Chapter 11: Child Development

Monday Midday

Note: Nessa Stephenson is a character from my story "Doc Martin: The Movie," in which one chapter shows Martin actually attending the training course on people skills that Gavin Peters (the "unctuous, platitudinizing eunuch" of "On the Edge") pushed him into taking.

Dr. Vanessa Stephenson, Nessa as she preferred to be known, senior lecturer in the Department of Applied Psychology at the University of North Cornwall, concluded her lecture for the day. This was the first meeting of her child development course, on stages of socialization, beginning with the toddler phase (ages 12 to 36 months).

Her students gathered up their notes and belongings and congregated in small groups to discuss their thoughts.

Nessa made her way over to one student, a bit older than some of the others and clearly pregnant. "Excuse me, when everyone introduced themselves at the start of class, I believe you said your name was Louisa Ellingham? Any relation to Dr. Martin Ellingham?"

"Yes, that's my husband." Louisa was startled.

"He was in a course I taught several years ago at a further education college in Newquay. Actually I was supposed to teach it and he was supposed to be in it. Mastering Effective Interpersonal Skills. It was a two week course. Unfortunately I had a small medical incident the first day and Dr. Ellingham was able to identify my symptoms on the spot. His early diagnosis saved me from what could have been a potentially serious illness."

Louisa was relieved. "That's wonderful. I'd always wondered how Martin got on with that course. He doesn't always make the, um… best first impression on people."

"Well, he was a bit rude in how he went about it but in the end I didn't have to teach the course and he didn't have to take it. I imagine he was just as relieved as I was we didn't have to deal with each other after that!" She laughed.

Louisa smiled. "I'm really getting a lot out of this course so far. I'm so glad you're teaching it Nessa, instead of Dr. Oakwood. I understand he was on the faculty here until recently. He lived next door to me in Portwenn for a while. He and his wife had some rather… lax ideas about child behaviour and discipline.

Nessa laughed again. "I have to agree with you there. I think now that their son Sam is getting into his teenaged years they're seeing the value of setting boundaries for him, even if it's rather late. I've raised two children myself and I know it takes more than theories and good intentions."

She indicated Louisa's prominent belly. "Is this your first?"

"No. Martin and I have a son, James, who's two years now. This is actually our second and our third. Twins!"

"Oh congratulations! Twice over! You must be starving by now. I'm headed to the caff, would you like to join me?"

"You read my mind, but first I'm afraid I'm desperate for the loo. I'll meet you there."

"You know, I'm taking this course for professional reasons, but as the mum of a toddler I can't help wondering he's meeting all his targets," Louisa said, as she settled down to enjoy her sandwich.

"How do you mean?"

"Well, his physical, cognitive, and language development are all on course, possibly even advanced in some areas. He's rather quiet but when he does talk he's got quite a good vocabulary now and can use complete sentences. It's funny, Martin's aunt says he was the same way at this age."

"Sounds like everything's fine then," Nessa replied.

"Still, I worry about his social and emotional development. He went through a biting phase but he's over that now, thankfully. I think he enjoys adult attention more than being with other children. I mean, he's curious about other children, and he's concerned when he sees one fall down and get hurt, but he seems to prefer studying them rather than interacting with them."

"Is he beginning to assert his independence?"

"Oh yes. I know it's good that he is, but he wants to do everything his way and he has quite a temper when things don't go his way. He can be very bossy and demanding, and he likes to have everything exactly in its place and he likes his routines, just like his Daddy."

"He's really very curious," she continued. "Like if one of his toys goes under the sofa or the dog goes outside, he just has to know where it's gone. He enjoys being read to, which is good for his language development, but sometimes I think he likes Martin reading to him from his medical journals more than his age appropriate books."

"Well, I'm sure he enjoys being with his Daddy and hearing the sound of his voice," Nessa said.

"He certainly does. He even seems to like when Martin sometimes shows him videos of surgical procedures."

"I'm beginning to sense a pattern here. Are you worried he is turning out to be too much like Martin? Is that actually a problem?"

"Umm, well not a problem as such. It's just that, well you know what Martin can be like just from your interaction with him that one time. It's not ideal."

"Martin certainly is a unique personality. And yet you love him, enough to marry him and start a family with him."

"Of course. It's just… we've had our ups and downs, made it through some rough patches. I suppose I just hope James has a little bit of me to balance out his personality."

"It sounds like these are normal developments and you shouldn't be concerned. In the end, no child is a clone of either the father or mother, they will always grow into their own unique self."

"Martin certainly doesn't seem to anything of his father's personality at all," Louisa mused.

"Are they close?"

"No and his father died last year. I gather Martin stood up to him about a dispute over a family-owned farm a few years ago, and they hadn't spoken for years before that, but I think still he craved his father's respect. They did share a love of medicine after all, and Martin followed in his footsteps in becoming a doctor and then a surgeon. He even specialized in the same type of surgery as his father. Now that the old man is gone I can't help wondering if he's taking out his frustration on his cousin Malcolm, who's pretty extroverted like Martin's father was. Martin is very opposed to a development plan Malcolm has for Portwenn, even though it could really help the village."

"Is that the outlet mall? I heard about that. I saw some a student wearing a badge supporting it the other day. You think it's a good idea but I notice you don't have a badge."

Louisa considered this for a moment. "I suppose I see some good points about it but I'm not really all that committed to backing it. To be honest I wondered if I was the one who was being contrary because I thought Martin was being unreasonable, on account of not liking his cousin. We're mostly past the rough patches in our relationship and there's no point in antagonizing him by wearing a silly badge."

"I think that's a sign of healthy relationship growth," Nessa replied. "As I said, Martin is a unique personality and you've learned to moderate your responses to him to reduce conflict, even if he isn't always good at moderating his responses. You should feel good about that."

Afterward, as she walked to her car, Louisa did feel good about their conversation, but some nagging doubts remained.

To be continued…