One Year

Summary: Everyone wants "Old Blaine" back, but another tragedy is almost more than this Blaine can take. Just when he's at his breaking point, he meets two people who might be able to give him what he needs…a potential mentor and Sebastian's best friend.

Note: I played with the Glee timeline (again) and moved one of the stupidest plot devices in the series up a few years. As always, there is a method to my madness

I love Brittany & Santana but something happens with them that might upset some readers

Warning: Several characters suffering from Depression/Anger (in varying degrees) with manifestations such as co-dependency and physical violence


It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to November, turn around and make it all right
I'd go back to November all the time

The First 6 Weeks

His stages of grief raced past denial to anger the moment Burt Hummel confirmed Sebastian and Sam were gone. Brittany was a different story because there was no stage for her to work through.

Sam's death shattered her

The evening of the accident, when Sam was late and not answering his phone, Brittany believed he blew off their date so Blam could do some nerdy shit. Since Santana was in town, she invited her ex (but still bestie) over to listen to her vent.

They wound up having sex

The next day, Carole and Finn told Brittany (and Santana) what happened in the same manner Burt and Kurt did for him. However, with her (shall we say) interesting way of looking at the world, as well as being highly superstitious, Brittany convinced herself she was responsible for Sam's death because she slept with Santana.

She began having terrible nightmares (when she was able to sleep). By the third day, she was practically incoherent, and her parents threatened to hospitalize her.

Santana called, begging him to come see her.

He said no

Not because he didn't sympathize. He did. But being around people who hated Sebastian wasn't a good idea. He explained that to Santana even though he was under no obligation to do so.

She called him an asshole and hung up

Two hours later the 2012 New Directions graduates, plus Artie and Tina, were at his door. Brittany's parents had followed through on their threat and Santana was in total Lima Heights mode.

Cooper, who had dropped everything to be with him, told them all to leave or he'd call the cops.

At that moment, for some inexplicable reason, Finn thought it was a good idea to start (loudly) saying crap about Sebastian and how Blam were never really that close. Kurt, the only one to know the depth of his ex's feelings for the late Warbler, not to mention Sam, ran over to shut him up.

It was too late

Finn was already lying flat on the driveway, unconscious from one punch. "Blaine, seriously…violence? Why? It's so unlike you. Oh God, I think you broke his jaw!"

"Did you seriously think my baby brother spent all that time boxing for his health?" Cooper asked in response, trying not to laugh at the shocked faces before him. "Squirt, you got anything you want to add before I kick your former so-called friends off Mom's property?"

"Anyone else want to talk shit about Sebastian? No? What about Blam? Then fuck off. And don't call me Squirt."

Despite the drama, he did go to the hospital to see Brittany (and get his hand checked). A nurse had recently given her a sedative but she was fighting it, afraid to sleep. He climbed into her bed, wrapped her in his arms and promised he'd stay all night in case she had a bad dream. She didn't.

This wouldn't be the last time this happened

He and Brittany went to Sebastian's memorial service at Dalton together. Jeff and Nick had asked him the day before to sing something.

He declined

They went to Sam's memorial service but left when Brittany broke down seeing Sam's little brother and sister.

They both dropped out of Grease. Quinn covered Brittany's part and Kurt insisted on being Teen Angel (Blaine would want it that way…whatever). Finn was to take over for Sam but unfortunately (*cough*) his jaw was wired shut. Mike filled-in instead.

Not like all those parts didn't already have a present-day McKinley student as the understudy.

Due to the circumstances, the Show Choir Association gave both the New Directions and the Warblers automatic bids to Regionals based on past performances.

He and Brittany returned to McKinley full-time after Thanksgiving Break. It took three days for Brittany to let anyone else be her "buddy". He soon realized his idea of transferring back to Dalton for his final semester wouldn't happen.

It surprised everyone when they didn't return to Glee Club. Finn apologized for being an insensitive ass (supposedly his words but sounded more like Rachel's). It didn't sway them.

One day Mr. Schue less than subtly implied Sam would want them to return, frustrated by his dwindling numbers. The members who remained told their advisor he was an idiot but made a pact that what he said would never leave the room. Only Artie and Tina had been there when Finn's jaw was broken, but the rest knew the story.

And saw the results

Miss Pillsbury suggested dropping the topic until after the Christmas Holiday. Everyone agreed but it only delayed the inevitable. In January he'd tell them he was never going to sing again and it was none of their fucking business why.

Right now, he just wanted things to calm down, take care of Brittany and get through Christmas and New Year without completely falling to pieces…or punching someone.

