AN: huge thanks for the reviews! Somewhat controversial (smutty) chapter... curious to read what you think. Unsure whether this requires a content warning even... *if any degree of angry sex is not your thing thread carefully*.

Also it seems I'm not seeing your reviews again. Must be that time of the year again when they have some server issues.. You can always pm me.. I miss your feedback.

Chapter 18

"So what happened? You were all excited going to this thing with that charming fellow of yours," Isabella said, as she and Gigi emerged from the Forum Melbourne, still high on the concert buzz. The music, no longer live, thumped around them still, the doors to the place being fully open as the crowd made their exit. They'd been a little late getting there, having taken a wrong bus and ended up running about a 2 kilometers to make it. Thankfully, neither was wearing heels.

They both looked casual, but still hot - but not as hot as Gigi had been supposed to look, having reluctantly left the silky blue dress in her closet waiting for a better occasion.

"He was busy," Gigi replied, having during the past half a week toned down significantly on how much she talked about him. She'd also tried her hardest to tone down how much she thought about him. But the latter was more difficult to achieve, since he'd become such a central part of her life here in Melbourne.

She only really had work to thank for not having already done something about it. She kept fluctuating between wanting to lash out - mostly at herself that she'd let him get under her skin this soon. She had to fight herself to not just text him, go over again, play some music out on the balcony and hope for a more positive result. But she didn't want to be that clingy girl who couldn't take a hint either. She was angry at Finn too for being like that - for shutting her off, when she could clearly tell he'd been upset about something. Maybe even upset at her - for showing up like that even? She had been the one to do that the last three times so maybe there was a limit there to how many times was cute and how many times was creepy? She knew Finn got quiet when it came to concerning certain subjects - but she'd learnt how to navigate that minefield pretty well as had he with her. Or so she'd thought. Mostly it was just self blame though - she was this inexperienced 23-year-old proving just what Finn had probably feared all along. That she couldn't separate fun from wanting something more - commitment, labels, co-habitation, a fancy engagement ring and the patter of little feet. She was better than having someone lable her like that without really getting her - that was what she kept telling herself at least.

"Uh-uh, I smell trouble… trouble in paradise," Isabella quipped, being a little intoxicated already. "What do you need? To get drunk? Get laid?" she suggested, reading the real answer from her face.

"There was no paradise. We weren't anything serious… we were nothing," Gigi said, trying to not show her dissapointment. "And no, not drunk, laid… I don't know," Gigi added, squinting her nose. Technically they still had an agreement with Finn, they weren't seeing anyone else, but she did wonder maybe his mood the other night, that had been followed by nearly a week of complete radio silence, the kind that they hadn't had since they'd first realized what they wanted, had been just that - breaking that agreement and she was just holding onto false hope. As self-preservation went - just deciding to do whatever she felt like it, almost felt like the safer choice.

"Well then we'll just find the nearest decent bar do half of that..," Isabella suggested, her brown curls bouncing jollily.

"Half of what?" Gigi replied, feeling confused but nevertheless entertained by her friend.

"We have a drink and look at some guys and we'll see what happens," Isabella suggested and linked their arms and made an entertaining Johnny-Walker-like march towards the bar around the corner, she knew was close to the dorms of the Technical university campuses, hence generally having a nice pick of smart guys.

"They settle down alright?" Sylvie asked as Finn returned to the dinner table.

"Yeah. God, Charlotte is getting so big," Finn exclaimed, having just been in the other side of the house to put Sylvie's kids to bed upon their request. He was the fun uncle, after all.

"She didn't make you do the piggy-back, did she?" Rufus, Sylvie's husband, asked, rolling his eyes. Kids were excellent manipulators in getting what they wanted.

"Ah, nothing I can't handle," Finn replied.

"Some more wine?" Sylvie suggested, seeing that also Bailey return from freshening up.

While Finn had been very clear about the fact that this wasn't a double date as such, he wasn't entirely sure Bailey had gotten the message even if she hadn't been hitting on him directly. She was a real girl-next-door type whom they'd both known for nearly twenty years but had been out of touch with after she'd moved to Perth to her husband a decade ago. She was a brunette and on the shorter side, but pretty, her slightly curvier figure only adding to her character. But Finn really wasn't after romance tonight. What he felt was like he was just numb.

"Yes, please," Bailey replied, eagerly.

"Got to enjoy a night off, eh?" Sylvie encouraged, knowing Bailey hadn't been on her own like this since her husband had passed several months ago, and topped off her glass.

"Finn?" his sister asked.

