Chapter Five
When the sun had left and the winter came
And the sky fall could only bring the rain
I sat in darkness, all broken hearted
I couldn't find a day I didn't feel alone
I never meant to cry, started losing hope
But somehow baby, you broke through and saved me
You're an angel, tell me you're never leaving
Bella POV
I sat in the recliner, only half watching the episode of The Office Jasper had flipped on. We had just ordered food from a diner and were waiting until we could pick it up. I was nervous knowing we would never get our food before Edward got here.
I'd met Edward at school. Jasper and I had music with him and he occasionally had lunch with us. He was nice enough, a bit stuck up. He didn't seem to pay much attention to me, for which I was thankful. I did feel self-conscious around him though. I usually saw him eyeing girls like Alice, Jess, Lauren, and their friends. The gorgeous, thin, naturally beautiful types. Not that I wanted the attention, but it always just reminded me that I'm not even close to their level. And now I'd have to eat in front of him.
I was thankful I'd only ordered a salad. Jasper seemed a bit unhappy about that but let it go fairly quickly. I could hear footsteps upstairs and glanced nervously to Emmett. I'm not sure why my eyes always gravitated to him for comfort, but they did. He looked to me and gave me a comforting smile. I still felt like I needed a bit of space but was feeling calmer and more collected than I did twenty minutes ago. Remembering the last time I'd eaten pizza...I got a little spooked. It was a memory I didn't want to relive.
I heard footsteps coming down the stairs and looked up to see Edward grinning, looking around the room.
"Hey guys!" he greeted and everyone said their hellos. I nodded to him and saw him give Alice a quick once over. I noticed Emmett and Jasper both give him disgruntled looks and he smiled, clapping Jasper on the shoulder.
"What's the plan for tonight?" he asked and Jasper shrugged.
"Easy night in. Maybe some video games." He told him and Edward groaned.
"Oh, come on! It's a Saturday night! Let's have some real fun." He insisted and Jasper chuckled.
"What's real fun?" Edward grinned.
"Well, if we have to stay in, we at least have to crack the bottle of tequila in my bag." He said with a wink to Alice, who Jasper then turned to. He grabbed her hand in an obvious way and nodded.
"What do you say, babe?" he asked and I bit back a smile at Jasper marking his territory. Emmett was still glaring at Edward and Alice giggled.
"I'm down!" she said and Jasper nodded.
"Alright. Might spice up a few rounds of Guitar Hero. What do you say, Bella?" he asked and I laughed.
"I mean…I'll play Guitar Hero." I said and noticed Edward turn to me. He gave me a quick once over and shifted his body language. Apparently with Alice unavailable, I would do.
"Ah come on. I'm sure you can throw shots back like a champ." He told me with a smile and I scoffed.
"I don't think so." He chuckled.
"We'll see where the night takes us." He insisted and I fought the urge to roll my eyes. I noticed Jasper caught up in Alice and realized he wouldn't be as helpful tonight as I'd hoped. Not that I minded...I didn't need him to babysit me every second. But I wasn't very fond of the way Edward was sizing me up.
"Let's go get the food, Bella." Emmett told me sternly. I looked up to see his eyes narrowed at Edward and felt relief flood my body. I'd forgotten about Emmett. I could tell from the look on his face that he wasn't about to take Edward's crap tonight.
"Oh, I'm parked behind you." Edward told him and Emmett shrugged.
"You can move."
"I can always escort Bella to pick up the food." He told me with a wink and Emmett stood, reaching out a hand to me. I slowly took it and he pulled me up.
"We're good." Emmett insisted and I stood close to him, feeling nervous. Under normal circumstances, I get that Edward's just assessing his prospects for the night. He was clearly a player and didn't feel the need to hide it. But given my past and the fact that Aaron was sexually abusing me on an almost weekly basis...I was terrified to receive this kind of attention. I knew Emmett had no intention of being with me in that way, which made him such a safe option. Edward sighed and nodded, tossing me a smile as he led the way upstairs. I followed Emmett upstairs and into the foyer.
"Where did you guys order from?" Edward asked and Emmett glanced to him, handing me my coat.
"Carver Cafe." Emmett told him and he nodded. He reached into his pocket and handed him a twenty.
"I'll call in a burger and fries, pick it up for me?" He asked and Emmett nodded, taking the cash.
"Yeah, no problem."
I zipped my coat up and tossed my boots on, letting Emmett lead me out the door and into the cold. Of course, at 5pm in March, it was slowly getting dark and was freezing. I took Emmett's arm as he led me down the icy path to his Jeep. Edward carefully jogged to his car as Emmett opened my door for me.
"Thanks." I told him and he nodded to me, his face expressionless. I started to feel a bit nervous, seeing his carefree attitude wasn't returning. He closed my door and went around to his side. Edward pulled out for us and we set off down the road to the diner.
"You...uh...you ok?" I asked nervously after about two minutes of silence. He didn't react right away and I looked to my hands. That feeling was starting to build in my chest...that feeling when I knew Aaron was mad at me and I was in trouble. Emmett stayed quiet and I could feel tears welling in my eyes. I hated this feeling. I knew Emmett wasn't Aaron...but I also could see he was angry. I had thought he was being protective...but now that he wasn't speaking to me I couldn't shake the feeling that I'd done something wrong. After another minute he cleared his throat.
"Yup." He mumbled gruffly and I felt myself flinch at the sound. I saw his grip tighten on the steering wheel and pressed myself into the door, staring out the window. I tried to regulate my breathing but I was very aware of the fact that I was alone with a guy I barely knew, who looked just like my abusive ex-boyfriend. And he was clearly angry with me. We drove the rest of the way to the diner in silence and I did everything I could not to let the tears fall from my eyes, remembering all the times Aaron would smack me in the car.
Emmett POV
I gripped my steering wheel as tight as I could, trying to control my emotions. Edward never ceased to get under my skin. Not only did he ogle my sister like she was a piece of meat, but then he had the nerve to hit on Bella. The guy had no filter and I wanted to smack him for it. Watching Jasper step in and "make a claim" on Alice was fine by me. He clearly wanted Edward to see he should back off. But when he then turned to Bella and I saw how uncomfortable she was...I almost snapped. I knew I couldn't lose my temper around her though. The last thing she needed was to see me angry, given the situation. Even now I was struggling not to be pissed and I didn't want to chance unloading that energy on her. Id told myself I wouldn't get angry around her and I intended to follow through. I knew if I could just take a few minutes of silence that the anger would wear off. I glanced to Bella and saw her looking out the window and took the time to decompress.
