It was dark out when Naruto ducked into Ichiraku's, the street illuminated by lights from stalls and vendors. A few fireflies roamed about after him; sometimes they followed him from the forest, attracted by his warm chakra. "Ey, Gaara," he greeted with a grin, clapping his fellow Jinchuriki on the shoulder as he slid into the stool next to him. "Naruto," Gaara greeted with a small nod. "Congratulations to your teammate." "Yeah, his request might not make sense now, but it will," Naruto chuckled. "Although my whole team gathered crystals together. I just handed them off to him before the end." At Gaara's raised eyebrow, he elaborated. "Eh…I didn't want to take the off chance I'd run into someone who didn't like me. Because of you-know-what." Gaara frowned, obviously dissatisfied with such an answer, but nodded. "I see." Ayame set a glass of water in front of him. "Why would there be a concern about someone acting in prejudice against you? Is that not a concern you should take to the Hokage?" Neji asked from behind him. Naruto jumped and swiveled to look at the genin. "Geez, Neji, I told you to quit sneaking up on me." Neji glanced at Gaara with a slight tilt of the head. "Oh, right, this is Gaara, and that's Neji," Naruto said, pointing in tandem with his introductions. "Gaara's a friend from Suna." "A pleasure to make your acquaintance." Neji bowed his head politely, taking a stiff glance around the stall. "Likewise." "…You can sit down, you know," Naruto said with a lopsided smile. Neji sat down, looking just as composed and out of his element. "Oh, hey," Ayame said cheerfully, swishing out of the back room, "two more and we'll have a full house. What do you guys want?" "Miso," Naruto replied instantaneously, nearly before she'd finished speaking, making his two companions sit with small sweatdrops. "Three bowls," he said with a grin, holding up three fingers. "Three bowls of miso comin' up," Teuchi called from the back, fully able to hear them since it was only a few feet away and divided by a curtain. "What about your friends?" A wide smile stretched Ayame's lips. He'd rarely brought anyone to the stall, and she was glad to see him making friends other than Sasuke and Sakura. Gaara stared at the one-page menu she'd given him. "I confess I have never tried this type of food before. What do you suggest?" It was obvious he was asking Naruto, as he'd turned to stare at him. "Ehhh," Naruto leaned over and pointed at the menu. He'd never had a concept of 'personal space'. "Get him a miso and beef, hmm?" "Miso and beef," Teuchi yelled from the back. "Uzu- Naruto," Neji corrected himself, eyes glued to the menu in hand, "should I order the same?" "Nah, you get the chicken. That's your favorite, eh?" Neji nodded. "One, please," he asked Ayame, before pausing. "Naruto." "Yeh?" "How did you know chicken was my favorite?" Naruto paused, three sets of eyes swiveling to him. "Uh…" Your uncle told me while we were talking about you while I was at your clan compound writing up a new law and conducting surveys on Branch and Main members for court hearings. Well, technically, he couldn't talk about the latter part. He fell back to his usual habits, waving his hands as he weakly smiled. "Maaagic." Neji narrowed his eyes at him, but said nothing. You're an idiot, Kurama's voice said in his head. The fox had come up behind him, sitting like a dog waiting for its master to throw it a scrap of food, while in reality Naruto always gave him the pork chunks from his second and third bowls. Gaara turned to stare. "Is that?" Kurama looked at him, raised an eyebrow, and yipped. "Yeah," Naruto replied. "Is that a summon of yours?" Neji asked curiously, leaning back to eye the beast. "Or a partner like Akamaru?" "Partner's more like it," Naruto grinned and scratched his cheek. "He's not really a pet or anything, though he doesn't exactly help me much when we're fighting other shinobi." He shot the fox a glare, making a noise oddly reminiscent of a snicker escape its throat. While the Kyuubi certainly helped him by lending him chakra, when he was in fox form he let Naruto do most of the work, tending to stay perched on his shoulder and give sarcastic, usually unhelpful advice. "You know what, you're really starting to irritate me with that," a voice drifted in from outside. A moment later, Kankuro tossed aside the flaps and stepped in, annoyance