The time passed slowly and before La'an knew, six days had gone by. Every morning she still woke to Christine fast asleep, spread out on top of her, bear hugging her like her life depended on it. And every morning she had succeeded at getting out from underneath her without waking her. For the first three days she basically lived in Christine's purple hoodie. It was soft and comforting, and there was something about it that made her feel safe.
The three of them had gotten into a routine of sorts. They ate all their meals together, they watched movies – some animated, some live action, and they listened to Christine as she told them stories from her childhood. Oriana would talk about the beach her family used to visit, and La'an would keep quiet, not having many happy memories to think back on.
Sitting down at the table, La'an ate her porridge, going over the sensor reports from the night. Putting down her PADD, she looked over to Christine who was slowly moving her fruit salad around with her fork, not really eating much of it.
Seeing a fresh strawberry poking up the side of Christine's bowl, La'an reached over and plucked it out, grinning at Christine as she bit into it, feeling the other woman playfully nudge her with her foot under the table.
"You are such a brat," Christine chuckled, biting into a piece of watermelon.
"Am not," La'an replied, finishing off the strawberry and eyeing off the other one in the bowl."
"And you think I'm bad," Oriana commented through a mouthful of pancakes.
"In all seriousness, are you okay, Christine? You've usually finished by now," La'an asked, stealing the other strawberry.
"I am, I just feel a little off today. Nothing to worry about," Christine replied, handing Oriana a napkin as maple syrup started to run down her chin.
"Let me know if you need anything throughout the day," La'an responded, a little bit of worry nagging in the back of her head as she looked at Christine. She looked a little pale, but that was something La'an decided she would leave until Christine told her otherwise.
Taking another mouthful of porridge, La'an picked up her PADD and was just about to continue reading as the alarm sounded throughout the living area. Racing to the bridge, she sat behind the helm and brought up the warning.
"There is another ship heading directly to us. It has shields raised but no weapons activated. I believe it is an Orcaynian vessel," La'an said, bringing it up on the viewscreen.
"We should try to hail them, let them know we are friendly and mean no harm," Christine added, her fingers dancing over the controls as she silenced the alarm.
"This is the Federation ship Cannon, please reply," La'an said, opening hailing frequencies.
"Greetings Cannon, we are the Orcaynian vessel Kosada. I am Captain Aeria," a woman responded, her purple eyes bright against her dark hair as she looked between them.
"I am Lieutenant La'an Noonien-Singh and this is Nurse Christine Chapel," La'an replied, introducing them.
"I have come to meet you to ask if you intend on crossing our space?" Captain Aeria questioned, her eyes never leaving them.
"We were hoping to pass through your space, yes. If it's permitted of course," La'an replied, feeling a little unnerved under the gaze of the woman.
"There are certain rules for passing through our space that you need to be aware of…is that little girl the daughter of you both?" Captain Aeria asked, spotting Oriana hiding behind Christine's chair.
"This is Oriana, we rescued her from a Gorn infested ship and we are trying to find her family to reunite her with them," La'an explained, knowing by the look on the woman's face she had said something wrong.
"And I'm guessing that yourself and Nurse Chapel are not together?"
"Um, no, we are not," La'an replied, feeling something strange in the pit of her stomach.
"It is forbidden to travel through Orcaynian space with a child who has unwed or ununited caregivers," Captain Aeria explained, the look in her eyes sharp.
"Under Federation law, we are both her caregivers until we reunite her with her family," Christine added, hoping it would help.
"If you have both taken on the role of caregiver, I'm sorry but you cannot pass through our space," Captain Aeria said, giving them a stern look.
"What if they get married?" Oriana piped up, getting a stunned, wide-eyed look from both La'an and Christine.
"That would allow you through our space. According to our readings, you will reach the edge of our solar system in four days. You have that long to decide to wed under Orcaynian law or not. If you decide to, the ceremony will be held on the outermost planet when the double suns reach peak in the sky. We will contact you again in four days for an answer when you reach our space."
Watching as the screen returned to the stars passing by, Christine could see how white her knuckles were as she gripped onto the armrest of her chair. She couldn't quite place how she was feeling but she knew it wasn't great. She could feel La'an's eyes on her, as a worried look crossed her face for only a moment.
Feeling a warm, soft hand rest on top of hers, she slightly relaxed her grip.
"Excuse me for a moment, I don't feel too great," she said quickly. Exiting the bridge, she headed straight for her quarters and kicked off her shoes once inside.
Christine knew she was beginning to panic. She could feel her heartbeat increasing, her palms started to get sweaty, and her breathing was getting more rapid. Flopping onto her bed, she grabbed one of the pillows and held it to her chest.
Trying to take slow steady breaths, Christine knew her body and knew what was happening. She tried to remind herself that nothing was going on between herself and La'an, and it was only for the mission. She was not ready to get married, she couldn't get married. By now, if she was anywhere else, she would have shoved herself into an escape pod and fled, finding a planet filled with marshes to live among nature and the tree creatures until her days were over.
