DESTINY - CHAPTER 20

Rex's stomach growled as he performed another sequence of strikes and blocks against an imaginary opponent. He'd opted to skip the evening meal to avoid running into Ahsoka. He hadn't worked up the courage to tell her that tomorrow morning when he left for Cornu Copiae, he wouldn't be returning with the crew to Axalon.

He dodged and spun past another set of crates he'd stacked around the storage building to represent droids and other enemies. He struck and parried with the twin wooden dowels he'd fashioned into fighting batons, just as General Skywalker had taught him. He'd been at it for a while and the boxes were beginning to splinter and crack under his onslaught, a testament to the frustrated tension coiled in his body.

Halfway through a kata Rex caught a glimpse of Ahsoka standing just inside the storage building door. She must have been standing there watching him for a while. He chastised himself for surrendering his situational awareness to the churning anxiety that currently drove his body. But he continued, following through with the sequence until its completion.

Taking a moment, he feigned to catch his breath, when he was actually gathering his resolve to speak with her. Still gripping the batons, he reached up with one arm and wiped the sweat from his brow with the sleeve of his blacks.

During those few seconds Ahsoka had stepped closer, to where only a few feet separated them. But the distance between them might as well have been a parsec.

Finally, he allowed his eyes to look into hers. "Ahsoka," he said.

"Rex," she replied.

A thundering silence of unspoken words stretched between them.

"I wanted-" she said.

"Tomorrow, I-" he stammered, speaking over her.

They both froze, waiting for the other to continue.

"You go ahead," Rex said, his muscles vibrating with anticipation. She wanted something. He hoped she wanted him to stay.

Ahsoka shifted her weight to one foot and wrapped her arms around her waist. "I wanted to know if you've made a decision about staying or leaving."

The last flicker of hope in Rex's chest sputtered and died. He swallowed, then simply said, "I'll be leaving."

He watched as Ahsoka made no attempt to hide the disappointment that crossed her features. She glanced down for a moment, then brought her eyes back to his.

"I'll have Manami prepare a kit," Ahsoka said. "Supplies, clothes, credits, new ID, whatever you need."

"You don't have to go to that trouble on my account," he said.

Ahsoka just scowled at him and rolled her eyes.

An uncomfortable silence stretched out between them. Finally, Ahsoka said, "Clan members will be sad to see you go, but they'll understand and be supportive." Then her expression grew pensive. "But T'annon …"

Ahsoka didn't finish her sentence and Rex knew why. She didn't want to make him feel guilty because she knew, as did he, that T'annon would take Rex's leaving very, very hard.

"I've been thinking about telling her," Rex said. "I'm just not sure how."

"I can help if you'd like. I have an idea of how to go about it," Ahsoka said.

Her offer surprised Rex and he let out a sigh of relief. "I'd appreciate the help."

"Let's meet later this evening in my hut. We can spend some quality time with T'annon, just the three of us. You can break it to her then. She'll be sad, but it will be private and safe for her."

"Thank you, Ahsoka."

"I know you care about her. I know this must be hard for you."

Rex just nodded, his throat tight with appreciation for Ahsoka's understanding of his feelings, as well as her protectiveness of T'annon.

Through the Force Ahsoka felt waves of anxiety, followed by relief, roll off Rex at her offer to help him break the news of his leaving to T'annon.

She was surprised at the clarity of his feelings and how strongly they resonated within her. It wasn't unusual for her to sense another's feelings, especially if she purposefully focused on them. But this was different. She hadn't intentionally tried to feel Rex through the Force, but somehow their connection in that moment was stronger than she'd ever experienced with anyone else — even Master Plo Koon.

"Is there anything else you need," Rex asked, pulling her from her thoughts.

Shaking off the emotional overflow Ahsoka pointed at the batons in Rex's hands. "I've been meaning to ask you where you learned Jar'Kai."

Rex's eyebrows shot up and Ahsoka smirked with satisfaction at catching him off guard.

"I saw you fighting inside the shield dome," she said. "It was amazing. You were … incredible."

"I'm proficient," Rex said in a self-depreciating tone.