About five minutes later, we pulled into the lot of the diner. I sighed, shutting off the engine and turned to her.
"You want to come in?" I asked and noticed she flinched. I must have startled her.
"No, thank you." She told me quietly and I eyed her for a moment. She wouldn't look at me and I felt my temper flare again. Edward must have really gotten to her. I sighed and nodded.
"Ok, I'll be right back." I told her quickly, not wanting to sound angry. I got out and went into the diner. I pulled out my phone and saw I had a text from Jasper.
'Keep him away from Bella tonight.'My jaw stiffened.
'Already planning on it.'I replied, knowing I'd be skipping the alcohol tonight. I didn't want to get distracted and let Bella out of my sight. I know Edward would never force himself on anyone. But he was persistent and I don't know if Bella had the guts to not cave in. I wasn't about to put her in that situation. I glanced out the window to see Bella hadn't moved from her position, staring out her window. I watched her for a few moments, seeing her statue-like stillness. I furrowed my brow with concern. She didn't seem like she was ok. My attention was pulled to the counter as Jasper's name was called. I walked up and handed the waitress my debit.
"There's an order for Edward Masen as well." I told her and she nodded, grabbing his bag too. I paid for both orders and thanked her, heading back to the Jeep. I put the food in the back and climbed back into the driver's seat. Bella still didn't move.
"Are you ok?" I asked and noticed she was shaking slightly. She barely nodded.
"Yes." She whispered and I felt my chest tighten. I reached over and pulled gently on her arm. She whimpered at the contact and I felt shock on my face.
"Hey...hey what's wrong?" I asked and leaned over. She leaned closer to her door but I could see tears streaming down her face.
"Oh my God... what...what happened?" I asked, anxiety spiking. She tried to pull away from me again and I grabbed her hand and tried to get her to face me. "Bella, look at me." I insisted and her eyes darted to me quickly. I could see fear clear on her face and my chest ached.
"If this is about what Edward said, I'll kill him." I told her quietly and she shook her head.
"No...no I'm fine. It's fine. I'm sorry." I felt her pulling on her hand and held it tighter.
"Bella, why are you pulling away? What's going on?" I asked concerned. She was clearly not ok.
"I'm sorry." She whispered again, her eyes wide and nervous, tears leaking down her cheeks.
"Why are you sorry?" I asked, feeling slightly panicked. I didn't know her well enough to know how to troubleshoot this. All I could do was give it my best guess. She didn't answer and tried to pull her hand back to her body. "Bella, I'm not letting go. I'm sorry but I can't let you pull away from me right now. I need to make sure you're ok." I insisted and she looked down to our hands and I felt pain in my chest.
"Are...are you afraid right now?" I asked softly and she closed her eyes, trying to take a deep breath. I dropped her hand as if it burned me, suddenly realizing I was the problem.
"Oh my God... Bella I'm so sorry. What did I do? I didn't mean to scare you..." I wanted to scoop her into my arms and make it better but I knew I needed to play this slow. She shook her head and I felt my voice catch in my throat.
"B-Bella please. I'm freaking out here a bit. What did I do? Why are you so afraid?" I begged and she took a staggered breath.
"What did I do?" she asked in a small voice and I felt confused.
"What do you mean?" I asked and she shook her head. I noticed her scratching at the back of one of her hands and wanted to stop her but I couldn't touch her just yet.
"You...you..." she trailed off. I eyed her hands again, seeing it slowly getting red. "You're angry." She whispered and I felt intense guilt flood me.
"Bella, I'm so sorry I couldn't reel it in." I told her and she scratched harder on her hand. I finally couldn't take it any longer and grabbed her hands in mine. She gasped but I held on.
"Hey, no." I whispered and rubbed her hand with my thumb. It was raw and hot to the touch.
"What did I do?" she asked again, her voice shaky. I felt confused again for a moment until I realized what she meant.
"Oh...oh Bella no. I'm not angry with you." I told her softly and saw her start crying harder.
"Oh my God, Bella no." I didn't care at this point and reached over, pulling her into my arms. She stiffened nervously but I held her close.
"Bella, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm not mad at you. Jesus Christ I am so sorry." I told her quietly. Her body was tense and I reached down and unclipped her belt. I pulled her closer and began rubbing my hand up and down her back, smoothing her hair.
"I would never hurt you." I whispered and felt her melt into me. She shook a bit as she cried but she was finally letting me comfort her. I gave her a minute before pulling back. She was calm now, her eyes red and puffy. I put my hands on either side of her face and brushed some hair off her forehead.
"Why would you think I was mad at you?" I asked, not caring how forward I was being. I needed to fix this. It didn't matter how I fixed it or how unlike me this behaviour was. I upset her, and it was my job to make it better.
"You...you wouldn't...look at me. You wouldn't...speak to me. You..." but she trailed off, another tear falling down her face. I wiped it away with my thumb and shook my head.
"Fuck..." I whispered, realizing how my behaviour had seemed. "Bella...I'm mad at Edward. I just didn't want to vent to you and scare you...so I figured not saying anything was better." She searched my eyes for a moment before letting out a deep exhale and nodding.
"You're not mad at me?" She confirmed and I shook my head desperately.
"Not a chance." I insisted and she visibly relaxed. I let out an audible breath and shook my head.
"Bella, the thought of you sitting here afraid of me...it makes me want to be sick. I could never hurt you." I told her and she closed her eyes.
"I'm sorry." She whispered and I shook my head.
"No, I'm sorry. I'm such an idiot." I said quietly and she shook her head.
"You're not an idiot." She insisted and I sighed, pulling her back into me tightly. This time she didn't flinch or pull away and I knew this time I was lucky. I couldn't ever let this happen again.
After about a minute I pulled away, holding her hands. I looked down to see her hand still red and felt my chest tighten again.
"Tonight, I'm not drinking either. I'm going to stick it out with you, you can crash with me if you'd like, to avoid Edward. And we are going to discuss this." I told her sternly, looking down to her hand. She glanced down and sighed, nodding reluctantly.
"Um...crash with you?" she asked in a small voice.
"Purely innocent, I promise. I just don't want a drunk Edward to stumble into your room and give you a hard time." I saw a moment of panic flash across her face and she nodded quickly.
