Chapter 3: Commerce of the Heart

"No way," Chongyun spoke softly, splashing his face with cold water. It was an informal part of his morning routine: wake up, get dressed, and briefly wash his face before attending to his other needs. It was a refreshing action, and one that helped him recollect his thoughts.

"No way," he repeated, shaking his head. His temple was pounding from a sizable headache and building pressure in his forehead. A headache caused by his stress and lack of sleep.

I couldn't sleep last night, he thought to himself as he paced around the room.

There was just too much on his mind. The same thought, the same question, that had troubled him overnight was still with him as he woke up. Am I in love?

Chongyun kept telling himself it was an absurd question. Afterall he was an adventurer, an exorcist, and an experienced one at that. His thoughts and emotions were supposed to be centered on those things. A rigid bulwark that stood between him and the struggles of being in battle. But that rigid structure had been shaken at its roots by an unknown feeling he found difficult to comprehend.

Every time I think about him, Chongyun thought to himself. That feeling comes back.

"Is this love?" he asked himself, peering into a mirror. "But that would mean…"

He grasped his head in frustration, running his hands through his hair. I'm in love with Xingqiu.

"This is bad," Chongyun shook his head. "Does this mean we can't be friends anymore?"

It was a disturbing thought, that a new and wild emotion could destroy a friendship that had lasted their lifetime. There was something deeply worrying about it to him, more so than any spirit, abyss mage, or bandit. If this feeling got out, it would mean the end of his friendship. The loss of the closest person to him. Chongyun tried to rationalize a course of action, running the possibilities through his head.

But...what if he feels the same way?

His heart skipped a beat, fluttering away from his senses. Suddenly a solution to the dilemma appeared. It was possible to keep his friend, albeit in a way that was far closer than before. All he needed to do was confirm that Xingqiu felt the same way…

"Uggh," Chongyun groaned. "But if he doesn't." He pounded his temple on the wall. It eased his frustration a little.

Come to think of it, Xingqiu was acting pretty odd the other day. He scratched his head. Maybe that's a sign…

Chongyun shook his head once more, "Or it could just be a false lead." Xingqiu's antics were unusual at times, but that was just who he was around his close friends, not anything out of the ordinary.

He shot a glance at the calendar on the far wall. "Right, we have to head to that hot spring tonight."

His heart fluttered again, becoming harder to contain with each passing moment. I'm dead, Chongyun couldn't get the image of him being boiled alive out of his head. And then there was Xingqiu...Chongyun felt his temperature rise as his imagination ran wild. He shook his head, "This isn't good."

Xingqiu awoke from bed more tired than he'd ever felt in his life. He barely slept last night, in between the arguments downstairs and his own flustered thoughts. He couldn't get the images out of his head, Chongyun, he thought to himself. His mind reviewing the mental image of his friend shirtless during yesterday's heatwave.

He couldn't distance himself from the arguments either. They were loud, and close to home.

"How am I supposed to find that much Mora by the end of the month?" his father boomed, muffled lightly by the walls.

"We should negotiate the loan, we can probably settle the debt," Xingqiu recognized the voice as his brother's.

His family all lived on the same estate just outside the commerce district of Liyue, it was a sizable portion of land and housing afforded to them by their wealth. Although it seemed that both their family, and their wealth was in danger. Everything came down to Mora, and one stroke of bad luck with the trading guild had landed them in a tough spot.

"They won't let us off like that, not after how much we owe them," his father argued. "Asides, this is about more than just the Mora, we have a reputation to uphold!"

Xingqiu buried his head into his pillow, trying to shut out the world around him. It didn't matter that he was a skilled martial artist, it didn't matter that he wrote and published novels, and it didn't matter that he was an adventurer. Everything came down to the family business, and Xingqiu had neither the talent or care for the world of finances. It was something his father had become increasingly frustrated over.

He could still vividly recall their last argument, how his father had tried to convince him to quit adventuring and help his brother full time with accounting. There was a pipe dream in his father's vision that saw every one of his sons with their own hand in the commerce guild, something that would keep the family fortune alive for generations.

