A/N: I'm using the app for the first time and it's very buggy, so I apologize if my story doesn't have paragraph breaks.
I know it's been 10 years since the first movie and even longer since the book. But I've been obsessing over the series again. And I can't help but wonder what would have happened at the berry scene if Peeta never gave Katniss the idea to use the berries.
As Cato's canon echoed through the arena, I could feel the weight of the world lifting off my shoulders. Turning to face Peeta, I could tell he felt the same way. A wave of relief flooded across his face, as his blue eyes met mine. His smile sending comfort through me. We won. We're going home. Without a second thought I was in his arm, doing most of the work to support his weak body during our embrace. Looking at him I couldn't help but notice his face had gotten increasingly pale in the last few hours of Cato's struggles against the Muttations. My lousy tourniquet was doing the best it could, but the bandage around Peeta's leg, made out of the fabric of my shirt, was soaked with blood where the teeth of the Mutt had bore deep into his flesh. He needed medical attention, and soon.
I pull myself out of Peeta's embrace while still steadying him, "Hey! What's going on!?" I shout out into the air, hoping for any sign of hovercraft.
"The body…" Peeta mumbles out, "maybe we need to move away from it." He says, sounding as weak as ever. I look around towards the end of the cornucopia. "Okay. Do you think you can make it to the lake?" I ask. "I think I better try" he responds.
I help Peeta towards the edge of the cornucopia, helping him as he sits and slowly slides down. He makes no noise, but I can tell in the way his muscles tense and by the expression on his face, that he is in pain. He lands in a heap on the ground, not moving. I quickly slide down, helping him back up as we hobble towards the lake. "Drink." I instruct Peeta as we make it to the water's edge. I know we will be in the capitol soon, but it can't hurt. He nodded, giving no protest as he hydrated.
The lone call of a mockingjay was music to my ears as it signaled the hovercraft that came and took away whatever was left of Cato's body. I look back towards Peeta while we wait for the announcement, the look of hope in his eyes makes the corners of my mouth turn up in a grin. Until, the look of hope faded away and he looks back at me, "what are they waiting for?" He asks me. But, I can't answer because I don't know. I look around the arena, for any sign of an answer I can find.
I open my mouth to speak before the sound of trumpets sounds off through the arena. This is it. "Greetings to the final contestants of the 74th Hunger Games." Claudius Templesmith's voice boomed in the background "The earlier revision has been revoked. Closer examination of the rule book has disclosed that only one winner may be allowed. Good luck and may the odds be ever in your favor."
No. This can't be happening. I gasp, releasing a sound from my mouth that can only be described as a hoarse sob. No. After all of this, I can't lose him. Not after everything we've been through. I'm panicking, looking around the arena as I hear Peeta limping through the lake water, coming towards me. My instinct forces me to load an arrow, aimed right at his heart. But he holds his hands up, empty, and I lower my bow, throwing it to the ground in shame. If they weren't empty would I really have killed him? No. No I wouldn't. I need him, alive. With me.
"No. Do it." He forces out, limping towards me, scooping up my weapon and forcing it back in my hands. "I can't…. I won't!" I say, longing for him, and venom towards the capitol in my words. "Fine, I'll go first anyways" Peeta says, reaching down towards his makeshift bandage, pulling at it. My eyes widen as I move towards him and grab his hand to stop him, "No! You can't kill yourself!" I say frantically. He's already lost too much blood. I lower him to the ground as I start trying to dress his bandage again, but it feels futile. My heart is racing as the blood slowly pools around the bandage. I remove my jacket to rip off another piece of my shirt's fabric, wrapping it around the old bandage.
"Katniss…" Peeta whispers, his hand reaching up to cup my cheek as I try to work as quickly as possible, but the new bandage is already soaked as well, and I feel like I'm flailing, I can't think. "Katniss" he repeats with more force, trying to get my attention. "Katniss. Please, it's what I want." He states, his voice trying to be strong and forceful, but I know it pains him.
"You're not leaving me alone here." I say, I can feel the tears in my eyes.
He sighs. "Listen. You won't be alone. You have Prim, and your mother. You have…" he pauses for a second, an expression I can't place plastered across his face, "Gale. You have people for you Katniss."
I shake my head, "I need you."
His skin is somewhat grey at this point, his eyes flutter through labored breaths as he desperately tries to hold on to life. His eyes start to close and I move quickly towards his head, shaking his shoulders slightly, "Peeta? Peeta!" His eyes open again, his blue eyes so much more vibrant against his skin. "You'll have me. Always." He says, looking up at me. Our eyes meet and I kiss him, my eyes watering. Foolishly hoping I'll heal him, like those fantasy stories we would read in elementary school. Only this isn't a fairytale, and the capitol made it clear there are no Happily Ever Afters. I pull back and he's now smiling, his smile is so contagious that I can't help but smile too. Even though I'm now crying, even though I'm losing him, I'm smiling because he is.
