It was one fifty seven at night, and rain pelted the windows of Angel's office as he sat slumped at his desk, head pillowed on his arms, cheek pressed to the page of the book he'd been reading before he'd dozed off. It wasn't like him to fall asleep at his desk, but ever since Doyle died he'd been plagued by nightmares, and more often plagued by memories of his dead friend, so at the minute he'd take what rest he could get.

It had been a week since Faith turned herself in, a week since he'd left Sunnydale, left Buffy behind with her new shiny Soldier Boyfriend. Ugh. He really didn't like that guy. He had to face it: he'd never like any guy that Buffy dated, any guy that wasn't him.

As if his thoughts seemed to conjure her, Angel opened his eyes to find the one and only Buffy Summers leaning in the open doorway, a serenely contemplative gleam to her features.

"I'd forgotten how peaceful you look when you're asleep," she whispered, voice barely audible over the rain. "Like nothing could ever bother you."

"Yeah, well, a lot of things bother me when I'm awake," he straightened up, running a hand through his hair in a weak effort to look more presentable. Even at two in the morning, Buffy still looked pristine and put-together and as beautiful as ever. "And I'm guessing something's bothering you, otherwise you wouldn't be here." He waved a hand, gesturing to the vacant seat. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I do," she admitted, folding herself into the chair in a graceful swoop, staring up at the ceiling rather than looking at him, as if it was easier for her to get the words out this way, "but I'm not sure where to start."

"How about anywhere but the middle?" Angel jokingly advised. "Otherwise I'll be real confused and keep interrupting you with questions."

She glared at him under her long lashes. "You're really not helping here."

He smiled encouragingly. "Just tell me what's on your mind, Buffy."

He missed saying her name. He used to say it all the time, whether in love or anger or warning or amused exasperation, a desperate plea as she stabbed him or an embarrassed exclamation when she'd sneak up on him and steal his sketchbook when he was drawing. Nowadays, he hardly ever said it, he didn't have reason to: they weren't a part of each other's lives anymore, but she was still a part of him, a part that was alive and well, and would forever remain so.

"It's about Riley."

That stopped him in his tracks.

Angel cleared his throat, approaching carefully, "What about him?"

"He did something. Something I can't believe, or forgive, or fix. Something that every time I think about it, I feel like I'm gonna break."

He was out of his chair in a flash, grasping her chin and tilting her face towards him. "Tell me what he did." The words were hardly more than a growl, and he wanted to punch the living daylights out of the kid for putting such sadness in her green eyes.

Buffy curled her hand around his as she began in a tear-laden whisper, "Remember when Faith switched bodies with me?"

Angel nodded.

"Well, it took a while for everyone to catch on. Actually, no one really caught on except for Tara, because she could see my aura: I had to go to Giles and explain. But by then, the damage was already d-done," she stuttered harshly, "and after we switched back I-I found out that Riley had slept with her, thinking she was me. We hadn't-hadn't before that and yet-yet he didn't even notice that anything was wrong, that it wasn't me. He says he cares about me, but you have to know someone to care about them, right? And yet when Faith showed up -in a frickin' black leather top thing and my mom's lipstick in a shade I'd never wear- he couldn't even tell it wasn't me!"

She broke down, sobbing uncontrollably in his arms. He held her, through every second of it, he held her, and and there wasn't any force in the world in that moment that could have made him let go.

"I'm sorry," untangling herself from his embrace, Buffy twisted her hands in her lap. "I know it's not fair to just come in here like this, at this hour, and just expect you to drop everything 'cause I'm having boyfriend issues."

"Hey," Angel soothed, straightening out a lock of her hair, "when have I ever not wanted to help you, time of day be damned?"

"Yeah, but we were together, ergo romantic obligations."

He shook his head, admitting softly, "If you look back, I think you'll find I wanted to help you with your problems long before we even had our first kiss."

"True. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do," Buffy confessed, and he hated seeing her so rattled by some guy who obviously didn't deserve her if he didn't even know her, "how I can get past this and move forward. I don't think I can ever forgive him."

He hated to ask, but he has no other choice. "Do you want to forgive him? Do you really want to give this guy a second chance after he hurt you, betrayed you so badly?"

She fixed him with a knowing look. "Who would I be if I didn't give guys a second chance?"

"Exactly. Look how i turned out."

"You never meant to hurt me," Buffy protested, albeit weakly.

