Christina distractedly pulls her car into the driveway of the house. Her mind turning over thoughts of the autumnal equinox again and again. She begins visualizing all of the steps of her spell, start to finish. Christina kills the engine and reaches over to the passenger seat of the Bentley to grab her purse and a paper bag of purchases for the equinox. A light just outside of the corner of the blonde's vision pulls her attention away from her ruminations. She exits the vehicle and turns fully toward the stately house, noticing a light coming from the parlor.
Ruby was home.
She could laugh. Home. This wasn't their home. Hers or Ruby's. This was temporary. A place to rest their heads while they waited for the next thing to happen. For Christina, the next thing was immortality. For Ruby, well, only Ruby knew that for sure, she supposed.
Christina walked towards the front door. Trying not to think about the woman in the parlor on the other side. Ruby, her housemate, near confidante, and sometimes lover, was a subject she tried not to dwell on. Thoughts about her current housemate were securely tucked away inside a mental box marked "to to deal with after the equinox." Said housemate being home now inconveniently led her to peek inside the Ruby related thoughts stored in the corner of her mind.
Ruby complicated things. Oddly enough, her feelings about Ruby weren't very complicated. She was attracted to her. Enjoyed spending time with her, enjoyed teaching her magic, enjoyed fucking her. Part of her knew, hoped maybe, that there was a place and time where their society would also see her feelings for Ruby as uncomplicated. But now in 1950s America, two women sharing a life together, going to bed together, wouldn't just be a scandal, it would be criminal. A colored woman with a white woman too, and both engaged in witchcraft to boot. She could imagine the headlines. "White Woman uses Magic to Pose as Man to Seduce Negro Lady." And that would just be the colored press. McCarthy would personally haul them to D.C. so he could do the honor of tying them to the stakes and lighting the first match himself. Christina shakes her curtain of blonde hair at the absurdity.
No, her feelings for Ruby weren't complicated, the world made how she felt about Ruby seem complicated. Her own ambition, however, did complicate things. She wanted Ruby, yes. She wanted immortality more. She wanted power even more than that. She was willing to remove by force any obstacles standing in the way of her achieving her goals, including Leticia and Atticus. That was another point of friction in their relationship. Ruby's desire for Leti and Tic, to a lesser extent, to not be harmed clashed with Christina's need to possibly harm the two in the process of fulfilling her destiny.
She found herself turning the handle then pushing the door open. The darkness and hum of night sounds transformed into the brightness of the foyer along with the sound of music coming from the parlor. Jazzy saxophone, bouncy piano, a gravely man's upbeat voice singing,
I know the night time
Whoa, is the right time
To be with the one you love, now
I said to be with the one you love
Christina hesitates, deciding which direction to go. She had planned to research and recite spells until she fell asleep on the basement floor. At least that had been her habit since Ruby left days ago. She shifts her body weight in the direction of the basement before hearing her name called from the other room.
"Christina?"
Not Ruby's voice. No this was Hillary Davenport's voice coming from Dell's body. Christina places her purse and bag on a bench next to the door and lets her feet lead her to the entrance of the parlor. In the parlor she found Ruby, well Ruby as Hillary, crouched in front of what looked like a new record player. Christina wandered further into the room. The blonde watched the other woman's fingers fiddle with the record player's knobs until the lowered voices of the backup singers sang out,
Night and day
Night and day
Night and day
The music settled to a comfortable volume. Just loud enough to be enjoyed but not so loud as to drown out the sound of Ruby's words falling from Hillary's lips.
"It's called a record changer. It can play 3 records back-to-back without having to change them manually. I had to search for it everywhere. Read about it in a Marshall Fields' catalog. Had to drive all the way over to Calumet City to find this one, if you can believe it. I'm glad I went because that shop had all the newest soul records in stock. Etta James, Ray Charles, Nina Simone. All the popular Negro singers. It was a white record shop too. I'll never understand how white folks can love colored music so much then turn around and hate colored people so much."
Shaking her head, and standing, the woman finally turned away from her new purchase and locked eyes with Christina.
"Hello."
"Hello."
The two women greeted each other simply. Both knowing that either of them could say so much to the other. Both choosing not to in that moment.
A woman's voice shouts from the record player.
Tease me (night and day)
Squeeze me (night and day)
"Oh, and I found this." The short haired brunette says, as if just remembering something. She walks to a side table and gets a bottle of something, hiding it behind her back, then shimming forward to present the gift to Christina. Christina takes the bottle from the other woman's hands. Turns it over. Inspects it.