"Don't leave me alone." She insisted and I nodded, slightly surprised by her desperation. I couldn't shake the feeling that there was something she wasn't telling me. I knew I had to be patient though, pushing her wouldn't have a very positive result. I gave her hand a squeeze and nodded.
"I won't." She nodded and let out a sigh of relief. I motioned for her to buckle up and grabbed my own belt. We pulled out of the lot and headed back to Jasper's.
By the time we pulled into the driveway, Bella had composed herself. She no longer looked like she had been crying and was nice and calm.
"Are you sure you're ok?" I asked, shutting off my Jeep. She sighed, nodding.
"I'm a bit embarrassed…I feel like I'm all over the place." she said quietly and I shook my head.
"Bella, you are dealing with a lot. Sometimes that's going to come out in a very emotional way...do not be embarrassed for having strong feelings." I told her and she smiled a small, delicate smile.
"I... I hope this isn't weird but..." she took a deep breath, glancing to my hands. "I feel really comfortable with you." She told me quietly and I felt my chest swell with pride. "And...it feels really nice when you..." she trailed off again, looking down to her own hands. I watched her curiously, seeing her blush slightly.
"When I what?" I asked and she exhaled.
"It's just been a really long time since I've been...touched...so nicely." She confessed. I watched her sadly, my heart breaking for her. "And when you...touch me...I don't know." She sighed and I reached over and took her hand in mine. She smiled down to it and took another deep breath to relax herself. "It's so...warm." She whispered and I chuckled softly.
"Well, you are always cold." I joked and she laughed softly.
"This is true." She nodded and I smiled.
"Bella...that's not weird. I feel a connection to you. I have a lot of friends but...I also don't. And at the risk of sounded totally lame... it feels like we were meant to be friends. I'm not a touchy feely person but it feels good knowing you're happy. I feel very protective of you. So... I hope you're ok with the fact that sometimes I'm a little forward. I just want to take you in a hug and shield you from everything." I confessed and she smiled up to me.
"I feel like that should send me running...but I also know that what you're saying is completely innocent and it sounds...amazing." I chuckled and nodded.
"I promise I wont put the moves on you." I joked and I saw her falter for a moment before smiling.
"Never questioned it." She said quietly and looked to the house. "We should get inside...they're probably getting hangry." I chuckled and nodded. I grabbed the food from the back and walked up to the door with Bella.
"Thank God. What took so long?!" Alice asked, clearly getting hangry as Bella had predicted. I chuckled, feeling happy. It was nice seeing my twin intensely want her food. I shrugged.
"Blame Eddie. We waited on his order." I lied and saw Bella smile slightly. Of course I'd cover for her. I also didn't want to admit to Jasper that I'd made his cousin so upset.
We went to the kitchen and divvied up the food. I glanced to Bella who looked a bit nervous, eyeing everyone else while she held her salad container in her hands. I saw the others heading for the basement and cleared my throat.
"We'll be down in a bit." I told them and Jasper nodded in understanding. I waited for them to disappear and turned to Bella.
"Want to eat up here?" I asked and she smiled in relief, nodding.
"Oh dear God, yes." I smiled back and motioned to the table. We sat and opened our containers. I'd gotten a double stacked bacon burger with fries and she got a garden salad with french dressing.
"Ew...french?" I asked and she nodded.
"Yes? Because french is the best dressing." She told me with confidence and I scoffed.
"Lies. Clearly ranch is superior." She shook her head.
"Ranch is overrated." I fake gasped and she giggled a bit, taking a bite of cucumber.
"Ok, first off, take the back. Second, french dressing is the ugly stepsister of dressings."
"How dare you." She snapped and I grinned. I was slowly discovering my new favourite past time – bickering with Bella.
"How dare I? You called ranch dressing overrated. Who do you think you are?" I asked and she shrugged.
"Clearly someone of higher intelligence and superior taste." She quipped and my mouth hung open.
"Wow. So that's how it's going to be." She nodded.
"I mean, you gave me no choice." I watched her for a moment before throwing a fry into her salad and she threw her head back, laughing loudly. She snagged the fry and tossed it into her mouth. My face turned into disgust.
"Ew! That had dressing on it!" I complained and she shrugged.
"Oh no... you should throw another to really teach me a lesson." She deadpanned and I laughed, throwing another. She snatched it up too and shrugged.
"Keep throwing food. I can do this all night." She told me and I grinned.
"How did Jasper hide such a cool chick from us for all these years?" I asked and she nodded.
"You weren't ready." She said seriously and I chuckled.
"Oh, and I am now?" I asked and she shrugged.
"Well you're never really ready." She explained and I nodded.
"Clearly." I watched her for a moment before getting curious. "Why did you stop coming around anyway?" I asked and she sighed.
"Aaron was jealous." She mumbled and I gave her a confused look.
"Of you visiting your cousin?" I asked and she shook her head laughing.
"No. He didn't like Jacob." She told me and I felt my brown furrow in confusion. After a few seconds it clicked.
"Oh Jacob Black. You know him?" I asked, surprised. She nodded.
"Yeah we go way back. Super close my whole life pretty much." She explained and I felt a bit... unsettled? Not that Jake wasn't a nice guy but sometimes he just rubbed me the wrong way.
"Oh?" I asked and she nodded again.
"Yeah. Aaron saw a picture of Jake and I in my room and pretty much put an end to my Forks visits after that." I shook my head.
"Seriously? After seeing a picture? That's an overreaction. Was he proposing in this picture?" I asked and she laughed, shaking her head.
"May as well have been." We were quiet for a minute before she spoke again, swallowing another forkful of salad. "I miss him. I should text him." She commented and I nodded slowly, hating that idea.
'You're just being protective.'I told myself, remembering all the times it'd caught him checking out Alice. There was just something about him I didn't trust. I looked up from my burger, hearing her phone vibrate on the table. She glanced to it and smiled, picking it up. She typed out a message and put it down, taking another bite of salad. I found myself wondering who it was…if it was Jake or someone else. She smiled again at her phone and I felt a weird feeling I'd never felt before. It was like…anxiety trapped in my chest. She typed out a message and stuck it in her sweater pocket, turning back to me, giving me a smile.
"Sorry about that, that was rude." She told me and I shook my head.
"No, that's ok. Friend?" I asked and was surprised by my nosiness. Since when did I care who she spoke to? She smiled.
"Yeah…yeah you could say that." She said happily and I nodded. She looked down to her salad and sighed.
