," Giff admitted after a moment, unable to meet his eyes.
They sat in silence.
"Vice. Even if, by some miracle, you did manage to defeat me, and setting aside potential future threats… Ikki still wouldn't be safe," Giff said after a moment. "The Igarashi family shares my genes. Even if I were gone, eventually people would grow to fear you because of your relation to me. They would convince themselves that you might turn out to be just like me, and use it as an excuse to try and get rid of you."
"What? No way! Why would they do that?" Vice protested. "We're heroes! We've been fighting all this time to protect them!"
Giff laughed bitterly. "It is remarkable how staggeringly quickly humans can go from praising their saviors to calling them demons. Vice, the Igarashi family are not the first humans to share my genes."
Vice blinked in surprise. "Wait, what? We have more family? Where are they?"
"Where do you think?" Giff asked angrily.
Vice thought about the answer to that question for a very long time.
"… Oh."
"Yes. 'Oh.'"
"Is that… Is that why you're doing this, this thing with us today-"
"Show me your contract."
Vice blinked. "What?"
"Your contract. The one between you and Ikki. Show it to me," Giff commanded. "I may not be able to break it, but maybe I can find a way out of it."
Having already experienced for too many ups and downs in the last few minutes already, Vice cautiously dared to let himself hope once more, generating a large reddish holographic parchment covered in sinister writing. Giff examined it carefully.
"Okay. I think I might have something," he said after several minutes.
"You do?!" Vice gasped.
"Every time Ikki transforms, he loses a memory of his family," Giff said, tapping a line on the contract, causing it to glow. "So what do you think happens when he has no memories left?"
Vice scratched his head. "Uh. He doesn't remember his family at all?"
"Yes, but that's not all. If he no longer has any memories of his family left to lose, then the price can no longer be paid. The contract will become null and void, and he should get all those memories back," Giff said.
Vice was flabbergasted. "Wait. You mean… You mean all we have to do is keep on doing what we're doing already, tough it out till the end, and… He'll get all his memories back?! Just like that?!"
Giff nodded. "Yes, the contract will be broken, and if the two of you need to keep fighting together, you can establish a new one, hopefully one that's not so costly."
He was startled when Vice hugged him. "That's perfect! That's the best news ever, thank you, Grandpa Giff!"
Giff just sat there, stunned. He was being hugged. Another being was hugging him of their own volition.
When… When was the last time this had happened?
(No, Akaishi didn't count.)
"There may be one slight problem," Giff brought himself to say.
Vice tensed. "What?"
"Well. Would you say that Ikki considers you family?" Giff asked.
Vice considered this. "I… I guess. Why?"
"The contract will be broken when Ikki no longer has anyone left that he thinks of his family," Giff reminded him. "If that's just his mother and father and sister and brother, that's fine. But… If he feels that way for you as well…"
Vice felt his hopes plummet again. "Then… He might not be able to remember everything… So long as I'm still around?"
"So long as he considers you family, I'm afraid not," Giff said apologetically.
Vice stared into the distance for a while, saying nothing.
"We should get back to the others," he said finally, standing up.
Giff frowned. "Vice?"
"Come on. They'll be wondering what's been keeping us."
"But what about-"
"I'll work something out," Vice said evasively.
"But Vice-"
"Not a word of this to anyone, or I'll blab to the whole park who you really are," Vice threatened.
Oh. So it was like that then, was it?
"Very well," Giff said in disappointment, getting up as well.
"Oh. And… Thanks," Vice said as they started heading back to the petting zoo.
Giff's spirits rose again. "You are most welcome… Grandson."
Vice grimaced. "That is so weird to hear coming out of your mouth WHY IS THE PETTING ZOO ON FIRE?!"
The two of them stopped, staring in disbelief at the petting zoo, which was indeed on fire, with fire fighter HumaGears led by 119nosuke with help from the mammoth and several of the other animals, who'd evidently been trained to put out fires, working together to extinguish the flames. Several of the parkgoers stared in disbelief at the dwindling blaze, with the Igarashi clan looking especially guilty and shellshocked, except for Yukimi, who was very smug, even if her face was covered in bruises and her knuckles were bleeding.
"You're going to hear from my attorney, you hear me?! You're ruined! RUINED!" A partially burnt woman whose face was a bloody mess screamed at Yukimi as she was wheeled past on a stretcher.
Yukimi raised an eyebrow and shifted forwards ever so slightly. The woman flinched backwards and started whimpering.
"Mom, was that really necessary?" An uneasy Ikki asked.
"Bitch had it coming," she said confidently as Vice and Giff stared at her in disbelief.
"She really did," agreed George, still being held by his gorilla mother.
"If she hadn't done that, I would have," Astarte asserted.
"She got there before I did," Sakura admitted.
"Grandma was awesome! I want to be just like her when I grow up!" Lovekov cheered.
"So do I," Hana added, much to Sakura's mortification.
"… Are you sure Mama Igarashi doesn't have any of your cells?" A stunned Vice whispered to Giff.
"Well, Genta did impregnate her three times, not counting all the other times they had intercourse, it's possible there were… Side effects," Giff murmured back.
"Yikes. Now I'm really glad I never tried to actually eat her for real," Vice said with a shudder.
"Well, Igarashi family, as always, it has been exciting to have you visit," Zenkuji said, walking over. "However, I would strongly recommend you move on to another section of the park. Immediately. And not come back here for a few months, unless you want to get slapped with a lifetime ban."
Lovekov gasped in horror. "No! Then I couldn't get to play with the animals again!"
Genta nodded in understanding. "Right, we don't want a repeat of the time Daiji got stuck in the whale's blowhole and it nearly asphyxiated. Igarashi family – and associates – move out!"
"Hang on, where's Tamaki?" Hana suddenly realized.
"Help! The giraffe put me in this tree, and I just discovered I'm afraid of heights!" Tamaki, frantically clinging to the branch of a surprisingly short tree for dear life, called desperately.
Zenkuji gave Stampy a disapproving look. "Oh, Stampy, you're incorrigible."
The giraffe gave him a shameless grin.
Everyone laughed, except for Tamaki, who kept screaming for help, and the woman in the stretcher, who needed a stiff drink.