Christine Chapel didn't like to commit herself to anyone, she ran when things got serious. She only had flings, she had a good time, and when morning came the person was forgotten about. No strings attached, just how she liked it.
Sure, she knew it was only for Oriana, to help her find her family, but something felt very real about an entire marriage ceremony. Christine could objectively say that La'an was quite a beautiful woman, she was both smart and courageous, and with her, Christine felt safe.
Pulling the pillow closer, she closed her eyes as the panic overwhelmed her and her feelings began to go numb.
In the living area, La'an cleaned up what remained of breakfast, stealing a few more pieces of fruit out of Christine's bowl before placing it back in the synthesiser to be reused. Oriana sat on the couch, a PADD in hand as she did her schoolwork.
"Are you willing to marry Christine?" Oriana asked, turning so she was facing La'an.
Feeling a little taken aback at the question, La'an continued to clean the table as something to do. "I would, especially if it means finding clues that lead us to your family," she replied, realising she had nothing else to clean.
"Oh, so you wouldn't marry her otherwise?"
"Um…how's your schoolwork going?" La'an asked, quickly changing the subject.
"It's good. I remember doing some of this. So, Christine; I think she'd make a good wife for you," Oriana said, smiling at La'an.
"Thanks, I think. I'm going to check on Christine and make sure she's okay. When you finish your schoolwork, do you want to pick something we can do?" La'an said, realising Christine had been gone for a good fifteen minutes.
Walking into their shared quarters, La'an took a deep breath in and scanned the room, her eyes falling on Christine lying on the bed. Going over to her, La'an kicked off her shoes and laid down next to her.
Noticing tears running down Christine's face, La'an shuffled a little closer to her, and reached out, holding her hand, her thumb gently running over the back of Christine's hand. La'an knew she wasn't very good when it came to comforting others, but there was this feeling inside of her, somewhere deep within the pit of her stomach, and it made her want to stop the tears and see a smile on Christine's face.
"What's wrong?" La'an gently asked, hoping she would be able to help.
"It's nothing, I'm just being stupid," Christine replied, using her free hand to wipe at her face.
"You're not stupid. As what you once told me, your feelings are valid, and if something has gotten you like this, I would like to help and be here for you," La'an said, giving Christine's hand a gentle squeeze. "Please talk to me, Christine."
Breathing in deeply through her nose, Christine closed her eyes and rested her forehead against their joined hands. "My entire life I've never been able to be in any kind of relationship. I can't commit to anyone, I can't give them what they need without opening myself up, and I feel like I can't do that. I'm just scared, and when Oriana suggested marriage, my brain went into overdrive and brought up everything I've been trying to suppress. I know it's stupid, but when the panic sets in there's nothing I can do to stop it."
"It's okay to feel like that. When Oriana said marriage, I too wanted to run the other way. Ever since being saved by Una, I can't get close to anyone either. It's like a block inside of you, pushing everyone away. It's like protecting yourself from getting hurt," La'an said, offering Christine a small smile. "I don't want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable."
"That kind of helps," Christine replied, opening her eyes and looking at La'an. "Do we know how long it'll take us either way?"
"I did check, it'll take us twenty-seven days to go around Orcaynian space, or four days to go through it if we hold warp," La'an replied.
"Four days sounds a lot better," Christine said. She knew what had to be done.
"Just remember, if we do decide to get married, it's only valid in this system. It's like a fake marriage almost to please those around us. Kind of like the fake dating you see in those old movies from the twenty-first century, if it helps, we can think of it like that," La'an replied, reaching out and gently wiping away the remaining tears from Christine's face.
"I guess you're right," Christine said, leaning into La'an's touch for a moment. Looking into La'an's brown eyes, Christine felt something warm inside her, something she refused to let herself feel.
"It's up to you, whatever you decide. I promise I won't do anything to hurt you," La'an replied, unable to tear her eyes away from Christine's.
Hearing the door chime, Christine tore her eyes away from La'an's and rolled over, putting the pillow back up against the headboard. "We should probably head back out there."
"Yeah, we should."
Getting up off the bed, Christine quickly blew her nose and headed out after La'an.
"I've finished my history lesson for the day and completed the activities. I'm so bored," Oriana said, flopping on the couch as La'an and Christine joined her.
"What do you want to do?" La'an asked, knowing it was best to give Oriana the option instead of forcing a few onto her.
"Can I play a video game on the projector?"
"You can, but keep the volume down please."
"Also, what are doing with the Orcaynians? Are we finding another way around or what?" Oriana asked, looking between the two women.
"If it's okay with La'an, I think we're getting married," Christine replied, squashing down the little bit of panic she felt. La'an's words were still clear in her head, and they somehow calmed her.