It made Xingqiu's blood boil to think about. He wasn't a child, but at times it felt like everyone treated him like one. Even outside his family, members of the guild never took him seriously, nor did they appreciate his humor or antics.

"Ugggh," he groaned, leaning back on his bedside.

And then there was his friend to think about.

I can't really be in love with Yun right? Xingqiu thought to himself, tossing and turning on his bed.

There had to be another reason why I felt the way I did. Memories of the last few days came rushing back to him, his mind tried to piece together their contents. But no matter how hard he rationalized it, the only conclusion he could reach…

Xingqiu shook his head, as the mental images of his friend became overwhelming. "I really am in love with him!" He shouted into his pillow.

What else could I be feeling?

His heart dropped.

What if Yun doesn't feel the same way? He tried to swallow that thought and process the potential reality it held. It didn't feel good to think about, or dwell on. Yet he couldn't dismiss it. The thought hung around at the back of his mind, daring him to approach. Daring him to believe it.

"But what if he does!" he yelped into his pillow a second time, moving his legs up behind him in a flurry of kicks.

He thought back to yesterday, how disinterested and awkward his friend seemed to have been. Maybe he was upset with my pranks, Xingqiu rationalized. Maybe he doesn't love me.

He shook his head. Rallying his spirits up along with his body. There was still tonight to make an impression, and if he was careful enough he could confirm how Chongyun felt. There was just one problem….How do I make an impression on Yun?

Xingqiu scrambled his thoughts. They were an anxious mess of worries and doubts. Whenever an idea came to mind he second guessed himself; whenever a problem came to pass, he dwelled on it internally for far longer than normal.

"What should I wear? How should I do my hair?!" he scrambled around his room. "Is this good enough?! Ohmygoshwhatiswrongwithme?!"

"He's probably still asleep," Chongyun reasoned while leaving his house. "Xingqiu is always calm and intuitive. I wish I could be like him sometimes." He turned his attention to the streets of Liyue, and began his trek through the busy streets.

His objective was the pharmacy, it occurred to him that perhaps there was something that would alleviate his dilemma. A tonic of sorts that could protect him from the scorching heat of the sauna. It wasn't a new idea to him, by any means, but from what Chongyun did know about 'Cooling Potions' available they always came with extreme side effects. Something that had made him afraid to try them out as a way to cure his condition. But the situation warranted extreme solutions. If I don't do this, I could lose Xingqiu. Chongyun thought to himself as he neared the pharmacy.

If he was being honest to himself, he wasn't even sure a potion would work. Over the years he'd tried just about every sort of remedy to his Pure Yang Spirit, and none had truly cured his condition. Not even jumping into the frigid waters of Dragonspine lake.

But he had to try something even if there was only a small chance of success, "This could be my only chance to make an impression." He clenched his fist with determination.

Controlling his feelings before had always required discipline and timing. Especially in the heat of battle where split second decisions could decide the outcome. Why would love be any different? He figured.

Afterall as far as he knew, tonight would be his only chance to get close to Xingqiu when he was at ease. With how the Adventurer Guilds had been issuing commissions lately, it was likely they wouldn't see each other again for quite some time. Their work placing a barrier between them.

"I'll make it count, and if he feels the same way..." he paused. There was a mental struggle to find the next course of logical thought. As if his mind was wandering in uncharted territory. His heart skipped a beat.

If he feels the same way, Chongyun thought. Then what?

His train of thought drifted away as he entered the pharmacy. Bubu Pharmacy was regarded as the finest in Liyue, if he couldn't find what he needed here then it didn't exist.

There was a stiff short figure of a girl, clad in indigo and purple, standing at attention from behind the counter ahead.

"Hello, how is your morning? Mine is fine, I think, I don't remember." Qiqi spoke in a slow and static tone, just as rigid and unflinching as her facial expressions.

"It's fine," Chongyun eased into the conversation with a soft lie. In truth his morning had made him into an anxious mess. "I'm here to pick up a potion."

