It turned out that I had actually dislocated my shoulder again, sprained my left ankle, twisted my right wrist and really wacked my head, gosh I do myself in well don't I? I looked at the time and it was…...WHAT? I had managed to sleep 20hrs somehow, bloody hell. It also seemed I had messages from Tokala, Karma, Nagisa, Itona and some from an unknown number along with a few missed calls from Tendou (he must be worried), a few from that unknown number then a few emails one of which was sent to all of E class about continued training. I had a few notifications from APNeko as well, I hurried to open those first.

I haven't heard from you-APNeko

Is everything alright-APNeko

There were a few extra messages along that vain as well but the last one really caught my attention.

I can't lose you again. -APNeko

That shocked me, I need to be calm that can't be for me it had to be for someone else, he's not supposed to know. I take a few calm breaths, I need to chill a little, and go through the rest of the messages from known numbers. Karma and Nagisa were checking in and wanted details, Itona was worried since he recognised the bike in the explosion on tv. I let the boys know I was okay and told Itona he would have a new bike to work on soon curtesy of Mr K and to bug him about when it was coming in, I smirked to myself as I set a determined Itona on Karasuma.

I skimmed through the emails from Mr K saying all requests were approved so I sent a quick thankyou with a postscript about sending the bike to Itona and to discuss the particulars with him. Tokala was worried, he saw the bike as well, he also said the pack was all packed up and I should have an email about their impending arrival. Looking back through my emails I found it, they were going to be a few extra days and I needed to be there when they landed, or they might have extra problem coming through customs.

I sighed and marked it in my calendar on my phone with a reminder for the day before just to be on the safe side. The next thing I checked was the voice mails from Tori, it seemed like they had a game coming up but because I had been out for the last 20hrs he was getting a little frantic about me answering. I sent off a quick text so he could stop fretting. I needed to put Kenma out of my mind, so I checked the unknown number, oh it was Akaashi Keiji the kid that seems to keep Bokuto under leash. It seems that since I wasn't there yesterday, it sent the numbskull into a depressive stint and he hasn't come out of it and Akaashi seems to think I might be the only way out of it. I look down at my injuries and decided that I should be right to get there, though I might worry people with these wrist wrappings, eh I'll worry about it later.

Meet me out the front. – Tala

Thank you – Aka

I hooked my phone up to my wonderful all-wheel drive ATV and head off to bash some sense into everyone's favourite owl. I parked right out the front of the school and wasted to time stepping out of the car. I drew attention of the people around easily with my shoulder length red tipped white hair, hazel eyes, my old tight navy-blue long-sleeved shirt and camo jacket from our heavy assassination days, blue wash jeans and combat boots. The boots held my ankles nice and tight and the end of the sleeves were a little tighter with the wrappings keeping everything in place. All the attention made it easy for Akaashi to find me. When we got to the gym, I turned to Akaashi and stopped him before he could open the door.

"When we go in do me a favour and don't interfere. There may be words said or punches thrown but I need you to make sure no one stops what is coming. If he does something like that it's because he needs it and he has every reason to be that upset." He didn't look happy about it but once he took in my face and the serious feeling, I was giving off he sighed and nodded.

The door opened and I waited, hidden by the door. I wanted to see what had Akaashi in such a sticky spot. I listened first and all you can hear is sounds of frustration and balls hitting the floor with excessive force. I peaked in to see Bokuto had stopped with the appearance of Akaashi to bug him to set some balls after another toss, I couldn't watch anymore and walked in the gym, slamming the door closed.

Akaashi tensed and Bokuto spun around to see what had happened. He turned back to Akaashi before snapping around again and running up to me and grabbing my shoulders to give me a strong shake. I screamed and ripped myself out of his hands shit my shoulder is worse than I thought, I was not expecting that. Bokuto let go like I was fire, stunned. I took a few calming breaths and lifted my head.

"I hear you have been causing trouble for poor Akaashi and your team, Captain." I pin him with a stare. I waited to see his reaction, but he just stares before slapping me right across the face, my head snaps to the side.

"You don't get to say that, you don't get to." He was tense and angry just like I figured he would be. I pin Akaashi with a look as he goes to move. I look back to the stupid owl. "You shouldn't even be here." Its harsh but he isn't wrong, I'm supposed to be dead. He turns and goes to start hitting serves again but Akashi had taken the balls away. "I left here because of my parents, I stayed gone because of school and I stayed dead for the safety of my friends. At Kunugigaoka I ran into trouble, I knew things I shouldn't and the people I had tracked down in the process had done their homework on me as well. The people who killed my parents were after me, they were never the intended target. I lost the best teacher and my parents in the space of about a year." I kept talking but I kept my eyes closed "I got news that they had my old classmates and friends in their sights to get to me and it was then I decided that I had to protect everyone so I died and I stayed dead when I came out the other side alive after the battle on the mountain, I'm sure everyone in Japan heard of it by now." I took a deep breath and turned around to face the door, eyes open. "I watched everyone get told I was dead, I hated it, I hated doing it to everyone that needed to be told but you had to believe it, believe I was dead or they wouldn't and then neither of us would be here now. Thank you Akaashi for looking after him." I decided now was as good time as any to leave, I couldn't say anymore with Akaashi around anyway. I walk to the door and make it to the car before Bokuto even moves because I hear multiple loud shouts "BOKUTO" and not even seconds later I'm pushed into the car by the force because he can't stop. I grunt and hiss with the pain. The tight long-sleeved shirt and combat vest takes the impact and strain but god it still hurts.

I throw and elbow to get him off me and he lands on the ground, god he's dramatic. I turn and find Bakatarou sitting there with his legs crossed and looking like a sad little owl, big wide eyes and droopy hair and all. I can't keep eye contact with him, my chin drops to my chest and shoulders drop.

