Author's notes are bolded to be easily ignored.

Note: If you want to leave a comment, maybe let me know what you think about switching to Kakashi's POV for a section? If I were to continue, I'd probably have a section from his POV every 3-5 chapters, depending on what's going on. Or I might have regular Kakashi POV excerpts. Or whatever seems fun to write lol.

I have no idea what I'm doing. This is the furthest I've ever gotten with a longfic before please send help.

This chapter's a bit short but it's taken two weeks to write, so I'm just going to post it.

…

Kakashi watched, nonplussed, as Yuka hurried away. That might've set a record for 'longest indirect staring match' between the two. Was she busy? Why stop for so long?

Did she really carry a jacket around in case it got too chilly? In the middle of Spring? That was so cute, though.

Naruto frowned at him.

"There's no shinobi rule that says you have to stare through the back of my skull," Kakashi said this as kindly as he could, "Did you have a question?"

"…Nope! I'll get back to work."

Suspicious.

"Here," Kakashi smiled, "All you have to do is work without sensei's help for forty-five minutes. After that, I'll jump in. Sound good?"

Naruto nodded, "We'll get it done before the time's up. Believe it!"

"That's forty-five minutes starting now, by the way. It only counts if you're working together! Single unit. Move as one."

"Naruto, get over here! Now!" Sakura growled.

"Make sure to stay hydrated," Kakashi added absently, pulling out his book. This was only their second exercise together. Inevitably, he would go over their work with them and explain what they did wrong. In this case, how to wash a window without leaving streaks. Riveting.

Back to Make-Out Paradise.

What page was he on? Not that it mattered. He'd read so many times he could open any page and know where the story was. Page 85. The scene where the stepmother admits to ruining the wedding dress Sayuri's best friend made for her. Why? Because she was having an affair with the fiancé. That bitch!

Shoddy footwork had a sound, and it was obvious. Kakashi appeared lost in his book. He observed them again. Closely. What were they like when they thought their superior wasn't paying close attention?

In five minutes, something went wrong. Five. Minutes.

"Wow! You're amazing!"

"Wait a minute, I can do that, too…!"

Kakashi peered over the novel and down the edge of the building. Sasuke had somehow gotten himself nearly upside down, one hand on the ledge of the roof, free hand scrubbing the window, two feet against the wall. Naruto clumsily tried to imitate it.

"Tch. This is just faster."

Oh, well, sure. Similarly, it's *just faster* to do a backflip before you weed a garden.

Kakashi's subordinates were positioned to ruin Mr. Fujioka's windows. The owner of the café did them a huge favor by allowing coordinated activities on his building. He wasn't going to let that blow up in his face.

"Sasuke. Naruto. Stop. Up here, now."

Naruto fumbled with his grip. Fear sparked in the boy's eyes as he grasped why Kakashi kept telling everyone not to rely so much on their hands.

Many jonin would have watched him plummet. Three floors weren't a lot if he didn't land on his neck – even a brand-new genin should know how to land. The real old school types would argue it was important that they learn how to deal with physical pain and injury, especially resulting from their own bad decisions.

Sure, that was true, but…

Kakashi pulled him back to the roof, stopping a potential freefall.

…

Hi there, Dad,

Can't believe Hiroto and his wife already have a baby. Tell them I said congratulations., if he wants to hear from me at all. Anyways, I'm alright, I just miss everyone. Thank you so much for including Mom's war photography., I'm sorry I made you look at that again.

It's good to hear they've finally finished building the new school. Sometimes thinking about our hometown makes me sad, but

My students are doing great. Thinking about moving to older students somewhere down the line, but I'm happy about where I am right now.

I met this guy and I don't know what you'd think of him

Visit Konoha, some time. I will pay for it myself if I have to!During the Summer, it's beautiful.

It's been so many years, Dad,

…

It was Saturday night, and Yuka tried to decide what to wear.

She liked the way she dressed. Slacks. Blazers. Sweaters. Tasteful accessories and light makeup. Half business, half casual, totally hip and cool. Her 'fashion choices', if they could be called that, were pleasant and practical.

A hot date at a slightly shady bar allowed for a bit more experimentation. She pulled out the bottom of her dresser and examined a black skirt. It wasn't… inappropriate. All it did was expose more leg than she was used to. The hem stopped too far above the knee to wear at work. Plenty of women wore things like this. Just not at work.

At some point, she saw the skirt and wanted it enough to buy it. There were no opportunities for cute clothes, before.

Mom would already be reaching for the red lipstick and boots. You'll look cool! It's a Saturday night, have a little fun.

