A/N: Hi guys. Long time, no see. I know this is another new story, and some of you want updates for the others. I could promise they're on the way, but I know with the amount of time it's been, it's hard to believe until you see proof. :P Bare with me, I'll update asap. Thank you so much for the patience, and feedback. It definitely means a lot to me. That being said, I LOVE Reddie, and this has been in my head for a while. Also, the timeline will jump just a tad, so be prepared. Enjoy!
Eddie was carefully eying him from across the room. He wasn't quite certain whether he was doing a bad job of being discreet, or if Richie was just that hyperfocused on the boy. He chuckled to himself, as it had to be the latter. Eddie had been the object of his affection for the better part of...well, as long as he'd known him honestly. As for the amount of time he'd been aware of these feelings...well, that was a substantially long time too.
Richie wandered over to the couch and slid down to sit on the floor against it. Around him, his friends were all in a bubble of contentment, arguing over bullshit monopoly rules and laughing. Save for Eddie, of course, who had given up early in the game, his fuse proving to be shorter than usual. No one questioned him, even Richie, though that wasn't such a shock to the losers on this particular occasion.
A mere three weeks before, Eddie had suffered a loss in his family. It was a great aunt, to be more precise. She was thought to be a lovely woman, but he never got to meet her. However, that fact didn't allow him to decline the familial obligation of attending her funeral, spending a horrid two weeks several hours outside of Derry, and away from his friends.
Although this was not the reason for Eddie's sulky attitude. His grandmother had the delightful idea to come and stay with them. She wasn't much worse than his mother, he could handle that double dose of drama. But noooo. She had decided to drag along his aunt, and three cousins. Elana, Erica, and Sandy. The two girls were camped out in the living room, while Eddie was lucky enough to get to share his room and bed with Sandy.
Eleven years old, bright orange hair, criminal mastermind in the making as far as Eddie was concerned. And the world's biggest snitch. This meant that for the entire length of their stay, he had to adhere to curfew, spend a respectable amount of time entertaining his cousin, and could not by any means sneak out at night. The punishment he would endure if his mom only knew exactly how often he snuck out caused so much internal cringe.
"I'm not feeling so good. Too much popcorn, I think. I'll be back." Eddie said abruptly. He stood up and charged for the bathroom, giving Richie a look as he made his way around the couch, his back facing the others. No one else took much notice, it was pretty normal for Eddie to react oddly to snacks he wasn't usually allowed to have. Richie waited a few minutes, trying not to be so obvious before he got up and followed Eddie to the bathroom.
"I'm gonna go check on him, guys." He said, dropping his piece back into the box, having lost the last of his money a few turns back, somewhat on purpose. Hearing no objections, or interest at all in what he was saying or doing, he went to the door.
He knocked quietly. "Eds?" He murmured softly.
"Rich?"
"Yeah, it's me."
The door flew open without hesitation, and Eddie swiftly pulled him inside, shutting the door behind him with a soft click.
Richie attempted to make a dirty joke, but was cut off by Eddie grabbing his shirt collar and roughly pulling him into a kiss. Richie gasped, being taken off guard like that. Normally he was the rough one in these situations. Granted, they'd only found the time to wind up like this on a handful of occasions. Eddie pulled back, but kept his shirt securely wrapped in his fingers.
Reading his mind as always, Eddie whispered, "No jokes. Just kiss me." The urgency in his voice both alarmed and thrilled Richie. It was a no questions asked tone, so Richie asked no questions. He placed his hands against Eddie's hips and backed him into the door, butterflies erupting in his stomach at the intense fire that began to dance in Eddie's eyes as he did so. Moving one hand up to cup his face, Richie leaned down to recapture his lips. He sighed happily at the now somewhat familiar feeling.
Richie wasn't sure where Eddie's sudden boldness came from, but he definitely didn't mind. They'd never gotten too far, they'd never even truly made out. For one, this was new territory for them both. Not only had they never kissed another boy before, they'd never kissed anyone before. Hell, they'd only decided to act on the desire to kiss each other a mere month beforehand. With all of the chaos dwelling in Eddie's life and home, they hadn't had any time to focus on, or truly discuss, what they were feeling for each other. They'd had to temporarily table all of it. Yearning glances, whispered conversations. Stolen, rushed, passionate kisses.
It was always sweet before. Gentle, loving. Weary and explorative, but definitely still passionate kisses. Until Richie's long-lasting feelings would overwhelmingly bubble up, causing him to push for more than either of them were ready for. Each time he would brush his tongue against Eddie's, it would scare them both. They'd freeze. Unfortunately, Richie didn't know if Eddie felt that it was just too much too fast, or if the conveniently constant interruptions each time they'd been alone had just spooked him.