"I'm stuffed." She told me and I nodded, popping my last bite of burger into my mouth. I grabbed her container and put it in the fridge in case she wanted the rest later. I tossed mine in the garbage and turned to see her standing right behind me. She eyed me for a second before slowly pressing herself against my chest and wrapping her arms around me, giving me a tight hug. I felt warmth melt away any anxiety I had and smiled softly at the sight of her tiny frame pressed against me and wrapped my arms around her too. We stood there for a moment before I spoke, my cheek resting on her head.
"What's this for?" I asked softly and felt her shrug.
"I just needed a hug. And I wanted to thank you." She explained and I smiled into her hair.
"Thank me?" I asked and she nodded.
"I'm so lucky to have you. You make me feel better." She said quietly. I held her a bit tighter. "I eat more when I'm with you…I feel more myself than I have in a while. You just…have this magical quality that puts me at ease." I rubbed my hands over her back. I didn't know what to say. I'd never had anyone but Alice make me feel so…needed. Most girls at school wanted to take the pathological commitment phobe and turn him into boyfriend material. People like Jess just gluing themselves to me for sex and the prospect of being the one to finally nail me down.
But here was Bella, a girl I'd known two weeks, wanting a true closeness and friendship. She didn't want me around because I was popular or on the football team. She didn't want to get me into bed or change me. She just…wanted to be near me. It felt really good to not just feel like the good looking dummy for once. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, wanting to cherish this feeling. It's not often I actually felt…special. There were a million things I found myself wanting to say back but every word caught in my throat.
She pulled back and looked up to me, gratitude written all over her face.
"I hope that's ok." She confirmed and all I could do was nod. I pulled her back in and gave her one last hug, now realizing how much I needed someone like Bella in my life. I thought my motive was only to help her and heal her. Wanting to help Jasper and also make sure she never felt like Alice felt again. But now I see what really pulled me to her.
She didn't see me and hit on me. She didn't see the way girls wanted me and throw herself into the mix. She didn't get possessive or flirty. She just saw a guy. She didn't treat me like I was stupid or easily controlled and she made me earn a spot in her life. This friendship felt real…and it was addictive.
"It's more than ok." I whispered and she squeezed my middle tightly and pulled away.
"I guess we should get downstairs…" she said hesitantly and I could see she was already missing the contact. I remembered her words earlier…that she hadn't been touched like this in a long time. I smiled and grabbed her hand and motioned for her to follow. She did and we went downstairs together, finding the others had finished too and were setting up Guitar Hero.
"Finally. Thought maybe you two had gotten…distracted." Alice said, trailing off when she saw me holding Bella's hand. I found myself not caring, knowing it wasn't romantic and didn't need to be explained or defended. I saw Jasper give me a look but I just smiled to Bella and pulled her to the couch and we sat down together.
"You like music, right?" Edward asked her and I watched her nod.
"You could say that." She told him and he nodded.
"You're pretty quiet in class." He told her and she shrugged.
"Yeah…" she trailed off and he smiled.
"I applied to Julliard, I could give you some tips if you want." He told her and I heard Jasper laugh. Bella smiled and thanked him.
"You…give Bella tips?" Jasper asked, looking amused and Edward shrugged.
"Yeah, I'd do that for you." He told Bella with a wink and she laughed.
"That's very kind of you." She said and Jasper laughed again, shaking his head. He seemed to find something about it way more amusing than the rest of us did.
"What instrument do you want, Bella?" Jasper asked and she shrugged.
"I can sit out first." She told us and Alice shook her head.
"No, I'm not playing." She told Bella who nodded, looking back to Jasper.
"Then I'll just take whatever's left." She said and Edward stood up and grabbed the microphone. He grabbed the bass and handed it to Bella.
"Here, this will be easiest." I saw surprise flash over her face and she smiled.
"Gee, thanks." She told him and Jasper laughed again. She stood and tossed the strap on and I snagged the drums, leaving Jasper with the lead guitar. Jasper set the difficulty to expert and Edward chuckled.
"Man take it easy on her." He told Jasper who shrugged.
"I'm sure she will be fine." We started with Hotel California and I could see why Jasper had laughed at Edward. Bella had clearly played before. We got to the end and Jasper turned to Bella.
"What song next?" he asked and she started looking at the list, when Jasper handed her the guitar.
"Here, you pick, I'm going to get a drink." She nodded, swapping the bass for the guitar, flipping through the list.
"Hey Em, how's your drum skills." She asked and I shrugged.
"Nothing to brag about." I said with a laugh and she smiled.
"Want to trade?" she asked and I nodded, getting up and grabbing the bass. Edward laughed as she queued up Everlong by Foo Fighters and sat at the drums.
"Bella. That's going to be ridiculously difficult." He warned her with a smile and she eyed him for a moment. Jasper came over and excitedly grabbed the guitar, putting down a beer he'd taken from the fridge. He looked to Bella amused and she sighed.
"Tell you what. I'll take a shot for every note I miss." She wagered and I felt nervous.
"Bella…is that a good idea? The song is really tough." I cautioned, not wanting her to get sick. Jasper was absolutely giddy though, watching the exchange between Edward and Bella.
"How about, if you miss more than five notes, you take two shots…and you go out with me next Saturday." He said, staring at Bella. Her eyes narrowed slightly but she nodded.
"And if I miss none, you never ask me out again." She added and he nodded with a grin.
"Deal." I glanced between them, feeling uneasy. I don't think Bella knew what she was getting herself into...and the thought of Edward taking her out made me really uncomfortable. I was a bit surprised she would gamble that...
Jasper grinned to me and took a swig of his beer before nodding to Bella.
"Alright then. High, high stakes here. Let's go cousin."
Jasper started the song and I felt like I blacked out. I missed half my notes watching Bella. She was unreal. I looked to Jasper in shock but he was also laser focused. Edward watched her for a moment looking nervous, but eventually got the vocals in.
Four minutes later and Bella stood up, shaking out her hands. Jasper turned and high-fived her, grinning like a crazy person. I just stood there staring at her, mouth open. Edward desperately looked to the screen to see her stats and there it sat.
One lonely note was missed.
"Ooo...not your best." Jasper told her, clicking his tongue and she shrugged.
"But works just the same." She told him and Alice slapped the couch from where she sat.
"What?!" she shrieked and I looked to Edward who glanced to Bella confused.