spread across his face. "Oh. Hey, Gaara." "Kankuro." "You too, Naruto." "Yo." Shino seemed to slither in after him, hands in his pockets. "Uzumaki-san." "Hey, Shino!" Naruto waved his chopsticks, tossing a piece of pork over his shoulder. Kurama leapt into the air and caught it halfway to the ground, making a growling noise of satisfaction. "Full house!" Ayame boomed, clapping her hands. "Sit down, sit down!" She gestured to the two open seats, leaving no room for argument. "One plain, please," was all Shino said. "Eh, whatever he's havin'," Kankuro ordered, pointing at Gaara. "Hey, didja win?" Naruto asked, planting his heels on the rim of his stool and one hand on Neji's shoulder so he could stand and peer over both his and Kankuro's heads to address Shino. "Why d'ya assume he'd win?" Kankuro asked grumpily, a pout on his lips, before Shino could answer. "It was a tie," Shino replied smoothly, ignoring Kankuro. "Yeah, well next time you're doing down." "I assure you, I will not be the one who tastes defeat 'next time'." Ayame stepped around the bar and set down a small bowl on the floor, giggling when Kurama jumped at it and began devouring its contents. "Wanna make a bet?" Naruto whispered, retreating to his seat with a mischievous grin. Neji quirked an eyebrow at him. "Two hundred ryo on Shino," Naruto continued in a sing-song voice, waving a few bills in front of him. Neji rolled his eyes, but allowed a small smirk to appear on his lips. "Three on the puppet user in a sand climate, three on the bug user in a forest or rock climate." Naruto grinned and took out a pen, writing on his napkin. "What about you, Gaara?" Gaara eyed the pen in Naruto's hand before his eyes flicked up to the blond's, watching his grin widen expectantly. "I suppose three hundred on my brother in the climate of our home village, and the same amount on your shinobi in the climate of this village." "Awesome." Naruto did have to admit, Squad Seven had a bit of a gambling problem. He could already feel the disapproving look Tobirama would give him when he found out just how much Naruto had staked in the betting pool. "Hey, are you betting on me?" Kankuro squawked. "Betting on 'us'," Naruto corrected. Shino leaned over his shoulder to glance at the napkin. Naruto sweatdropped. I should pay more attention. Usually they can't sneak up on me so easily. "I see," was all Shino said, walking back to the end of the line to his seat. If Naruto didn't know better, he would have said Shino sounded pleased. But he doubted the Aburame cared about gambling. Well, he had gotten in on the pool… "-ammit, Senju, buzz off!" Oh, no. Starting to sweat, Naruto leaned back and peeked out through the flaps. Izuna galloped down the street, Hashirama on his heels, waving his hands frantically. "Wait, Izuna! I swear I don't want to fight! Just tell me where he is!" "Eff you!" "You both look like fools." "Screw you, Tobirama! Don't you get in on this!" "Don't order me around, Uchiha." "What're you going to do, kill me again?" "Tobirama! Izuna! Please!" "There are no words for how disrespectful you are-" Izuna made a rude gesture, making Tobirama's brow start to twitch. "You childish little-" "Please tell me where Madara is?" Hashirama begged, cutting Izuna off at an intersection. The Uchiha simply flew through him, making the Shodaime jump in surprise. "Been doing this longer than you!" Izuna called as he disappeared around the corner. The two Senju took off in pursuit. "Naruto?" Naruto startled, swiveling back around to face a slightly concerned-looking Gaara, staring at him with a frown. "Ah, sorry, sorry, just some ghosts passing through, don't mind me," he blurted, laughing as he waved one hand back and forth. "…ghosts?" Neji asked, a look of disbelief flashing across his face. "Oh, yes. Naruto-kun sees them all the time," Ayame broke in. Her manner implied she found nothing at all weird with the statement, nor was she surprised to find the supernatural existed. "…you see ghosts," Kankuro repeated flatly. I wonder why they don't believe me, Naruto thought. "I see," Gaara said, tilting his head. "Do you know any of them?" "Never met a ghost I knew before they died, but I'm friends with a lot of them." "You believe him?" Kankuro squawked. "Why would I not?" Gaara asked, wearing a blank stare tinged with a slight measure of mild confusion. Both Shino and Neji