A/N: It's been a month. I'm aware. It's been a really hectic month, and I'm sorry I didn't have the chance to update this sooner. Enjoy.
Yang's on her way to her first class when the hallway is blocked by a throng of students around the bulletin board. They're exclaiming and laughing over something, and Yang pushes her way into the crowd to see, ignoring the gossip around her.
Well, apparently some smartass put up a poster dramatically claiming that she and Weiss are very much not dating. And, of course, Yang can't even go get in a fight with whoever did this since all they actually said that Yang and Weiss weren't dating, even though everyone at Beacon can read straight through that to what they're trying to say.
"She doth protest too much," someone cackles next to her ear, and Yang reaches out to rip the poster down. The least she can do is stop the rumor from spreading.
It doesn't work. There are posters all over the school, and the "news" spreads like wildfire. Yang could swear that she sees Jaune keel over on the floor at one point, and Pyrrha help him up while trying not to laugh. Well, if this whole debacle helps Jaune get over Weiss, then in the end they've done some good.
Team JNPR's problems are the least of Yang's worries, when her own team is a shambles. She's still not talking to Weiss because they're in a fight, Blake's still not talking to either of them, and using Ruby to send messages back and forth is never going to work. Yang needs to actually talk to someone. It's been less than forty-eight hours since her fight with Weiss, so a conversation at this point is just going to go back into an argument. So it's settled. She needs to talk to Blake now.
That doesn't happen, because Weiss drags her into a supply closet and starts frantically explaining at her.
"Why does everyone think we're dating just because of those posters?" she wails, then switches modes. "We need to prioritize damage control. Ruthlessly shut down the rumor and eliminate those who are spreading it."
"We already look suspicious," Yang points out. They are jammed into a supply closet, and at least ten people saw Weiss drag Yang into it, so, ya know, so much for discretion. "Trying to suppress the rumor now is just going to make it look like we're hiding something."
"What about putting up posters all over the school saying that we aren't dating is suspicious? That's the complete opposite of suspicious!"
Yang sighs.
"Okay, you know what, I'm just going to pretend you didn't say that. We need to convince people that we aren't dating, and I think I know how."
…
Weiss flounces into the hallway, every inch the jilted lover, and Yang is starting to regret the idea. Weiss is clearly way too into this.
"You monster!" she screams, once there are enough people around to hear the argument. "You cheated on me!"
"Uh, no, I swear I didn't," Yang offers. She's never been a great actress, but Weiss is enough of a drama queen that nobody's even looking at Yang, so it's fine.
"I found Blake's shirt in your bed!" Weiss screams, then flings a shirt at Yang. It's actually Blake's shirt, which is a little worrying. "And Pyrrha's!"
Yang lets Weiss scream and rant and throw stuff at her, since most of it misses, occasionally throwing in an "it's not what it looks like!" and wondering how Weiss managed to steal so many people's clothes in such a short time. Making it look like she cheated on Weiss with half the girls at Beacon might be a little extreme, in retrospect; Yang wanted a dramatic fight and a breakup, not whatever this is.
Once Yang is knee-deep in clothes Weiss puts all her energy into one final incoherent tirade, before storming off. They meet again in their dorm room about ten minutes later.
"Well, I think that was a stunningly well-done faked breakup," Weiss says, as close to cheerful as she ever really gets.
"Well, you got the drama level right, but making me seem like a heartless player might have been a little extreme," Yang says, then backtracks. "I appreciate the help, obviously, and your acting was great, but still."
"This was a complete success, and all our problems are solved!" Weiss says cheerfully, and Yang chooses not to burst her bubble.
"Do me a favor and don't tell Ruby about any of this, please. I don't want to have that conversation with her."
…
Blake has entered the little-known sixth stage of grief, the "rom-com rejection" phase, in which she eats chocolate with her hair up in a bun and cries over romance movies. She can't actually eat chocolate because the theobromine is highly toxic to cats, but she's done her best with the Faunus-friendly substitutes available.
"He doesn't love you. He's lying!" Blake shouts at her scroll, then bursts into a fresh round of tears. Gone are the wrenching sobs or quiet dramatic weeping of earlier, and now it just feels like she has to cry to get it out of her system.
The movie continues on, regardless of Blake's outbursts. The love interest takes off her glasses and a dramatic musical sting accompanies the revelation that she is, in fact, incredibly attractive and not just incredibly attractive but also with bad vision. And that's all it takes. The hero realizes he's been in love with her all along and sweeps her off her feet and they have a happy ending.
"That's it!" Blake says aloud, just in case there's an audience who needs obvious clues. A makeover. Clearly the solution.
Blake has perfect vision, so the glasses thing isn't an option. Time for Plan B.
With ceremonious care, Blake unsheathes Gambol Shroud and puts it to her neck. She painstakingly shortens a single strand of hair.
With a new look that stunning, how can Yang not fall at her feet?