"But I did it anywhere. I hurt you by leaving, by taking the decision out of your hands, by thinking I knew what was best for you, for us. I just wanted you to have everything that you deserved."

"And look how that turned out."

Ah, using his own words against him: he'd taught her well.

"He's nice. He knows my secret and he'd okay with it, he can take care of himself and he's thoughtful and considerate he makes me smile..."

Angel fought to keep the frown off his face. "But why do I sense a 'but' coming?"

"Because there is one," she replied forlornly. "'But...' I don't love him. There's nothing wrong with him...there just isn't enough of him that feels right, like we fit. Even with the whole Initiative thing, he still sees the world in black and white: I don't. Not ever, and certainly not after everything I went through with you. Even Spike -Spike, of all people- has actually tried to be decent recently, and I think that matters. Not all demons are bad, not all people are good. We all have parts of each, yet he can't see that. And I'm afraid, afraid that we'll come to blows over something and I won't hold back. Because I have. He wanted to see what my skill level was and I pretended to be lesser than I am. And I shouldn't have to do that. I never did it with you, or when I trained with Giles, or hell, even in Gym Class when we did self-defense; I floored that guy! Literally!

"So, you see," Buffy finished, "there's just a million and one little things that have been going on under the surface, but the Faith Thing is the straw that broke the relationship camel's back."

Angel leaned back, fiddling with a pen on his desk that kept trying to roll off. "Wow. That's...a lot. Do you want my verdict?"

She splayed her hands wide. "The stage is yours, o wise one."

He grinned, tapping the pen against his palm. "When I met the guy, I instantly didn't like him, for obvious reasons. But...he seemed to genuinely care about you, and I figured that was enough reason not to kill him. At the end of the day, you and I both know that relationships are built on trust. You trusted that I'd never hurt you, right?"

Buffy nodded heavily.

"And I trusted you not to stake me, or worse, break my heart."

"I guess I kinda ruined that when I stabbed it," she remarked, guilt still plain in her eyes, even after all this time.

"No," Angel assured her, "you might have stabbed it, but you never once broke it: I was the one that did that to you. What I'm trying to say is that...if there was doubts already, they were probably there for a reason, and it's better to know it's not going anywhere now than to force it into going somewhere later."

She seemed surprised. "What, you mean like marriage? Who would ever want to marry me?"

God, did she not know she was killing him here? It made him the world's biggest fool, but he told her, "Me. I would marry you in a heartbeat, if I had one. I used to think about it, all the time."

"Me, too. I wouldn't have minded being Mrs O'Connor."

"Nah, you'd have kept your name: you're too good for mine." Sitting back down, he let out a long sigh. "So...I guess that's it. You're gonna go home and break up with him."

"Its the right thing to do. I can't force myself to feel something that isn't real. Thank you, by the way, for listening, for being here."

Angel smiled warmly. "It's my job, but for you its on the house."

Buffy smirked, "How generous of you." She turned to go, but something stopped her, urged her to turn back one last time. And it was a question, just one, simple question, with an even simpler answer.

"Would you have-"

Angel knew what she was asking, and he knew he truth in his words. "Yes. Of course, yes. You don't even have to ask."

That seemed to satisfy her, to confirm something for her, something he hoped she'd already known in her heart.

"Do you want to know how I knew? How I knew I didn't love him?"

He did. "How?"

Buffy replied, "I know the difference between 'for now' and 'forever.' And I always will."

How could he let her go? How could he let her walk out that door and *not kiss her?

He couldn't, so he didn't.

"This doesn't make a difference," Buffy insisted despairingly, "this doesn't change anything."

"It does. Now I know the difference between a life with you in it, and one without, and let me tell you, I smile a hell of a lot more in the first one."

"Does that mean..."

He gripped her by the shoulders, looking at her with all the intensity he possessed, "It means you're gonna go home, you're gonna break up with Riley, and then you're going to call me."

"Why?"

Angel gave her a crooked grin. "So I can take you out to dinner, of course. So I can show you what it's like when love feels right."

Author's Note: Hello, Bangel fans! Welcome to another one-shot were I shamelessly put down Riley Finn and put Buffy and Angel back together, as they should be. Because, let's face it, we all know the truth: Angel would have known, in one second, with one look, that that wasn't Buffy. I rest my case.

Anyway, thank you so much for reading, and if you'd like to leave a review I will read it most happily.

Have a lovely evening everyone!

All my love, Temperance Cain.