turned interested frowns on Naruto, wondering if he was telling the truth or not. An ANBU pushed through the flaps, eyes looking around before alighting on Naruto. "Uzumaki-san," she said, holding out a scroll. "A message from Tsunade-sama." "Thanks, Badger," Naruto said, throwing her a wave before she shunshin'd away. He opened the message up, keeping his expression empty. "Do you have a mission?" Shino asked, somehow having eaten his meal without once revealing his face to the rest of the stall. Naruto made a mental note to somehow unmask him before they both died. "Nah." Naruto's eyes flickered up and down the scroll before he rolled it back up and stuffed it in his pocket. "Just helping baa-chan with something." The "something" being he had to appear in front of the council the next morning and give his report on the Caged Bird Seal. Naruto grunted when Kurama jumped onto his lap with no warning, turning around several times before he arranged himself and sat down with a trolling grin. Ayame squealed and leaned over the counter to pet him, and he gave Naruto a smug look. You fake, he thought. "…may I?" Naruto blinked in surprise, looking up at Gaara. The redhead was side-eying Kyuubi, looking unsure of if he should be wary or not. You may have the privilege of touching me,Kurama replied loftily, chin up and eyes closed. Gaara raised his head slightly in surprise at the voice in his mind, slowly setting one hand atop the fox's head as he continued. Oi, Shukaku, are you in there? Let my host in, bastard. A groan resounded from the depths of Gaara's mind. Ugh, go away, Kyuubi. Naruto wondered at the zoned out look on Gaara's face before grinning and tilting his head, as if to say Not so scary, eh? Kurama's ears flicked back and forth rapidly as he argued with his brother. Gaara replied with a small smile, nodding. Fine! Just don't disturb my sleep, stupid humans! There was a jostling sound as Naruto caught the tail end of the sentence in his head. I didn't know we could talk to other hosts. I can talk to my siblings at any time, Kurama returned haughtily. …I just let you in on the conversation. You two seem to get along very well, Gaara said, making Naruto jump, having forgotten he could hear him. He sounded overly polite, having only recently learned how to have a conversation with someone without killing them. However, Naruto could detect something like… Yeah, we do. Didn't quite…hit it off at first, Naruto admitted with a wince and sheepish grin. Kurama thumped him in the side with his tail. But they're not monsters. If anything, he was the only one who understood what it was to be treated like I was. And yet you disturb me anyway, Shukaku's slightly insanity-tinged voice said in mock surprise. Gaara startled, and Naruto noticed a strange look pass over his face. I oughtta- He went into an incoherent ramble. Must not be used to that, huh? He usually just told me to kill people, Gaara replied. Always restless, shifting and lashing about within me. Since your… 'talk', however, he's been strangely quiet. Not my fault that fox is a bastard!Shukaku roared, making Gaara wince. Kurama let out a long mental sigh. You should just work with your host instead of against him, baka raccoon. It will work out much better for you in the long run. Oh, what, help the little human and be his slave? And who are you calling a moron? Shukaku snapped out at him from Gaara's mindscape. Kurama gave him a derisive look from Naruto's, poking the point at which they merged so they could talk with one of his tails. I'm the one who's sitting in a valley rather than a prison, he sniped, preening when Shukaku eyed the grass beneath his feet with a glare. Or, you could continue to be stubborn and have the Akatsuki rip you out of him to become part of the Juubi again. What? Shukaku squawked, nearly falling over. Yeah, watch out for people in black cloaks with red clouds, Naruto added. Didn't the priest teach you anything? Honestly, what's the boy done to you? Kurama sighed, examining his claws in a bored manner. Oh, I don't need you lecturing me, you loony mutt. Good luck with that, Naruto said in a sympathetic tone, patting Gaara on the shoulder. Kankuro had tuned everyone out, ducking his head to devour his ramen like a starving man, chalking up their weird staring contest to a Jinchuriki thing. The last two patrons, however, were left out of