"Hey Julliard. Um...if you want? I can maybe give you some tips?" she asked him and he nodded, tasting his own medicine. After a moment he chuckled and looked to her.
"So I take it you don't just 'like' music." He stated and she shrugged.
"What makes you say that?" She asked and he smiled to her, a sort of...admiration on his face.
"Just a hunch." He said and she smiled.
"You're probably right." She said and stretched her hands and turned to me. I knew my face was still pure shock and she smiled, walking over to grab her water.
"So, jumping back on the drums, cousin?" Jasper asked and she laughed.
"Uh, no. Trade me." She told him and he nodded, taking the guitar off and passing it to her. Edward motioned he wanted to trade too and I handed him the bass.
"But don't forget, Miss Swan. I can still ask you out." Edward reminded her and she shrugged.
"I mean, you can try." She said with a laugh and he grinned, nodding. He sighed and seemed to look at her with more respect than before. Bella scrolled through the list and turned to me.
"What song?" She asked and I tried to find one I could actually sing. I enjoyed playing and respected that we played expert because I always played with musically gifted people. However, I had zero musical talent. I could fumble through easy notes when I was singing, so I didn't want anything too crazy vocally.
"Do The Middle." I told her, pointing to the screen and she nodded, selecting it. We started playing and I was glad I got to sing, which was rare. I actually got to watch Bella and still participate. She was incredible...she might even be better than Jasper. And he was near perfect at this game. I could hear her humming to the song as well and smiled. She seemed to radiate more confidence than before. Even joking around with Edward and holding her own. It was like she was a different person.
We kept this up for a few more songs before Bella turned to Jasper. She looked drained.
"I think I'm done. Alice? You sure you don't want to play?" she asked and Alice shook her head.
"No I make it a rule not to play games with Edward." She joked and Bella laughed, looking to Edward.
"Oh it isn't so bad, you just have to put him in his place." She teased and Edward chuckled, nodding.
"That you did." I was surprised at how nice Edward was being now. Bella must have really embarrassed him. I got up from the drums and walked to Bella.
"Want to come up and get some snacks?" I asked her and she nodded. I turned to Alice.
"Queue up a movie or new game or something and we will be back." She nodded and I put my hand on the small of Bella's back, motioning for her to head to the stairs. We went up to the kitchen and over to where Alice and Jasper had stored the brownies and cookies. Bella went to grab bags of chips. I turned to her and cleared my throat.
"So...uh...were you really willing to risk going on a date with him?" I asked, not able to help myself. She looked to me surprised before she laughed.
"God no." She told me and I gave her a confused look. She softened and shook her head.
"Emmett I can play that song in my sleep. Which...I basically did one summer because Jasper insisted we play til 4am. I knew I would never miss 5 notes. I've played guitar and drums for that song a million times." I nodded, still feeling off. She gave me a small smile and walked over to me.
"What is it?" she asked and I shrugged.
"I don't know...I feel protective of you. I don't like the way he looks at you." I told her honestly and she took my hand and gave it a squeeze. I didn't know where this side of me was coming from but I didn't like it.
"Hey...I would never have bet with him if I wasn't 100% sure I could handle it. There was no scenario there when I'd have missed five. You don't need to worry, ok?" She told me and I exhaled, nodding. I gave her a smile.
"Yeah...where the hell did that come from? You schooled him." I told her and she laughed.
"Yeah, apparently Mr. Julliard cant teach me much." She said, rolling her eyes and I nodded.
"So that's why Jasper found it so amusing." I remembered and she nodded. "So...are you like...just good at Guitar Hero? Or are you some beautiful mind or something?" I asked and she laughed, shrugging and walking back to the chips.
"Or something." She said and I let it go. We grabbed the snacks and made our way back downstairs. Edward was sitting on the chair and Jasper and Alice had taken up space on the couch. They had cards out on the coffee table and music was playing on the speaker.
"Let's play Kings!" Alice said excitedly, sipping her drink. I glanced to Bella who sighed, walking around the table.
"I'll play if I can play with water." She told them and this time, no one complained.
"Yeah no problem." Alice told her and I grabbed a pop out of the mini fridge, pouring it in a cup. They didn't need to know it wasn't alcoholic. Even though Edward had backed off a bit didn't change the fact that he'd shown clear interest in Bella tonight and I'd promised her I wouldn't drink. I walked over to find Bella sitting on the floor on the opposite side of the coffee table and I dropped down beside her. Alice started writing out the rules and I felt Bella leaning into me.
"You can drink if you want." She whispered and I shrugged.
"I'm good." I told her and she smiled. We played for a while, laughing and listening to music before I noticed Bella starting to yawn. We had teamed up on the others quite a bit so they were already drunk.
"Well, I think I'm done for tonight." I told them and heard them groan.
"What! We aren't done!" Alice scolded and I laughed.
"Yes we are. Don't you remember? Eddie drew the last King." I told her and they looked confused. Jasper snickered, knowing I was lying. Edward sighed dramatically.
"Aww, fuck." He groaned, grabbing the cup and drinking it down. Bella laughed and shook her head at me.
"I think I'm done too." She said and Jasper nodded, looking to me. I helped Bella up and Jasper came over to me.
"Hey uh..." He started but I shook my head.
"She's coming up with me. I haven't been drinking." I told him and he nodded, smiling.
"Behave." He told me with a pointed look and gave Bella a hug. I sighed but nodded, taking Bella's hand.
"Bella! Hey where...where are you going. We have...we have so much to talk about." Edward told her, grabbing her arm. I saw her tense and spin around, her backing forcefully against my chest.
"I'm going to bed." She said firmly and he smirked.
"Oh cool, cool. I can show you where the rooms are." He told her with a wink and she shook her head, digging her nails into my arm. I wrapped both arms around her front protectively, causing Edward's grip on her to loosen, his hand falling to his side.
"She's coming with me." I told him with a glare and he held up his hands.
"Hey man, its cool. I'm just talking to Bella here." He told me and gave her a smile but she dug her nails in harder and I stepped back with her so she was further away from him.
"She's done talking. Jasper, take care of my sister tonight? Don't drink the place dry. Goodnight." I said firmly, a pointed look at Edward and he laughed, stumbling backwards and back to his seat. I felt Bella pushing against me wanting to go, so I turned us around and followed her closely up the stairs. I went to stop her on the main floor but she took off up the next set of stairs to the second floor. She bee lined for one of the guest rooms and I followed her in quickly, closing the door behind us. She walked in, going to the window and ripping it open. I heard her gasp, sucking in as much cold air as she could. I looked down to my arm, finding her nail marks etched into my skin. I knew she was afraid of being hurt...but I wasn't expecting her to be that afraid. I waited a moment before I walked over, putting my hand gently on her shoulder. She tensed a bit but spun around and burrowed herself into my chest. I held her close and rubbed her back.
