A/N: This one is a bit longer than normal, so enjoy! Thank you all for all your support!!
Disclaimer: Nope, I own nada.
Thor was really starting to hate this week. If you had told him a week ago that his father was going to die, his brother was alive, he had a sister that he never knew about who was the goddess of death, Loki was going to start Ragnarok, Heimdall would betray him, Bruce would be in space and they would be fighting his brother's torturer who also wanted to wipe out half the universe, Thor would have called you a liar, a demon and would have killed you.
One minute, he was blasting the titan with lightning as he choked his little brother, the next, red washed across the landscape, leaving him in Asgard. It seemed to be a party of sorts, when everyone was happy. The Warriors Three were laughing, telling the Bilgesnipe story. Except it was modified, it rose all six of them up, Thor, Loki, Sif and the Warriors Three instead of putting Loki down.
He whipped around as someone put their hand on his shoulder. Mother. And Father.
"I'm so proud of you." Most of him was willing to accept this new reality, yet a small part of his mind whispered that this couldn't be real. He backed away hastily, only to run into a pillar. It felt solid, so it couldn't be an illusion. Reality. Thor cursed as he realized what the titan had done. But was he trapped inside the Reality stone, or was it all in his mind? More importantly, how did he get out?
"Son, Thor, are you alright?" His mother was looking at him, concerned. He turned around, only to find his brother there.
"Brother, you look as if you've seen a ghost." He turned again, this time finding him face to face with the Warriors Three.
"Why the long face? You should be celebrating!" Volstagg gave a throaty chuckle as Fandral and Hogun smashed their glasses to the ground, demanding another. Sif stepped forward.
"Are you ill? You really don't look well, Thor." Stop it! He was surrounded, with no way to escape the circle of those he had failed. It was suffocating. All of them were dead except for Loki. Loki. Where was his brother? If he was with Thanos... Thor lashed out with lightning, forcing the fakes back. They all narrowed their eyes, attacking in unison. Even though he knew they weren't real, a part of him hesitated at hurting his friends, his family.
They aren't real. He kept reminding himself of the fact as he attacked his mother, his father, his friends, his brother. Loki was the hardest to fight, which was ironic, giving how many times they had fought. They aren't real. His mother's sword sliced his shoulder. They feel real! A part of him wanted to run, but the instinct of a warrior ran deep. He would not run. He was no coward. Yet even the strongest warrior has his limits. Even Thor couldn't fight the Warriors Three, Sif, the Allfather and the two strongest magic users in the Nine Realms.
Thor tried to run from this nightmare. Certainly this couldn't be happening? It didn't matter which direction he ran, it always led back to the ones trying to kill him. Then red washed across his vision once more, the real nightmare just beginning.
The shockwave sent Thor to his feet as a SNAP echoed throughout the battlefield. He got up, scanning the area until he caught sight of his brother. Loki was bloodied from battle, staring into space blankly. Thor got up, sprinting over as the cries of anguish started. His head immediately snapped towards the noise. People were turning to ash. What in the Nine? The man with the metal arm called out to Steve before collapsing to ash. The flying birdman went next. Several more started disappearing, but Thor just focused on getting to Loki. He couldn't lose him. Not again.
For once, the fates were kind to them both. Thor stopped about a foot away from his brother, not wanting to push him away by holding him. He had a feeling Loki wouldn't respond kindly to the action. Eventually, he got up, the remaining people heading to the palace. Nobody spoke a word.
So many lives gone. Vision, Strange, Clint's entire family, most of Nebula's team, Steve's friends, Tony's friend, the catman and a bunch of other brave warriors whom Thor had no relation to. They were sitting in silence, Loki finally breaking the it.
"Nebula and I are going."
"Going? I don't think so Reindeer Games. I still don't trust you."
"I don't need your permission." Loki all but snarled.
"Where do you plan to go, brother?"
"We are going to find and kill him." He stated it so simply, it reminded Thor of his younger self. Did Loki even have a plan?
"We are all battle tired and he just defeated us easily. How are two people going to kill him? Don't you think that we should join you on this little quest of yours?"
"He is weakened by the Infinity stones, we might not get a chance like this again. Nebula and I know him the best, hence why we are going to kill him."
"And how do you plan to find him?"
"There are only so many places that someone with six Infinity stones can hide. Their energy alone make him easy to track, not to mention he just wiped out half the universe, anyone who sees him will want him dead." He and Nebula stalked out before any more protests could rise. Thor followed.
"You will not change my mind, Thor."
"At least let me come with you-" Loki turned to face him, desperation clear on his face.
"No! I need to do this alone."
"She's going with you." He pointed towards Nebula, who was still walking.