Either way, it was clear he wasn't scared now, as Eddie was the one who slid his tongue against Richie's this time. Taken aback for the second time that night, Richie gasped again. But he didn't freeze. He left his mouth open and met Eddie's tongue with his. Both of them shivered as they explored each other's mouths, reveling in this new, intriguing feeling. Before he knew it, Eddie's hands were in his hair, and his own had slipped up the back of his shirt, palm against his warm skin, pulling him against him. Their previous kisses, they'd maintained a respectable distance with the rest of their bodies. Now, there was no distance.
Feeling brave, Richie took Eddie's lower lip between his teeth, grazing lightly. The noise that came out of Eddie's mouth took him off guard for the third time that night. It wasn't the noise itself though, it was his body's reaction to it. Even though it was almost physically impossible to be any closer, Richie pulled Eddie harder against him, kissing him again before bringing his mouth down to the side of his neck, and placing a few gentle bites down to his collarbone.
"Ohh...Oh, oh my G-god..." Eddie panted quietly. Richie glanced up just in time to see his eyes rolling into the back of his head. As much as he wanted to continue, he still wasn't sure where Eddie's mind was, and he didn't want to push too far even if Eddie had technically started it. Whatever was happening with them, he was sure if Eddie was thinking clearer, he wouldn't want it to happen in Bill's bathroom.
He was attempting to calm himself down, and had done a decent job...until Eddie pulled his hair. He didn't know that was a thing for him, but it sent him into overdrive. He moaned, probably a little too loudly, and desperately reconnected their lips. His body was on fire, every inch aching to get as close as possible -
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
They sprang apart, their lips making a loud pop noise, shock evident in both of their eyes as they stared at each other. Whether from the situation, or the likely fact that they'd been caught in the situation, neither knew which.
"Guys? Everything okay?" Bev's voice came from the hall. "You've been in there a while."
Getting themselves together as best as they could, Richie spoke first.
"Yeah, all good. Eds is just a little sick. Getting him cleaned up now."
"Not pretty in here, Bev. Not pretty at all." Eddie agreed.
"It's very pretty in here." Richie mouthed to Eddie, winking. Eddie rolled his eyes, but smiled.
There was a long pause before she answered. "Okay, just wanted to check. We'll be out here." They listened as her footsteps faded away, and then let out the breath they'd both been holding. Shyness got the better of them, the moment having passed, but leaving pretty obvious evidence in both of their pants. Red in the face, they respectably kept their gazes eye level as they gave themselves a minute for their heart rates and excitement to dwindle down.
"Walk me home?" Eddie whispered, still slightly out of breath.
"Of course, Eds."
"Or...your house?" Eddie offered, hesitantly. "I can't stay long, naturally. But I have a little time before curfew."
"Okay, yeah. We'll just tell them I'm walking you home."
"Exactly."
A comfortable silence befell them as they busied themselves flushing the toilet and running the water to cover their tracks. Eddie made a move for the door when they were done, but Richie stopped him. A smile replaced his confusion as Richie placed one last, gentle kiss on his lips.
"Ready?" Richie asked him.
"Ready."
"I feel a little guilty lying to them." Eddie admitted, as the pair walked their bikes down the familiar road to Richie's.
"Yeah..."
"I just feel like...we haven't really had any time to talk about things. I want us to talk first, and get everything out on the table before anyone else sticks their noses in our business, ya know?" He continued, eyes glued to the ground.
Everything so far, physically, had been easy. They knew they were attracted to each other, there was no doubt about that. Feelings were messier. Conversation was harder. They'd always been good at talking to each other, or so they thought. Turns out, subject matter has a lot to do with that. Sure, there had been a lot of long, late night talks in their past. They were best friends. They'd experienced severe trauma together. They were good at being good to each other when the situation called for it. Usually, the situation called for comfortable banter, and occasional heart to hearts that had nothing to do with how they felt about one another, until now.
"I get it. I'm where you are." Richie replied. He wanted to be careful with this. Having had deep feelings for his friend for as long as he could remember, messing this up was the last thing he wanted to do. He had matured in a lot of ways, though he kept his front up. He stayed the class clown, but deep down there was so much more to him. In a way, he was grateful to their shared trauma for helping him realize so much about himself. He knew the best way to go about this was to be completely honest, leave no details spared. There was a lie he was going to have to unveil, and it was going to be hard. Eddie deserved to know, though.
They made it to Richie's in just a few short minutes. Richie didn't live far from Bill. Richie squinted into the distance, partially blinded by the close to setting sun.
"I don't see my dad's truck, we should be good to go through the house."
"Cool, I'm still a little scraped up from that last climb."
"That's not going to stop you from climbing again in the future, is it, Eds?" Richie inquired, raising his brow at the shorter boy.
"Of course not, how else will we see each other when one or both of us is always grounded?"
A loud, masculine yell from inside the house cut Richie's retort short. Glancing around the side of the house, Eddie spotted Richie's dad's truck parked next to the back fence.
