Preface
Last Name...
Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at /works/38268955.
by SleepyBikerPoptropican
Summary
Amelia and Octavian hang out on Home Island, and talk about last names. That's it, that's it really. Also MVB wants lion merch.Notes
See the end of the work for notes
Last Name...
Just another beautiful day on Home Island. Amelia is selling outfits in her shop, and Octavian is mopping the floor. Yes, he works there, although you never see him. He needs to do something good with his life, as punishment for his past crimes against humanity.
A customer was just paying for their new outfit. "Thank you so much, Amelia… um, Amelia…"
"You're welcome! Come again!" said Amelia with that same smile she always wears.
"Um, Amelia? What's your last name?" asked the customer.
Amelia frowned. "My name? My… last name?"
"Yeah. What is it?"
"Oh, yeah… it's…" she knew the answer, in the back of her mind. But she was not allowed to say it outloud.
Instead, she just forced a laugh. "I guess I don't have one! Strange, huh?"
The customer gave a confused look, then walked out.
Octavian had overheard the whole thing, and he put his wet mop in her face. "Ew! What was that for?" Amelia said, spitting.
"Why didn't you tell her your surname? You know what it is. Just say it."
Amelia shrugged. "It's complicated. I'm not programmed to say it."
He rolled his eyes. "You can't even be honest about who you are… pathetic."
Amelia got mad. "Yeah, well, what about you? I've never heard you say your last name before! What is it then?"
"Well, that's easy. It's…" At this moment Octavian remembered he had no surname either.
Amelia crossed her arms. "Exactly."
"Well, it's not exactly my fault. I was raised in a cult." he said.
"You know, the more you tell me about your former cult life, the more upset I get."
"Fine. I won't talk about it anymore." he finished mopping, while Amelia watched him. Finally, she asked, "Does your lady friend Paullene have a last name?"
"Her name is Paulla . And yes, as a matter of fact, she does. Her last name is-" At this moment the door to the shop opened, and in stepped Survival Island's villain Myron Van Buren as his butler held open the door. "Good day, Miss," he said to Amelia.
"Hello, MVB. I don't have any lion themed clothing for you this time, unfortunately. Maybe next time?" said Amelia.
Van Buren looked very upset, but he nodded. "Alright, I'll be back next week. But if you don't have any lion-themed clothing for me, you just might regret it." he moved to leave, but Amelia stopped him.
"Wait! Van Buren! I was wondering, what's your butler's last name?" Amelia asked. Winston was standing by the door, and he couldn't hear them.
MVB was going to answer, but he stopped. "Hm. You know, that is a very good question, dear. A very good question indeed."
Octavian rolled his eyes, and continued mopping.
Afterword
End Notes
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