"You ok?" I asked but she was silent. I pulled back and had to put my hands on her shoulders to push her away from me enough to see her face. I looked down to find her cheeks tear streaked and her eyes fearful. I felt my face fall and took a breath, composing my thoughts.
"What aren't you telling me?" I asked and she shook her head, tears welling in her eyes. I sighed, moving to close the window, knowing she was going to get cold. She walked over to the bed, ripping her hoodie off exposing a green shirt that showed her tiny frame. She breathed deeply.
"God, it's hot in here." She muttered and I shook my head.
"It's not...can you tell me what's going on?" I asked and she ignored me, fanning herself. I went over and grabbed her hands, making her look to me.
"Hey...Bella you just need to take a minute. Sit down and I'll go get your bag." I told her and she gripped my hand aggressively, digging her nails in again.
"Don't leave me."She insisted desperately and I put both my hands on her cheeks, leaning down to look in her eyes.
"Hey...it's ok. I promise. I'm just going downstairs, no one is coming up here." She looked nervously to the door and I shook my head. "Bella, do you trust me?" I asked and she looked back to me for a moment before nodding.
"Yes." She said in a small voice and I smiled.
"See? I wouldn't let you get hurt. Just sit down, get comfortable, take a few deep breaths and relax. I'll be back in literally 30 seconds." I told her and she took a shaky breath but nodded. I smiled and straightened, heading out of the room. I jogged down the stairs, grabbing her bag from where I'd left it in the kitchen and jogged back up the stairs. Walking back into the room I found her sitting on the bed, legs crossed. She looked up to me and I saw her immediately relax.
Bella POV
He came in and smiled to me comfortingly and I fought the urge to get up and bury myself into his chest again. Something about Emmett was so soothing and safe. He walked to me and pointed to the empty space on the queen sized bed.
"Can I sit?" he asked and I smiled. This right here was why I found it so easy to trust him. He recognized my boundaries without me needing to set them. I nodded, knowing he wasn't a threat and felt the bed shift as he sat himself down beside me. We were quiet for a moment before he cleared his throat.
"So...where do you want to start?" He asked and I looked to him confused. He grabbed my hand gently and glanced to it.
"Do you want to talk about...your hand? Or What just happened." He asked and I felt immediately nervous. I'd forgotten he wanted to talk about this. I hung my head and shrugged. He sighed and started to rub my rough hand with his thumb. The redness was gone but it was dry and rough from my bad habit.
"Let's start here." He told me softly and I took a very deep breath before nodding. He took that as permission to continue. "Do you...do that often?" He asked and I took a moment before nodding. I felt him still rubbing my hand but I refused to look up. I was embarrassed that I had a moment in front of him and that he had seen that part of me. "Why?" he asked. His voice was soft, almost weak. I kept my head down and took a few breaths to muster the courage to speak.
"I...uh...I guess I started doing it as a way to kind of...cope. With Aaron...with being hungry...with my mom. With just...everything. I get this...build up of emotion. Fear...anger...insecurity. And I just need to get it out. I wasn't allowed to show those things. And I just...started releasing that energy by..." but I trailed off. He paused before speaking quietly.
"By hurting yourself?" He asked and I took a deep breath.
"Yes." I whispered and he gripped my hand tightly. I felt tears slowly slipping down my cheeks silently.
"Do you...do anything else?" he asked and I exhaled, shaking my head.
"No...I've...thought about it. But...I never had the courage. I just scratched...or wouldn't eat." I confessed. I watched him rub slow circles over the spot on my hand and found the rhythmic motion to be calming.
"How long would you go without eating?" he asked and I thought for a moment.
"Umm...I think...the longest I've gone is...probably three days." I explained and he was silent. After about a solid minute I couldn't handle the curiosity anymore and chanced a look up to him. I saw him looking at our hands, his eyes glassy. I felt shock on my face and reached up to touch his cheek.
"It's ok." I told him and he shook his head.
"It's not." He said quietly and I felt guilty. I didn't want to upset him. We were quiet for a few moments before he spoke.
"What kind of thing would make you do this?" He asked and I looked up, seeing him watching me sadly. I don't know why I was even considering telling him about my secrets...but I somehow knew I could trust him.
"This...this wont...leave this room. Right?" I asked and he nodded.
"I promise." I looked to him for a moment and he nodded. "No matter what, I wont tell." He insisted and I nodded, exhaling.
"Well...I don't know. When Aaron started showing his abusive side, it started with him not wanting me to hang out with my friends anymore. He'd make me make up excuses to not hang out with them and after about two weeks they just...forgot about me." I looked up to see his face hadn't changed. His eyes still sad, his undivided attention on me. I sighed. "Like I was nothing to them. We were supposed to be close...I'd known some of them since kindergarten. And they just...it only took them two weeks." I confessed angrily. "That's kind of when this started. My self worth kind of tanked. It was really lonely and isolating to feel like these people I thought I was close to didn't even...they didn't even care that I wasn't around anymore after thirteen years of friendship. It was like...maybe I never actually had them at all. I had... a lot of feelings about it but I couldn't complain. I had Aaron and at the time...I thought he was going to be mine forever. I didn't want to whine." I shrugged and looked down to our hands.
"After that Aaron started getting more demanding and angry. He didn't want me to hang out with his friends...then he didn't want to even be seen with me." I confessed and heard him scoff.
"Excuse me?" He asked and I looked up to see his brown furrowed. I nodded.
"Yeah...he said it was embarrassing." His eyes went wide and he shook his head.
"He wouldn't let his own girlfriend be seen with him?" he asked and I nodded.
"Yeah. He said I was too fat and he had an image to maintain. That...hurt. It definitely didn't help my self-loathing. But I also knew not having me around was convenient for him too." He gave me a confused look.
"What do you mean?" He asked and I shrugged.
"That way he could fuck around without worrying about running into me." His eyes went wide again. "Kind of easy to be out with other girls when you have your girlfriend locked in her room with her homework every night or cast off at lunch."
"Wait...he wouldn't even spend time with you at school?" He asked and I shook my head. It was a behaviour that just felt normal now.
