As Buck moved his head slowly as the thumping from his headache had intensified when the sun hit his eyes. He quickly closed his eyes and rolled to the other side of the bed avoiding the sun. With a swift move, he positioned himself upright and sat there for a while as his body adjusted to the sudden movement. He could feel all of last night's drink in him as he carefully opened his eyes and blinked to clear the sleep. He took in his room he was glad it was his but still no idea how he got back, he glanced down and was still in the same clothes as the night before. A sound downstairs made him realize he wasn't alone but anger boiled up again as he remembered what had led him to drink in the first place.
He jumps when the alarm on his phone starts going off. Buck looks round and spots it on his bedside table. Yet it was accompanied by a glass of water and some aspirin with a little note just stating drink this and take two. He studied the writing he wasn't familiar with, he turned to his phone and swipes, turning the alarm off and quickly taking the aspirin as well as downing half the glass of water. Buck quickly heads to the shower with a change of clothes, he knew he had to be at work and today was going to be rough.
Felling a bit fresh and not so hungover after his shower he placed his clean clothes on and grabbed his stuff. He quickly checked the time and he was running late. He slipped his trainers on as he ran down the stairs, he was greeted by a mess all over the kitchen. He let a huff out exasperated as he had no time to sort this. So instead he just grabbed a travel cup and poured a very large coffee before heading to the door.
"Buck, can we talk about last night?" Albert's voice came from the living room making Buck stop.
Buck didn't want to answer, he was so pissed at Alberts betrayal. Buck knew it was irrational to think that way, but still! He turned to look at Albert whose feet made it clear he had walked over to Buck and saw Albert and Veronica. Albert looked worried but Veronica stood there with a grin on her face, wearing one of Alberts shirts and that was it that Buck felt something snap.
"You know what Albert, I don't mind you seeing her at all." Buck says.
"Really? You don't mind?"
"Yeah I don't, but I want you out of my apartment by the time I'm home later, no excuses."
With that Buck opens the door and walks out, slamming it shut which he instantly regretted as it hurt his head. But walking down the hallway he had a smile on his face. As he got in the elevator his thoughts returned to last night, he doesn't remember much after an hour. He recalls taking drink after drink, declined some drugs but after that? He went blank as he got out of the elevator he realized he was in no fit state to drive just yet. So playing it safe, Buck took his phone out and ordered an Uber. He looked at his call log to see if there was any indication of how he got home. He sees several calls off Maddie; all declined. A few off Albert again declined. A few off Eddie where the last one was picked up and lasted several minutes.
"What did I say?"
That's all he needed today. He aimed to avoid any real conversation with Eddie, but now? Now he would have to face Eddie knowing he spoke to a very extremely drunk Buck and he didn't have a single ounce of memory. As he sat there willing his memory to come back so he was ready for whatever was about to be thrown at him at work he was startled by a sound of a horn. As he looks up he is greeted by a masked driver, he hears his phone ping and checks it, and has a message.
'Your driver has arrived regW8A 0YWD.'
Buck gets up and looks at the reg of the car and it matches. People may say he looks like a weird person checking the reg but he had been on a few calls where some person got the wrong uber and was attacked and the way his luck was going, it most likely would happen to him.
As he enters the uber and explains where he wants to go, he settles back and watches the world go by, his head still throbbing. He was expecting Albert to be calling him but nothing as yet.
'Most likely on the phone to Chim.' He thinks.
The ride soon ends and he sees the firehouse through the window, with a sigh he pays the uber and thanks them then gets out. Slowly making his way towards the doors, he surveys the area checking whose cars are there, and thankfully he sees Eddie's truck is not here yet. Feeling a little bit better, he continues into the firehouse walking past B-team who just got back from a call. He smiles at the team and makes his way into the locker room and slowly changes, as he sits down to tie his boots up he hears the door open but doesn't dare to look up.
"So, want to explain what happened this morning?" Chim asks, Buck was not in the mood for this and just wanted this convo over soon as possible.
"To be honest, Chim, it has nothing to do with you, it's my place and I want it back. I don't want to share it with someone who would betray me so easily and who is meant to be as you put it 'family', so this is where the conversation ends ok?" Buck states as he gets up and walks out before Chim can even reply.
Just as he was leaving his head held up, his bad luck kicked in as Eddie came striding towards him and intently looking at him. Before Eddie could get close enough, Buck quickly turns around and guns for the balcony floor. But as he was just about to power walk towards the stairs Eddie called him out.