December 31, 2012

Dalton burned to the ground

For the first time since November 8th he allowed himself to cry

2013 Begins

The loss of Dalton fueled his anger but Brittany still needed him to get through the day (and most nights). Was their co-dependency healthy? Hell, no! However, she was the only thing keeping him sane thanks to everyone at McKinley making the same New Year's resolution.

Bring Old Blaine back

Ok, that probably wasn't true but it sure as hell seemed like it.

Examples?

The first day (first…fucking…day!) back, Mr. Schue and Finn pulled him out his Literature class with the Greatest Idea Ever!

Mr. Schue could barely contain himself. "Call all your Warbler friends. You know, the ones who stayed in the area."

This didn't sound good. "Why?"

"To convince them to transfer to McKinley!"

"Yeah!" Finn was just as excited which usually led to him saying something stupid. Pity, it was only last week that he had the wiring in his mouth removed. "We'd have no problem keeping 12 members. Haven't they wanted you back since you transferred here?"

"Back at Dalton"

"But Dalton is gone so reunite here. We'll give you and the other Warblers the opening number like we did with the TroubleTones last year. And freedom to choreograph your own routines. And first choice of song, unless we want it for the final number. It's perfect! What do you think?"

There was only one answer

"Have the two of you lost your fucking minds?!"

Later that week, Tina and Sugar, the new Student Body President and Vice-President, announced a Sadie Hawkins dance.

Fucking great

After the initial shock from hearing the announcement, he remembered no one at McKinley knew the event that sent him to Dalton. Besides, the rumor was Tina and Sugar planned this entire dance to find boyfriends by Valentine's Day. No one would miss him and Brittany.

It couldn't be that simple

The very next day Tina had the girls of Glee Club help her with an elaborate number to ask him to the dance.

His first thought was this had to be a pity invitation…right? And what happened to the boyfriend plan? But Tina had had a not-so-secret crush on him since the first of the school year, even before he broke up with Kurt. Was this her agenda all along? Was he the boyfriend plan?

Did she honestly believe grief turned him straight or at least open to a relationship with a girl?

He did manage to keep his temper (and not swear) when he told her No thanks. She ran out of the room crying. He almost wished he cared.

The next week testing results came in from the college boards. He tested top 2% in the nation the first time but chose to take the test again. His entire life changed on November 8, 2012 and this was him adapting to his new future with an out-of-the-box plan.

His mother cried when he told her, and Cooper begged him not to do it. When it didn't work, and purely out of desperation, he called their father. Problem was the bastard had to care enough to talk to his youngest son and he didn't.

With a last name beginning with A, he was one of the first called to Miss Pillsbury's office to get his results. She congratulated him on a perfect score. She also told him she'd received notice of his early acceptance to both Julliard and Berklee and asked why he hadn't said anything.

He told her his plan and what he needed from her to complete it.

It took every ounce of Emma's resolve to not grab her (secretly) favorite student and shake him until he came to his senses. Of course, that was the absolutely worse thing she could do but there was no pamphlet for…So, you're in a deep depression because your BFF and the boy you loved both died. Now you want to destroy your future. What's your first step?

"Blaine, you already have early acceptance to two of the best colleges of music in the country. And aren't you a finalist at NYADA? You just want to give that all up?"

"I'm not giving it up, I'm adapting. It's too late to apply for the next academic year. But, with my perfect score on the college board and (eye roll) a pathetic personal story video essay, is that enough to switch my acceptance from Juilliard or Berklee to the main university at either Columbia or Harvard?"

A call interrupted their conversation. Emma hoped it was the one she was waiting for and if so, the timing couldn't be better. "Emma Pillsbury…You're here?…No, I'll be out in a moment." She immediately headed for the door. "I've got to take care of something urgent but stay here. I promise we'll discuss this further when I get back."

That was weird, but Miss Pillsbury was a little high-strung. He did wonder what, or who, was so important.

"Hello Blaine"

Not in a thousand years would he have guessed him. "Karofsky? What are you doing here?"

"Miss Pillsbury asked me to come see you." His ex's former tormentor sat in the chair beside him but the expected tension between the two never developed. "Technically, she called Dalton Administration, they still exist, just not on site. They called Jeff who called me then I called her back. And please call me Dave. Hearing you call me Karofsky in this place…I'm not that person anymore, Blaine."

WHAT? "Ok, Dave, why would Miss Pillsbury call Dalton who called Jeff…"

"Who called me?"

"Yeah"

"She guessed you weren't talking to anyone from Dalton about what you're going through…"

She did? That was…sweet? "I, I couldn't. They must hate me."

"The Warblers asked you to sing at the memorial. They asked you to come stay at Dalton for a few days, but you were with Brittany, which they understood. Why the hell would you think they hated you?"

