Night terrors. They had been the bane of Denny Crane's life ever since his friend had begun to experience them in the depths of non-REM sleep. Terrified of running off the balcony of a fourteenth floor hotel room, Alan had begged his good friend Denny to sleep in the bed with him, so that if he ran off the balcony somebody could save him. So it was a shame that Denny slept like a log. As a method of getting him to stay, they had tried to tie themselves together, with interesting results concerning midnight trips to the bathroom. So, as a Christmas gift, he decided to get him something he really needed – a prostitute.
"Alan, we're having a party." Denny announced, just as Alan picked up his book.
"Is that a statement?" He flicked languorously to his page, and slid a finger down to the last word he'd read. He was used to Denny's sudden impulses, and knew how to handle them.
"Yes. And it's going to be here."
"Oh really." Alan laid the book down. "And did it ever occur to you that this is my room, and that I might not be in a party mood on that particular night?"
"Let me rephrase. We're having a party, here, in a week. And there's someone I would like to introduce you to."
"Contrary to popular belief, I'm not that lonely. The answer's no, Denny."
"Be a sport, Alan. You might have fun, meet a nice girl…"
"This is about us sleeping together, isn't it? I have to admit, I'm affronted. I share my bed with you, and this is the thanks I get."
"I'm fed up with sleeping with you, Alan. So I've arranged for a… friend of mine to come and see you."
"Oh, God. She's a hooker, isn't she?"
"If she was, would you say no? I mean, I have a picture…" Delving into a drawer, Denny pulled out a picture of a young woman with a head of red curls and beautiful green eyes. She was wearing a slinky emerald dress, and smiling at the camera with a pleasantly wide, lipsticked smile. Alan raised an eyebrow.
"Who on God's green earth is she?"
"Let's just say… we go way back."
"I'm not meeting with anybody I know you've slept with Denny. I'm low, but not that low."
"I didn't sleep with her, Alan. I slept with her mother, but not her."
"That makes me feel so much better. Name?"
"Tania. She's really very nice you know." Alan sighed.
"Will it shut you up if I do?"
"Naturally. Just say hello, see if you could be bed buddies, and then we could settle a price."
"So then she is a hooker? The deal's off."
"Too late, you agreed."
"I did not, I –"
"Goodnight, honey." Denny stretched over Alan, and with the gentle pull of a cord plunged the room into darkness.
A/N and Disclaimer: I don't have anything to do with Boston Legal. That's the only time I'll say that.
First 'Boston Legal' story I've ever done. Hope you like the beginning! Please R + R.