Ahsoka let out a snort. "That's an understatement. I've observed Jedi masters of Jar'Kai in all seven light saber forms. Even with their use of the Force you'd be a challenge for any of them."

Rex just shrugged.

"Did Anakin Skywalker teach you?" Ahsoka asked.

"Yes."

"I suspected as much. Your style is aggressive. Your technique is offensive, probably form four. That was Master Skywalker's preferred form."

Rex spun the batons in his hands, looking from one to the other. "Yeah," he chuckled, "defense isn't a word in the general's vocabulary."

"I had many opportunities to watch him spar as I was growing up in the temple. He inspired me to master form four as my primary technique."

"Did you also train in Jai'Kar?"

Ahsoka nodded, then said, "It's unusual for a Jedi to train a non-Jedi in light saber combat. Why did he teach you?"

Rex hesitated for a long moment, averting his eyes. Finally he said, "Because I was … broken."

A torrent of grief plowed into Ahsoka through the Force. Her breath hitched as she fought against it, quickly erecting her mental barriers to provide a filter for Rex's feelings. The strength with which she could sense his emotions was confusing, and at the same time, compelling.

Struggling to keep the impact of his feelings from showing on her face Ahsoka asked, "What happened?"

Rex lifted his gaze and stared past her shoulder, his eyes on some distant memory. "I had just been assigned as captain to Skywalker's battalion, the 501st. I … lost a battle. Walked into an ambush. Over a hundred of my brothers were killed. The general blamed it on faulty intelligence." He shook his head. "I didn't see it that way."

Grief welled in Ahsoka's chest and she knew it wasn't his, but her own. "Rex, … I'm so sorry."

He took a long breath. "I wasn't coping very well. The general finally took me to a sparing room and shoved a pair of batons in my hands. A lot like these," he said, raising the batons. "He taught me Jai'Kar.

"But what he really taught me was how to quiet my mind and focus on the moment. How to accept my emotions instead of fighting them. How to meld my thoughts and my feelings and my body so they worked together instead of against each other. In the process, I learned to forgive myself."

Rex focused back on Ahsoka and let out a laugh. "He said I would have made a good Jedi."

Ahsoka smiled. Rex was exactly the type of individual the Jedi needed, even if he wasn't a Force user. He was exactly what the galaxy needed. Strong and steadfast. Smart and intuitive. Gentle and compassionate. He was becoming a warrior for peace. She could see that now. She had no doubt that he was moving toward his destiny.

"So … are you up for a little sparing?" Rex asked.

The question jarred Ahsoka's attention back to the moment. "Probably not a good idea," she said, shrugging him off.

"Afraid I'll kick your shebs?" he said, giving her a grin.

Ahsoka felt her competitiveness rising within her and cursed herself for it. "If there's any ass that gets kicked, it won't be mine."

Rex's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "You've learned some Mando'a?"

"Not a lot. But I'm a quick study. For example, I know that mesh'la doesn't mean 'thank you'."

Ahsoka felt a pulse of satisfaction as Rex's eyes opened even wider while his neck and face blossomed with a darkening blush. In a poorly veiled attempt to hide his embarrassment Rex turned and walked slowly over to a work bench along one wall. He returned a moment later with another pair of wooden dowels shaped into batons identical to his own. He held them out to Ahsoka.

The twinkle in his eye and the smirk on his face was all it took to break Ahsoka's will power. Rex knew her too well. She shucked off her cloak and grabbed the batons. She sliced them through the air and twirled them in her hands to gauge their weight and balance.

Although she'd left the Jedi over a decade ago, Ahsoka had kept refining her light saber skills as much as possible over the years. Living on Axalon had provided her the opportunity to increase her practice. It was easy to trek deep into the forest to a secluded clearing away from prying eyes where she could cut loose with several practice drones for a couple of hours. It wasn't the same as dueling with another Jedi in a temple sparing room, but it had served her well in keeping her skills honed.

"I'll go easy on you," Rex said.

Ahsoka gave him the most wicked grin she could conjure. "That's my line."

Rex led her to a large open space in the middle of the floor. They stopped, about three meters apart. Rex bowed to her and she returned the gesture.

