Sakura

I couldn't do it.

How could I do it?

I can't kill her. I definitely can't kill him.

I stood still. Shaking as I held the kunai. The red-headed girl beneath me was so weak. How could I kill her?

I wouldn't. I clenched the blade tighter in my hand and braced myself.

But I can't hurt him either.

I knew that too well. I knew it the moment I made the decision that I was going to kill him. I knew I was blatantly lying to myself.

But I had to try. I couldn't let Naruto's burden of a promise grow stronger and larger so much so that it destroyed him. And it was destroying him. It has been. And for once, I refuse to sit on the sidelines and watch the terror unfold.

So I had to do something.

Yet, even when I get to this point, kunai in my hand, I know damn well, that even with all the power bestowed upon me at this moment, it means nothing in the end. It doesn't even matter, because once again, I'm the same, weak, helpless, lovesick little girl who whimpers in solitude and remains useless.

I wish I could do it. I could whip around, knowing Sasuke's right next to me. Right in my grasp, and just do something. Stun him, paralyze him, kill him.

But I'm not. I'm shaking, I'm clenching a small kunai with both hands because I'm so nervous and disoriented I just might drop the damned weapon.

I'm hopeless.

If I couldn't kill him, there weren't many options left here. He's found me out by now. I know that. His gaze is burning into the side of my head on my left. His chakra spikes more aggressively with each new heartbeat.

He knows.

I know too. He's not the Sasuke I know. He's not the Sasuke I remember calling me and Naruto "precious" to him. This is a broken, discarded, boy, whose bonds have been severed, and each day walks deeper and deeper into a pit of darkness.

Sasuke always said I didn't understand what it was like to lose someone I loved, but he was wrong. He has been ever since he left me on that bench. That night I didn't just lose someone I cherished and loved, I lost everything. Does he know my life and Naruto's life haven't ever been the same since then? Since someone, we cared about so deeply and held so dear to us walked out because we weren't enough?

And Sasuke may not be dead, but the boy I'm standing next to right now, isn't the Sasuke I poured my heart out to. I lost him. That Sasuke's dead.

And I loved him.

So yes, I do understand. I finally, finally understand.

And I still love him, regardless.

"Sasuke… don't—," the red-head below croaked and suddenly blue burst behind me.

Followed by the striking sound of lighting.

I didn't gasp or even blink, I knew it was coming. I knew the moment I froze this situation had only one outcome, one of us had to kill the other, and I can't kill him. I'd accepted my fate several moments ago.

An abrupt burst of pain jolted through every vein, muscle, and nerve as something cut straight through my chest.

I blinked. Stunned. I had expected him to kill me, I had. But a part of me almost didn't believe he really would do it. I believed for just a second that maybe, just maybe, he had only been threatening me.

I looked down and allowed the tears building up in my eyes to release as I gaped in awe at the bloody hand, still static-filled, that was now poking out of my chest.

Time moved slowly. I briefly noted the silent screams erupting from the woman before me. But Sasuke didn't move. We were frozen in our positions. My hands that once held steel were now hung loosely at my sides, kunai on the ground, and Sasuke's arm remained stuck through my body, not even a hitched breath coming from his side.

I didn't know what to do. I had never been this close to death, knowing it was inevitable. The tears streaming down my cheeks continued to fall until one landed on Sasuke's arm, and he flinched.

The jolt of his limb sent fire jolting through every inch of my form and I croaked out a sob lurching forward, clutching his hand at my chest.

Sasuke grunted and suddenly grasped my hip with his unoccupied hand, steadying me.

Shakily, he lowered our figures until we hit the rock, his legs spread apart, my form barely making its way between them, legs buckled underneath me.

The woman screeched louder, she glared at Sasuke and suddenly her head dropped silently. Presumably from his Sharingan.

Sasuke's grip on my waist tightened and I screamed in agony at the pain that once again coursed through me as Sasuke slowly pulled his arm from my chest.

I gasped and cried out a moan, lurching forward until Sasuke caught my front with his bloody arm and steadily stood slightly above me.

He lowered me so that I was lying on my back, and placed my head on his lap.

When I met his eyes for the first time in my slow demise, I didn't expect to see what I did:

Pain.

It was a feeling I was used to. One I deemed necessary these days. I didn't mind pain.

But what I felt now, was a sinister type of pain.

A pain I felt stabbed through my chest as I gazed down into the eyes of the girl on my lap. No. Not just a girl.

Sakura.

I've just killed Sakura.