"I've got enough," Finn replied, somewhat uncharacteristically.

"Do you mind if I just snap a picture of us? God, I feel like I've lived in a cave for the past three years," Bailey suggested, already starting to position the four of them into a group selfie, not really looking for an answer.

Finn put up a good face, feeling indeed some sympathy for the woman. Losing a spouse was never easy, perhaps it was even worse if it had happened for reasons beyond one's control.

The evening hadn't been horrible - and Finn did have the incredible ability of appearing light and energetic when it was needed from him - entertaining even, and he could just see how his sister had been happy to have some meaningful conversations with her husband again now that they were handed some topics besides work, home and children. He was willing to do a lot for Sylvie if she asked.

"And Finn, I don't think I asked, any significant women in your life right now?" Bailey asked, clearly having some underlying thoughts along with that. She wasn't being pushy, but was asking it rather as one might as small-talk. Supposedly that was what Finn was supposed to feel glad about.

"Kind of," Finn said then, for the first time during that week, having been so wrapped up in his brain and his work project, that he hadn't really allowed himself to guilt over distancing himself from Gigi. But as he'd considered his response - a 'no' hadn't felt right either. That only lead to thinking that if Gigi was indeed significant - perhaps he did owe her something more than he had given her?

He could just see Sylvie and Rufus exchange glances.

"Oh, you know how he is…," Sylvie commented lightly, and Finn could just tell how she had that undertone which insinuated how his relationship, whatever it was, wasn't that serious. She was right, but he didn't particularly appreciate being stamped with that label, even to his own surprise. The statement felt especially sharp in the light of his ex-wife remarrying - like it had somehow been his fault, that he couldn be serious if he wanted to a lot of what had gone on in that marriage having remained in the shadows even from Sylvie.

"Yeah, that's just the kind of mess I am," Finn said, and reached for the bottle, his tone being a little sarcastic, perhaps even a little depressed, which again brought on another kind of glance from Sylvie. But Finn was too exhausted to analyze what it was, however, and settled for another large glass of wine.

"Oh that one is just your type," Gigi said, excitedly seeing a slightly outdoorsy type of guy, wearing a flannel shirt and his auburnish beards completing his hipster look, walk past them.

They hadn't settled just for one drink, naturally - the plan to do only half of the idea of getting drunk had not quite turned out that way - one cheap beer having turned into another, Gigi embracing the student lifestyle now that she was out with her friends from less wealthy backgrounds more and more frequently. She was learnign how to live differently, only really allowing herself to indulge in her former ways - the fancy restaurants, the designer outfits etc - with Finn. But maybe that was just another hint towards that relationship, if it could be called that, being something that was stopping her from really living differently.

"I don't think he'd have eyes for someone like me… Look and he's even going at it," Isabella said, the two of them speaking through laughter, seeing the guy slip his hand into the back pocket of a male acquaintance of his and kiss him in greeting.

"Ups," Gigi laughed, having not realized.

"Uh… but he's cute," Isabella said, seeing another tall guy who held some resemblance to Marlon Wayans approach.

"Not bad, not bad at all..," Gigi commented. Naturally what they were doing was not the nicest thing in the world - they were objectifying men and not even speaking that quietly. But, hey, men did it all the time. And right there in a pub with almost 70% men, and this was not a gay bar, the men didn't seem to mind terribly.

To their surprise the guy came to a halt in front of them.

"Can I offer you ladies another drink?" the guy offered, causing the two to giggle some more.

"I don't know, can you?" Isabella teased, and burst into laughter.

"Another round of beer maybe?" Gigi suggested more politely. She liked that the place served beer mostly from bottles which they opened right at the table, making her a little more relaxed.

"Coming right up!" the man said, and let the waiter know they wanted to order.

"So what's your name?" Isabella inquired, clearly being a tad more infatuated with this bloke than Gigi at this minute, which led Gigi's mind to drift and she glanced down on the phone.

She browsed through some fun family weekend photos from her sister - how they'd been to the Central Park Zoo with the kids, cute little Emma looking adorable with the giant ice cream cone.

As Isabella continued to flirt, and they got their beers, Gigi simply continued to browse, eventually after numerous pictures of her former college friends and even some locals she by now knew both from the university and work, she saw the picture Finn to which he had been tagged in moments ago.