Ahsoka immediately dropped into a fighting stance, the muscle memory from countless hours of training, taking over. It had been a long time since she'd faced off against a living opponent and she relished the feeling of the batons in her hands. Her body began to throb with the eager anticipation of combat — her muscles vibrating, her mind racing. She hadn't realized how much she'd missed the challenge of wielding a blade against a live opponent.

She began to circle to her right, positioning herself at Rex's left, to test his weak side. Rex mimicked her, crouching and circling to his right. She studied his posture, his footwork, how he positioned his batons for both defense and offense.

Rex struck. Feinting with his right hand, he brought the baton in his left across his body toward her ribs, lightning fast. Ahsoka saw it coming, but even then, she barely managed to block the blow.

The crack of their batons echoed off the walls and reverberated painfully in her montrals. The power behind his blow rippled down her baton, stinging her hand and almost knocking her to her knees. In an instant she pulled on the Force for strength to resist his blow. Simultaneously, she made an offensive lunge toward his chest with her other baton. He parried the blow, spun away, and stepped back. They both crouched low, slowly circling each other, ready for the next attack.

Ahsoka took a moment to reevaluate her battle strategy. She'd initially planned to use the Force only minimally to make the fight fair since Rex wasn't a Force user and because he was still recovering from his blaster wounds. That strategy, she decided, was no longer viable.

Looking at Rex, there was no doubt he was a formidable warrior. But from the attack she'd just experienced, he was much stronger and faster than he appeared, and his wounds weren't slowing him down. His enhanced strength, speed and healing were, no doubt, the product of his genetic engineering. Which made sense. After all, he was a clone, engineered to be the perfect soldier. With that realization Ahsoka knew she'd need to use all her combat skills and abilities in the Force, just as she had been trained.

Concentrating on Rex's footwork, Ahsoka waited until he was in the middle of a step with one foot off the ground. She attacked, rushing forward with both batons slicing and jabbing, throwing him off balance. Rex shuffled two steps back to regain his footing, then began to rain his own blows down on Ahsoka.

Batons blurred through the air, cracking and thudding against each other. Rex advanced two steps as Ahsoka retreated and spun to the side. Then she powered forward, pushing Rex back. He recovered and countered. Ahsoka blocked and advanced. Back and forth. Over and over. Striking and lunging. Ducking and spinning.

As they danced across the floor the joy of being fully in the moment and completely connected to the Force coursed through her and Ahsoka began to laugh.

Rex gave her a puzzled look and after a few half-hearted strikes, he disengaged. He stepped back, breathing heavily. Ahsoka lowered her guard, panting hard as she fought to regain her composure, but the confused look on Rex's face made it difficult.

"Having fun?" Rex asked between breaths, a curious half-smile on his face.

"You have no idea," Ahsoka said, her grin almost painful as she finally got her laughter under control.

Raising her guard Ahsoka said, "ready?"

Rex nodded and resumed his stance.

Ahsoka flipped the baton in her left hand into a backhand grip. She saw surprise on Rex's face and rather than let him adapt to her grip strategy, she pressed her attack. Leading with her left hand, the backhand grip was effective at swatting aside Rex's attempts to fend her off as she slashed at him repeatedly with her right hand. With both of his hands in defense Ahsoka's onslaught forced Rex backwards, step by step, until finally his back was against a stack of crates he'd been pummeling earlier.

Ahsoka pulled on the Force to widen the arcs of her swings and increase their tempo as she stepped closer, looking for the one chance to land a single blow and claim victory to their match. As she pressed her advantage another step, Rex completely caught her off guard with a drastic change of tactics.

Dropping his batons he lunged at her with inhuman speed, ducking between her arms and inside her guard. Hands like steel bands wrapped around both of her forearms, clamping them against her side, effectively neutralizing her weapons. If they had been her light sabers, a flick of her wrist would have slashed a cut along his thigh or upper arm and she'd have been free. But her batons no longer served her. What had been a sword fight had now turned into hand-to-hand combat.

Ahsoka dropped her batons without hesitation. The nature of the battle had changed. As she'd been taught by many Jedi Masters, she immersed herself in the Force and adapted to the moment.