"Buck! Wait up." Eddie says and Buck could hear his footsteps behind him. Crap!
Buck turns around slowly and looks at Eddie and weirdly, he looks worried. His brows knit together, eyes filled with concern, and his mouth slightly agape like he was finding the right words to say.
"You hungover or anything?" Eddie asks Buck and places his hands on his shoulder. This. This one single gesture was enough to make Buck's stomach flutter. The closeness of Eddie's face and his scent wafting through the air finding its way to Buck's nose. It's these little things that Buck can't get over about. What was it with Eddie that made Buck so starstruck with him? What was it that Buck found so arousing when he smells Eddie's cologne? What was it that made Buck fall in love with Eddie? These incessant questions plagued his mind for the entirety of quarantine. Why the hell did it have to be someone like his best friend? OF ALL PEOPLE!
"No." Buck says firmly, masking his lightheadedness, "I'm fine. You better get dressed, Bobby just called for a briefing at five." He says in an attempt to make Eddie leave.
"You sure? Listen, about yesterday…"
"I was drunk. Yes. But can we not talk about it? Even if we did, I cannot remember how I got out of that bar, much less got home."
"So, you don't remember Taylor finding your drunk ass at the bar? And her calling me to come and pick you up?"
'Wait. Taylor? What? Oh great! Just great!' Buck cursed himself. Just when he got to be in Taylor's good graces and that they've become friends, apparently they've evolved to 'busting each other's ass in the bar and driving them home' stage already. Oh boy, Buck was already mentally preparing an apology and thanks to Taylor for later, but now? He's got his best friend in front of him who seemed to be genuinely concerned whilst being held by Buck's indecision and hypocrisy.
The last time they had a discussion, more like almost a year ago, that they would be completely honest with each other and that they would have each other's backs through thick and thin. And now? Buck was avoiding him because what? He was jealous? Because he felt betrayed by his friend and that they did something they both agreed on not doing but they still did?
"Buck?" Eddie shakes his shoulders slightly getting his attention. "You sure you're supposed to be working right now? I can tell Bobby…"
"No ones telling Bobby anything!" Buck groans, "I'm fine and yes, I am supposed to be working right now. And aren't you supposed to be getting dressed?" And with that Buck turned around and then just jogged towards the stairs hoping to avoid Chim and Eddie. But that was going to be impossible!
As he gets to the top of the stairs he sees Bobby giving him a look and he knows that look. It's the 'you're going tell me what's up ' look. Before Bobby can say anything though Buck moves quickly grabbing a coffee and walking to the far side of the loft, away from everyone. As he settles down slumping back into the seat he takes a sip of his drink as he tries his hardest to remember what happened the night before. He pulls his phone out contemplating that maybe he should message Taylor. His train of thought was broken when he heard Eddie and Chim appear and as he watched them approach the rest of the team he could see them talking and concerned stares towards him.
'If there is some good luck please set the alarm off.' he prays to himself and just like that the bells ring and they are on a roll. Chim and Eddie turned around to check the rest while Buck was already on his feet going down to gear up and ride.
On the way to the call Bobby, Hen, Chim, and Eddie stared at Buck who was looking out the window, avoiding their concerned stares. The silence was unnatural, the air was filled with awkwardness and tense vibes that none dared speak. Despite being uncomfortable himself, Buck was kind of relieved that it was quiet and no one made attempts to talk to him. But he spoke too soon.
"Buck, you okay?" Hen asks through the radio.
"Yeah, I'm fine." Buck says.
Buck turns and smiles at Hen but turns back to the window watching as the world goes by. Bobby's voice comes through explaining about the call, it was a fire at a bookstore which meant it was going up quick and they would need to work fast to stop it from spreading. He was listening in when it suddenly became silent and Buck wondered why Bobby had stopped talking because it sounded like there was more to be said.
"Buckley, are you listening to me?." Bobby addresses him and Buck could see Bobby looking at him from the front seat.
"Yes cap, Bookstore on fire, have to move quickly to stop the spread, please continue." Buck states still staring out the window. Subconsciously, he knew Bobby wanted to say something to him but Bobby just kept it to himself because he continued debriefing the rest on what to do.
When they got on site they could see other firefighters dousing the flames already and now so were they. Bobby split everyone up to help on dousing the flames; Hen and Chim, as always were on rounds checking for injured people whilst Buck and Eddie were tasked to help with dousing the flames. Buck wanted to protest and say that he can do it alone because he doesn't want to talk to Eddie or in fact anyone, but he held his tongue. He didn't want to give Eddie another cause to talk to him.