Yeah. Yuka would look very cool. She wasn't ready for red lipstick, but her old boots should look alright. And then a leather jacket…

Would gloves be too much? Should she shave her thighs?

She glanced in the mirror and couldn't help but laugh. It was a bit of a retread of her 'punk' days, but without the thick, dark pants and contentious symbols. Might as well cover her hair in gel and muss it up. Ha. No more hair gel. Ever.

Big Cat trotted into her bedroom and settled on futon, falling asleep almost instantly.

Kakashi seemed less intimidating than he had a couple weeks ago. Sure, he was shinobi. Thousands of men in Konoha could claim the same thing. He worked an unethical job in an unethical system. Given certain circumstances, he had both the ability and sort-of-legal 'right' to kill. Nothing about that was hard to comprehend.

And yes, Yuka knew exactly how she felt regarding the matter of coercion and killing.

Never mind that. Right now, she had a date. Lace up those boots, button up the jacket and apply a slightly more daring lip gloss than neutral pink.

Yuka took another look in mirror.

"You know what, I'm pretty hot."

…

Wearing the outfit on was one thing. Going outside with it was another matter entirely. Much of Konoha became a dead zone at night. That only meant the spotlight was on if Yuka happened to pass anyone on the street. Alright, most people were just trying to get home. She just felt like she was under a damned spotlight.

These boots squeaked. Why hadn't she noticed it before?

The route from her neighborhood took her to the north of the market. Getting to the south end would take a lot of walking. Though it was nighttime, the air was still warm.

Every stall looked as though they'd somehow been abandoned for years. In the shadow, Konoha looked so much older. The city was only a century old. Why did these walls make her feel like a peasant from the ancient days?

It was creepy out here. Only a stray dog rummaging through some garbage broke the silence. No silent ambience of patrolling ninja, either.

As she approached the South End, people dotted the steps and side-streets. Very few women. Konoha was just 'that' kind of town – of those who did go out and drink, most of them were men. The market strip's south end was a macho hellscape that reminded Yuka of the stupid things she did with paint as a teenager.

She loved it.

Sketchy urban landscapes spoke to her soul, mixing nostalgia with the petty thrill of taking empty risks.

Isolated loiterers shifted into a small crowd. A few merchants peddled goods. This was the 'night market'. Cheap shit, shady shit, knock-off handbags, porn, and foreign cigarettes without filters sold as novelties.

Yuka and Kakashi hadn't agreed on a meeting place, though the bar she wanted to take him to wasn't far.

A creatively obscene scroll caught Yuka's eye. No, she didn't usually enjoy porn, she just had a soft spot for trashy art. And this one was interesting. It was a woman in an elaborate, tattered kimono, half transformed into a snake, her breasts exposed. The snake tail was wrapped around a naked man's ankle. It couldn't hurt to stop and take a look -

"I've seen this one before."

Gah! White hair - appearing from nowhere!

Wonderful. Excellent timing, Kakashi.

He wore a loose white top, revealing his mask as just one part of a tight, dark undershirt. In place of the eyepatch, he covered up with his forehead protector. Yuka got the impression he preferred it that way.

Yuka turned to him with a smile, "It's a reprint?"

"Yeah. Snake Lady is in a series of sexualized fairy tales. See the one with the fox woman next to it? Some of the guys I worked with like to collect them. Prints have been circulating among shinobi for… fifty years?"

"Didn't know shinobi were holding up the vintage porn industry."

Kakashi eyed the painting pensively, "Well, do you like it?"

Yep, her face was hot, turning red, "It's fascinating to me. The design evokes dread as well as sensuality. It's also misogynistic but that's par the course for a copy of a fifty-year-old painting."

"Huh. Want to elaborate on that one, Yuka?"

"In this case, women are depicted as dishonest, right? She hides her true form underneath a feminine façade until the man is vulnerable," Yuka shrugged.

"Isn't she the vulnerable one, here?" he locked eyes with her for briefest of moments, "She didn't choose to be a snake… and now her secret's exposed. The idea behind the story is that she asked to be left alone during certain hours, but the man barged in on her."

It felt like he was looking for something. Searching her expression.

"Then it's sexualizing Snake Lady's humiliation," Yuka added.

"…Yeah, you're right."

Anticipatory silence. The subject matter they blundered into was far from safe and neutral, but they talked too easily. On top of that, Yuka suspected that she just enjoyed the sound of his voice. He could make anything sound at least a little interesting. Except apologist bullshit. She had no patience for that.

Wasn't Yuka supposed to be showing him a cool little hole-in-the-wall bar?

"Ready to go? I think you'll like this place, it's quiet."