"We have to be the ones to kill him. It is the only way. Please." Thor squeezed his eyes shut, thinking of his words carefully. Thanos had tortured them both, the only way to move on was to kill him themselves.
"Okay, just make me a promise-" He opened his eyes to see that his brother was gone. Don't die.
It was a month before Loki returned, practically radiating emptiness. It was an emotion that Thor had grown very familiar with during the past few weeks.
"Brother, what happened?"
"We killed him."
"What aren't you telling me?" Loki shook his head.
"He destroyed the stones. It's impossible to bring anyone back. We were too late. Have the refugees arrived yet?" Thor nodded. Bruce and Heimdall had been snapped, but Val had taken care of the quarter that had survived. They had arrived about a week ago, saying Loki had found them and used magic to repair the ship. They were staying in Wakanda until they got the houses built in Norway where their father had died.
"I'm going to get some rest."
"Loki." Thor was glad, that for once, his brother turned around.
"I'm glad you are here." His brother nodded wearily before trekking up to the palace. Thor just stood there as the shock and loss came crashing down on him. It's impossible to bring anyone back.
In the morning, Thor woke to shouting voices. The bed next to his was made neatly, as if no one had slept in it at all. His brother had been twitching, letting out small whimpers before green rippled over his body, giving the illusion that Loki was sleeping peacefully.
Thor groaned before swinging his legs over the bed and following the sounds of shouting. It sounded like Tony. When he got closer, he realized it was Tony, his brother and Nebula.
"-What do you mean they are gone?!"
"Honestly, you have a thicker skull than Thor. I've already told you, he used the stones to destroy the stones." Loki's voice had yet to raise, but Thor could tell by the tightness that his brother was getting frustrated.
"And why should we trust you? For all we know, you could have kept them for yourself!"
"I suggest you hold your tongue before I cut it out." Nebula bit out.
"You know, you aren't making me like you more when you say things like that."
"Luckily, I could care less what you think of me." It seemed that Nebula was just as snarky as Tony and his brother. Thor came around the corner, surprised to seen Natasha, Wanda, Steve and Clint watching the exchange. Natasha and Clint seemed amused, Steve and Wanda confused. Underneath it all, lost and grieving. Even Thor could see that. A grieving Loki was a dangerous Loki.
"It doesn't matter whether or not you trust me, because I am leaving."
His brother strode in the opposite direction of Thor, as the Avengers looked at each other, wondering whether or not to follow him. Thor broke into a jog to catch up.
"Loki." He ignored him.
"Loki!" He still ignored him. Thor cursed silently.
"Loki! Would you- Just stop for a second!"
"And do what?"
"Where are you going? Loki, slow down!" He had forgotten how fast his brother could walk when he put his mind to it.
"Away."
"Why?" I just got you back! You cannot leave me! Not again! Round and round in circles we go. Now Loki turned around.
"Because I have to." There was something wrong here. Loki never, ever started a sentence with because.
"Why?"
"Why is everyone here so thick skulled!" He flung his hands up for effect.
"That does not answer my question."
"I don't have a choice." When Thor stared at him silently, Loki flung his hands about again and continued.
"All my life, I have tried to be someone I'm not. I've literally played every role out there except for mine. You called me a snake, so I turned into a snake and stabbed you. I covered up for one of your pranks right before our naming day and was named the God of Mischief the following day. So, I embraced the title, pranking and stealing and causing mayhem and mischief. I never wanted that. I talked my way out of one prank and I was named Trickster, Silver-tongue, Deceiver. I never wanted that, but I embraced it. Prince, Shadow, Son, Adopted, Traitor, Victim, Villain, Prisoner, Dead, King, Savior, Brother, Antihero, Ally, Enemy, the list goes on and on. I have embraced whatever role was given to me, yet I am yet to find my role. They will never accept, much less trust me. I want to change, I want to be better and I cannot do that here. I am leaving Thor, I'd rather leave on good terms for once. But I will leaver either way." Loki waited, not meeting his gaze as Thor mulled over what had been said.
"I think." He said slowly.
"I think that you are right." His brother's gaze snapped up at his words.
"However, I do have one, no, two requests. One, you at least tell me where you are going so that I can contact you if there is an emergency. And two, you come back." His brother went to retort, but Thor cut him off.
"When you are ready. Just come back, alive." Loki nodded slowly, and Thor released a breath that he didn't know he had been holding.
"I'll be on Svartalfheim." He turned once more to go, leaving Thor. Again. Yet he wasn't leaving Thor, because Thor was letting him go.
Five years later...
Thor was walking the beach when Rocket and Nebula greeted him.