Ruby, the puppetmaster, speaks again, "I know you prefer this kind of scotch. Now I also know it's incredibly hard to find." She giggles a bit. "Turns out you can get just about anything in Calumet City if you ask the right questions and bat your eyelashes." Ruby says using Dell's tongue. Then demonstrates by widening Hillary's eyes and batting her mascara lengthened lashes.
The man's voice again comes from the record player's speakers.
Everyday is the right time (night and day)
Yeah to be with the one you love now (night and day)
The song ends. A mechanical clicking fills the silence between the two women as the record changer switches to the next album.
Christina was impressed that Ruby remembered the scotch. Not so much that she remembered her preferred drink, but that she cared enough to find it for her. Christina allowed a small smile at the thought of Ruby using the freedom she found in Dell's body to drive uninterrupted to hunt a treasure just for her.
The music starts again. Strings this time. The orchestra plays long, lazy notes before a woman's sharp voice cuts in.
Don't know why
There's no sun up in the sky
Stormy weather
Still looking at the bottle rather than the woman in front of her, Christina says, "Shall I pour us drinks?"
Her companion's eyes brighten as she gives a short nod in agreement.
Christina walks to the bar cart. She can feel eyes on her as she prepares their drinks. She drops ice into two glasses then pours generous splashes of the prized scotch over the ice. With a glass in each hand the blonde walks back to Dell's body occupied by Ruby. Ruby had arranged her host's form on the couch with her legs sideways under the brunette's body. At Christina's approach, Dell's hands accepted an offered glass.
"Cheers." They each say while clinking glasses.
Christina walks the few short steps to sit in a chair near the other woman.
Each woman sips her drink quietly while Etta James sings.
When he went away
The blues walked in and met me
"Can I ask you something?" Ruby's words float from Dell's lips.
Christina considers Dell done up as Hillary. The woman in front of her was plain, even decorated with Ruby's keen eye. She was pretty, in a boring way. Like a Simplicity sewing pattern model. The blonde swirls her scotch and looks into the pair of eyes across from her own, "Of course." Gesturing toward her drinking companion in a manner that meant, "Ask away."
The weary voice of Etta James floats between them.
Since my man and I,
me and my daddy aint together
The brunette holds Christina's eyes before continuing, "Have you been with other women," a pause, "as William?"
Christina breathes in deeply, out slowly, licks her lips, pink tongue barely peeking out between lipstick free lips. She considers how much of the truth to tell, something she finds herself doing often with Ruby. Gauging how much of the truth to reveal, depending on what she wanted or needed. At the moment, she decides to simply go with the truth.
"Yes."
Dell's head nods once. The shorthaired brunette's mouth takes a sip of scotch before forming to ask Ruby's next question for her sometimes lover, "Have you ever been with another woman as yourself, Christina?"
"Yes." No hesitation this time. Just another simple truth from Ruby's interviewee.
Keeps raining all of the time
Oh, oh, keeps raining all of the time
Christina and the woman who is not quite Ruby drink together silently, listening to Etta James sing about stormy weather. Silence hangs in the room when the song ends. After a few soft clicks from the record player, the strumming of a guitar starts, then Etta James' voice is back.
Something told me it was over
When I saw you and her talking
Ruby closes Dell's eyes. She sways her head to the music then uncurls the bare feet from under her. She stands, downs the rest of her scotch and water, places her glass down on the side table next to Christina's chair, and presents a palm in offering to her seated housemate.
"Dance with me?" It's a request, not a demand.
Mirroring the woman in front of her, Christina throws back the dredges of her drink, accepts Dell's hand and rises with a small tug from the other woman. Christina still wears her heels, making her a few inches taller than her soon to be dance partner. Fingers now tangled lightly, the two women walked slowly toward each other. Finally embracing closely, but not tightly.
I would rather, I would rather go blind, boy
Than to see you walk away from me
They dance. Two steps. Back and forth. Side to side. Making a small box to the music. The shorter brunette trailed her arms down Christina's sides flirtatiously, and gently swayed their hips together to the beat. "We both know you know how to move your hips, Christina," She whispered teasingly into the taller woman's ear. Christina flushed, body warming at the flashes of memories of being with Ruby as William that first time and every time after. Her steps faltered. She felt the body in front of her recover their dance. They began building the box again together. This was Ruby, leading even while being led.