"That's fine with me," La'an replied, her hand gently brushing against Christine's.
"We need to find you both something to wear!" Oriana excitedly said, jumping up and smiling. "Did either of you pack something cute?" she added, rubbing her hands together.
"I only brought clothing that was practical," La'an replied, not liking this path Oriana was going down.
"Yeah, I didn't pack dresses either," Christine said, sighing. She was already not feeling good, and finding something to wear to a wedding she was involved in, made the gnawing in her stomach worse.
"I think, Christine, a blue dress would like nice. It'll bring out your eyes. La'an, don't you agree that she'd look beautiful in blue?" Oriana asked, smiling as La'an looked like she wanted to run a thousand miles away.
"I think Christine would look nice in any colour," La'an replied, not wanting to put her foot in it.
"But look at her eyes, and tell me blue wouldn't look beautiful," Oriana challenged, dragging La'an closer to Christine. "Look at her eyes and what do you see?" Oriana had a plan, it was a good plan, but La'an wasn't giving in. She would just have to work harder.
Wanting to get this over with, La'an looked at Christine's eyes and felt her breath catch in her throat. Christine's eyes were the bluest she had ever seen. They were gorgeous and reminded her of the crystal waters on Earth. Blue would look stunning on Christine, and as those thoughts crossed her mind, she felt something bubble just under the surface. "Blue would look beautiful," La'an managed to say, hoping her face gave nothing away.
"Blue it is then. Christine, what colour do you think would look good on La'an? I'm thinking a red or green, maybe even a purple," Oriana said, turning the table on Christine.
"I like red. I've always liked you in red," Christine said, winking at La'an.
"Why do you like her in red?" Oriana asked, trying to look innocent.
"It's very elegant, and it's the colour of blood – two things I enjoy," Christine replied, getting a look from both Oriana and La'an.
"You're a weirdo," Oriana said, going over to the synthesiser. "Let's see what options we have."
Watching out the corner of her eye as Christine gently touched La'an's shoulder, Oriana wondered how long it would take them to realise there may be something more between them. She had watched them over the last week, she had seen all the soft touches and how they'd move close to each other during movie nights. They were getting more open with one another, and if Oriana had her way, she was going to make them see it one way or another, no matter how long it would take her. They both needed someone, and since that first day in sickbay where Christine's eyes fell on La'an as she entered sickbay, Oriana felt something between them.
Scrolling through the limited options, Oriana found two options suitable for Christine, and only one red dress for La'an. "What do you think of these? I think this red gown for La'an, and I can't pick between these two for Christine," Oriana said, showing them the options.
"I like the first option for Christine. I don't think she wants to look like Elsa," La'an said, looking at Christine.
"I think I could pull off an Elsa inspired dress," Christine said, twirling on the spot. "But yeah, let's go with the first option."
"Okay, good. At least you'll both look good on the day," Oriana said, saving the two options to synthesise later on. "Don't get me started on vows, you two have to make it look and feel real, so I suggest you write something cute."
"Or we just follow the vows given to us on the day," La'an replied, pursing her lips together.
"We don't know what Orcaynian marriage ceremonies are like. I don't think we should plan anything just in case it upsets them and they make us go the long way round," Christine said, sensing that La'an was feeling uncomfortable.
"I also believe you still have some schoolwork to do," La'an said, pointing to the lone PADD on the couch.
"Ugh, you're no fun." Rolling her eyes, Oriana marched over to the couch and dramatically flopped on it, grabbing the PADD.
"I'm going to be on the bridge," La'an said, excusing herself.
"I'll join you," Christine replied. Following La'an, Christine let out a loud sigh as the door hissed closed behind her.
Sitting down behind the helm, La'an distracted herself with the controls and checked their course. Seeing Christine begin to go over the sensor data, La'an noticed the Orcaynian ship was already a day ahead of them.
"How're you feeling about this?" Christine asked, looking at La'an, realising she hadn't checked how she felt about the situation.
"About as happy as you are," La'an shot back, watching the expression on Christine's face fall. She didn't mean to upset her, she was still trying to process her emotions, but making Christine upset was something she never wanted to do. There was a part of her that felt sad when Christine was sad and she couldn't explain it or figure out when it started.
"I'll go help Oriana," Christine said, her lips pursed as she went to get up.
"Stay, please," La'an said, reaching for her hand. "I'm sorry for snapping at you, I didn't mean to. I'm still trying to process all of this, and Oriana picking out clothing didn't help. I'm sorry."
Sitting back down, Christine felt La'an give her hand a soft squeeze. "It's okay, just talk to me next time, please."
"Okay, I will try," La'an agreed, nodding her head.
Pulling her PADD off the top console, Christine brought up a sequence and smiled. "Do you want to see how the human genome changes to show our stripes?" Shuffling closer to La'an, she held the PADD between them and started the simulation, a small diagram in the corner beginning to transform, the stripes becoming visible.