"Window, now!" He said, grabbing Richie's arm and ushering him to the opposite side of the house where his bedroom window was. They clambered up to the ledge, and let themselves in, Richie immediately going to his door to close and lock it.
Eddie flopped down on the bed with a deep sigh. "That could've been bad."
"Definitely. Good eye, Eds. Eds?" Concern immediately present in his voice, Richie stumbled over to sit next to Eddie, who was now sobbing, a look of pure terror etched on his face. Richie grabbed at Eddie's pockets in search of his inhaler, Eddie long ago abandoning his signature fanny pack. He found it without much trouble, and put it up to the other boy's mouth, rubbing soothing circles on his back.
Eddie's breathing slowed after a few puffs, and he leaned into Richie, just letting him hold him.
"Eds?" Richie whispered softly after a few minutes had passed.
"I'm sorry, Rich. I just...I was thinking about your dad. And then I thought...about my mom." He started. Still confused, Richie urged him to continue. "I want...I can't...we can't...Ugh!" He sighed in frustration, his normally broad vocabulary failing him.
"Shh, it's okay. Take your time." Richie comforted him, continuing to rub his back.
"My mom can't know." Eddie finally said. "If she knew I was...gay. She'd have me committed. If she knew I wanted to be with you, we'd never see each other again. It's not fair." Realization came over Richie. And understanding. And then anger. He hadn't thought about that.
The feelings were so intense, especially when it became known that Eddie was feeling them too. That was all that had been on his mind for weeks. Eddie felt the same way, or was at least starting to. Eddie wanted to be near him. Eddie wanted to spend time with him. Eddie wanted to kiss him...The short list of memories they'd already shared flashed through his mind as he watched Eddie's expression steadily deflate. Neither of them had thought about what other people would think. In all honestly, Richie didn't care what anyone would think. What other people could do was an entirely different thing. Eddie's mother was just crazy enough to pull something drastic. Eddie was right, she couldn't know.
He turned Eddie around to look at him, the pair moving to sit cross-legged in front of each other.
"She doesn't have to know. Not yet." He wiped a fresh tear off of Eddie's face. "No one needs to know. Like you said, we need time to figure things out, just us. I'm sure we're going to want to tell the others, but we don't have to right now. And even if/when we do, they're not going to tell anyone. The way I see it, you have less than two years until you're eighteen, and then what can she do? Not a damn thing." He braced himself for what he was about to say. "I want to be with you. And if we're getting everything out on the table as you said...I've had feelings for you for a long time."
"How long?" Eddie whispered, his lack of a poker face revealing his surprise.
I've said it, now I gotta push through. Richie thought to himself. He took a deep breath, and elaborated.
"Um...three and a half years, that I've actively known." Eddie's eyes went wide. "But I think I may have always felt this way. I just didn't know it until...well... So, I lied to you guys. Remember when I said I never had my own separate experience with...It?" Bringing It up was usually a no-no in the group, but Eddie didn't even flinch. He needed to hear this, and Richie had clearly needed to say it for some time.
Eddie swallowed his internal fear, and pushed for him to continue. "Yeah."
"That's not entirely true. I went to the arcade one day. I played an excessive amount of Street Fighter, everything was normal. I played with this boy I'd never met. We had fun, a lot of fun. Or I did. He seemed to enjoy it too, so I asked if he wanted to keep playing. Then Bowers came in. Turns out the other guy was his cousin, and they both started calling me a...a faggot, and a fairy. Kicked me out of the arcade."
"Oh, Richie." Eddie said, taking Richie's hand in his.
"That's not the worst of it. That's when It came. I was cornered, right outside of the arcade. By this revolting, evil thing. Threatening to tell my secret, one I didn't even know I had until that day. Maybe that's why I was the last one. Because I didn't know what I was afraid of until it was in my face. And then...later, back at the house. I ended up in that room full of clowns, remember? That wasn't what made me go in there. It...It was mimicking you. I thought you were in there even though you'd just been right next to me. I thought It had you." He tightened his grip on Eddie's hand, and Eddie squeezed back reassuringly.
"And then...the casket. There was a casket, with a doll in it. One that looked exactly like me. That was the real fear. Coming to terms with who I am. Opening myself up to...everything that comes with being...gay."
Eddie didn't speak, not at first. Richie kept his eyes closed and his head down, much like he had after their first kiss.
"I'm sorry, Eds. I'm not meaning to freak you out, I just wanted to be completely honest with you."
"Richie, please look at me." Eddie asked, again mirroring their first kiss. Richie did so, and felt immediate relief wash over him. Eddie was smiling.
"There's nothing to be sorry for, Rich." Eddie moved over to sit beside Richie, scooting them back to lie down, cradling Richie's head to his chest. "I want this too." He whispered. "I think on some level, I've always known I felt this way. But to be honest...I didn't know for sure until about three months ago."
A/N: Chapter Two will start as a flashback, and we'll see how their relationship began ^_^ For now, thank you for reading!