I was just, I was just, I was just sittin here thinkin'
Of your kiss, and your warm embrace
Christina reclaimed the lead, taking Dell's hand and gently twirling the body around to the music, so that the two women no longer faced each other. Christina drags Dell's body back against her, wrapping her arms around the woman's waist and lowering her head to the crook of Dell's neck. Christina closes her eyes and loses herself in the scent of Ruby's favorite perfume and yearns for the body in her arms to be Ruby's.
And baby, baby, I'd rather,
I'd rather be blind, boy
It may have been the scotch but with her eyes closed Christina can picture Dell's figure fully transform into Ruby's. She deeply imagines it's Ruby's body against hers now. She wills a transformation. Knowing that even she couldn't force a metamorphosis through sheer will alone, she was willing to accept the body Ruby was offering now. For now, for this, Dell would do.
Baby, baby, baby
I'd rather be blind now
Christina merges her reality with her imagination. In her mind she's pulling Ruby's body impossibly tighter against her own. Trailing her palms up either side of Ruby's pliant form. In her mind's eye she can see the hands currently drawing lazy patterns on Dell's torso, replaced with her hands caressing Ruby's lovely curves.
The record changer switches to the next album. Nina Simone's voice wails in confession.
I put a spell on you
'cause you're mine
Christina bites down on the neck below her mouth, eliciting a gasp that holds notes of Ruby's sultry undertones. She feels fingers moving through her hair, pulling just a bit. The hand in her hair moves and Christina feels both of her hands being covered by the shorter woman's. One hand coaxes Christina to lift the bottom of the dress Ruby had chosen for Hillary that day. Christina's other hand is raised to cover Dell's breasts. Christina squeezes, imagining the swell of Ruby's full breasts. The lower hand covering Christina's encourages her to explore deeper when she hesitates at the edge of the panties she finds under her lover's dress. Christina pushes further in, beginning a bolder exploration of the body in front her.
Christina shifts their bodies to allow her fingers to dip into her partner's wetness, and she was so wet. Wetter than Ruby had ever been for William, Christina knows. She parts her with index and middle fingers, using the heel of her hand to entice huffs and moans of pleasure from the other woman's mouth.
And I don't care if you want me
I'm yours right now
Suddenly Dell's hand covers Christina's again, pressing her lover's fingers deeper, demanding that she give it to her fast and hard, the way she knew Ruby liked it. She feels the roll of hips against her front, a roll she knew indicated her lover was close. She pictures Ruby's body in front of her grinding against her hand. It's Ruby meeting the thrusts of her fingers, inviting her in.
In the haze between reality and her imagination, Christina feels Ruby's hands everywhere. Gripping her hair, pulling hard. Reaching to grab her by the sides of her trousers, her backside, pulling them closer together. They each get lost in matching the other's quick, fervent, desperate pleasure seeking movements. Christina feels Ruby ascending with every stroke of her lover's fingers.
Oh, you hear me
I put a spell on you
A choked, "Christina, fuck" escapes from Ruby before she stiffens, finally giving into her release and collapsing into Christina's arms.
Christina comes crashing down from the heights of her hazy fantasy to be met with the reality of holding Dell's body, not Ruby's. No, her name didn't pass Ruby's lips. She couldn't deny it. With desire no longer clouding her judgment, she couldn't pretend anymore either.
Because you're mine
The song ends in fanfare with horns shrieking. The recorder player clicks. The room is silent, except for the measuring paces of each woman's breath. Ruby turns Dell's body in Christina's loosened arms. She angles for a kiss, hooded eyes focused on Christina's lips. Christina turns her face away nearly imperceptibly. Her eyes focused in on Dell's eyes, one of which began turning brown.
"You don't want to kiss me as Hillary?" Ruby voices seductively through Dell's lips.
Christina leans in. Taking in a slow breath over the painted lips. Co-mingling the air between their mouths. Instead of a kiss, Christina gently presses the two fingers she'd just used to bring Ruby to climax on the other woman's lips and plants a sweet kiss against her own fingers. If Ruby wanted to know what it was like to kiss her, they'd have to satiate that curiosity the old fashioned way. Drawing back and waiting a long few seconds until both eyes in front of her switched to brown, Christina says, "I want to kiss whatever you want me to kiss, Ruby." She turns, leaving the parlor. Ruby stands in the middle of the room looking after Christina, in Dell's body, with her fingers pressed against Hillary's red lips.