She recognized Finn's sister naturally, but the woman in the picture, Bailey by name as she discovered from her username, came as a bit of a surprise to her. Her comment didn't help much either. "Finally out amongst beautiful people again. Sylvie made an amazing meal - yum. Rufus is a lucky man and Finn is charming as ever. Excellent company! I can just feel life pouring back into me," Gigi read out and she could certainly relate. It wasn't anything too discriminating, but it was her drunken mind that was reading a lot more into all of it - even the way Bailey appeared to be leaning into Finn and how his hand went around her, leaning on the back of her chair - gave her more reason to grow angrier by the second.

That was what Finn had done to her too - when she'd felt down he'd been there to help her lift her mood in the beginning. But now she was just ready to exit, not wanting to be the clingy neighbour, not wanting to let this get any worse when she truly felt that it'd probably never work as something more. Damn it, Gigi! - She scolded herself again from thinking about him.

She barely took a small zip of her beer, and brought the bottle along and her eyes scanned the room for cute guys, now with a lot more intent, and made a beeline to one she considered hot and currently idle. He looked almost an easy prey.

It would've been a lot more awkward had she succeeded in picking someone up, but the guys Gigi had liked initially hadn't turned out that nice, some had even turned her down, her pickiness having not gone anywhere despite her drunken state, as she staggered out of the Uber perhaps 30 seconds earlier than Finn's Uber pulled up in front of their apartment building an hours later, not wanting to remain hanging out at the bar as the third wheel either.

Gigi cursed under her breath at the sight of him. Why did they always have such matching timing, why couldn't the universe just work differently sometimes!

"Hey, you need any help there?" Finn offered, generously, seeing her look through her purse for her keys. Despite having spent the past few hours feeling sorry for himself, in the drive back he had indeed realized that he deserved to go either tonight or tomorrow and talk to Gigi. She wasn't insignificant in his eyes, but he too was terrified of this possibly being something... he couldn't even suggest what that something was, and he'd already made a mental note to schedule an appointment with his therapist, realizing he was just a mess right now.

"I'm fine!" Gigi objected. The fact that she was angry wasn't as obvious, as mostly she just looked drunk, not so drunk she wouldn't know where she was or whom she was with, but enough that it showed in her step.

"I gather the concert was fun," Finn replied, almost as if nothing was amiss.

"What do you care!" Gigi huffed at him, catching him by surprise.

"Just asking...," Finn said calmly, and opened the building door for her with his key card, seeing that the concierge must've popped to the back for his break.

"Well whatever!" Gigi mumbled, self protection mechanisms kicking in, and she crossed her arms in front of her.

"I'm sorry I wasn't around this week… I had a rough week," Finn said, trying to think what this must've been about, but remained clueless of how much turning her down that one time had actually hurt her.

"Well you seemed to be enjoying your family-appointed dinner date tonight," Gigi said, as they stepped into the elevator. She'd also felt that surely why things like that were thrown was because Finn hadn't told about her to anyone. Like she was this shameful little secret.

"My date?" Finn frowned, finally realizing how she must've known. "It was just dinner at my sister's," Finn explained, not liking the sound of these accusations.

"Yeah, whatever.., you can date whoever you want! I don't care," Gigi mumbled, impatiently, waiting for the elevator to reach her floor.

"What?!" Finn exclaimed, cluelessly, needing to correct his volume as they reached her floor. Instead of just letting her walk out of there, however, he followed her.

"I, on the other hand, spent the last couple of hours chatting up guys. There were some really nice ones too...," Gigi said, sounding like she was boasting. "Couldn't find someone to hook up with though, but big surprise - nobody wants me!" She pretended to cheer, fluctuating between keeping her voice down and a little louder than would've been polite in the hallway.

Finn looked more confused than ever. What had happened in the meanwhile that he didnt know about?

Gigi unlocked her door but as the door fell open she remained lingering on her doorway as if there was something to say.

"Now shoo! Just go! I don't want your pity or whatever," Gigi said, rather rudely.

"Gi.. come on," Finn urged. But as something in her face turned cold then Finn was afraid she would just tell him to go, tell him even more clearly that they were done without even giving him a good reason. He knew they needed to talk but in that moment all he wanted and knew to do was try to dissolve her bad mood. Tell her in any way but without word because she wouldn't listen how much he wanted her.

His lips landed onto hers bruisingly, pushing her against the doorframe, his hands going around her hips demandingly.

Gigi was essentially just allowing this to happen - after all that was what her entire body had wanted through the evening - she'd wanted someone to want her. But she wasn't making it terribly easy for him either. Their kisses grew erratic, avoidant at times, fierce even like instead of kissing him back softly she rather tugged his lip, deciding to stay pouty and angry. The word 'no' wasn't leaving her lips, but internally it was a close battle with what she really wanted.

