Hi all, I'm a long time lurker on here and absolutely love reading this story has been going around and around my head, so I thought I'd be brave and post it.

I'm very new this this so please be kind. Much love V x

Harry! I scream HARRYYYYY!

Did it work was he dead? Is my last thought before darkness.

Waking up in the hospital wing in hogwarts

I wave in and out of consciousness, I feel him there and it soothes me - days must have passed, so much talking around me all in hushed tones - "I'm here" I scream, but they can't hear me!

I'm confused my ears are ringing - I cant feel him now, but poppy is there a constant presence in and out, "is that professor mcgonagall?I think I hear Mrs Wesley.

Someone is touching me now, I can feel them now holding my hand but I cannot respond. I'm off swimming in the deep, it's so peaceful so perfect. I can hear my name, I try to ignore it, but it has a pull to it.

I follow the sound, I know I need to start swimming towards the surface. I kick and kick and kick, finally i break the surface, I feel the oxygen fill my lungs.

I've been told it's weeks since the battle and I'm still weak. Poppy has told me what they think has happened, she allowed me to view memories it's all a little jumbled but each day it's becoming clearer.

Once I'm able to stand I will take myself to see him.

Facts according to Minerva are either timeturner incident or a dark spell.

One thing I know for certain- everyone around me knows I'm from the past, friends are scared to see me as they now know who I'm.

Everyone from my original timeframe memories have been restored but friends I've made in the new life have no prior knowledge as they were too young and now they know I'm a imposter not a 19 year old girl but a 37 year old married woman.

I know what really happened but 6 years have passed in real time.

My magic allows me to enter his wards…he's sitting in his armchair, glass of amber liquid in hand, he doesn't even look up. Having to give myself an internal talking to his not my teacher, this is not my teacher.

I cross to stand in front of him.. he raises his head we lock eyes and with a sneer he tells me under no uncertain terms that he doesn't want me in his private quarters and to get out. I try to reason with him, beg him to let me talk to him he needs to know what's happened and who's done this to me, to us.

If his look could kill I'd be 6ft under, he doesn't trust me it's written all over his face.

I disappeared 6 years ago and then re entered his life as an 11 year old girl, no one around him had any memory of his wife or our life together, only him.

He is too hurt, his mean face slips the dark eyes soften just briefly, but within a breath the hard exterior reclaims him. I try not to feel rejected by his words he's done the whole second war alone trying to keep me alive as I'm his wife but I only knew him as a student!

6 long years…. He's bitter, angry but I can see in his eyes the hurt.

He's volatile, the death eater persona and I cannot reach him, he wants me gone.

My last act of bravery before the last of his words hit target I push my way into our/ his bedroom trying to find any shred of evidence of the man I love in there …. Nothing… but one turn of my head towards the double wardrobe discovers a selection of my clothes are still hanging waiting… Hope, I have hope.