"At least I'll die happy." He says, his smile still on his face, as he reaches up to brush a strand of hair behind me ear, "I love you, Katniss, for real. Everything… was true." And my smile breaks, my stomach sinks, my heart aches. Everything. Everything was true? In the last few moments, everything was real for me, I forgot about the cameras scattered around, I was so focused on saving him. Only he mattered. But everything at the capitol, the interview, the star crossed lovers… wasn't a game to him? He can sense something is wrong, "what… Katniss?" He asks. "Stop. Please, stop, you're not going to die" I reply, almost hyperventilating at this point.
He sighs, as he lays in my arms, he's given up protesting "can you sing to me?" He asked.
My heart stopped as I flashed back to Rue. Watching her die, singing to her. And now, I'm with Peeta, the man I… love? I've been confused about my feelings towards Peeta since the beginning. But in this moment I know one thing is certain. That I need him. I need him to live, and for us to go home together. The boy with the bread who gave her life so many years ago, and now she was with him. And he is dying. And he wants me to sing. I remember the story he told me in the cave, about my mother falling for my fathers voice, and Peeta falling for my voice in elementary school. I choke on a tear as I nod, slowly, I don't want to sing. Because I know if I sing I will have to accept he is dying. But, I want to do it for him. If Peeta wants me to sing, I will sing.
"Please?" He asks, softly.
I nod again as I try to accept what's happening and as tears roll down my cheeks I sing.
I don't sing the same song I sing Rue, that is now her song. Instead, I sing a song that my father used to sing to my mother all the time when I was a kid, when he was still alive. This is a song about love, about growing old together. As im singing, Peeta pulls my forehead down to kiss me. But I keep singing, because it's what Peeta wants. My eyes move from his chest to watch his labored breathing, to his smile- still on his face, to his eyes, which are now closed and have a single tear rolling down his cheek. He is so strong, throughout all the pain he has been in, he has never cried. And she knew now that he was only crying because of this outcome, because of the capitol, and she realized now it's because he was losing her. And she was crying for the same reason.
I continued singing as I grabbed his hand, squeezing it tightly but only feeling a small weak squeeze back.
I continued singing as she watching his chest rise and fall, slower and slower each time.
I continued singing as she felt his grip on her hand loosen, and watched his chest fall one more time.
"Peeta?" I asked after my song ended, but he lied still. Unmoving. And that's when I heard the sound that signaled that the boy with the bread was gone. The cannon rang out and echoed through my ears, through my whole body, and suddenly I was frantic again, not nearly as graceful as i was with Rues death.
"Peeta!" I cried out, my tears finally falling from my eyes as I let go of his hand, watching it fall to his chest. Lifeless. "No. No no no, Peeta please come back" I said, shaking his shoulders. Screaming his name. My heart was racing, I didn't even notice the mockingjay warning for the hovercraft, nor did i notice the machine flying above me. I looked up and threw myself over Peeta's body as the metal claw started descending. I didn't want to see it. I didn't want to see him being lifted in the air, away from me, forever. And, if it couldn't get to him, it couldn't take him.
I hugged tightly onto him, noticing how cold his once warm body that sheltered her in all those cold nights already felt, no doubt from blood loss. All at once everything flash through her mind. That night in the rain when he took a beating to give her bread, how he was able to raise the mood in the capitol with all the tension in the air, finding him at the River bank, those nights in the cave, and how he never said it but the guilt he felt after Foxface ate the poisonous berries he picked… the berries.
The must have already announced her as the winner of the 74th Hunger Games while I was in her mind, because as I fiddled for the leather pouch of berries the cheers of her name from the capitol was loud in her ear, intertwined with forlorn cries for Peeta. Freeing the leather pouch of berries from my belt, I frantically try to open it as the cheers turned to gasps. The capitol took Peeta away from her. They killed the boy who always represented life. So, she would take away their victor. She would die here with Peeta.
Taking the pouch that now contained my death, I poured all of the berries out into my palm, swiftly raising my hand to my mouth but before I could open my mouth, my arm was grabbed from behind by a hand dressed in white, causing me to drop the berries.
"No!" I screamed as I was pulled back off of Peeta by two peace keepers. I started kicking and screaming, calling Peeta's name as the claw from the hovercraft finally descended, gently wrapping around his lifeless body as to not damage it any further. Almost as if he was as important to the capitol as he was to her. I continued to cry out his name, as if it would alert him to the hovercraft above. As if he would for some miracle wake up and run over to me. But he wouldn't. I was still crying out for him when I felt the needle in my neck. Instantly, my kicks became slower and my legs heavy as the drug coursed though my system. My eyes begged to close, getting heavy as the drug took its toll.
I said his name one more time, this time it came out more as a whimper and the last thing I saw before I gave into the darkness was Peeta's wavy blonde hair, glimmering in the sunlight as he was pulled up into the air, away from me.
Forever.