Chapter 8 "Modern Love"
(Song Suggestion: David Bowie, "Modern Love")
Janine
My wedding party and I enjoyed some much-needed rest and relaxation, receiving manicures and pedicures at a Brooklyn salon the afternoon before my wedding to Egon. Furthermore, my lengthy to-do list had been thrown away the night before I went to sleep, and I slept like a baby. I only had to prepare to be Mrs. Egon Spengler, which overwhelmed me with joy and delirium!
"We, the girls of the Janegon wedding party, and I bought you a wedding gift," Doris sneakily announced after we allowed our fingernail polish to dry. I chose a maroon color that matched our wedding ones and the lipstick I would wear tomorrow.
With a sly grin, Lucy handed me a red box with a large white bow she had concealed this whole time.
"A practical one," she innocently suggested with a knowing smile on her pink lips.
"Uh oh," I groaned, feigning shock. Honestly, I felt titillated and intrigued about the random gift. With Doris and Lucy involved, it probably had to do with sex. Dianne and my mother were present, so I hoped it wasn't too naughty or graphic.
"Open it already," Wendy eagerly squealed as the others crowded around to watch me open the gift.
After I removed the bow, I opened the shiny box to reveal a racy set of white bridal lingerie.
"Ohhh myyyy," I nervously crooned as I gingerly felt the lacy white teddy in the box, which was as soft as satin. I imagined how it felt on my bare skin before getting busy with my hunky scientist.
"Practical," I countered with a smirk.
Considering how Egon would absolutely adore this piece of lingerie, my thoughts were focused on the anticipation of him taking it off. My face flushed red hot like a stove, and my pulse increased.
"Sorry, Moms, we have to see it. Cover your eyes if needed," my former roommate insisted as I nodded towards my nieces.
"Oh, oops," Wendy stated when she realized her mistake.
"I'll take the girls to the restroom. Anyone else," Mom rapidly offered, grabbing both of my confused nieces' hands before they knew what was happening.
"But I want to see," my eldest niece protested, looking back as they swiftly walked towards the back of the salon.
"It's for grown-ups," Mother responded, but her voice grew faint as we heard the door close to the bathroom.
"Dianne? Last time to escape before the lewd comments about your youngest son begin," Doris inquired, motioning me to wait.
My soon-to-be mother-in-law dismissed her concerns with a wave of her hand and a large toothless smile. Dianne was cool like that, and I liked that about her.
Ecstatically, I held up the sexy lingerie when Doris signaled it was clear.
Oohs and ahhs filled the area afterward then the comments began.
"I think Egon 'freaking' Spengler will rip it off you when he sees you," Bree coyly remarked.
"Nah, I bet they won't make it fully clothed to the hotel," Lucy suggested, arching an eyebrow.
"Quite possibly," I concurred, bobbing my head up and down in agreement.
"The good doctor will be closely examining you before he conducts his experiment, I'm sure," Maura joked, and I chuckled.
"Your wedding dress will be in shreds," Wendy agreed, laughing.
"Janine's going to be preggers in no time, and I can have more grandkids to spoil," Dianne predicted, winking at me. My nieces' voices became louder as they left the bathroom, so I returned the gift to its box, and Lucy hid it for me.
"This is excellent, ladies. Thank you so much," I gratefully responded, tears filling my eyes.
A few seconds later, I cleared my throat and reminded Dianne that we wanted to wait three years to adjust to married life. Honestly, I was thrilled about the prospect of having children with Egon soon.
"Plans are sometimes meant to be broken, Janine. Michael came a year early while I was trying to finish my doctorate, and at the time, I was not too flexible about my plans. Since then, I have learned to be," Dianne wisely countered, examining her pink nails.
"She's right. We weren't going to have children until Doris appeared," Mother added as she sat next to Dianne. Egon and I were so pleased that our parents got along well together.
"Really? I'm surprised you are a good mother, and it seems so natural to you," I exclaimed, to which she shrugged and thanked me quietly. Standing up, Mom came over to me and kissed my forehead. More happiness.