"Do you have a prescription?" her head gave a slight nod as she turned her gaze into a nearby set of notes. It was a whole stack of papers and books titled 'Daily Diaries for Reminders'.

"No, I'm looking for a one time purchase of Lunar Frost Tonic."

"Ah, a cooling potion. I think." Qiqi paused and stepped away from the counter. "We should have some in stock."

She trotted her way towards a nearby cabinet with a rigid set of motion. Joints and muscles moved with only half the fluid motion implied by her human appearance. Qiqi opened the cabinet, lightly bumping her head against the cabinet door with a thud.

It was empty.

"Looks like we have none left." She spoke, turning back to Chongyun.

His stomach tightened, "Can you make more?" Chongyun asked with a pleading tone.

"Master Baizhu is out gathering herbs. I forgot how to make the potion."

He was beginning to get worried. Chongyun needed that potion if he was to attend the event later that evening. If he couldn't, he would be forced to leave his friend alone for the night. The opportunity to make an impression on Xingqiu lost before anything could be done.

"Maybe I can help you remember?"

"Sure, I think. I just need the recipe." Qiqi pointed to another stack of books on a shelf at the far end of the room.

"Right." Chongyun nodded. He immediately set out to work, not wanting to waste any more time. Flipping through the myriad of texts and pages in search of what he desperately needed.

Book searching, he thought. That's Xingqiu's talent. He thought about Xingqiu, how his eyes were always buried into some book. His delicate hands pursed around its pages, while a smirk hid behind them. It was a comforting thought for Chongyun.

He shook his head and cursed in frustration. Most of the texts weren't labeled and they often had few illustrations to speak of. Just walls of text written in alchemical jargon he found difficult to comprehend.

After close to an hour of flipping through pages, Chongun found it. It was a piece of dated crumpled parchment that had been sandwiched between two books. The handwriting was awful, but Chongyun could make out it's contents. He handed it to Qiqi, her gaze empty and drifting into space.

"Thank you," she said. "I'll begin."

Her joints snapped into action, throwing together an assortment of herbs and ingredients into a small mortar.

"Salt. Small Lamp Grass. Philanemo Mushrooms. Silk Flower." Qiqi spoke in a low tone as she combined the mixture. "Slime concentrate, heat shield oil…"

Once the dry items had been assembled and ground together, she combined them with the liquid mixture in a small cauldron. "Boil over low fire. I think."

Suddenly, a flame lit out from below the cauldron. And before long the strange mixture was brewing.

"So...what was your name again?" Qiqi asked, perking her head above the counter.

"Chongyun," he glanced nervously at the brewing mixture. "Are you sure that's drinkable?" The mixture appeared a dark indigo in color, and had a strange glow dipping in and on its surface.

Stirring the mixture, Qiqi replied, "I don't remember."

"Ehh," Chongyun's hair stood on end. He thought of Xingqiu. His heart skipped. He thought about the potion, and if he couldn't obtain it. His heart stopped.

If there's a chance, he thought.

"Is it almost ready?" he asked.

"Ummm….I think so." Qiqi glanced at the mixture. "Just need to add the final ingredients."

"Eh?! There's more?!"

She opened another cabinet at the fore end of the counter. And withdrew a small vial, and a jug.

"Milk," she poured the jug's contents into the mixture. It frothed around and thickened the brew. Before she placed the jug away, Qiqi made sure to take a sip of it herself.

Returning her attention to the cauldron she drew the vial. "And the final ingredient. At least I think it is," she said, glancing at the recipe. "Jueyun Chili concentrate."

Chongyun froze, "Wait what?"

She poured a few drops of the vial in, and stirred the mixture. "All done." And she poured the cauldron's contents into a large glass bottle.

Is she trying to kill me?!

He put the clamour of the house behind him. Xingqiu didn't want to be around the stress and toxicity his family was embroiled in. Asides he had important things to attend to. Namely, preparation for tonight's venue.

I have to make an impression tonight, he thought, gritting his teeth. I embarrassed myself the other day. He thought back to yesterday, how foolish and clueless he looked in front of Chongyun. He shook his head.