the loop, Neji side-eying Naruto while Shino was seemingly focused on his bowl. Naruto laughed, and Gaara finally retracted his hand from Kurama's head. The Hyuuga and Aburame gave each other a look over Kankuro's head. There was definitely something odd going on there. Naruto dreaded going into the mission room. Hashirama and Tobirama hadn't been at the council meeting- no doubt with Tobirama chasing Hashirama as he went on a wild goose chase around the village- but they were bound to be hovering at Tsunade's side two days later. He'd managed to avoid them, but he supposed his time was up. Oh, well. Screw this. He was so throwing Madara under the bus. Squad Seven, sans Kakashi, filtered in around a team of genin raring to go for their first C-rank, their jounin sensei sighing in a tired way. Naruto waved at Iruka, sitting in a long line of chuunin assigning missions. And, of course, the two dead Hokage hovered on either side of the current Hokage, eyes lighting up when they saw him for entirely different reasons. "Naruto-kun!" Hashirama boomed, flying over Tsunade's head and the desk to land at his side. "I haven't seen you! It's almost like you've been avoiding us…" "Oh, yes, almost," Tobirama said with an eye-roll. "Ah, Squad Seven. I've got the perfect mission for you," Tsunade went on with a smile. A depressed cloud moved in over Hashirama's head as Naruto completely ignored him, arms crossed behind his head and eyes closed. "A B-rank escort mission. That would be your fifth B-rank, correct? Quite impressive for someone your age." Sasuke took the scroll she offered and looked it over. "It could develop into an A-rank if you run into difficulties," she continued. "I'll let you decide among yourselves who squad captain will b-" "Sasuke," said Sakura. "Sasuke," Naruto yawned. "Who are we escorting?" Sasuke asked, ignoring them. Tsunade arched a brow in surprise, having expected Naruto to want to lead. "I don't know," she said with a shrug. "Every four years our neighbor, the Land of Tea, holds a dedication ceremony at the Todoroki Shrine. Every time, we're asked to escort a runner from start to finish, but this year, the messengers bringing the request were attacked on the way." "Who attacked them?" Sakura asked. Tsunade shrugged again. "When you meet Boss Jirocho, he'll fill you in." "Boss Jirocho? Ah, that guy you were in debt to!" Naruto said cheerfully. Tsunade scowled. "Don't bring up my debts, you little brat!" "Sure, sure, baa-chan, whatever." "And don't call me that!" Naruto opened one eye to stare at Hashirama. "You're going to follow me, aren't you?" A determined look passed over the Shodaime's face. "… Yes." "Who's going to follow you?" Tsunade asked in confusion. "Your grandad." "Excuse me?" "He sees ghosts," Sakura added helpfully. "…ghosts," Shizune repeated. Disbelief was clear in her expression, eyes flickering to the space around Naruto. "…and you expect me to believe that?" Tsunade asked, not rudely, rather in genuine confusion. "No," was all Naruto said. A child suddenly poked his head out from behind Shizune, looking hopeful. "Can you see me?" he asked excitedly. "Yeah." "Awesome! Tell Tsuna-chan I'm always with her and she doesn't have to miss me anymore!" "Hello Nawaki-chan!" Hashirama greeted cheerfully. "Hello jii-chan!" Naruto wondered why he hadn't seen the child sooner. Maybe it had something to do with baa-chan coming back to the village, he thought. Her aura before she stopped having a pity party was depressive enough to ward off helpful spirits. "Oh hey," he said, lifting his hand to point, "your brother is-" "Can we leave already?" Sasuke asked, irritation laced in his voice as he dragged Naruto and Sakura out by the elbows. "…did he say my brother?" Tsunade asked after a moment of silence. "All right, now can you tell me?" Hashirama asked hopefully. He and his brother floated along on either side of him, while Naruto just stared at the sky, Kurama sleeping with his small body wrapped around his neck. He sighed. "Fine," he said, drawing out the 'i'. "I met him some time after the chuunin exams." Sasuke and Sakura ignored his chatter, looking over a map. Tobirama raised his eyebrows. "That long?" he asked disapprovingly. Naruto shrugged. "He was stuck in a cave. No offense, Uncle Tobi, but I didn't want you going over and ruining his… rehab…" They gave him matching frowns. "Rehab?" Hashirama