Egon
The Next Morning…
I felt too electrified to sleep, so Ray, Peter, and I played poker until two in the morning. Since it didn't have to be up until much later, I knew it wouldn't be a problem. I eventually fell asleep and didn't wake up until eleven in the morning.
"Today, Janine will finally be my wife. Lord, I don't pray as often as I should, but please, please make our marriage ceremony go without a hitch," I thought.
My glasses were on the nightstand with several books of the occult that Ray had open, with various pages highlighted and pencils stuck to save them. Although I didn't share his affinity for the subject, it was occasionally fascinating.
"But not for our wedding night," I said, firmly putting the top book back. Unconsciously, I had picked it up and thumbed through it, just like Janine would. When we perused bookstores, we frequently lost hours at a time as we both would pick up books, find a chair, and read them. We teased each other that if we were superheroes, our weaknesses would be books like kryptonite to Superman.
Our wedding was at three in the afternoon, and I rose from my old bed to scrutinize the weather outside around ten. As predicted by the local meteorologist, it was a picturesque fall day. I grinned as I stretched my arms above me and padded to the kitchen to find my former roommates making a late breakfast.
"Eggs for the Egghead," Peter offered as he lifted the egg carton for me to see.
"Good one, Peter," I sarcastically quipped.
"You will need your strength and stamina for the honeymoon," Ray playfully teased, and I blithely gave him a stern look.
"No problem there," I arrogantly scoffed, causing the chubby ghostbuster's face to redden.
Sauntering into the kitchen, I gave them a hand as we made our last breakfast together as the three original single Ghostbusters.
"Regrettably, I have to fast until after the wedding. It is a Jewish tradition we choose to follow, so just coffee for me," I drily elucidated, wrinkling my nose as I loved a big breakfast. However, I had a lifetime of them with Janine on the way, which gave me the strength to resist the delicious smells of breakfast.
Mama Melnitz
Today my baby girl and her long-time boyfriend, Dr. Egon Spengler, would tie the knot, and I didn't sleep much the night before due to my exhilaration. Due to a Jewish tradition, the bride and groom fasted until after the wedding. They then shared a small meal alone before returning to the reception. Janine normally didn't do well without eating breakfast, but I ensured she had a late-night snack before bed.
My youngest, never a morning person, sat at the kitchen table, constantly blinking as she woke up. As I sat next to Janine, I took her right hand to examine her fingernails to ensure nothing was broken, and then her left. Since they were still pristine, I gently released them to the table.
"Coffee," Janine grumbled.
"Here you go, honey, just a half cup," I cheerfully stated, retrieving a cup from the cupboard and pouring her some. Rapidly, I handed it to Janine, who gratefully took it.
"Don't fuss over her," Fritz cautioned from the stove, "allow her to wake up."
"OK, OK," I relented, sitting at the table.
Janine would bathe and dress at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens (BBG) in a couple of hours. A friend of Doris would fix my youngest daughter's hair and make-up.
Since I believed heavily in tradition, I insisted on giving Janine something "borrowed" by giving her Grandmother's pearl necklace to don. I knew her bridesmaids gave her some lingerie, including the garter for her thigh, which was the "new" gift idea. Dianne offered a "blue" present, and Janine's veil was vintage, so that took care of "old."
Merrily, I began humming as Janine grumpily drank her coffee. She gave me a death stare, but I disregarded it as Fritz did the dishes. The leaves were changing into pretty rich Fall colors, making me smile. In my free time, I painted one of our magnificent magnolia trees in the backyard, and it was one of my best paintings.
"I'm going to take a shower, honey," my husband informed me as I dreamily looked out the window at our backyard covered in colorful leaves.
Janine, preoccupied with her coffee, didn't see when Fitz mouthed the words to join me.
"Hmm, sounds fantastic," I admitted, batting my eyelashes at him. My husband bent down and kissed me. Next, he winked at me and headed toward our bedroom.
"Gross, too early," Janine mumbled, "Is there more coffee?"
"Only one more half cup, my lovely," I warned, grabbing her mug so I could refill it, "we don't need you extra jittery."
"Ma," My youngest daughter protested with her nasal intonation.