Silently, him and Eddie calmly took the firehose and hooked it up to the nearest fire hydrant. Buck could see Eddie looking at him.
"So how was your morning?" Eddie asks and Buck forces himself to smile, turn around to face Eddie
"I'm just fine."
"You sure?" Eddie presses and Buck just nods before facing the fire before them.
Was this a justified course of action that Buck should take? That he should just ignore everything by not facing the problem and by resorting to… Questionable coping mechanisms? If Bobby found out he doesn't know what he would do. Of all the years of Buck being a problem child and those years being broken down by these people he was avoiding. He learned that to run away from a problem, he would only be making things worse.
He knows that. He knows. But he should be allowed time, right? Time to process everything?
Several hours later the fire was out and they were about to roll out Eddie's attempts once more to talk to Buck.
"Hey Buck, so me and Ana are throwing a get-together next weekend. Want to come?" Eddie asks.
"In the middle of a pandemic?" Buck retorts back watching his tone.
"I mean, all of us have been vaccinated already. Plus, we've taken precautions. Sanitizing stations on the entrance; alcohol and shoe bath. And we would require everyone to wear their masks unless they're eating or drinking. Don't worry. We got it all planned out." Eddie grins and after hearing all that, Buck somewhat felt awkward.
'We've got it all planned out.' That statement rang through Buck's mind as he stared at Eddie. 'Guess they're a couple who shares everything now, huh?' Suddenly aware that Eddie was still waiting on his answer Buck closed his eyes and exhaled quietly.
"Let me think about it." That was all he said before entering the fire truck. He just wanted to be alone right now but Eddie was one persistent man.
"Okay then, but tell me before my shifts over. I'm going back early because I wanted to do something nice for Ana today, before our date later." Eddie says with lovestruck eyes. And when Buck saw that and felt uneasy, that's when he knew, he was jealous. A hundred percent.
"It's fine Eddie, just focus on your date no need to worry about me." Buck says before sliding along the seats and placing his head against the window.
As they drove back to the station, Buck listened to Eddie mentioning the party to everyone and their talks if it was appropriate but once he explained everything they would have in place they all seemed to jump on the Ana train.
"Choo choo." Buck chuckles to himself.
"See any trains out there Buckaroo?" Hen questions and of course Buck's thoughts and mouth decide to betray him.
"Nothing, just thinking to myself and well you know me." He says without looking at his team who he knew were most likely hands-on looking at him.
The ride back seemed to go quiet after his little burst of random train noises. The dull taps of phones took over and the occasional notification from social media apps., Everyone had someone to message, to check at, or to report to. Whereas all Buck had were the people in the cab and their families. Really hit home how much he was alone.
"Well, it looks like Buck has a visitor, maybe she can put a smile on that miserable face." Chim's over-excited voice made Buck look around.
It was Taylor, of course, it would be. With the way, his luck was why wouldn't it be? When the truck pulls in and everyone jumps out, Buck feels someone grab his arm and he turns to see Eddie who gives him that soft smile and looks like he was about to speak. But before he could Buck decides he can't deal with Eddie right now especially when Taylor was waiting to lecture him no doubt, so he pulls his arm out of Eddie's grip and jumps out of the cab, and marches over to Taylor who thankfully was standing next to her car outside the firehouse.
"What are you doing here?" Buck asks, realizing it sounded harsher than it should.
"Uhm, okay so is that how friends greet each other now? I was just checking in that you are doing all right especially after last night. But clearly not with that attitude." she says and she glanced past Buck, probably someone from the team, "But guessing he has something to do with the mood." Buck looks behind him to where Taylor was staring at and he sees Eddie watching suddenly wiping the trucks when they were just fine.
"No." Buck says as he turns to see Taylor smirking at him, "Fine, maybe."
"Yeah thought as much, guessing he explained about how you ended up back at home?"
"Yeah well, but I didn't give him really much time to explain, how did I get home?" Buck says and Taylor exhales loudly.
"You free right now?"
"As long as the bell doesn't ring, I am. Why?"
Taylor's POV
Working as a news reporter meant that she had a little time to really let loose. So tonight after wrapping up another story, she skedaddled off to find a bar that was open despite the quarantine regulations. Most shops closed around eight or nine on the dot, same with bars, but she knew a bar or two that were owned by rascals that Taylor knew.
