That First Year
Bella drove up in a black '99 Honda Accord. I wondered if Jacob had gone with her to buy it.
She glanced at me briefly before starting across the parking lot hunched, arms tight around her chest.
She stopped three feet away.
With a deep breath, she finally looked up at me.
"Hi, Bella," I murmured. I smiled warmly, no teeth, just trying to make her more comfortable. Trying not to scare her with the startling energy rioting within me.
"Hi, Edward," she mumbled.
"It's nice to see you again."
The pleasantry, the understatement was not delivered nearly as casually as I'd intended.
Her face suddenly crumpled. She threw her arms around me and hid her face against my chest.
Only the brick wall bore witness to my twisted expression. Cautiously I wrapped my arms around her, pretending this warm creature was mine.
She smelled only faintly of him. Had that been intentional?
She straightened abruptly, sniffling and wiping her eyes too roughly on her jacket sleeve.
Composed, reassuring smile in place, I looked into her eyes. "Just catching up, remember?"
Her laugh sounded like a sob. "Just a couple of old friends," she agreed with a brittle smile.
The booth was red, its cushion overstuffed. I wasn't the only one with untouched food.
We talked about Charlie and community college classes and the weather.
I asked about the Honda.
"Oh," she laughed. "Of course. You must have been so happy to see the Chevy retired."
I simply chuckled, not wanting to lie.
"Yeah, with driving up to Port Angeles all the time for school I needed something a little more dependable. Something with better gas mileage. I fell in love with this twenty-year-old lime green Bug but Jacob talked..." Her voice trailed off. "Me out of it..." She reached for her glass of water, nearly knocking it over in her haste.
"Bella, you're allowed to talk about Jacob."
She stared down at the water in her glass.
"Am I?" she breathed.
"Yes," I said firmly.
"Okay." Her careful eyes probed mine.
She pursed her lips. "So, what about you? What have you been up to?"
"I've spent some time with my family." It wasn't a lie but it wasn't really a true answer to her question, either.
"Oh." She bit the inside of her cheek. "What else?"
"Um. Mostly that."
"Mm." It was a disappointed sound. Concerned.
"Tell me more about college."
She did. And she finally talked more about Jacob and her friends - "like family" - in La Push. It hurt but it was good. I wanted her life to be rich and it seemed it was.
"Well..." We stood out front again. It was dark.
"No goodbyes, remember?" I said softly.
"No goodbyes," she agreed.
She'd driven almost out of earshot when she started crying.