After retrieving the coffee, I gave her my "Mother Knows Best" stare. Dutifully, Janine halted her complaint before slyly asking,
"How long will you and Dad be in the shower?"
"Just wait, Janine; you and Egon will have to sneak around your children to have an intimate moment together," I drily cautioned, rolling my eyes.
"Hmm, we will see," she said, grinning and reaching for the paper.
"Now, excuse me," I remarked, standing up from the table.
Janine
My first thought when I woke up was, "today, I will be Mrs. Egon Spengler," and my heart was full of love and happiness.
There wasn't much to do before the ceremony, and I felt comforted by that thought. Sighing, I thought everything was finally falling into place. This ceremony and reception would be the ultimate payoff for our arduous and grueling planning and work of our wedding.
I felt excited about our honeymoon to Paris, the City of Love. Before Egon even admitted his attraction to me, I told him I wanted to go to see all of the museums, notably the Louvre. The fact that he remembered made the honeymoon even more special. We were staying at a local upscale Manhattan hotel tonight until our flight left the following day at eight in the morning. Honestly, I didn't expect to get much sleep tonight, but the trip to Paris was seven hours, so we could sleep then.
My mother insisted that we get to the BBG two hours before the wedding to go over everything with the wedding planner one more time to ensure everything was in place. I argued that it would not take me long to dress and that my make-up and hair would be done in an hour. However, it fell on deaf ears.
"Let's check it out," Laura, the wedding planner, enthusiastically suggested when we met her soon afterward.
The enormous desert pavilion was split into two rooms for the ceremony and reception. My eyes watered as I saw the first magnificent area, and my mouth dropped open. I swear my heart skipped a beat when I first entered it. Mother and I exchanged bewildered looks because everything appeared precisely how I wanted it. In fact, my customarily reserved parent squealed like a little girl in glee, and I did the same.
The first thing I saw was the chuppah standing in perfect condition despite the supernatural occurrence two nights ago. Laura's team decorated the canopy with the greenest garland with tiny white flower blossoms hanging from each of the four birch bases. An intricately decorated cotton sheet passed down on my Mom's side covered three-quarters of the top. Red, yellow, and white rose petals were sprinkled on it and garnished on the floor where we would take our vows.
There were five rows of white chairs on the groom's side and five rows of the same on my side. On the Spengler side, there were thin golden ribbon bows on the backs of the chairs for decoration, and on my side, maroon.
"Wow!" I exclaimed.
The second room in the desert pavilion for the reception was an enormous old greenhouse-shaped barn with soft hanging lamps from the ceilings. It was decorated precisely to my specifications- fifteen round tables with dark wooden chairs and rich gold-colored tablecloths were set up in the room. Each had a vase with a mixture of red and white roses and a gold-colored nameplate for each place setting. As I walked around, I felt in awe and again felt
tears come to my eyes, and I attempt to blink them away without wiping them and making my eyes puffy.
The bride and groom's table was a long rectangular one with our engagement photo in a handsome silver frame with red and white roses crossed in front of it. Our chairs had a homemade gift from my nieces, who painted "bride" and "groom" hangers for us to display on the back of them. To my sister's shock, they contained a lot of glitter that managed to get all over their house, and she was not happy about it.
"So magical. You pulled it off without a hitch," I complimented the wedding planner, who appeared apprehensive as we strolled the grounds. Indeed, I was impressed, and so was Mother, who began crying.
I hugged her while thanking Laura with a grateful smile.
"I'm so excited you like it," the wedding planner said, relieved, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand.
Leisurely, we strolled to the bathroom/ready room where I would prepare for my wedding in the fantastic Autumn weather.
"Everything is in place, my dear; now go prepare for your handsome soon-to-be husband. I am sure you are ready," Laura encouraged with a wide smile.
Giggling, I nodded with a shy smile.
"Yes, my Janine is ready to marry her Prince Charming," my mother cheerfully responded.
"Let's go inside and relax until the hairdresser is here," she suggested, opening the door.
After putting on my white strapless bra and thong underwear, I changed into my purple silk robe. Meanwhile, Mom applied Rave hair spray to her reddish-gray hair, ensuring everything was in place. Doris came in twelve minutes later with the hairdresser and make-up artist, Clara, and her two pretty daughters in tow.