"It was really weird to me to walk through the halls with you guys at first." I confessed and hurt flashed in his eyes.
"Why?"
"Well...look at me." I said, laughing without humour. He only watched my eyes and I sighed, continuing my story.
"When I would get overwhelmed or upset I just found myself picking at my nails and hands. When I was more upset it would get more... aggressive. I just...it was my way of coping I guess." I told him and looked up to see his eyes cast down. He was very still, his shoulders moving slightly with each slow breath.
"What else." He asked and I shrugged.
"Uh...I don't know. When he started...hitting me...I guess it would help me get through the fear. It almost felt like it grounded me to feel something other than just the fear and anticipation of what he would do next. I started scratching a lot to cope with that too." He still didn't move.
"When would you not eat?" He asked quietly, his voice dead and even. I faltered a bit, not really wanting to answer. After about a minute of opening and closing my mouth I furrowed my brow.
"I, um...I guess..." I took a deep breath. "When...when the...when it was a beating. Like...when it was...bad...I'd...I found it hard to eat afterwards. I'd sometimes go a day, maybe two. Or...or when like...my mom failed to see there was something really wrong. I'd...I'd go a day...sometimes just to see if she'd notice." I confessed and he was still quiet. I was starting to get nervous, not knowing what he was thinking.
"Can you... can you please... move. Or... say something." I asked quietly and he gave my hand a squeeze, looking up, his eyes still glassy. He took a deep breath, seeming reluctant to speak.
"What was it that made you go three days?" He asked and I felt my eyes go wide. I looked down immediately, not realizing the corner I'd backed myself into. I shook my head. "No...I...I need to know." He told me and I shook my head again.
"Bella. I know this is new but... you're pretty much one of the closest true friends I've ever had. And maybe that's weird...I don't know. But what I do know is I cant let this conversation go. I need to know." He told me and I felt tears welling in my eyes. I was silent for a few minutes before he spoke again.
"What happened?" he whispered and I closed my eyes, my head down. I felt pain in my chest at the memory and pulled my hands away. I didn't want to be touched at the moment. I took a few breaths before I spoke in a shaky voice.
"One...one night. I... um...He came over...after one of his football games. I...I wasn't allowed to go so I...I was at my house. My mom and Phil...were out." I started, finding it hard to focus. I'd never shared this story with anyone and every part of me was screaming to shut up and walk out. "He...they lost and he was...he was angry. He um, he wanted to..." I trailed off, the words not wanting to exit my mouth. I felt the bed shift under me as Emmett moved closer, but he didn't touch me.
"You can tell me." He told me quietly and a sob escaped me at his soothing voice. I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around my legs. I held myself together tightly, very aware of how alone I'd been the last ten months. I'd had no one. I had no one who would even care to listen to what I was about to say. Hearing Emmett speak made me feel afraid...what if he didn't want to be around me anymore? What if this was too broken. I found myself needing to hold myself together, very aware that I was all I truly had. I was my only guarantee in life. I put my head down on my knees, crying. I was too far in to stop...I knew he'd never let me leave like this. I'd have to confess my darkest secret in detail and let him either stay or go. I took a deep, tear-soaked breath before resting my chin on my knees. I didn't bother to look at him, knowing id lose my nerve.
"He wanted to fool around. And I didn't...so I said no. But...but that made him even more angry." I cried and I felt my body shaking at the memory. It was as if I could feel his hands on me once again. I closed my eyes, able to see the events unfolding on my eyelids. "He grabbed me by the hair and...and he dragged me up to my room. He...he threw me onto my bed...and...and he tried to start but...I kept telling him no. I tried... I tried to...push him off. But...he was so strong. He...he hit me in the face and...and I got scared. I...I just...stopped fighting." I cried, seeing Aaron's huge body hovering above me, ripping my jeans open and stripping my lower half down naked. I could feel his body pressing mine to the bed as he violated me. "That... that was the first time...that he raped me." I confessed in a whisper. I felt the bed shift and heard footsteps. It only took me a second to realize my fate. Emmett had left. I buried my head in my arms and let myself cry. It was the first time I'd said the word aloud and could feel my whole body ache at the vivid memory. After that night I didn't eat for three days.
After a few minutes I took a deep shaky breath, my tears slowing and my emotions leveling out. I lifted my head and opened my eyes to see Emmett standing at the foot of the bed, watching me. Tears were streaked down his cheeks and everything about what made him Emmett was stripped away. There was no lightheartedness, no smile, no air of confidence. He looked defeated and devastated. I felt shock on my face as we made eye contact.
"You...you're still here?" I asked and saw hurt take hold of his blue eyes.
"What?" he whispered and I shrugged.
"I thought you left." I said quietly, not sure where we stood. He shook his head, gripping his chest.
"You think I would just...leave you here?" he asked and I shrugged.
"I don't know...I...I've never told anyone before." I explained and he rubbed his hands over his face.
"Is this why you were just so afraid of Edward?" he asked and I nodded. His shoulders slumped again and he began pacing. He took a few minutes to compose himself before he looked to me, eyes desperate.
"Can I please touch you?" he whispered and I felt surprised.
"You...you still want to touch me?" I asked and he let out an involuntary sob. I nodded, heartbroken by what my story had done to him. He wasted no time in grabbing me off the bed and lifting me up into his arms. He held me as close as he could get me, crying quietly into my hair. My feet dangled off the floor as he held me firmly to his chest, not giving any signs of putting me down any time soon. We stood there for a few minutes before he set me back down on the edge of the bed. He kneeled in front of me on the floor and held my hands.
"Bella do not for a second think this would scare me off. Of course I still want to touch you. Bella you...you're one of the most resilient people I've ever met. I'm so...I'm so sorry. You don't deserve that. You... ugh fuck." He growled, putting his head down. I could see his shoulders shaking again and put a shaky hand up into his hair. I twirled soft circles into his coffee coloured hair and felt him rest his head in my lap. I put both hands onto his head and neck comfortingly, giving him his moment. I felt him take a deep breath and look up to meet my eyes, my hands falling to the sides of his neck.
"I'm not leaving your side...ever. Not unless you send me away. Do you understand?" he told me and I took a breath before nodding.
"I...I don't ever want to. Is... is that ok?" I asked and he nodded desperately. Pulling me into a hug. I wrapped my arms around his neck and sighed.
"I don't know how I'll ever thank you." I whispered and he pulled away, looking to me confused. I shrugged.
