Sienna Asher, 18, Victor of the 85th Hunger Games

June 22nd, 88 ADD

On the third anniversary of the day she awoke from her Games- as well as her eighteenth birthday- Sienna Asher watched Panem celebrate a Victor with more blood on his hands, more lies on his lips, and more misdeeds to his name than she'd ever had, and she didn't understand what had gone so horribly wrong. It wasn't as though she was innocent, either. If Sienna was innocent, she'd be dead. But to have tried so hard to do the right things and be punished for it, while another did the wrong things and was praised for it… it hurt.

(Why did living have to be such a difficult choice? Why did so many people delight in the misery of the life she'd won? Why couldn't she make Cal's sacrifice mean something?)

What was everyone else seeing that made her the villain, when they were willing to excuse so much worse?

Maybe it was time she found out.

Alone on the twelfth floor, Sienna made her way to the living room. She settled on the couch and turned on the TV. It didn't take her long to find her Games, although it wasn't nearly as promoted as Diana's or the newest Victor's… or Dimitri's, or Acadia's, or Senna's, or Kellin's…

She squeezed her eyes shut.

(Did she really want to do this? She'd tried so hard to put her Games behind her, and here she was, about to revisit her worst memories.

But she couldn't keep wondering.)

She opened her eyes, and hit play.

At first, everything was just as she remembered it.

Everything from pre-Games was untouched, as was the Bloodbath. She bit her lip as she watched Salome plead for her life, as Cal hesitated only to plunge his harpe through her chest, as Sienna's own screams rang through the background while Ianto dragged her away. They made it to the lakeside cabins, where they tended to Jess's wound and Levi consoled her. Tears burned in her eyes as she watched the Eight girl comfort her younger self, the mantra she'd repeated to herself for years (hold on to the happy memories) spoken aloud once more. From what she could tell, everything on Cal's end was the same as well: the Careers bickered while he brooded. The conversations seemed normal- they planned to hunt down tributes, and then argued over tying knots.

The second day was still normal. Her own alliance argued- she'd forgotten how much Ianto and Jess had gone at it- while Cal sabotaged his own kills and then left the Careers. The conversation was short.

("I'm leaving."

"You're what?"

"You heard me. I'm leaving."

"What? Are you serious?"

"I'm sorry we don't agree."

"You're more of a dingus than I thought. Get out. I'll see you in the final two."

"Sadie-"

"Leave!")

Very short.

She paused the footage for a moment, thinking. It had been a few years, but she'd always envisioned the moment where Cal left the Careers as more… explosive, based on how he'd described his district partner. They'd been close, once- it was obvious in the pre-Games footage- and surely that kind of breakup would warrant more of a conversation, right?

But she hadn't been there. She wouldn't know.

She hit play again, and kept working through the Games. She watched as she nearly ran into Cal at the lake- much less scary now, knowing he had no interest in killing her, but it was scary at the time. Nothing out of the ordinary went down until the sixth day, which she remembered well. The Careers found her and Jess at the lake, and Jess sacrificed herself, because she couldn't run. It was a moment Sienna had kicked herself over for years. Jess punched the One girl in the face before One slit her throat, and Sienna winced as Jess dropped. But then the camera switched back to fourteen-year-old Sienna hiding in Cal's cabin as he threatened the Careers. Afterwards, he asked if she would ally with him, and she agreed.

("We have to get out of here. I don't want the Careers knowing where we are."

"We?"

"If you'll come with me, yeah, we."

Fourteen-year-old Sienna frowned. "I don't know. You killed my friend."

"I'm so, so sorry."

"What about my allies?"

"Hopefully, they're long gone and alive."

"But we lost Jess." Sienna's cheeks flushed red as she tried to hold back tears.

"I'm sorry. I really am."

"I don't know if I trust you."

"It's okay. Here, take this. I won't fight back."

Cal handed her a knife, which she considered for a long moment. Finally, she tucked it in her pocket and stuck out her hand.

"I'm Sienna."

"Caligula.")

She frowned. It was too short. She wasn't sure exactly what was missing, but she knew they had talked longer than that… she'd asked him more questions, hadn't she? He hadn't won her trust that easily. Everything they'd shown was too vague. None of it would have convinced her to stick with Salome's killer. If the Capitol was determined to show her as a master manipulator, why would such a master be so convinced by so little? It seemed off. Why not leave the rest of the conversation in…?

What would the Capitol want to leave out?

She sped through the rest of the sixth day, knowing their first actual breakthrough didn't come until the seventh day. If she remembered correctly, that was around when she'd interrogated him…

("What's your last name?" Sienna asked, breaking a long silence.

Cal looked up. "What?"

"What's your last name," she repeated. "I don't know it."

He hesitated. "Van Zandt. Why?"

"Because I don't know you, and therefore don't know if I can trust you. So I need to know more about you first."