"We think we found a way to reverse it. The snap. Where's Loki?"
"How certain are you?" He had made a promise to Loki, he would only contact him in an emergency.
"Like 95% certain." Okay.
"Either of you ever been to Svartalfheim?"
Turned out, neither of them had ever been to Svartalfheim, so Thor had to fly them over. Problem was, Thor had no idea where on Svartalfheim his brother was. Fortunately, Loki decided to scare the life out of them when they turned around to see Loki on the ship, standing behind them.
"You couldn't have sent up a flare or something?" Nebula asked.
"Where's the fun in that? I take it there's a reason you all are here?"
"We found a way to reverse the Snap, bring everyone back."
"And how do you plan to do that without the Infinity stones?"
"Apparently there's this thingy called the Quantum Realm, which the Ant person was stuck in and apparently time travels differently so-"
"Time travel."
"Hey, don't look at me like that. Quill's dad was a giant homicidal planet, I tend not to question many things." Loki and Thor exchanged a glance before looking questioningly at Nebula.
"He's not exaggerating."
The flight to Earth was silent, Loki staring out the window, Rocket and Nebula sitting in the pilot and copilot seat. They finally arrived, the Ant person looking sullenly at his empty taco shell. The five of them walked into the Avengers facility, surprised to see Natasha, Tony, Steve, Clint and Wanda there. Clint looked... Different. Angry. Empty.
"Oh great, you're here."
"I assume you are elated to see me."
"Oh you know, I was retired before these bozos came and brought me out of it."
"Tell me about it. I was having coffee when I felt a ship come into Svartalfheim. Wonderful drink, that coffee of yours."
"I was retired when you guys decided to have a civil war, dragging me out only to put me on house arrest."
"I was retired for 70 years." Thor just stood there. Did Loki, Tony, Clint and Steve just have a civil conversation? The day was simply filled with miracles.
"Hey guys, I think I got it figured out!" Tony yelled.
They all woke groggily. All except for Loki and Tony, who had stayed up all night solving time travel. The two of them were grinning like madmen. Thor couldn't remember the last time he had seen Loki so genuinely happy. It was nice.
"So, who's going to kill baby Thanos?"
"That's not how time travel works!" Both Tony and Loki shouted.
"When you go back in time, your past becomes your future and your present becomes your past, this new past cannot be changed by your new future."
"Besides, it's not even time travel." Every turned to his brother, silently asking him to elaborate. Loki sighed.
"Right now, there are Infinite timelines and realities running parallel to each other. We are not going back in time, but rather to a different reality. We can do anything we want to do in said reality, except for running into ourselves. If we run into ourselves, then that timeline/reality will merge with ours, causing all sorts of problems. Not only will everyone from that reality come into ours, that includes everyone you know, every villain you have ever fought, but when the realities merge, they will tear reality, also colliding all of the different dimensions, which will in turn shred this reality to nothingness and all of this will be for nothing." Deafening silence.
"Or, I could be wrong and nothing will happen, should we run into our past selves."
"On that cheery note, we need to figure out where and when to get the stones."
"New York, 2012. Space, Time and Mind."
"Reality is on Asgard in 2013, and with the Collector on Knowhere until Thanos."
"The only person who knew where the Soul stone was was Thanos and my sister. Both of which are dead." Oh.
"Hela might know." Loki said quietly.
"Even if she did, she is dead as well."
"There are ways to access Hel. When one is close to death, it opens a pathway for that soul between the world of the living and the world of the dead." It took a bit for this revelation to sink in, but when it did, Thor shouted,
"That is too risky!"
"Thor, it is the only way. Fate has kept me alive to know these pathways for a reason. The Void, Thanos, Odin, Kurse, Hela, Ragnarok, I have been shown these pathways so that we could win this fight."
"And if you get too close to Death? You say you have been near death several times, what happens if your luck runs out?" I can't lose you. It was an endless, deadly circle. Loki changed, Thor got him back, Loki died or left over and over and over again.
"Nebula is trained to keep me at death's doorway. I am sure Natasha is as well. When I get the information I need, Wanda will get into my head, releasing my magic so that I can heal." Thor was shaking his head. No. Please, no.
"Brother, do you trust me?" The question was hesitant, as if he was asking himself that as well. He nodded. But not for this. Yet before he could say as much, Loki, Wanda and Nebula disappeared in a flash of green. So they waited. Well, the others waited, Thor paced. He seemed to pace quite often these days.
When the trio came back, Loki looked awful and that desolate look had returned to his gaze. The same desperation when they fought on the Bifrost, when he begged father for approval, when he came back and attacked Earth, when mother died, when he begged Thor to let him go. How had he missed it?