"Because I killed Sebastian! He wouldn't have left that day if I…"

Dave took his hand and made him look him in the eye. "I want you to listen, really listen, to what I'm saying. Bas, Sebastian, didn't leave Dalton that day because of you. He left because of me. We had dinner together every Thursday."

No…no…NO! "You? You and Sebastian were dating?"

Dave laughed so hard he almost lost his breath. "That would have been a disaster. We became best friends after I…(his pause confirmed what he was unable to say)…after your Regionals last year. Although, we never could decide on a cool nickname like Blam."

His brain went into overdrive…but, but, but…"How? And Sebastian and I talked, for a little while after Regionals. He didn't say anything."

"Because you were still with Kurt, which made it super awkward at best. Bas and I made the decision not to say anything until the two of you were more stable in reestablishing your friendship." Dave reached into his coat pocket and pulled out an envelope. "When Bas heard you and Kurt broke up, he wrote you a letter. He wanted to express his feelings as well as explain a few things. It started off as cliff notes but as it grew he decided to make it a letter because, in his words, If I look into those eyes I'll become a big blob of goo and say something stupid."

For the second time since November 8th, he allowed himself to cry. "I loved…love him, Dave. I should have figured it out months ago. Did you know I was on my way to tell him when I found out what happened?"

"Niff told me."

Niff? He's closer to the Warblers than he thought. "I'm so angry, Dave. Angry I never got the chance to tell him how I felt and how it was my fault, as much as I try to blame Kurt." He closed his eyes and took a breath before he started crying again. When he opened his eyes again he heard a wisp of a voice say,You can trust him.

The words came spilling out. He couldn't have stopped if he wanted to.

"I'm not going to college for any type of performance arts. I've told a few people but I didn't tell them why. I can't sing anymore."

"Can't? Did you hurt your vocal chords?"

"No, it's…it's" No more tears, damn it! "I never got to sing with Sebastian and I don't want to sing to or for anyone else. I'm never singing again!"

Damn it! Tears! But these are leftovers from before! They don't count.

Dave sat quietly while he regained his composure. "Bas would hate he's the reason you don't sing anymore" he said once the tears stopped.

"I know, but…I just can't."

"Do me, and yourself, a favor. Don't say you'll never sing again. Say you'll sing when you're ready. Do it for Bas, the guy who thought you sang like a dream."

Wow, low blow. It was such a Sebastian move "You're playing dirty. Yes, I'll do it for Sebastian."

"Good, but I have one more favor. Don't read the letter until you're ready."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"You'll figure it out. But, if you can't make me that promise then I'll take back the letter until you can."

"I promise." He meant it. There was no way he was letting go of Sebastian's letter. "Do you have to go?"

"Yes. There's a big test in my evening class tonight. Some classmates put together a study group and it starts in an hour."

Dave's in college. That's nice. He seems to be in a good place. Is this what he meant by ready? "Before you go, can you answer 2 questions for me?"

"I'll try"

"Why weren't you at the memorial? Did I just not see you there?"

"I was on my way to Paris with Bas' mom and dad. It's where they took him to…"

That answered the question he was too afraid to ask. "Why Paris? I mean he loved it there but his parents are here."

"His mom's family has a huge plot right outside the city. It's actually quite beautiful. What's your second question?"

"Why do you call him Bas?"

A big smile overtook Dave's face. It must be a good memory. "When we were getting to know each other, he asked about my type. I told him someone like you."

Holy Shit! "Uhhhhh…"

"Oh my god! You should see your face! Bas had the exact same expression." This wasn't a good memory. It was one that could only happen with your best friend, like the ones with Sam he tells Brittany when she can't sleep. "Stop panicking, I said someone LIKE you. Short…"

"I'm 5'8"

"Like I said, short…compact. Someone to scoop up in my arms and cuddle with, protect them. I have a lot to make up for."

"Dave…"

"Blaine, it's ok. Bas and I talked a lot about our pasts and ways to make amends. Now, what was I…oh, yeah. As I said, Bas had the same reaction as you. When he finally understood what I meant his exact words were Good, because I'm the President, CEO and only Member of BAAAS…the Blaine Anderson's Ass Appreciation Society."

It was the first time since November 8th he remembered truly laughing. "Are you serious? Of course, you are. It's Sebastian we're talking about!"

"I shortened BAAAS to B,A,S as in Se-BAS-tain. He loved it, although he'd deny it if anyone asked."

"Do you, would you, mind if I called him Bas? I mean it is my ass."

"He always said you were the only other person he'd let do it for that exact reason." Dave glanced over to the clock on the wall "I'm sorry. I really do have to go."

"Can I maybe call you some time?"

"All my info is on back of the envelope. Bye Blaine"

When he was finally alone he clutched Sebastian's letter to his chest and whispered "Thank you, Bas."