asked carefully. "Well. He spent several years leeching off a tree to stay alive-" "What? But he died at the-" Hashirama began with a confused expression. "Yeah, no…he really didn't…he faked dying," Naruto said, as if he were explaining it to a toddler, gesturing with his hands. "He faked his death?" Tobirama's face slackened in shock. "What on earth was he doing afterward? Something dangerous?" He scowled. "Well, that's a longer conversation, but all you really need to know right this minute is he was insane and wanted to use the moon to take over the world." They paused, staring at him. "I'm not joking. The moon," he snickered. "But Izuna talked him out of it and he's been…" He tilted his head, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "Doing better." "Better?" Hashirama asked, the hopeful expression he'd worn a moment before returning. "Better?" Tobirama asked, eyes narrowing in suspicion. "Okay, look. I'm going to be bluntly honest here and hope you don't get offended." Confusion tugged at their features. He pointed to Tobirama, talking around the piece of wheat he'd been chewing on. "You were too suspicious of him back in the day when he wasn't cray-cray and didn't want to take over the world and that didn't help things. He's done a lot of bad now and I'm not defending that but back in the days of your youth he wasn't half bad. The type of guy who helped little kids when they fell down. The guy had an Eternal Mangekyo, and I know you're all from the hard war-torn child soldier tough era but getting one of those really does a number on your psyche. He lost all his brothers, and his clan wasn't acting nicely with him either, so who was literally the only person he had for support? You," he said, pointing to Hashirama. Guilt flashed across his face, but Naruto ignored it. "Did you know he overheard some BS conversation you two had in a classroom or something about him going off the rails and he heard you, well, say not much in his defense?" They both froze, like children who'd been caught stealing cookies. "I'm not saying you could have stopped him from making the choices he did, because only he could have done that, but hey." He threw up his hands. "Maybe if you had both tried to better the situation instead of making things all tense and crap things would've ended up differently. I don't know. But the whole time he was being manipulated by some plant creature your ancestor made that wanted to groom him into being a host she could possess. So he messed up things and I'm the one who has to deal with it, because hey, you're all dead! Deader than door nails. Did you know he started a mercenary group, by the way?" he asked, off topic, throwing them for a loop before he went on. "But anyway, he was seriously off his rocker and spent, like, fifteen years in that cave before Izuna found him. It was kind of funny, really, but I didn't laugh because I thought he might possess me. He's such a grouch, but seriously, do not mention the moon plan. It's a sensitive topic. I keep asking him for whatever he was on when he came up with that, but he won't tell me." The brothers stared at him in silence. "I was kind of afraid he'd turn into a poltergeist, which are really dangerous and can actually kill people, and actually do you think Madara actually was ever taking something? Because I was joking but that might explain some things," Naruto said to fill the silence. "Naruto, we're stopping at a tea house!" Sakura called from ahead. "Save me a table!" Naruto called back. "This is all my fault," Hashirama groaned into the table, hair splayed out around him. Naruto stared when the house owner set down a cup of tea in it. Hashirama didn't notice. Naruto decided to forego tea for the moment. "It wasn't your fault, it was Kaguya's," he said, going to pat the man's head before realizing it wouldn't connect. "This Kaguya," Tobirama said, sitting with his arms crossed and narrowed eyes staring straight at him- a bit disconcerting, really. "Consumed the fruit of the God Tree." "And got chakra out of it. And turned into a gigantic monster." "Her children, the Sage of Six Paths and his brother-" "Broke it up into nine pieces and sealed its husk into the moon. Zetsu-the-plant-thing, according to one of Indra's ghosty grandkids, anyway, manipulated Madara into gaining the Rinnegan so he could revive Kaguya. Yeah, he's been