Navigating her way, she found herself outside one of the bars that were still open despite it being past twelve midnight. The bar owner was called Randy and despite having a menacing and intimidating look, he's actually a softie at heart and just wanted to keep people company. Thus, opening a bar at the age of forty-six because why not?
Upon entering, she went to the counter to order drinks. She really wasn't feeling fancy tonight so she went against her usual wine and decided on scotch.
"Hey Taylor, how's it going?" Randy appears from behind the bar holding red wine.
"Oh, no thanks. Scotch, neat please." Taylor says and Randy eyes her suspiciously.
"Rough night?" Randy inquires while he makes Taylor's drink.
"No," Taylor says as she looks around and sees a familiar figure. Blond hair, brown jacket, and nursing a beer on their hands. "But it's about to be. Thanks Randy." She says then hands him a twenty.
"Ah, no need…" Randy says but Taylor insists.
"Take it. Might need some more later." Taylor says then grabs her drink before making her way to the figure.
When she approached the figure, she knew who it was. Of course, she knew. How could she forget those blue eyes and blonde hair.
"Hey." Taylor says sitting down in front of one Evan Buckley.
"T-Taylor? What are you doing here?" He asks with hooded eyes and damn he is drunk as a skunk. Looking around the table he was at, there were already ten empty bottles of beer while he was nursing one.
"You drink this much on a workday?" Taylor asks, trying to make the conversation light and calm.
"Oh, no… Is it Saturday?" Buck asks while he looks for his phone, "I-I have a fourteen-hour shift on Saturday and Bobby will kill me if I show up drunk." He continues as he fumbles with his phone.
"It's Friday, Buck." Taylor says to Buck and takes a sip from her drink.
"Oh, crap." Buck says and he hangs his head low, "So what are you doing here?" Buck questions.
"To do the same thing as you." She says.
"To run away from something?" With that Taylor looked at Buck to see him staring back, eyes hopeful.
"What? No. To let loose." Taylor says and that's when it hits her, "Are you?"
Buck fell silent and he kept quiet. Recently, Buck had this wall around him. Tall and impregnable which was very uncharacteristic of him. She knew Buck to be a carefree person, a man with his heart on his sleeve, a bleeding heart. Of all her years that she was a journalist, she picked up on how to read people just from their face and body movement. So she trusted her instincts when she first met Buck. He was such a seemingly innocent person with his boyish grin and baby blue eyes, but behind that facade was an adult who would willingly risk his life to save people. She told herself, this is a good man. So now she was wondering, what had gotten into this man for him to be so unreachable?
As she stared at him Buck's phone rang. For a bit Buck looked at the phone, contemplating, before ending the call. It was just a quick glance, but she saw a picture of a man, a child with glasses, and Buck. The man seemed to be a Latino because of those fierce eyes, but it was soft too. The child on the other hand had a big smile on his face and was wearing blocky glasses. She looked at the caller ID. Eddie.
"Whose that?" Taylor asks inconspicuously half eying Buck, half eying his phone. Taylor knew who Eddie was. He was Buck's best friend, and he could not stop yapping about Eddie even back when they were together.
"Nobody." Buck said but as he said it Taylor could see a hint of something slit through Buck's eyes.
"Really? Doesn't seem that way."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Buck says in disbelief.
'Looks like I've hit a nerve.' Number one in the business of journalism, once you get a sniff on a good scoop. Don't let go. But Buck's one of the people she actually considers a friend. So does she want to do this to him? Well, he's clearly struggling so maybe by finding out what's causing him to act out so much she could help.
Before she could say anything else, Buck excused himself and went to the bathroom, leaving her, a couple of empty beers, and his phone alone. 'Damn, just when…' Taylor's thoughts were cut off by Buck's phone ringing again. But this time, it was a picture of a woman and Buck. The woman had darker hair compared to Buck and her eyes were joyful. She recognized that woman, it was his sister Maddie.
She shouldn't pry and just waited the call out. The call went to voicemail as Buck came back from the restroom. When he sat down this time, his phone rang again and it's Eddie again.
"You're clearly famous right now." Taylor remarks pointing to Buck's phone, "That's three phone calls already since I got here. Tell me, how many more did you ignore before I was here?"
"It's nothing." Buck replies as he doesn't answer the phone and it goes to voicemail again. Then it rings again. Eddie.
"Doesn't look like nothing to me." Taylor says and Buck just rolls his eyes before finishing his beer.