And suddenly he was no longer alone

"Blaine Anderson, I presume. I'm…"

"I know who you are." Everyone, literally every person on the fucking planet, knew. "The question is why the hell do you know who I am and what are you doing in bum-fuck Ohio? Run out of major metropolises to destroy?"

"Technically, that's three questions, but I'll allow your faux pas this time."

"So kind of you, Mr. Stark. I will aim to do better in the future."

"You've got an attitude problem kid. I like it." The new arrival took the chair Dave was in earlier and dragged it to the other side of the office. "I need your help."

Huh? "You need my help? You're fucking Iron Man."

"Which doesn't seem to impress you"

"You don't use a light saber."

"I shoot beams of light out of my hands!"

"Not the same"

There was no rebuttal but the smile on the Avenger's face was pure Tony Stark. He leaned back in the seat and pulled out his phone.

"Blaine Devon Anderson born at OSU Medical Center in Columbus, Ohio on February 5, 1996. Father…Thomas, stockbroker and homophobic douche bag. Mother…Pamela, enjoys alimony and wine."

"Hey!"

"Brother…Cooper, actor, best known as winner of the first annual Razzie Award for commercials."

He wanted to defend Cooper, but those commercials are indefensible

"3.95 GPA. How did you get a C- in woodshop?"

"Almost cut off the teacher's fingers with a skill saw. He wanted to fail me but I offered to sing at his daughter's birthday to get the grade bumped to a C-."

"You must be good. Early admission to both Julliard and Berklee? Impressive."

"Doesn't matter, I don't sing anymore."

"I've heard"

"How?"

"In the words of Blaine Devon Anderson, doesn't matter."

Tony got up and shut the blinds before returning to his seat. "What does matter and the reason I'm in bum-fuck Ohio is because your friend Brittany drew some fascinating doodles on her college board exam. The person processing the exams knew enough not to throw them out and sent them to MIT."

Brittany?...MIT? "MIT, as in the Massachusetts Institute of…"

"Technology? That's the one. Turns out those doodles were some of the most complicated formulas in mathematics. What's even more mind boggling is she solved them."

"Brittany? Brittany S. Pierce? The girl repeating her Senior year because she had a 0.0 GPA? Who thinks her cat is a bookie for the mob and most days can't remember to wear underwear? That Brittany?"

"Egg-heads at my old Alma Mater swear she's got one of the greatest minds of this generation. However, they want to do more testing. That's where you come in. I heard about what happened last November…"

"November is none of your damn business."

"Sorry, I was told to tread delicately but unfortunately that's not my strong suit." Tony moved his seat to its original spot. "Listen kid, you're a smart ass but you remind me a lot of, well, me. I've got to know you can handle what I'm going to tell you."

Tony Stark is trusting him with what sounded like Avengers level information. How the hell did that happen? "I can handle it, especially if it involves Brittany."

"After New York and aliens and cosmic power sources that could destroy the world, the powers that be will stop at nothing to keep it from happening again…including exploiting an emotionally fragile 18 year-old genius."

"The government would go after Brittany?"

"They've been pulling the best minds out of universities around the globe. That's how I got involved. The Administration at MIT does want Brittany to do more testing but they know what she, both of you have gone through the past few months. I've been asked to keep her safe until the testing is over. Then, if she's who we all think she is, we'll sit down with the smartest person I know and figure out a plan for both of you. Everyone is acutely aware the two of you are a package deal."

"And I'm supposed to trust you because…?"

"I'm Iron Man"

"Still no light saber"

"Fine, I'll make you a light saber someday. Does that make you happy?"

"It will someday."

This was all so surreal. Tony Stark? Brittany a mathematical genius? MIT? But maybe a change of scenery would be good for both of them

"I'll talk to Britt, but I want something in return"

November 8, 2013

This was the day since Dave told him what was in the envelope and Tony agreed to his conditions for getting Brittany to take the tests at MIT.

But he wasn't ready

The weather was perfect...no rain, crisp (but not too cold) wind blowing, no one close to hear what he would say.

But he wasn't ready

He had the envelope in his hands. His name, in Sebastian's writing, was beginning to fade from all the times he ran his fingers across it. The right corner was torn from the day he hit rock bottom and decided he couldn't wait until today.

2-years since the day he met Sebastian
1-year from the day he lost him

He did wait

But he wasn't ready

The envelope went back in his bag, destined to return to the safe until the next November 8th. He'd just have to convince Tony to let him use his jet to come back to Paris.

"I love you, Sebastian Smythe. I'm so sorry it took me this long to tell you."


Notes:

Back to December: Swift, Taylor 2010

In case you didn't guess, Dalton burning down is the stupid plot device.