"Whatever it is… you found someone to hook up with, alright?" Finn hissed, almost thinking it was the excitement of it that she'd been talking about. He too was mad at her for even having been out searching for a hook up - that was not what they'd agreed on. And he was feeling strangely possessive in that moment, his own intoxication scattering his thoughts as well.

He moved her away from the doorframe, his hand inside her hair, moving her mostly by her head like that, and slammed the door shut behind them with a loud bang which must've at least woken some neighbours. Gigi let her jacket fall to the floor. His hold on her body was strong, possibly bruising - and reactions weren't a lot better - almost meaning to punish him.

Despite all that built up angers, the kisses were intoxicating and Gigi could just feel being pulled right into his grasp again. She hated herself for that so much that for a moment she broke the kiss, stared at him more furously than she ever had and - bam! - slapped him.

"Fucking hell!" Finn cursed.

Gigi was drunk, and severely conflicted inside on what she wanted - she almost just wanted an outer body experience - her body wanting his touch, but her mind was wanting to be as far away as possible, not to allow herself to succumb to him.

He shook his head, and raised his eyebrows, wordlessly asking her to tell him 'no' if that was what she wanted.

She looked embarrassed, apologetic even - but that anger hadn't gone anywhere. But in that moment she just turned herself around, leaning her forearms against the counter. This was as away as she could go physically, feeling unable to tell him 'no'.

Finn wanted to curse, hiss and scold her - her behavior really was like that of a feisty teenager right now. But the way she just unzipped her jeans, unceremoniously, pushing them down on her legs - that was just hot and messed up all at the same time.

Finn pressed her slim body against him, pressing onto her abdomen and already slipping down between her legs from the front and no part of her was fighting how good that felt. She was well turned on already.

Finn continued to caress her breast through her clothing, eventually just slipping under her top carelessly. He almost felt like ripping clothing right then.

"So this is what you wanted tonight? Someone to just fuck you?!" Finn groaned scoldingly. He'd been very close to adding something he might have regretted but he was a pretty sober drunk after all the drinking experience he had.

"Yes! God!" Gigi huffed like a stuck up teenager, the latter sounding like she was rolling her eyes with it.

"Fuck," Finn hissed realizing he was missing protection, having not planned on getting hot and heavy that evening. Hell, he was even still wearing his coat.

"You use that condom of yours already tonight?" Gigi chided, pushing him, already sensing what was delaying this.

"What if I did!?" Finn groaned. "You said you didn't care, right?" he ranted.

"Just do it. I don't care," Gigi insisted, desperately trying to erase whatever else she was feeling. Finn knew she was on the pill, the topic having come up another time when they'd been unsure the condom hadn't broken mid or post-coitus.

Finn replied with a deep and powerful thrust, his pants barely at his thighs that were constraining his movements but not enough. It was just what Gigi had wanted - to feel overwhelmed by how good he felt, to be at his mercy.

His hands were firmly holding on to on to the side of the counter, pressing her tightly between himself and the counter. She didn't even care she was probably going to have bruised hip bones after this.

Her cries of frustration morphed into low moans of pleasure, while his angry grunts were the ones filling the room. He drove harder and harder into her driving her towards an almost involuntary orgasm. It couldn't have lasted more than five minutes - but to Finn the most satisfying mental image of those five minutes was the way he pushed her into yet another orgasm just as he came and filled her, leaving her panting there as a sloppy, almost a slutty mess.

It was what she'd been after, wasn't it?

Finn almost felt like he'd been the victim before this - her going crazy, going out on the town by herself while he'd just had a hard week and been over at dinner with his sister and some friends. He'd been the one who'd been aiming to come around and talk to her and apologize for the week of silence either tonight or tomorrow. But now he was just mad at her and it showed in the lack of affection he showed her after they were done.

He took a deep breath, lingering a few seconds while he caught his breath.

"Just go, okay?" Gigi demanded, no longer able to hold back her tears.

"G…," Finn began, now becoming genuinely concerned about her, having managed to put his pants back on. Maybe he'd been out of line altogether?

"Just get out of here, for fucks sake!" Gigi said, nearly tripping as she turned around and wanted to take a long step but her tight jeans around her knees were stopping her. She looked like a mess, her mascara running down her cheeks.

Finn obeyed but didn't leave lightly.

Was he supposed to apologize for this? She had enjoyed this, hadn't she? Had he really misread her that badly? Why was she so upset? There were a dozen questions flying around his brain, and it took two more large scotches to fully doze off that evening. Maybe she was just as messed up as he was?