"Get off the ground you big oaf." I sigh and lift my head just see him jump up off the ground.

"I was devastated, I was broken when I was told you died. The only one that was a true friend was dead and I was left alone." He took a breath; he was being dead serious which was hard for him to do. "I cling to whatever I can to get through." I could see he was starting to lose what seriousness that he managed to hold onto. "I kept going with volleyball, it was the only thing I was good at, I died my hair black for you." His eyes go wide, and he starts to circle me as much as he could "Do you like it, do you? Do you? Do you?" I can't help it and take my good hand and tapped him on the head, forcefully and sigh.

"You need to get back to practice Bakatarou and actually practice with your team, yer." His face fell and I giggled but I stopped abruptly as his face lit up like he had a great idea. He gripped my hand and pulled me back to the gym, "You can watch us train and help me afterwards as repayment. Yup yup" I just rolled my eyes and went along with it.

His practice was amazing, he had really grown into his own over the years. Now he has a team to help him and friends that can pull him along like never before, despite what he thinks he has never been alone at least not during high school. I could tell all this just from the first 20 minutes. He may have missed me, mourned me but he was not alone. I can't help but sit and smile as I sit back and watch.

"Thank you." I look over to see Akaashi, towel around his neck and water bottle in hand. "whatever you said to him outside well he's better than I've seen him play in a while." I shake my head with a fond smile.

"I should be thanking you guys really, the way you pull him along. It's great to see." I smile up at him, but we don't get to continue.

"TALA DID YOU SEE THAT AWESOME SERVE? DID YOU? DID YOU?" Bokuto comes bouncing up to us and we turn to face him at the same time. "hmm sorry Bakatarou what's up?" he almost immediately drooped, arms down face blanked in utter devastation moping he goes back to training. I giggled; my boy was still so cute. It's good to see he hasn't changed to much. All through training Bokuto would keep looking over with big wide excited eyes, like an excited kid showing you their favourite toy for the first time. It didn't take long for the managers and coaches to notice especially when his mood went up and down. It almost became a game; he would spike and look over at me to see my reaction. I would either be talking to someone, watching intently or chatting with Akaashi between his drills. There was the fact that I was always watching, even if he didn't know it. Bokuto is still serving and everyone else has finished or given up. He keeps flicking his eyes in my direction. "Hey Akashi watch this." I grab his shoulder and spin us, so he has a better view of Bokuto then me. We watch as he goes to serve and just as he does, I turn to Akaashi and giggled when I heard Bokuto yell. "EEEHHHH"

You could hear the pin drop as everyone watched Bokuto go from happy excited to sad owl in 0.1 seconds. Akaashi looks from me to the boy practically screaming sad owl noises as Bokuto drags himself towards us.

"Why are you spending all the time with Akaashi?," he looks right at me big sad eyes "You are my friend."

I walk over to him and pat his head and run my hand through his hair. "You are still the best friend I have Bokuto, I just want to get to know your friends." My hand falls to my side, my voice goes quiet and my eyes water, "they mean so much to you, won't you let me know your friends." I add a sniffle for good measure and drop my head.

"NO NO DON'T CRY AKAASHI DO SOMETHING?" Bokuto starts to panic.

"She just wants to know your team Bokuto." Akaashi explains calmly.

Bokuto turns back to me to see my shoulders are now shaking, look up just enough to see his face and I can't hold it anymore and a giggle just explodes from my mouth and gradually get louder. I hold on to Akaashi to stop myself from falling over.

By the time I got home that afternoon the sun had long set and I was tired, all I wanted to do was go to sleep but it couldn't turn off my brain though this time it had nothing to do with the pain from my injuries. I couldn't stop thinking about what Kenma had said, I can't lose you again, I was sure that I hadn't left enough clues for him to figure it out. I just couldn't understand it and if he knew, did he tell Kuroo or keep it to himself. Thoughts and theories running ramped in my brain.

PING

Hmmm? What was that? I pick up my phone to find a message notification, shit it is from APNeko, god I never got back to him.

R U OK? – APNeko

God he must be worried, shit, I rub my hand down my face. He doesn't get emotional about a lot of things, but close friends are people he treasures like his games.

I am good, had a scuffle with a few old classmates that got a bit out of hand, been sleeping off the meds. – Toshawi

That's not okay. – APNeko

I am fine. – Toshawi

I have a question though; you can't lose me again? You lost me? – Toshawi

I held my breath and looked at my phone, waiting to see his reply, I needed to know. I wait five minutes, 10 minutes but I couldn't sit and wait any longer, I needed to do something to keep my mind off what he could be saying. I got up and got ready for a shower just as I hear a notification, I froze and stared at my phone like it was going to bite me. I stalled for a bit, I could go for a shower and answer afterwards or….no I'll probably want to drown myself afterwards. I walk over and pick up my phone, unlock it and there is the chat, and the one word that I was hoping not to see.

Tala you can't leave me again. – APNeko

How? – Toshawi

I couldn't type anything else; I was frozen stiff. He wasn't supposed to know, how did I screw up. Kuroo must hate me now oh god because Kenma would never had kept this from him.

You actually called me Kenma a few times and you shouldn't have known; you knew things you shouldn't have about me and your typing style was to similar. – APNeko

Does Kuroo know? – Toshawi I needed to know

Yes – APNeko. One simple word and my world crashed.

He must hate me. – Toshawi

He's angry but he doesn't hate you. – APNeko

I never saw the last message. I didn't know what to say after that, I needed to think, I needed to drown so that's what I did. I left my phone on the charger and got into the shower, hot water flowing over my head, pelting down on my back and shoulder, relieving some strain from my muscles. I don't know how long I was in there for, but the water ran stone cold before I forced myself out of the shower and into bed.