Shen Yuan sighed as he got out of the bus, carrying bags of grocery with him, a little bit too heavy for his slim arms. At least they weren't just filled with instant and microwavable foods, that was a start. He had tried cooking, he wasn't good at it by any means, but at least it was giving him something to do.
He had been trying to find a new job, as he couldn't just rely on his parent's money to survive. Apparently, his last shitty job thought that someone being unconscious for many weeks was enough to lay them off. He guesses it was fair, as it couldn't be said when he would wake up, but still. The only positive of that was that in the past three weeks, it had taken his mind off of his "other life" for a little while.
He had somehow hoped to wake up the next day to being back in Luo Binghe arms, but of course, reality wouldn't be this nice to him. And this world didn't have any magic and trick that could help him bring him back either. It was hard to swallow, but he had to accept he would now simply be Shen Yuan, an introvert in his mid-twenties trying to find a job.
At least he had his sister around, as she came more often to check on him, just in case. He somewhat also suspected that she was being worried about his attitude, maybe he seemed like he had given up on life too much, despite it not being true. He did have a thought that really dying this time might bring him back, but then stopped himself from thinking that rather quickly. How could he be sure he would be sent back to Proud Immortal Demon Way by the System when he died? He would rather cherish the memories than just fail in his attempt.
When he got back to his apartment he sighed again, knowing he would be alone yet again in the small space. Maybe he could suggest to his sister to come live with him? Though he only had one room, maybe this wasn't a good idea. He pushed this idea to the side of his mind, taking note that he would look into it later.
When he was finally in he placed the bags on the floor, bending over to take off his shoes, when he suddenly froze. Was it a sound coming from his room he just heard? When he heard some more, he frowned, moving as quietly as possible. For sure, someone was inside his room, it was too clear to be from his neighbours, who were not very likely to be home in the middle of the day.
There had been a pause in the noises, as if the other person was checking for more sounds from his side, most likely not expecting for someone to be coming in. After a while he still heard some noise, as if he had been cleared of suspicion.
He grabbed one of the first things his hands could touch in the living room, which ended up being a cushion. Granted it wasn't the most efficient weapon, but the kitchen was too close to his room to try that first. He had grabbed unconsciously his fan, even though it's weak frame wouldn't do much against a robber. It was a habit taken from fighting with it all these years.
He was slowly going for his room, unsure where this bravery came from when he should probably just be calling the cop. They would probably not be there on time to save him he vaguely told himself.
Then, the door suddenly opened, startling him so bad that he jumped back, using his cushion as a shield, his fan pointed vaguely towards the door like a sword. Yet, despite expecting something to go at him, it didn't happen. He instead felt like the other person was staring at him.
He finally looked back in front of him, only to freeze, his eyes growing wide behind his glasses. This had to be a hallucination from his desire, mixed with some lack of sleep.
"Binghe?" he called weakly, still not believing it, taking off his glasses a moment to rub his eyes. Yet, when he put them back on, the man was still standing there.
On the other side, Binghe was staring at the man that had entered what he assumed was his Shizun home. He looked nothing like the man he knew. This man was smaller, wore a strange face accessory in front of his eyes and didn't seemed very strong. Yet, the way his eyes had recognised him immediately was strange, calling out to him as if they were familiar with one another.
This universe was strange, so maybe is Shizun form was also different?
"Shizun?" he then called out, only to be taken aback by the sudden tears welling up in the other man eyes, letting his cushion fall to the ground.
Oh.
This had to be Shizun, his guts were telling him it had to be. Who would look so relieved, despite the tears, upon seeing him? The man then look like he wanted to take a step forward, only to seemingly hesitate, looking down at himself.
Shen Yuan had hesitated, unsure whether or not he should go to him. Was it really alright? Was Luo Binghe going to be alright with him? After all, in this universe, he wasn't anyone Shizun and was far from having the fam Shen Qingqiu had. The self-doubt that had always been there in his life suddenly decided to hit back, wondering if Luo Binghe wanted Shen Qingqiu, not Shen Yuan.
He was startled out of his self-doubt when he felt strong arms circling him, squeezing him against a firm and familiar chest, despite not hitting it at his usual place. Since the Demon Lord had made his move first he figured it was okay now, grabbing at his robes probably has desperately as the taller man was holding him. As if letting go would make any of them disappear, again.
"This disciple was so scared to never see Shizun" he heard said against the crook of his neck, tears slowly seeping through his hoodie. "The last months have been the worst, I thought I would never find you" he added.
This caused Shen Yuan to let a weak chocked laughter from his mouth, not restraining himself from crying. It would be too hard to do so anyway now that he didn't actually have to maintain some kind of appearance. "This Shiz- This Shen was also scared of never seeing you again," he said, feeling the arm holding him tighter. "How did you do it" he suddenly asked, only then confused as to what way could have been used to do so.