"I don't know what I would do without you. I've known you for two weeks and it feels like two years. You just...you're like the best friend I've ever had." I said, feeling stupid. It was true though. No one other than my dad and Jasper has ever treated me with so much value. He nodded, wiping my drying tears.
"I feel the same way. Other than my sister and Jasper...I really don't have true friends. You're like...one of the only people in a really long time that actually... cares." I smiled sadly to him, putting my hand on his cheek.
"I do care." I told him and he nodded.
"So do I." I smiled and nodded.
"I know." We were silent for a few moments before I yawned.
"Can we lay down?" I asked and he nodded. I got up and grabbed my bag, dropping it on the bed. I pulled out my pjs and noticed Emmett tossing a pillow and blanket on the floor. I gave him a confused look as he turned to me.
"What are you doing?" I asked and he looked to the bed.
"I'm giving you the bed." He told me and I shook my head.
"You're not sleeping on the floor..." I told him and he scoffed.
"You're not either." He told me and I bent down and tossed his pillow back on the bed.
"Emmett... I trust you." I told him and he gave me a look.
"Why?" he asked and I felt confused.
"What?" I asked and he shrugged, sitting on the bed.
"Why do you trust me so much?" he asked and I watched him hesitantly.
"...because...you aren't going to try anything?" I answered hesitantly, unsure where he was going with this. He gave me a look I couldn't read.
"You did hear Jasper downstairs, right? Telling me to behave? Why do you think that is?" he asked me and I could only watch him. "Because I sleep with a lot of girls, Bella. I hook up all the time." I shrugged.
"So?" I asked and he shook his head.
"So? So why are you so sure I wont hit on you?" He asked and I shrugged.
"Why would you hit on me? I'm confused...I thought it was a good thing that I trusted you?" I asked, unsure where he was going with this. He shrugged.
"Why wouldn't I?" he asked and I laughed.
"Be serious, Emmett." I joked and he shook his head.
"I am. Why are you so sure I'm not going to try to hook up with you?" he asked and I felt my brow furrow with confusion.
"Look at me." I told him and he furrowed his brow, confused too.
"I am."
"Then you get it." I told him flatly, starting to feel frustrated. He shook his head again.
"No, I don't."
"Don't be ridiculous, Emmett. Look at you and then look at me. Tall, handsome, football player. Gets all the gorgeous girls. Doesn't even have to try and has girls that look like Jess begging to jump into bed with you. Meanwhile my ex boyfriend wouldn't even be seen in public with me because I literally cant look good at any weight. I look exhausted constantly, I'm a giant pain in the ass with absolutely everything I do. And you ask me how I know you wont try to sleep with me? Come on, Emmett. I am fully aware that guys looking for a good time don't choose me." I told him and his expression was unreadable.
"Edward wanted to come up here with you." He told me and I shook my head.
"Oh yes. What an honour it is to be chosen as the last possible girl in the room." I said, shaking my head. He watched me for a minute before sighing.
"Bella, you cant hate yourself so much that you really think no one finds you attractive."
"Oh, but I can." I said sarcastically and he shook his head.
"Bella, you are a beautiful girl." He told me and I laughed. He looked like he had been slapped. "Seriously? That makes so little sense to you, that you laugh?" he asked and I sighed.
"Why are we doing this?" I asked quietly and he stood up, looking to me.
"Because. The right answer to my question was because I care about you. Because I value your friendship. Because I'd never ruin this by hooking up with you. Not...'I'm not attractive enough to have sex with'."
Emmett POV
I watched, heartbroken, as she shook her head, laughing off what I said.
"I'm well aware that I'm not what someone like you is looking for, Emmett. And that's perfectly ok." She told me and I felt my chest aching. Why would she ever think I wouldn't want her?
"Yeah. I guess you're right. Because I don't do the relationship thing and you're infinitely better than Jess will ever be. But that has nothing to do with how attractive you are. Beautiful, sexy, gorgeous, hot, pretty, whatever word you use, it doesn't matter. You are those things, Bella. And the fact that you think you're so immune to me because I think you're not attractive enough to do is really upsetting. You're more beautiful to me than Jess or Lauren will ever be. I wont hit on you because I respect you too much. That is the only answer." I looked to her to see her picking at her hand. I closed the distance between us and grabbed her hands.
"You are gorgeous, Bella. I don't care if I have to remind you every goddamn day. I will, until it sticks. Don't you ever sell yourself that short again." I told her and saw a tear slip down her cheek. I wiped it away and gave her a tight hug. I pulled away after a few seconds and motioned to the bathroom.
"Go get ready for bed." I told her and she nodded, grabbing her clothes. I sat on the bed as she disappeared behind the bathroom door and sighed.
Bella's self-deprecating attitude killed me. She was skinny, sure. I know she would be more attractive physically once she was healthy. But that didn't mean she wasn't still sexy. Everything about her was beautiful and for her to say that I would never want her...it killed me. I obviously didn't want to sleep with her...I care far too much about her friendship to ever ruin what we have but that didn't mean she wasn't gorgeous. I sighed, rubbing my neck. I was exhausted after our conversation and just wanted to pass out. I looked to the door as she emerged, sporting pj shorts and an old band tee. I smiled at how effortlessly beautiful she was. She climbed into bed slowly and I got up to run to the bathroom myself. I tossed on my pj pants and threw my shirt in my bag. I brushed my teeth and came back out, finding Bella with heavy eyelids. I smiled and shut off the light, wandering over to the bed. I was silent for a moment before she spoke, her voice soft and tired.
"Can you...hug me?" she asked and I nodded, slipping under the covers with her. I curled up next to her, slipping my arm under her head and pulled her close. She rested her head and arm on my chest and I felt her melt into me. I gently played with her hair and felt her breathing even out.
"You're a true angel, Emmett." She mumbled and I smiled, glancing down to her in the dark.
"An angel?" I asked amused by her exhausted mumblings. She nodded slightly and exhaled, her hot breath fanning over my chest.
"You're slowly saving me." She whispered and I felt my chest tighten at her words. I felt her sigh and knew she was asleep, her body dead weight on mine. I held her tighter and leaned down to kiss the top of her head.
"Goodnight, beautiful." I whispered before closing my eyes, falling asleep to the feel of Bella's even breath soothing my exhausted body.
I was super pumped for this chapter! Rewriting these moments is a lot of fun.
Review, review, review!