"I thought we already agreed to be allies."

"We did. But you don't get my trust that easily."

"That's fair," he said. "I deserve that. What else do you want to know?"

Sienna thought for a moment. "Everything."

"Everything?"

"That's what I said."

"Uh, well, I'm from District Two. I'm eighteen. I have two parents and a younger sister. Now I'm here."

"That's it? Why aren't you with the other Careers?"

"We had a disagreement."

"And no one else agreed with you? Not even your district partner?"

"Especially not my district partner. God help me if I ever see her again. She's saving me for last. She told me so herself."

"She sounds intense."

Cal grinned. "An understatement, but yes. She is.")

No, no, no… this was wrong. This was definitely wrong… they'd said more, the conversation was too choppy… she remembered talking about Salome- where was that part? They'd spoken of her multiple times, because Cal had killed her in front of Sienna, and it had taken days to work through that… but the Capitol didn't want the rest of Panem seeing that.

Of course.

They wouldn't air the parts where Cal talked about his regrets, about the problems with Careers, about his need to set things right. They wouldn't let a moment of rebelliousness- because that truly was the road Cal had started to go down- make it to the audience. That made sense.

But how had it all rebounded on her?

She skipped past another scene of Levi and Ianto until the camera switched back to her and Cal.

(Cal handed her a piece of bread. "You know, I don't actually know that much about Twelve," he said. "What's it like?"

"I spend most of my time in my parent's antique shop."

"Antique shop?"

Sienna's eyes gleamed. "Oh, yeah.")

No- wait- it was too short, there was more- he'd finally convinced her he was sincere that day, and she'd finally taken bread from him- she remembered this part, because- because he'd said he would die, she couldn't forget that…

And as she continued watching, she started to notice more.

The camera lingered on Cal every time her younger self talked. Every time he smiled or smirked or laughed at something she said, the camera was on him. The smallest amounts of affection were amplified by the camera's attention.

For Sienna, however, the footage only showed the moments where her smile faded, or when she studied Cal closely, or when they started strategizing.

From these two very different angles, a narrative began to appear.

They didn't show any more of her breakdowns over her lost allies. They didn't show their game of Truth or Dare, or their long conversations, or any of her moments of decency. Instead, the footage focused on their deal to make it to the end together, on Sienna leaving Jess behind, on her killing the Four boy without remorse. That part, they showed in full.

That part, and one other.

(Levi drove the knife into Sienna's shoulder. Sienna turned around, stumbling back, but Levi kept coming toward her.

"Please," Sienna gasped. "We're friends, we're the Dream Team, right?"

"I know," Levi said quietly. "And I really am sorry, okay?"

Sienna was crying. She stumbled into a tree, still trying to back away, her breathing ragged. "What would Ianto say? Or Jess? Or Salome?"

Levi pressed her lips into a thin line. "They're gone, Sienna. We have to make the best choices for ourselves now."

"Levi, please," Sienna sobbed. "I don't want to die." She wiped some of the tears away, but more replaced them in an instant. Her voice cracked as she said, "I just want to go home."

Levi hesitated. "I-"

But Sienna never let her finish. She plunged Cal's knife into Levi's chest. Levi crumpled as Sienna backpedaled, staring wide-eyed at what she'd done.

Then, she ran off towards Cal.)

But- but the rest was gone- she'd held Levi, she'd been sorry, she still was- Levi had told her to go win, and she had, but she'd stayed with her... she hadn't just left her there to die alone.

Sienna had always been incredibly aware of her mistakes, but that was what she'd seen her Games as- mistakes. Here, though, in this version of events, it didn't look like she was making mistakes.

She looked like she knew exactly what she was doing.

They'd shown her falling to pieces once she lost Salome, and when Cal entered the picture it- it looked as though she hadn't reconciled with him, but tricked him into meeting Salome's fate. It looked as though once Levi had made her move, Sienna had decided the same.

Sienna was crying by this point, but she refused to let herself stop watching. She had to see what Diana had seen. She needed to see this through to the end. Cal and Sadie fought, their conversation clearly doctored, and then Sienna ran up to attack from behind- another move that, in hindsight, did not help her case- but Sadie caught her, and the camera lingered on that victory. Sadie's patriotism, which Sienna had forgotten in the years since, was consistent in this moment as a small fanfare from the anthem played behind her.

But then Cal killed Sadie and ran to Sienna's side.

("No, no no no no no. Don't give up on me. Sienna, listen to me. It's time."

"No, I can't…" she said weakly, curling in on herself. There was so much blood.

"You have to. And if you won't…"

"Wait." She reached a trembling hand toward Cal's knife.

"Thank you," Cal said. "For letting me do this."

A close-up shot of her small hand around the knife handle.

"Three. Two. One."