"Vormir. The Soul stone is on Vormir." With that said, the rabbit jumped into the conversation.
"Power is on Morag until 2014, when we moved it to Xandar after Ronan tried to decimate it. And then Thanos threw all of our hard work into the trash in 2018!"
"So, New York, 2012, we'll send Nebula, Wanda, Rocket and you," Loki pointed at the ant person. Thor was happy to let his brother take charge, it probably took his mind off of... things.
"Oh me? Yeah, I'm Scott Lang, Ant-Man."
"As I was saying, you four will go to New York in 2012. We'll send Natasha and Clint to the Collector, Tony and Steve to Xandar and Thor and myself to Vormir in 2014. Those of you that know the location, give the team going there a quick history lesson."
"The Collector will not simply give up an Infinity stone, you'll have to manipulate him. Do not get separated.
"Do not touch the Power stone with your bare hand. You'll see this childlike dude dancing, that's Quill, he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer. Just knock him out or something and take his tools."
"New York. Feel free to kill any Chituari you see. Both Space and Mind will be in the Avengers tower, you can't miss it, it's a big building with a portal above it. Space is in the Tesseract, which is a blue cube and Nebula will recognize the scepter with the Mind stone. Time is with the second-rate sorcerer at 177A Bleecker Street. Though back then it was Emelia, the 'Ancient One', who was one of my students."
"Students?!"
"You mean to tell me that you were on Earth, not killing people, by your own free will and you were teaching people?!"
"Yes. We needed a safe place for the Time stone, I was tasked with teaching a couple magic users on Earth in which to entrust the stone to. Emelia had a strong connection with her magic, I simply taught her what it was and how to use it. Every species has magic in them, albeit different magic, some individuals are simply more in touch with theirs."
"Okay. Does everyone know their mission? Good. We still need to make the suits and the navigation systems, so we'll leave tomorrow morning.
22 hours later and they were all ready for their missions. The times were already punched in, all they had to do was push the PYM particles in before the whipped through time and space. It was extremely disconcerting. It felt like an inverted version of the Bifrost.
They both staggered slightly when they arrived, though Thor moreso than Loki. Loki looked worried.
"Can you feel your energy?" Thor tried to call for lightning, only for it to be smothered by another presence. What the heck?
"No. Can you?"
"No. Nothing. Let's start walking." His brother jerked his head in the direction of the massive precipice. Did they really have to walk up that?
They hiked in silence until they reached the bottom of the mountain where a floating red guy was waiting for them.
"Welcome, Thor, son of Odin, Loki, son of Frigga."
"Redskull?"
"You seek the Soul stone."
"Yes."
"You should know, it demands a price. Come." He turned, leading them up the steep, crumbling stairs.
"Who's Redskull?"
"He was the first person the Captain, Steve, fought. The S.H.I.E.L.D files said that he died. Obviously their sources were mistaken."
The stairs seemed to go on for an eternity, up and around, up and around, until at last, they reached the top.
"What is the price that the stone demands?"
"It demands that in which you love most. An everlasting exchange. A soul for a soul." Both brothers froze as realization hit. One of them had to die. Nonononononononono. Thor could not lose Loki again. Not again. Please no. Loki started walking towards the edge.
"Loki! Loki wait!"
"One of us has to go. It's the only way." Why did Loki always have to have a one-track mind?
"And why should it be you?"
"Why shouldn't it be me? You are the hero, the Avenger. I am expendable, whereas you are not." Loki shrugged.
"Besides, I have no place in the world. I will always be known as the traitor to Asgard, the son of Thanos, the Trickster. I will always be alone. You have a future, I do not." How can I have a future of my brother is dead? Every time Loki died, a part of Thor died with him. Could Thor take another loss? He wasn't sure he could.
I thought I promised you a hug!
Congratulations, you learned how to lie!
Five years, and Thor still hadn't gotten that hug.
"Before you go, you owe me a hug." Loki's eyes narrowed distrustfully at Thor's acceptance, but he obliged. Thor took a wary step, not wanting his brother to see through the facade and jump. How did his brother live behind all of these masks, lies and half-truths?
He wrapped his arms around his brother, taking note of how he stiffened.
"I'm sorry." Before Loki could analyze the words, Thor picked him up, shoving him away from the cliff as Thor stepped back and fell. Loki was screaming something along the lines of 'No, you oaf!' As Thor thought about Loki's first death, how he fell into the abyss as Thor screamed. He smiled, they had finally broke the cycle.
A/N: My favorite chapter! One more to go! Although, I may put some chapters about Loki speaking with Hela and the other's missions to get the stones. Thank you all for reading!!