"Okay! Maybe… I have a problem." Buck admits while his phone rejects the call once more. "And that's part of it." He says pointing to his phone.
"What? Eddie? Your best friend? What's he got to do with it?" Taylor asks and that's when she saw another flick in Buck's eyes.
"I- He… God, I don't know! It's just that…'' Then he went on telling his latest, most awkward moment with his best friend's girlfriend, his roommate Albert getting back together with… Veronica. Oh God, she remembered that awkward double date they had where Buck clearly just used her to be a trophy. Honestly? That hurt. But that's done and over plus he explained himself succinctly and truthfully so it's fine now. But when he told me that they supposedly broke up just to make Buck feel safe around Albert? Tea spilled sis, but ouch.
"Why am I feeling so threatened by Ana? She's Eddie's girlfriend and yet… And yet…" Buck struggles as he finds the words but Taylor already has a theory. All she needed to have was evidence, and speak of the devil, Buck's phone rang.
Buck just stared at the phone. He looked like he wanted to take it but he was struggling. That's it. That was all Taylor needed.
"Buck, are you, by chance… Attracted to men?" When Taylor asked that he looked up at her and she could have sworn he blushed despite his face's redness due to alcohol. Bingo.
Taking everything into the moment, she grabs Buck's phone and answers the phone.
"Hey Buck, where are you? Maddie and Albert have been trying to get a hold of you this whole evening… Hello" Eddie's voice came through and Buck glared at Taylor for answering. "Buck are you in a bar or something?"
"Uh, hi yes he is and he is drunk as hell. Send help." Taylor says quickly as she fends off Buck trying to grab the phone back. If it wasn't for his drunkenness he could have easily grabbed it back.
"Who is this?"
"Taylor. Remember me, firefighter?" Taylor says smiling as Buck had seemed to have given up and was just glaring daggers at her. "Your best friend here is drunk and he needs help going home. Care to lend a hand?"
"Firstly, how did you find him, and secondly, where are you guys?" Eddie asks and Taylor fills him in on their current location, "See you in a bit." Taylor ends the call and gives Buck his phone back.
"Why. Would. You. Do. That?!" Buck growls at her.
"Because you're drunk. And you need to go home. Plus, I can't carry you back to your apartment. I mean do you know how heavy you are?"
"But still!" Buck protested to which Taylor silenced him by putting her finger on his lips.
"No but's! I'm here trying to help you as a friend. Okay? That's what friends do. We look out for each other, remember?" At that comment Buck fell silent and just crossed his arms, keeping his phone near him.
After what felt like thirty minutes she saw another familiar face amongst the crowd. Eddie. She waves him over and then looks over back to Buck. And there! She was right. She could see Buck's walls crumbling down when he saw Eddie, but he built it back up just as quickly as it went down. He's in denial of his own feelings.
Pleasantries over with, Taylor asks Randy to keep a tab open as she will just pay him back tomorrow and they proceed to put Buck on Eddie's jeep. The drive over to Buck's apartment was quiet. But Taylor caught Eddie looking over Buck through the mirror, checking him out, more than once.
When they got to his apartment block, Taylor remembered there was a drug store nearby and so she told Eddie to wait for her for a bit before leading Buck back to his loft. She went on and bought aspirin and borrowed a pen and paper from the registrar, she wrote that he should take this when he wakes up and then pays for the meds. The trip inside was Eddie mostly supporting Buck and Taylor tailing behind. Upon opening his door, they saw Albert and he helped bring Buck in. Having been here before, she got a glass and filled it with water then proceeded upstairs to where both men left Buck there. Buck was just quiet and covered himself in sheets without changing. Gross. At least change before sleeping Buck!
Nevertheless, she left the glass of water, note, and aspirin on his bedside as she and Eddie made their way out. On the elevator ride, Eddie addressed Taylor.
"Thank you for that." He says and Taylor looks at him. The first time she met this man, he was the one with tall and impregnable walls, not Buck. But now, they seemed to have changed. Eddie now had this softness around him, as if he never was that rigid man she met a year ago.
"Well, that's what friends do, right? Look after each other?" Taylor says and Eddie nods.
"Hey, did he say anything else when you were talking to him? Anything on why he went on drinking?" Eddie inquired and Taylor inhaled. Loudly. She had tea! But no, it wasn't hers to spill. So all that she said was that she just found Buck in the bar she normally went to, and that's it.