Cal crumpled to the ground, the weapon buried in his chest. His cannon fired. Sienna collapsed alongside him, moments from her own death.

The camera lingered on Cal's peaceful face.

Then the hovercraft lifted Sienna out of the arena, and the footage ended.)

"No!" she cried. "I didn't… I didn't mean… no, no…"

They'd taken her Games, and rewritten them to make her the villain, the manipulator… her little-girl businesswoman schtick had only pushed their narrative further. By taking out all of Cal's regrets- his humanity- they'd reduced him to Sienna's loyal bodyguard, and one who was wrapped tightly around her finger at that. With Sadie as such a strong patriot, they would never try to make her the bad guy in their story, and Levi- who she'd loved, who had betrayed her first- was a Victor's daughter, they'd never try that angle with her. But with Sienna, it had worked too well. They'd needed a villain for their story, for their entertainment, and with Cal's remorse deleted from the narrative, she had been the obvious choice. The Capitol had wanted Sadie or Levi to win, she was sure of it. Otherwise they wouldn't have painted her this way, but she was the Victor they'd gotten.

The Victor no one had wanted.

Not the Capitol, not Twelve, not Aurelia, not Two or Eight or Four.

The only person who had never doubted her was Cal, and he was long gone.

She squeezed her eyes shut, still sobbing, reaching for the memories- the Capitol had tried to erase them, but she would remember him. The real him. He was gone, but she wouldn't let go of him.

(He sighed, his shallow blue eyes solemn. "After the Bloodbath, I started to see things more clearly. I just couldn't do it anymore."

"Do what?"

"Kill.")

("Sienna, I wouldn't want to help you if I didn't think you were worth it."

"But am I?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because you're brave and selfless and intelligent, and you never deserved to be here. I chose this, and you didn't.")

("I know you can win this. And if you'll have me, I'd love to help you," he said, as sincere as could be.

"But that means you would die."

"I know. If that's what it takes to set this right… then so be it.")

("Let's do a dare. But you can't pick anything that'll get us killed. Or seriously maimed," he said.

"Well, yes. I already have an idea," Sienna said, rubbing her hands together.

"I'm going to regret this, aren't I."

"Yes. Show me one of your dance routines."

"What?!"

"You said you used to dance before you trained. I want to see it!"

"I only did it for balance and flexibility purposes. It was very serious business. I didn't put on shows," he grumbled.

"It's a dare. You have to do it."

"I'll get you back for this.")

("That's the problem, isn't it? Everyone deserves to win, and no one deserves to die," Cal said.

"I don't like it. You Volunteer people are crazy."

"Yeah. We are.")

("We have to take a last stand anyway. We might as well do it on our own terms, right?"

"I know. I'm just not looking forward to this," Sienna said, twisting her fingers anxiously.

"Well, look forward to other things. Going home, seeing your family and friends again…"

"I'm too nervous to look forward to that."

"Well, you should look forward to it anyway. Because I'm going to make sure it happens."

"I don't want you to die. It seems cruel to look forward to living when you're planning your death."

"It's okay. It's what I want," he murmured.

"But-"

"My whole life has been a lie, Sienna. It's been a big, disgusting lie. But if it ends the way I want it to, it'll have been worth it. I need this to mean something."

"I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for.")

("Thank you. For letting me do this," he said.

"You've given me… no other… choice. I'll miss you… and… I'm so… sorry…"

"Don't be. Ready?"

"Never.")

She would not forget the real Cal. The Gamemakers couldn't get rid of him that easily. He was more than that footage showed, and so was she. Sienna was the only one left to care about that. He wasn't just another tribute, or even just another Career, he was Cal. He had given up everything to fix his mistakes. And that meant she was sitting here, no longer fourteen but eighteen, how old he'd been when she'd lost him, and that had to mean something, right?

Sienna was still here because of him. She was Cal's legacy.

By that virtue alone, she couldn't be the Victor they wanted. She would always be a reminder of his rebellion. Her existence was proof to the Capitol that they didn't get what they wanted.

With that thought, and with memories she'd been suppressing fresh in her mind, Sienna realized she'd never agreed with Cal's ideas more than she did right now.

She did two things.

First, she wrote a letter, because she was not the cruel, unfeeling Victor they wanted her to be: she cared about people, and she knew he probably needed someone right now. Besides, she was tired of being lonely.

Then, she packed her bags for Twelve, because she was Cal's legacy, and she had work to do.

Sienna Asher was back in business.

hi friends hope you enjoyed epi #2... spent a lot of time revisiting ett and this was a fun trip down memory lane. i miss those kids.

in other news- we're about one month out from the first round of closings now! that is to say... there's still plenty of time to sub to rb3! i've received some fantastic subs so far and wow i'm hyped. this will be fun!

anyway hope everyone is having a good day and i'll see you next time!

rb