"Honestly, what was wrong with me then?" he tightened his hand into a fist. "I may have been a fool then, but tonight…"

Xingqiu tried to piece together a mental picture of how the evening would proceed. All that came to mind were images of his friend. Oh Morax, I'm going to be an even bigger idiot tonight! He shook his head, flustered as he blushed at the thought of Chongyun and the hot spring.

"Why is this happening to me?" Xingqiu took a moment to compose himself by the roadside. Letting the crowd of carts, people, and other oddities pass by him. "I've known Yun Yun for years, and I haven't felt like this before."

He tried to search his mind for any rational reason. Any sign that perhaps it was all just a fleeting emotion, or something else entirely. And again, all that came to mind were the scattered images of Chongyun. Suddenly everything about him became an intoxicating memory, the way he looked, felt, and smelled; his expressions, and quirky mannerisms.

Xinqiu chuckled, "Yun's so cute when he's flustered."

Exiting the residential district, he passed by the corner of the market. It was busy as usual, commerce never stopped in Liyue, there were large crowds gathered around dozens of vendors and shops. Innumerable people gathered into the tight spaces between the sights and scents of a hundred different venues.

"Maybe I'm overthinking all of this," Xingqiu admitted to himself, as his gaze passed over his surroundings. I'm his closest friend, I don't have to impress or catch his attention. "I just need to talk to him, and be direct."

His gaze caught sight of a distant couple holding hands under the shade of the marketplace. That could be us, Xingqiu thought to himself. "Right. Just be more direct."

"Thank you, come again," Qiqi said, waving him goodbye.

"Bye, thanks for your help," Chongyun bowed his head lightly before slipping out of the pharmacy.

That took longer than I thought it would, he thought to himself. Although on the brightside it was cheaper than I thought it would be.

Descending the steps that led up to the pharmacy, Chongyun neared the Commerce District. There were more people than before, and the traffic was highly visible even from this far away. He glanced at his coin purse, "I still have some Mora."

Maybe I should get something for Xingqiu tonight, Chongyun thought. Even though it wasn't technically a special occasion, something in him made him feel like it was. They couldn't always spend time like this together, and he was determined to make the most of it.

He rushed towards the market, taking great care to maintain balance on the flight of stairs and to avoid collisions with any passerbys. As he neared the market a hundred different ideas for gifts came to mind. Stuffed animals, expensive jewelry, foreign foods and desserts of all kinds, flashy sets of clothes, and a myriad of other things he found difficult to describe.

"What should I get him?" Chongyun thought. His first thought was a book of some kind, although the more thought he put towards the idea the less likely it seemed. Finding a book Xingqiu hadn't read would be a tremendous undertaking in itself, and Chongyun had to admit he didn't have the eye for such things.

He glanced at the nearby clothing vendors, there were dozens of them selling all sorts of textiles. From suits to dresses, coats to kimonos the market had it all. Even outfits from faraway lands that were sure to catch someone's attention.

Chongyun wandered through the different sights, taking them all in, paying close attention to anything he thought would suit his friend. There were dashing suits from Fontaine, massive fur coats from Snezhnaya that were twice his size, silk dresses from Inazuma, and more exotic turbans and covers from Sumeru.

"Woah," he said, scanning up and down the displays. There's so many options.

"Can I help you find anything?" There was a woman standing behind the counter of the market stall, flanked by crates and other displays. She had long black hair, and a long flowing red dress. She smelled of sweet perfume, and by the looks of it she clearly wasn't from Liyue.

"I'm just browsing at the moment," Chongyun admitted. "But thank you."

Something caught his eyes. A pair of bright colors hung from a rack just behind the merchant out of sight. What's that?

"Um, could you show me what that is?" he motioned towards the item in question, it's figure barely visible sandwiched between a dozen other outfits.

"Sure thing," the merchant removed it from its hanger, and held it up for Chongyun to see.

It was a sleeveless navy blue Qipao dress, visibly altered so the skirt was shorter than usual, with gold highlights and a subtle chest window. "Do you like what you see?" the merchant asked.