playing run around with both your clans since forever. Someone told me Aloe Vera's running around with the Akatsuki." "This is concerning." Tobirama turned his frown to glance out to the forest. "Is there some way to be sure of Kaguya staying sealed away?" Naruto shrugged. "Kill Zetsu, I guess." "Well, if 'kill Zetsu' is the name of the game," Sasuke spoke up from next to him, having been ignoring most of the conversation, as he looked up with a smirk. "We have an inside man." Naruto's eyes lit up. "Potentially four inside men…and women," he added, rubbing his hands together in glee. "You have informants?" Tobirama asked. "Not…yet," Naruto replied. "But Sasuke's brother is a member." Hashirama raised his head, looking horrified. "Sasuke-kun's brother is part of the group trying to kill you?" "He's undercover," Naruto said casually, taking a sip of tea now that Hashirama's hair was out of it. "All right, listen. I'm not saying I will break your arms, I'm not saying I won't break your arms." Naruto paused and looked to the end of the table where Sakura sat, shooting an off-putting smile at the newcomer Naruto hadn't noticed. "But I have a man I'm going to marry, so scurry away, before I break your arms." The boy leaned back, looking a tad insulted. "Geez, can't take a joke." "Is there a reason this is still happening? I feel like there needs to be a reason," Sasuke began irritably. "Buzz off, moron." He was beginning to get a headache, half listening to Naruto talk to thin air and half listening to idiotic flirting. "Moron?" The boy's eyebrow twitched. "Psh. Just like you shinobi. Think you're better than everyone else, do you?" He appeared quite agitated towards something. Naruto detected a hint of jealousy, but mostly irritation. Sakura let out a long sigh. "Children are so arrogant these days…" Tobirama muttered towards the table. "Look," Sakura said, not unkindly, as she plastered on a fake smile. "Why don't you go back to your table? We're just taking a break from our mission." "Like I need a bunch of genin bossing me-" "Chuunin," Naruto yawned obliviously, setting his chin on his arms and closing his eyes. His correction set Idate off, the twitch becoming worse and his tone more angered. "Well then, just let me get back to your mission." "Thank you," Sasuke said, relaxing, thinking he was serious. Idate glared. Either he's faking or he's dumb, he thought. "He's not leaving," Naruto complained. "Sasuke, do the thing." Calmly, Sasuke turned towards him. "Naruto, despite what Madara and Izuna tell you, putting civilians under genjutsu is neither fun nor legal." "Civilian-" Idate cut himself off, gritting his teeth. They weren't wrong, after all. Tobirama gave him a disapproving look. "I told you those two were a bad influence," he said to his brother. "They're not bad influences," Naruto argued. "Just different ones." Hashirama's forehead crinkled at his baseless distinction. "Who are you talking you?!" Idate screeched. "Would you leave us alone?" Sakura repeated, teeth gritted in irritation as she resisted the urge to punch him through the ceiling. "Damn shinobi, always so-" Both Idate and Sasuke's squad mates jumped when he slammed his hands on the table, standing up and turning to face the runner with his Sharingan active. "Leave," he hissed. The effect was broken when Naruto started clapping. "Perfect," he said. "Just like Izu does it." "F-fine," Idate stuttered, turning on his heel and speed walking away. That kid…there's something off about him. Sasuke's blood red eyes turned in his mind, making him shudder. "We should get back on the road," Sasuke sighed, taking out his wallet to pay the bill. The owner came up to their table, wearing a bright smile. "It's so nice of you three to pay that boy's bill for him." The table cracked beneath Sakura's grip. As it turned out, their little scam artist was faster than he looked. Squad Seven watched him charge into the distance from a tree branch. "Want me to catch him, boss?" Naruto drawled. He was the fastest of them all, and could have done it easily. Sasuke sighed. "It isn't our mission. Just let him be. We should get going for the Land of Tea." "Aye-aye, Capitan." Naruto threw him a jaunty salute. "Should've just let me eat him," Kurama muttered. A few hours later, Naruto and Sakura caught sight of Idate in Jirocho's home and let out matching screams. "You again?!"