*A character I saw in movie called Baptists at Our Barbecue.

I do own the copyrights to So Weird.

Lights Turn On and More Order

Scene 5

Putting Things in Order

There was no sound in the tavern as Fi and Charly walked downstairs. No one was eating, not any customers, no band members, and definitely not Molly. It was too strange, even for Fi who had seen many things.

"I didn't think I sang that bad last night." Carly spoke dryly with no particular emotion.

"You didn't; fact is, you did better than my mother." She waved her hand and shook her head when Charly asked if there was a chance Molly had taken offense. "No, she's been saying you have more skill than she does for years. She's always been meaning to ask you on stage, but something's always come up. Jack simply pushed it to the front last night."

"Then where did everyone go?"

"They're down the street, big white building. A dance was supposed to be held." A man's voice, along with a young man's, got them to turn around.

Charly did not recognize the gentleman but thought he could pass for *Frank Hatch, and the boy she knew to be a slave. "Supposed to?" There was something in his eyes and tone of voice that shouted something was wrong; even Fi heard it.

"Strange things have been going on. I don't know if the dance is still being held."

"Let's go check things out." Fi did not have to ask twice.

"Okay, but first..." Charly asked what a young slave boy from the south was doing in an English setting and what on earth is a western gentleman doing in a British Tavern?' Like Ebenezer, they smiled, like the rest they vanished.

Any talk at the tavern, or the results, were not even considered as Fi and Charly stepped into a room that was indeed big enough to hold a dance. Instantly, it was if Charly was pushing aside fog and watching herself dancing with a white-haired gentleman. However, before she could focus on what she was seeing Molly walked up to her.

"Charly?" Molly walked over to her friend, "Are you all right?"

"I think so." She looked around and asked why there was no dancing going on. "Fi and I were told there was supposed to be a dance here."

"There was, but no one has shown up." Molly pointed to her son, "So, we've been listening to Jack telling us the classics; you know, like Mark Twain, Austen and such." Her answer confused Carly and Fi, there were plenty of gentlemen and ladies in the room. However, Carly's mind shot to what Molly had just said, not what was around her.

"By chance, were you telling someone about the Legend of Sleepy Hollow? Robin Hood and so forth?"' Knowing his habits, along with the fact Jack had not been on the bus with them got Charly to sit down and think over the past few days; not to mention -this time- no one was seeing what she was, other maybe Fi, hence her question to Jack.

"Ya, so what?

Fi easily caught on. The others not so much even though they should have. However, Charly ignored that fact and kicked into teacher mode, mother mode, any mode that required a strong hand an immovable spirit.

"Where are you getting your so-called facts? It can't be from the books; you never crack open any classical literature. And..." Charly rolled her eyes. "Master of Disguise doesn't count, even if Devlin Bowman thought otherwise. And even if he was, he would belong in Italy not England." It was then she turned and shot 'you know I'm right' towards a gentleman who did indeed look like Pistachio's opponent.

"I don't think he likes what you just said." Fi whispered low and had to bite back a laugh when Deviin stomped off in a childish fit; however, Jack failed to see it and answered her question.

"Troy, he reads plenty."

She'd have answered only Charly started not feeling well. "We can discuss the rest of your errors once I go get something to settle my stomach." She stood up and managed to get back to the tavern without showing signs of just how ill she felt and was back within fifteen minutes after being given an herbal tea to drink by a woman she'd not met, or even recognized. However, that mattered little to her situation. Therefore, it wasn't long before Charly was back addressing what she figured was the real problem.

"Troy's a twit. I doubt he could find his way out of a wet paper sack." She jerked slightly when Lady Catherine, who was now sitting next to her, spoke up.

"Finally, someone with intelligence." It was, for some reason, only Charly and Fi, who could hear her. However, they kept their mouths closed on the subject.

Jack only kept his shut because his mother was shooting him a 'cork it' type of look. Charlie saw the look, as did Fi. Therefore, the older of the two had no problems continuing on.

"Your friend couldn't get things in order to save his life, I suppose he told you Long-John Silver was a land lubber?" When Jack mumbled yes, Charly shook her head. "Get him off dry land, the man's a pirate. And, for the record Jack Sparrow is too, not to mention his story has not been around long enough to be considered a classic yet." Two gentleman -pirates indeed- stood up, bowed and did not drag led in their departure; though Jack Sparrow's humorous remark about being classic caused both ladies to choke on laughter wanting to come out.

"Anything else?" Jack growled

"Oh, where do I begin?" Charly spoke dryly. "Shut your pie hole Jack..." She spoke in a monotone voice, "... it was a rhetorical question. Before I go on, what kind of description are you giving out on Sherlock Holmes?" When Jack gave it Charly couldn't help but crack up laughing.

"What's so funny?" Jack put his hands on his hips.

"You just described Doctor Watson, not Holmes." Charly managed to pull back and wipe her tears of laughter away as the lady next to her spoke again.

"Like I said, finally, someone with a set of brains." Charly pretended not to hear the Lady Catherine as she had before-mostly because Jack was speaking again.

"Okay, maybe, he got some facts wrong, but he couldn't have gotten them all incorrect." Jack made the mistake of saying Lady's Catherine's name without her title, it got him instantly corrected.

"I don't care who you are, or what you think of her, you don't go referring to her without the proper title. And, you don't have to tell me the rest of what you missed up; I know them all."

"How? You've only been here about ten minutes?" Jack didn't hide a sneer.

"First, it's ROCHESTER, not Worchester. Bertha Mason, not Berta Majors, was his first wife; JANE or JANET was his second; not Janie." Charly wasn't about to tell Jack the people she could see had name tags on. "Second, it is CAPTAIN Wentworth, not Colonel; that was Brandon. And you have their wives swapped around. Anne is with Wentworth and MARIANNE is with the colonel. OH, and..." Carly took a deep breath, "Marrianne's sister is named Elinor not Elnora and she married EDWARD Harris, NOT Robert.' A siren sound going off got everyone outside.