"Here comes the bride," Lenora sang as Doris unpacked the large suitcase bag she had brought. It contained the veil, the flower girl baskets, and loads of rose petals bags, along with many other things.
Each niece exuded extraordinarily loveliness in their matching white dresses with large red curls in their hair and excitement on their faces.
"Don't you two look gorgeous," I cooed at them as Clara began rolling my red hair in curlers to give it more volume.
"Yes, duh," Lenora quipped, putting her hand on her hip and flipping her long reddish hair over her shoulder.
"That is exactly like you, Doris," Mom announced as she and I giggled.
"I created a monster," my sister rolled her eyes as she grinned at us. Next, Doris gave Mom my veil to scrutinize.
"Why don't I do your make-up while we wait for your hair to finish," Clara questioned after ensuring the rollers were not too tight on my head. She set a timer for fifteen minutes and suggested I brush my teeth.
Nodding my approval, I felt excited. Clara's watch announced that I only had seventy-five minutes until I was Mrs. Egon Spengler! My heart beat swiftly, and my breathing quickened with each passing minute.
"Girls, come here and sit on the sofa while we prepare Aunt Janine for her wedding," my sister ordered as I followed Clara's instructions.
"Who's in charge of the bouquet," Doris inquired afterward. She donned a gold short-sleeved chiffon bridesmaid dress that went to her knees, a complementary color. Doris was the matron of honor and wore a different dress color than the bridesmaid, which was burgundy. Currently, she was filling the flower girls' baskets with rose petals.
"Wendy," Bree reminded Doris. I took my seat in front of the mirror and reached for the glass of water to drink after brushing my teeth. Clara then masterfully applied my base makeup to my face.
A knock came on the door, and the door flew open, revealing my former roommate in her bridesmaid's dress. That was just how Wendy entered rooms, with a bang. However, this time, she held a bountiful mixture of red, yellow, and white roses bouquet with a thick burgundy ribbon tied into a heart-shaped bow.
"Hey, everyone!"
After greeting my Mom, Wendy handed her the bouquet.
"Thanks, Wendy. You look lovely," she complimented, flashing her smile.
The time went by quickly with our constant chattering and Clara's handiwork of my hair and make-up. My mother suggested I go to the bathroom before I put the dress on like I was two years old. Rolling my eyes at Doris, I did so only because I was anxious to wear my new clothing.
For my wedding dress, I selected an "a line" vintage one from the 1950s that tapered at the waist and then flared out, emphasizing my curvaceous body. The first time I saw that dress, I fell in love with it, and it fits wonderfully after being hemmed. Although there were no sleeves, my chest and arms were modestly covered in loose chiffon. It was knee length and displayed my shapely legs, which Egon adored. After I had donned the dress, I admired myself in the mirror.
"Oh, perfect!" I gleefully squealed, and everyone gave me heartfelt compliments.
Doris placed the missing piece, the strappy white three-and-a-half-inch heels, on the ground as I sat down one more time. As I slipped them in, I felt like Cinderella.
"Wait, Dianne just gave me the 'blue' piece for your dress," Bree announced, rushing into the room.
"Let's see this thing," I puzzledly remarked.
Opening her hand, my bridesmaid revealed a remarkable half-of-an-inch blue bow charm I could clip on my heel strap.
"Her Grandfather was a jeweler, and he made it for her. Dianne told me that I would receive it because she didn't have any female children when I met her. I thought she was joking, of course," I recalled in a mumble, almost breaking into tears.
"Take a deep breath and close your eyes," Doris commanded, and I did so.
Opening my eyes a few seconds later, I felt calm and could appreciate the lovely gift without tears.
"Will you put it on for me, Bree?"
My childhood friend bent down carefully and snapped the charm on the shoe strap around my right ankle.
"Done," she announced, flipping her long dark hair over her left shoulder.
Turning my heel, I saw the blue bow dangle from the white strap and happily giggled.
"It's adorable!" I shrieked as everyone chuckled.
Smiling, I felt so blessed and told everyone around me.
