Shadow Clan used to stand, or sit down, for something more than honor. It used to stand for honorjima as well. Spirit Ninja thought with discernment about this axiom while grocery shopping prior to his weekly professional murder / side hustle.
"What is a shadow clan ninja of the third lunar ball supposed to do?" asked Spirit Ninja aimlessly at his own reflection in a window overlooking frozen yogurt.
Just then, which was sudden and inexplicable, suddenly there were Fiesta Clan Ninja surrounding Spirit Ninja. One was dressed as leader and he smoke in a most machismo manner. "Ahoy, Spirit Nin'ja it be ye time ta die an' I'a-reckon that ye be puttin a mighty good show on for us!" The leader took out a spartan sword. "YAR!"
Spirit Ninja put up a stop hand gesture. "I'm feeling threatened and you hurt my feelings!"
The leader stopped the fiesta clad ninja from assault. "It be an oman! Ye be woke? Ore wat not thee fighten wit d'tha sword?"
Spirit Ninja slowly took out his phone and opened Instagram. "I'll make an exaggerated post on social media and leverage legal resources till you leave me the fuck alone."
The leader held his head down in depression. One of the other fiesta ninja inched forward "bu-but we had a blood feud? Why can't we try to solve or differences peacefully through murder?"
Just then a big fat body-positive smelly ninja walked into the scene. He was also clearly of the fiesta clan but had a sash over his chest indicating some shit. All the other fiesta clan ninja bowed.
Fat ninja spoke with angry conviction in response to the other ninja. "That was not simply a blood feud. It was a personal matter which I don't wish to discuss."
Spirit Ninja shrugged his shoulders "I fucked his mom."
"ARGHHH!" shouted fat ninja. "That action caused me to feel emotionally detached from my mother and question my eharmony account!"
"Let us settle this like men!" exclaimed Spirit Ninja.
Fat Ninja's eyes winced with extra anger. "What did you have in mind?"
"Um, well I don't know…" Spirit Ninja rubbed his shoulder. "Something, anything, that a man would do. But I don't know about you I kind of want to avoid violence. Plus also when I said let's settle this like men I guess the sexist response would be well he must mean violence, but I could have meant needle point."
"Did… you mean needle point?"
"No…"
One of the fiesta clan ninja came over and whispered into the fat ninja's ear for a brief moment. Spirit Ninja waited patiently. The fat ninja nodded his head and farted. "I have just been given a second option by my lowly man servant."
"Which is?"
Fat ninja took out a gun and fired a round into Spirit Ninja. "I can settle this like a cunt."
Spirit Ninja tumbled forward "that -also sex-ist." He fell in a heap.
Fat ninja grinned. Spirit Ninja tried to whisper. Curious fat ninja bent down so he could hear Spirit Ninja's final words.
Faintly Spirit Ninja managed a few more meager words "...settled, like your mom's cunt."
"AAAA!" fat ninja screamed and shot Spirit Ninja several more times.