Except I didn't kill her, I only began the process. Because she was still awake, and she was suffering. She was in pain.

So, so, so much pain.

The moment my hand hit her back I wanted to withdraw it. To reverse time. To rethink my actions, go back.

Go back, go back, go back.

Dammit, why didn't I fucking stop? Why couldn't I fucking stop?

I had killed Sakura. Sakura is dying in my arms. Because I've killed her.

I've murdered her. I murdered Sakura.

My mouth dropped open slightly in shock and I didn't know what to do. What had I done? What the hell had I done?

What had I become?

The emeralds born into Sakura's eyes peeked up at me. Her gaze bore into mine. Penetrating and convicting.

Tears streamed down her porcelain cheeks. As they trickled down her chin, soon a red tint mixed into the water, and I realized her mouth was bleeding, staining her usually dark pink lips.

It was the last straw. It all clicked at the moment. This is real. Sakura is dying. In my lap, by my accord.

I grasped the side of her face and stroked her cold cheek gently. "No," I whispered.

Her lip quivered and she choked a few sobs behind her throat, refusing to break eye contact. "No," I repeated.

She managed to raise her arm weakly and place a bloody palm on the side of my face and caressed the side of my jaw. "It's okay, Sasuke-kun." She whispered, her voice hoarse.

"No. Don't say that to me. This isn't happening Sakura." I panicked, now holding both sides of her fragile head, tracing the lines of her preciously designed face, and stroking the spring-tinted hair that spilled onto her forehead.

She smiled a sad smile. "I promise I forgive you, know that." She then said weakly and bit her lip through a gurgle of blood.

"No." I hissed. "No. Damnit Sakura why did you come here? Why the hell would you come here? Look what you did." I spat and leaned my head closer. Never unlocking my gaze from hers.

"I had to, I had to do something." She stuttered, and sniffed, strangling a sob and threatening blood. "I wanted to see if I could take Naruto's burden." She spoke forcibly. Fighting each syllable.

"Shut up," I demanded, yet softly.

I slightly took note of moisture building in my eyes and refused to acknowledge it. I studied her face, her green eyes, her plump, yet thinner lips, button nose, not insanely small like the models Naruto used to ravel about. All features are strange, yet so, so beautiful.

Why did I never tell her that?

I leaned closer, a tear escaping my eye as I pressed my temple against hers. "Sakura. I-,"

Her eyebrows furrowed together, and an expression of pure anguish and sadness engulfed her youthful features. She was crying harder, mouth opening despite her struggles, and blood oozed out as she whimpered. "It's, it's okay Sasuke-kun." She repeated-choking through the words.

"I didn't mean to." I gaped.

"It's okay." She said a little weaker and gripped my jaw more firmly, sliding her thumb back and forth across the bridge between my eyebrow and cheekbone, tracing the lining. "I forgive you."

Her eyes were striking then. So bright, filled with the last energy of her short-lived life. They sparkled in anguish and yet a sense of contentment. And they blinked, fanning her cheeks. Just enough for me to marvel at her contact.

I leaned in and shakily pressed my lips to hers, closing my eyes only for a split second. But it lasted hours. I put all my pent-up emotions and rage into that kiss. Finally showing Sakura in her last breaths, that yes, she did mean something to me.

Once I finally opened my eyes to look at her, guilt drowned me again. She squinted her eyes shut in another cry. "It's okay." She mumbled again. Seemingly soothing both herself and me now.

I blew air against her eyes, forcing them to look at me. She stared at me in pain and a revelation of her soon end. I continued to stroke her soft skin. "You're beautiful Sakura. You've always been beautiful." I said. My tears now matched hers as they flew down into her own, but quietly.

She smiled, and even though her lips were stained red, I found no sight more gorgeous.

All her relentless love for me is shown through her smiles.

"I'm sorry." I choked through a sob.

Sakura managed to pull my jaw down for another kiss and released me with a struggle for air. A genuine one.

"I love you Sasuke. I love you so much I can't stand it," she murmured. "You've never had to tell me your sorry."

I couldn't respond, just simply stare at her in remorse and sorrow.

She suddenly gasped in pain and her eyes grew wider as she lost eye contact, moaning in pain as she threw her head further back.

I grasped her tighter and used a hand to shut her eyes, caressing the lids and mumbling as softly as I could.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

For a few minutes, she continued to struggle under her pain, being coaxed by my touch, until eventually, she grew still silently.

Realization hit me. Harsh.

And so in a haze of guilt and anger, I dropped myself onto her lifeless chest and cried.