"This Disciple fixed Xin Mo" he heard, Luo Binghe sounding a little unsure whether or not his Shizun would be angry at the news, relaxing a little when scolding never came. "It was so hard going through all these universes, all the "Shizun" were cold and cruel" he explained, "And all these other... me? They were just as cold and cruel".
Shen Yuan then had a bad feeling about what he had learned from those travel, bending back a little to look at the Demon Lord face. Oh. He had seen and heard what had been done to these Shen Qingqiu. He quickly went and cupped the other man face, trying to calm him down and soothe his distress at the memories.
"This must have been really hard for Binghe" he gently said, getting on his tiptoe to give him a reassuring kiss on his forehead, only succeeding because the taller man bended down a little. "This Shi- Shen is really proud of Binghe for being strong and finally finding him despite all these horrible encounters" he praised him, trying to calm him down.
Yet, some fear was lingering in the other man eyes, as if these encounters had put some doubt in him. "But... what if I also turn out like these other Luo Binghe, what if I also h-hurt my..." The simple idea of saying out loud made him choke on his tears, pulling the other one closer to him.
Shen Yuan wasn't sure how to tell him he was certain such a thing would never happen. He had worked hard for such an ending to never happen to himself after all. He had instead turned the Stallion novel protagonist into a protective, loyal and infatuated husband.
He gently tried to shush him, stroking his cheeks with his thumbs, smiling softly at him. "Would Binghe ever try to hurt me?" he then asked gently.
"No!" shouted the other one, eyes wide with horror at the thought.
Shen Yuan then slightly shook his head, "Then Binghe will never hurt me" he pointed out. At least, never voluntarily. The Demon Lord seemed to be about to argue about what he saw, stopped by a quick and soft kiss on his lips. "My Binghe is different from these other Binghe," he said with clear conviction, "If he never sought to hurt me and take revenge, then he won't suddenly change his mind and do it".
His word seemed to calm him down, happy to see at least fewer tears rolling out of his eyes. How could such a soft crybaby even think he would turn him into a human stick? He couldn't be sure he would never do it to someone else, after all, he had already done that, but he was certain it would never be his fate.
Then they stayed in this embrace for a long moment without talking, only taking in the heartbeat and the warmth coming from the other. Shen Yuan had missed it so much, yet he knew just how much worst Luo Binghe must have had it. Only three weeks had gone by for him, yet how long had it been for his husband? Easily months. Many months where he would also find Shen Qingqiu, simply not the right one.
Once they were both fully calmed down, Shen Yuan gently got out of the taller man arms, not without some difficulties. Luo Binghe wouldn't let him go, only accepting to do so when Shen Yuan took both his hands as a second option. He dragged him towards the kitchen, where he helped washing both their faces from the dried tears.
He was left to now worry about how he would explain to his husband what had happened exactly and who he was. Clearly, he wasn't Shen Qingqiu, both body and mind, although he had never been the mind either. This was clearly far from being Proud Immortal Demon Way, he was himself confused as to how he had actually managed to reach him. Clearly, Luo Binghe would wonder who he was, despite very obviously responding as if he was his Shizun.
He was taken out of his worries when he heard Binghe gently asked "Why don't you use Shizun anymore?", sounding a little confused about this matter, especially since Shen Yuan had slipped up earlier. The human stopped the cleaning of his glasses lens, pausing a little. He was looking for how to word his explanation, supposing it could be a good start, going slowly in the task of explaining all to him.
He waited a little bit as if apprehending the system would somehow decide to show up, only the be reassured by the lack of warning pop-up. "Well, I am not Shen Qingqiu anymore, how could I take on such a title when I am not in any way a Shizun here" he tried, seeing a slight frown drawing itself on the man face, looking confused.
"You are not Shen Qingqiu?" the Demon Lord asked carefully, Shen Yuan tensing a little bit at how bad it might sound after all that had happened minutes ago. "I was! In a way... but not anymore" he tried to explain, "It's complicated".
There was a silence between them, Shen Yuan not daring to look up, scared he might see betrayal and anger in the other eyes. It felt like he was lying about who he was, yet it was true he wasn't actually Shen Qingqiu. Once he had deblocked the OOC function, he had very much acted more like himself, although he had to restrain himself and tweak some part a little more to hold up to the original owner title and reputation. Other than the System forcing him to act out in some ways, the way he had treated Binghe was mostly all of his own ways, as were also most of his choices outside of the System threatening taking out B-points.
"Were you the one who took care of me?" came a question, the tone still calm, despite that Shen Yuan thought it was really nice to look at the table. "Yes, well, not from your arrival to Qing Jing Peak, but I was the one who mostly did it". He received a humming at his response, some time passing again as if the Demon Lord was thinking.
"And you are also the one who pushed me into the abyss, ran from me and self-destructed to save me" he added, his voice lower this time, filled with bad memories. "... Yes, although it cannot really be forgiven I suppose, I didn't really have a choice to push you down" he explained, shrinking a little bit on himself when he felt the stare of Binghe on him. "Really?".