As she disarmed herself, Rex's grip slid down to her wrists. He lifted, forcing both of their hands high above her head. Pivoting under one of her arms, he spun her around so he was behind her, effectively crossing both of their arms over her head. He jerked her arms down in front of her and used that leverage to pull her back against his chest, locking her against him.

The pressure of Rex's body on hers assaulted Ahsoka's senses. His heat burned against her skin. His scent was dizzying. His labored breathing pounded against her montrals as his muscles tensed around her. She almost gave up, if only to drown in his closeness.

But surrender was not in her repertoire.

Ahsoka threw her legs out in front of her dropping like a stone. She slipped down and out of Rex's embrace, landing hard on her butt. As she dropped, she gripped Rex's wrists and pulled his upper body down so he was leaning over her. Pulling her knees into her chest she brought her feet in and lifted, pushing against Rex's chest. She saw his wide-eyed realization of what was about to happen but he was too late to do anything about it.

Ahsoka pushed up with her feet lifting Rex off the ground. With no footing he had no leverage and no defense. As her legs rocketed him into the air, she jerked down hard on his hands. Rex flew up and flipped heels-over-head, crashing down hard onto his back in front of her.

Calling on the Force for speed and strength Ahsoka rose to her knees, still gripping Rex's wrists. She pivoted on one knee, bringing her body over Rex and straddled his chest, pining his hands to the ground beside his head, immobilizing him.

Ahsoka leaned over Rex, staring down at him as she held him in an iron grasp, her chest heaving from exertion. The power of the Force flowing through her was intoxicating. The thrill of battle vibrated through every nerve ending. She hadn't challenged herself like this in years. She'd not had anyone to spar with who could match her skill and who she wouldn't accidentally hurt. But Rex … Rex was glorious as a warrior.

Rex struggled for a few moments, but Ahsoka held him tightly with the Force. He finally seemed to realize there was no escape and that he'd been beaten. Still breathing heavily, he relaxed his body beneath her and said, "You've won the day, Commander. I yield."

His words surprised her and suddenly the elation of her victory felt hollow. She relaxed her grip on his wrists. But she didn't let go, didn't rise. She stared down at him, her eyes locked with his.

You've won the day.

Yes. She'd won the day.

But she'd lost the future.

Tomorrow Rex was leaving. She'd never see him again. Her destiny, if she had one, would stretch out before her without him in it.

Ahsoka continued to hover over Rex and he made no effort to move. Her gaze searched the brown depths of his eyes — for something — but she wasn't exactly sure what. That he wanted to stay? That he cared about her? That the thought of a future without her in it was too painful to consider?

Those were all the things she wanted to say to him — but couldn't.

Ahsoka released Rex's wrists, bringing her hands up to gently cradle his face. Her eyes were still lost in his as she leaned slowly down and kissed him.

She met no resistance. His lips were soft and yielding and she watched as he closed his eyes. She closed hers.

A calloused hand softly brushed her cheek. The other slowly stroked the lek draped alongside his face. Ahsoka pulled back for a moment, opening her eyes, to find his still closed. Then she brought her lips to his once more, the kiss gentle and soft and reverent.

Several heartbeats later Ahsoka forced herself to let him go and lifted her head.

Rex's hands slid slowly away, gliding down to his sides. His expression was soft. The longing in his eyes, intense and sorrowful.

"What was that for?" he whispered.

Ahsoka sighed. "I have too many regrets in my life. I didn't want one more."

She took one last opportunity to look at him, etching his features into her memory. Then she rose and stepped back, offering him a hand and pulled him to his feet.

He didn't let go. She didn't pull away. For a long moment Ahsoka looked at his large hand wrapped around her smaller one, fitting perfectly together, as if made for one another.

Maybe … in another time, another place, she thought.

Ahsoka looked up and said, "I'll get T'annon. Let's meet in my hut in an hour."

"Ah … alright … sure," Rex said. "I'll clean up … and …" His voice trailed off as his shoulders slumped.

Rex's hand slipped from Ahsoka's grasp — just like he was slipping from her life. Swallowing back unshed tears she turned and left.