Chongyun studied the outfit closely, analyzing its size and contents carefully. It's the right size and color for him, he blushed. It's beautiful really, graceful even. But it's a girl's outfit…

"Um yeah, it looks great," he admitted. If Chongyun was being honest, he liked it a little too much. He felt embarrassed to even be browsing the item.

"So who's the lucky girl?" the merchant asked with a smirk, leaning in with interest.

"Well…" Chongyun didn't have time to come up with an answer. Thing is… "It's a little embarrassing to talk about."

She smiled, "I understand, I get customer's like you all the time. Guys looking to get a gift for their girlfriends and mistresses that will spice up their love lives. I think it's quite romantic, personally."

Wait, is she enjoying this? Chongyun noticed her body language was odd to say the least. The way her head was tilted, the way her eyes and body were focused. "Right, hehe." This is awkward. "So how much for the outfit?"

"Ten thousand Mora."

Should I really buy this for him? Chongyun argued with himself.

"Mmmmm? Still deciding?" the merchant perked her head. "Perhaps the price is too high?"

"It's not that. Mora isn't an issue for me," Chongun sank his head. "I just feel guilty buying something like this." Would I be doing it for him, or just for myself? He couldn't help but think of how his friend would look wearing it. It made him feel selfish, as if the gift was really just self indulgence.

"If it's a gift for someone, and they enjoy it, wouldn't it be a justified purchase?" she argued.

"I guess I'm not really sure they'd enjoy something like this."

"You'd be surprised. I like to think of buying a new outfit as an adventure in itself," the merchant made wide gestures with her hands, and spoke with great enthusiasm. "You never know how you, or someone else, may enjoy it. But sometimes the experience alone is worth the shot."

He thought of Xingqiu. How quirky and absurd he could be at times. His warm inviting personality, and sense of humor. Indeed, his friend had a diverse array of interests, and loved to try out new things. Maybe it's worth a try.

"I'll take it." Chongyun spoke, handing her the Mora.

"Thank you for your business!" she exclaimed, placing the dress in a paper bag. "But tell you what, you're a new customer and you seem pretty conflicted. If your friend doesn't like this outfit, I'll let you pick out a different one if you return with this one."

"That's generous of you, thank you," Chongyun nodded. "Have a good day."

He walked away from the vendor at a brisk pace, charting his way through the thick crowds. Deep in thought and worry. Here's hoping everything goes well tonight.

"Lot's of new arrivals," Xingqiu studied the market square with a keen eye. "I don't recognize most of them."

That explains the crowd, he thought to himself. Indeed, there were more people gathered in the Commerce District than normal. A teeming mass of individuals from all walks of life; wealthy noblemen and peasantry, foreign travelers and landed gentry.

Despite the crowds, from where he was standing he could pick out most of what was there to see. At the center of the market Xingqiu was poised to browse whatever his trained eye could see. Not a single book shop, he sighed. "Oh well."

He turned to depart, carefully moving away from the incoming and outgoing crowds. Their movement was steady, rhythmic even, a natural order to the flow of people in Liyue. But there was something, someone, on the far edge of the crowd parting it aside rapidly.

Xingqiu could hear a familiar voice shout, "Sorry! I've got to get through!" I know that voice, Xingqiu turned to face its direction. Yun Yun!

The sound of the voice grew nearer and nearer. It was heading straight towards him. Wait, I'm not ready to see him yet, Xingqiu could feel a slight panic creep over him. What am I going to say?!

Chongyun emerged from the crowd quickly, almost colliding with Xingqiu. He paused, frozen a few inches away from his friend, carrying a paper bag and a shocked expression on his face.

"Xingqiu?!" Chongyun tried to regain his composure. This is bad, he thought to himself.

"Oh hey! What are you doing here Yun?" Xingqiu asked, running his right hand through his hair. Just stay calm and be direct, he assured himself.

He can't see what's in the bag! Chongyun's worries began to grow. "Oh, not much. Just doing some gift shopping." He chuckled nervously.