"We have about fifteen minutes," Clara declared, checking her watch and handing me my Chanel Number Five perfume to spray on my neck and wrists. I did so then she applied my lipstick for me as my Mom examined the veil one more time. Once more, I checked my appearance and was pleased as punch.
"Come on, Mom," Doris urged as she fidgeted with it.
The veil was a short one made of chiffon with a rose pattern, and it only covered my face to just past my chin. Clara carefully put it on top of my head among my reddish curls, and everyone gasped simultaneously.
"You look breathtaking, my Janine," Mother sobbed, grabbing a handkerchief.
I felt in a daze as everyone in the room complimented me. I could hardly believe the woman in the mirror was me! Jubilation quickly took over as I felt the blood coarse through my veins, and I hoped that Egon would like how I looked. After ceasing her sobbing, Mother led us in a small prayer before my Dad entered the room. He was amazed by my appearance and said so when he regained his speaking ability.
Egon
We had to be at the BBG one hour early, but there was nothing to do. To ease my anxiety, I paced the room back and forth.
"Relax, Spengs, Brooklyn will say yes," Pete teased as I checked my tie for the hundredth time in the mirror. It wasn't right, just too tight around my Adam's apple. We all laughed, and I reluctantly sat down on a chair next to my friends and family.
"Sorry, we have been waiting for so long. I want everything to be just right," I frustratedly sputtered out, messing with my tie.
"Here, honey, let me," Dianne soothingly suggested, walking towards me.
"We know, Egon. You two are perfectionists," David reminded me, "it has its benefits and its pitfalls."
"Like what?" my Mother abruptly inquired, stopping her work on my tie and giving my Dad a cautionary look.
"Yikes, nothing," David playfully replied, covering his face with his arms.
"Hmm, that's what I thought," Diane grumbled, facing me again. After a moment, she blew a kiss on Dad, suggesting she was joking and that all was well.
"I am getting married soon, and I don't have time to watch you and Dad flirt," I whined. Everyone chuckled at my parents' banter except me.
" Egon Spengler! Don't get impatient with me! I was in labor with you for nine arduous hours," she reminded me, then finished my tie.
"Ouch," Peter quipped from behind.
"Yes, ma'am," I grumbled as my cheeks flushed with embarrassment.
"Now go check it, please," Dianne requested.
Sauntering to the mirror, I saw that my tie was not only on correctly but was no longer choking me.
"Thank you for fixing my tie," I remarked, then bent down to kiss her cheek after walking back to where she stood. My mother smiled brightly at me and nodded. Ten minutes later, she decided to leave and check on the bride.
"Did you write your vows?" Ray asked, tapping my shoulder although he sat next to me.
"No, we have done that... Uhm.. informally," I revealed, feeling flushed. My mind flashed pictures of us in our bed, discussing how much we loved each other, and it wasn't just one time.
"If you don't know that woman loves you by now, dang," Winston happily joked, " it was clear as day when I started, and I thought you two were together already. And you weren't!"
Shaking my head, I admitted that I couldn't believe everything we had gone through.
"That was when you found out that Venkman persuaded J to take a semester off without you knowing. We left before you kicked his ass," Ray admitted, crossing his arms across his chest, and Peter good-naturedly rolled his eyes.
"True. Instead, we stood by the door with our ears on the door, wanting to hear the whooping. Then Janine discovered us, looking all suspicious," Winston revealed with a chuckle.
"But we didn't hear anything," Ray protested.
"That's because Iggy didn't give me one, Raymond," Venkman exasperatedly remarked, "but I knew I was pushing it."
"Yes, you were. Janine was already uncertain about completing her degree, and it doesn't matter because she did," I surmised after a pause.
"We are about to start," Dianne eagerly commented, returning a few minutes later. My heart beat soared at my mother's announcement. Next, Peter handed me a mint from his pocket, and I unwrapped it before popping it into my mouth.
"You got this, big guy," he encouraged.
"Peter, I want to thank you for everything you have done for us. I know you gave a tremendous amount of encouragement and support not only to Janine but myself to get us together," I appreciatively said.
"No problem, Iggy; I knew she was the one for you," he winked.