"It's complicated" he managed to whisper, not feeling like right now was the moment to go on what was the System, nor that Luo Binghe was actually the fruit of a novel, a stallion one at that. The taller man seemed to leave it at that, yet Shen Yuan knew he wouldn't be able to run away from that talk for forever.
"You are also the one who was there at the Maigu Ridge, saving me again". Shen Yuan simply nodded this time, knowing the man wouldn't miss his move. Those were not exactly the best of memories and to this day he was still thinking about how he could have probably managed to keep Binghe from falling so easily into Xin Mo influence.
"And this Shen was the one to accept marrying me" he added. A small smile drew itself on his face when he realised the way he was saying it sounded like he would totally accept Shen Yuan as his husband, or at least the original Shen Yuan. "Yes, I did".
There was a pause after his answer, making him slightly anxious again. Were his answers bad? He jumped when he felt hands reaching to grab his gently, looking back up at the Demon Lord who had come closer to him. "Then this Shen," he said, using the way Shen Yuan had been referring to himself earlier, "Is also my Shizun, even if the body isn't the same, and that he doesn't have any disciples in this universe, and isn't the original Shen Qingqiu, This Shizun will always stay my Shizun" he smiled softly, getting closer to put a gentle kiss on his lips. "I will accept any form this husband of mine takes" he whispered gently while resting his forehead against his.
Relief washed over him at those words, feeling like a weight had been taken off of his shoulders. He quickly wrapped his arms around Binghe's neck, hugging him tightly, feeling the said hug being reciprocated with vigour, the other clearly not ready to let go. "This Shizun really loves you" he whispered while leaving a kiss at his temple. "I know" he received back.
They stayed like this for a little while, until Shen Yuan yelped when he was suddenly lifted. Luo Binghe was now carrying him, seemingly as if he wasn't weighing anything. He hugged him a little tighter to make sure he wouldn't fall, although with the Demon Lord there were very little chances of it happening.
"Binghe, what are you doing?" he suddenly asked, a little amused that he would suddenly pick him up like this. "Shizun looks tired", pointed out the taller man, not letting go of him even when Shen Yuan suddenly straighten up a bit. "Wait, I can't go relax now, I have grocery to put in the refrigerator".
Binghe then stopped, looking at him rather confused, only for the human to realised he probably had no clue what a refrigerator was supposed to be. "Put me down and then I'll go and lay down, how about that?" he tried, finding it to be a good agreement.
Luo Binghe then looked towards the door, where bags were still laying on the ground. He didn't put Shen Yuan down when he started walking towards them, nor when he crouched down to grab the bags with one hand. "Binghe! This Shizun can take care of it himself, please put me down" he asked again, only gaining a "But this disciple wants to help his husband".
No. Not the puppy eyes! He wouldn't fall for them agai-
It was too late, as Shen Yuan was still being perched on one of Binghe's arm, the other one helping to put the things where they needed to be. Well, he supposed that he wouldn't complain about not needing to nearly go on the counter to put stuff in the top cupboard. He was, hopefully discreetly, looking at how curious and confused Binghe was at how the refrigerator was working. He was coming from a world of magic, yet electricity-powered things were the weird thing.
Once everything was safely placed, sure not to be affected by the ambient temperature, he was carried back to his room. The place looked strangely more clean than the last time he had been in there. And from the proud look on Binghe face as he was taking in the lack of mess, he figured the Demon Lord had taken care of it. He gently patted his fluffy hair, as a way to show he did a good job.
He was then laid on the bed, as if he couldn't do it himself, seeing from the corner of his eyes Binghe crouching down next to the bed. "What are you doing?" he then asked, confused. "This bed is too small for the two of us, this disciple wouldn't want for Shizun to be uncomfortable".
Shen Yuan rolled his eyes at that, moving to lay on his side, slipping closer to the wall, patting the empty place on the bed. "This Shizun would prefer Binghe being in the bed with him". It really didn't take much more convincing to do, as the man was already getting onto the bed with him. He had most likely really missed holding onto him as they were laying down, as Shen Yuan felt a strong arm going over his waist to pull him closer.
With his hoodie still on he would probably start feeling hot soon, yet it seemed like a very minor inconvenience compared to finally being able to sleep next to him again. Even the bed being too small for two grown men, one rather large at that, didn't seem too bad either.
"Is Shizun hungry?" Shen Yuan heard, making him chuckle a little, not surprised that Binghe wouldn't settle down without worrying about everything for him. "No" he whispered as he lied a little. He wasn't hungry enough to need to eat right now, all he wanted to do was laying there with Binghe. He grabbed at his dark robe, both so he would be able to have Binghe relax from using Xin Mo this much, but also to prevent him from maybe burning the building down. "Just stay with me" he whispered.
Even without looking up, he could tell this request was making his husband happy. A little while later he fell asleep for a nap at the feeling of a hand going through his short hairs.
Really, this was a taste from home he had been missing in the past weeks, making all his worries fade away for the time being.