"Oh a gift, what is it?" Xingqiu asked, tilting his head.

Oh Morax, why did this have to happen now?! Chongyun shifted his gaze away from Xingqiu. He found it was difficult to come up with something to say when his friends' eyes were locked into his. "I—it's an outfit."

"Yeah, I think I can recognize the brand logo on your bag there," Xingqiu pointed out, studying the paper bag closely. "They're registered with the Commerce Guild like most of the vendors here."

Chongyun gulped, "Oh yeah?"

Xingqiu nodded, "Foreign Outfitters, they specialize in importing exotic clothing and other trinkets. Although I have to admit, I never thought you'd be the one to shop there, what's the occasion?"

"Oh? Why's that?" Chongyun could feel a cold sweat coming over him. Does he know?

"Well Yun, Foreign Outfitters are a women's clothing vendor," Xingqiu explained. "And they stock dubious outfits to say the least." He tried to dance around the subject as best as possible, it wouldn't be right to put his friend in the spotlight in public. "So who was this gift for again?"

A number of possibilities came to Xingqiu's mind. Maybe it's for Hu Tao? Or Xiangling?

"It's for a friend," Chongyun said.

"Which friend?" Xingqiu's curiosity was growing.

Think, think. Chongyun didn't know what to say, "I-It's a surprise."

"Ok?" Xingqiu raised his brow. "But for who?"

Chongyun remained silent.

"Will you tell me what it is then?"

"No!" Chongyun shook his head.

Yun's acting strange again, did I do something wrong? "Then at least tell me who it's for?"

Chongyun blushed, and shifted his gaze back into Xingqiu's eyes. Embarrassed, he muttered, "It's for you."

Wait what?! Xingqiu's heart fluttered. "That's sweet of you. But now I really want to know what it is."

"You'll find out tonight," Chongyun admitted. "At the hot spring."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

"Now I can't wait!" Xingqiu wrapped his arms around his friend in a tight hug. "I'm sure we'll have lots of fun tonight."

"Yeah, I'm sure we will," Chongyun's nerves began to die down. Phew, he thought.

Xingqiu shifted his gaze and footing, giving Chongyun some space. His cheeks flushed a soft red, and his heart began to race. Just be more direct, he thought. "Listen, Yun, there's something else I've been meaning to talk to you about."

Chongyun felt his body temperature rise, his muscles and shoulders tightened. "What's that?"

Just be more direct. Xingqiu took a deep breath. He glanced at their surroundings. The crowds hadn't died down, and there were several bystanders staring at them. Their gazes made the whole situation that much more uncomfortable. Xingqiu felt the whole world was watching them, holding them down with the weight of its judgements and perceptions.

"Um, maybe I should wait till tonight to talk about it," Xingqiu admitted, backing away from his friend.

"That's ok, do whatever you feel is right," Chongyun said.

For a few moments they stood apart from one another, debating internally what to do. Neither Chongyun or Xingqiu was sure what to say, or where to take the conversation. Both of them were embarrassed, albeit for different reasons, and both of them found it difficult to navigate what they were feeling. It was a mix of anxiety, and excitement. A mix of overwhelming uncertainty and a profound sense of hope for the future.

"I'll see you later tonight!" they shouted in unison. The timing of their responses only served to make them more embarrassed around each other.

They nodded and waved to another, before exiting the market in opposite directions. Unsure but excited for what their evening would bring.

Author's Update:

Hey, thanks for reading! It means the world to me. Moving forward with this fanfic I will attempt to make additions on a bi-weekly schedule. Although this will probably be really loose publishing schedule seeing as my primary attention is focused on completing my other ongoing fanfic. However, I expect chapters and additions to this fanfiction to vary greatly in terms of length considering the nature of the narrative. In addition to these notes, if there's enough interest I may choose to write lemon chapters, which would be uploaded as separate from the main story and listed under a different rating. This is all assuming enough people have an interest in scenes like that, and if the fanfic continues to grow. Thank you again for reading, and I hope you have a great day.