"Ready?" David asked as I checked my appearance in the mirror one more time.
"Infinitely," I grinned, embracing both parents one at a time to thank them for their assistance with the ceremony.
Delighted, I escorted them outside to the ceremony, smirking. As other members of the wedding party started to come out, I took special pains to remember as much as possible about this monumental day. The sky was cloudless, and a nice breeze was in the air as I smiled at our friends, family, and guests.
Nothing could have prepared me for seeing the level of beauty Janine exhibited in a classy yet vintage white wedding dress. Time stopped for me when I viewed her, and I wept sloppy tears. Quickly I wiped them away, so I didn't miss a magical moment with my phenomenal bride, Janine.
A thin veil covered her face, but the blissfulness shone through regardless like a beacon of light in the night sky in the form of her luminous smile. Meanwhile, Janine participated in the Jewish tradition of circling, where the bride walked around the groom three or seven times to create a new family circle or to ward off evil spirits. She would choose to circle me seven times because her mother and sister did the same number at their weddings. As my lovely fiancée did, her sparkling blue eyes lovingly gazed into my face with a slight smile on her red lips. I felt like I had tunnel vision, and we were the only ones there.
"My God, Janine, you look majestic," I whispered as Janine took her place at the front of the chuppah next to me. Her parents, pleased, stood on the left of her, and David and Dianne happily observed from my right
Turning to me, she flashed a dazzling smile and mouthed, " thank you. So do you."
I also noticed tears in her eyes and grinned at her as the rabbi started.
"Do you, Egon Spengler, take Janine Marie Melnitz to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold," The rabbi asked.
"I do," I proudly answered, feeling my heart flutter.
"Do you Janine Marie Melnitz take Egon Spengler to have and to hold, until death does you part," he questioned.
"I do," the two sweetest words came from my fiancée's lips in her lovely Brooklyn accent.
"I pronounce you man and wife; you may kiss the bride."
Now, it was time for my move. First, I lifted her veil and then placed my hands on Janine's back. I then lowered her down a bit and gave her an open-mouth kiss that neither of us would forget. I put all of my love and passion into that kiss, and boy, she returned it!
"Wow!" Janine gasped when I pulled her back up and removed my mouth from hers. I held her tightly to me because she was my wife and because she seemed a little lightheaded.
"Oh my God," Janine exclaimed, trembling a little, so I tightened my grip around her waist.
"Are you ok, my Angel ?" I worriedly whispered.
"Yes! Of course, I am! We did it," she revealed with a sweet smile.
"Not yet. We have to break the glass," I recalled, raising my left eyebrow. Janine loved when I did that, so I accommodated her occasionally to make her smile.
"Yes, of course," she drily remarked, squeezing her body close to me. Her love radiated from her body like the warm sun.
"Now the breaking of the glass," the rabbi joyfully announced.
This tradition, where a glass wrapped in a cloth was traditionally stepped on by the groom (sometimes the bride, too), symbolized the commitment to each other.
Blithely, we peered at each other, placed our toes on our right foot, and simultaneously stepped down on the cloth.
"Mazel tov," everyone yelled as Janine, and I observed.
"May I present to you, Dr. and Mrs. Egon Spengler," the rabbi amusedly stated.
After kissing chastely, we waved as Raymond and Winston stood up and yelled "Janegon" three times at Peter's lead. We chuckled at them.
"Love you, mwah,"' Janine dramatically blew kisses at my three colleagues at their performance.
"This better not be a dream, Egon Spengler! If I wake up in the firehouse sleeping in a twin bed with you next to me with Ray snoring on the other side of the room, there's going to be trouble," Janine warned, pinching my side with her long nails.
"Ow!" I yelped, rubbing the area with my hand, and she offered her tempting lips as an apology.
"Nope, this is all real," I huskily promised, "I am all yours, and you are all mine now. Forever."
Opening her eyes, Janine smiled and pulled me down for a heart-wrenching kiss.
"It's about time, Egon 'freakin' Spengler," she teased afterward.
"I am the luckiest man alive, Mrs. Egon 'freaking' Spengler," I confessed as we began to stroll among the crowd.