Such a Lot of World to See

Love of my life?!

I felt my eyes bulging out of my head and even worse shortness of breath. I loved somebody? I loved somebody that much that I declared them the love of my life?! I narrowed my eyes at Finn, hoping that he was just joking, "You're not serious, are you?"

Finn shook his head slowly, "Why would I joke about something like that, mate?"

"C'mon, we have joked about even worse things before," I chuckled disbelievingly, "That can't be true."

"It is," Colin confirmed with an assured nod.

"It can't be…" I was still not convinced.

Honor sniffled, "It is, Logan… you loved her… more than anything."

I stared at Honor disbelievingly. If she confirmed it, that can only mean that it's true, she would never joke about anything like that. Especially with me.

"But.. how?" I stuttered, "How could've I claimed somebody as the love of my life in mere two years?"

"Even less than two years," Finn chuckled, "Well, she is a really special girl."

"Special?"

"Yeah, special…" Honor nodded with a chuckle as well, "We all love her."

Okay…

"Well, who is she?" I asked the only logical question I could comprehend right now. I can wrap my head around the fact for the life of me.

At that moment the doctor piped in, "I don't think that this discussion will do you good. You're obviously suffering from a retrograde amnesia caused by your concussion. We will do more tests but you have to keep living your life with as least memories from the past two years as you can. If you keep finding out things that have happened in the time that you're missing, you will just setback your recuperation."

"You're joking!" I exclaimed. What's with this guy?!

"I'm afraid I'm not," the doctor shook his head, "You can ask questions about your everyday and your family and friends can inform you about anything different than the two years ago concerning your living situation and such things but you really shouldn't go digging for lost memories."

I glared at him, "So, how exactly am I supposed to remember the time I lost?!"

"You will start seeing a therapist specialising in this particular area. We will inform everybody close to you about how they're to behave around you, so that you get your memory back sooner," the doctor concluded.

This can't be.

"How long will I not remember?" I asked exasperatedly.

"There's no rule… it could be days, it could be weeks or even months. The important thing is that you follow the rules properly, continue with your life and see your therapist regularly."

"Months?!"

"I'm afraid so…" the doctor confirmed, "You should be able to remember soon. Until then, we will keep your injuries under strict observation, as well as your other functions, just so that we are sure that there's not any specific injury affecting your memory loss."

This is just getting better and better.

"And how long am I supposed to stay here?" I grumbled, hoping for some good news.

"Because of the seriousness of your injuries, our prognosis is a week at the moment. You will be discharged then but you will have to keep seeing a physical therapist for quite a while."

A week?!

"What is so serious with my injuries?" I just remembered that I actually didn't know what all was hurt actually.

"You had a severe concussion, broke your 3 of your ribs, had a collapsed lung, broke your left leg and were bruised all over," the doctor numbered the injuries, "Let's just say that you're really lucky to be alive."

Dear Lord.

"Idiot," I heard Honor mutter beside me and glared at her, "What?!" She challenged me, "You could've died! What do you want me to say?! I almost had a heart attack when Rory called me to get back to New York because you were hurt. We were on our way back from Greece for 36 hours! I'm allowed to call you an idiot!"

I looked perplexedly at her, "Greece? We?" I asked the first things that popped up in my mind and then remembered something else… "Rory?"

"Rory - your girlfriend," Honor stated quietly.

Rory. Hm. An interesting name. Unusual.

"As to we…" Honor continued, "I meant Josh and me," she smiled earnestly, "We were in Greece for our honeymoon."

Honor got married?! To Josh?!

"You got married?!" I exclaimed.

The doctor cleared his throat, "I would advise you to share only things like these - life changing things about the people he already knew two years ago. And don't go too much into detail about any memories. Especially if they concern somebody he didn't know two years ago. I know it will be hard, but it's for his own good. If he starts creating new fake memories now, it will just be harder for him to remember the truth with time," he stated, "I have to go now, but I will be back later to check up on you," he nodded towards me, "Just call me if anything feels off."

"Thank you, doctor," Honor nodded and turned back to me with a big smile, "We got married three weeks ago."

"I can't believe I don't remember it…" I shook my head, "So, he finally found his balls?"

The group shared a look and roared with laughter, obviously about some inside joke. What am I missing?

"What?" I asked annoyedly.

"Nothing, nothing," Colin shook his head, "I just really hope that you remember these past two years as soon as possible."

"Yeah," Finn added, "Whipped Logan is the best. Constant source of amusement."

WHIPPED?! Me? Whipped?

Is this some parallel universe that I wasn't aware of before or?

"Whipped?" I croaked out with honest-to-God fear in my eyes and voice.

Honor laughed then even harder, "Boys, don't mock him!" She scolded them, "Anyways, he wasn't whipped and you are both very well aware of the fact, so don't feed him this nonsense just for your amusement!"

I glared at her and then at Colin who muttered something close to, "Yeah, he still hasn't gotten his balls back," to Finn.

Now I was getting seriously pissed off, "What about my balls?!" People! Some things are sacred to joke about!

Both of my so-called best friends roared with laughter until Colin gathered his wits enough to say, "Let's just say that it was one of your best pranks up to date and leave it at that. You will remember eventually."

Sensing some movement left from me, I looked at Honor to see her getting up and putting her coat on, "Where are you going?"

"I need to go find Rory, it's been a while," she said worriedly, "I need to talk to her, see what we'll do now."

"What do you mean what we'll do now?" I furrowed my brow, "Why would it concern her? I don't even remember her!"

Honor sighed heavily, "And just therein lies the problem… Logan, I know that you don't remember her nor anything else since Sidney but she is your girlfriend and you two are really close. Like freakishly close. And I can't even imagine how she feels now… besides, she can't be at your side now with the doctor's orders, which means that we have to figure something out."

"What is there to figure out?" I pondered, really not coming to terms that I'm apparently in a serious relationship, "Just bring her here and I will talk to her and explain what the doctor had said."

"I don't think that's smart, mate," Finn stated.

"I agree," Honor nodded, "You'll just be an ass towards her and she really doesn't deserve it now. No matter the situation."

"Why would I be an ass?" Seriously?!

"C'mon, Logan, you know yourself. You're frustrated now and you don't know her - you're perfectly aware of how you're going to react. You have probably put her into some bimbo file in your head already and we all know how you talk to them," Honor glared at me disapprovingly.

"Is she?" I asked, "A bimbo?"

They laughed out loud again, "Reporter Girl is the farthest thing from a bimbo imaginable. I don't think she even resides on the same planet as them."

"So? What is it then? If she's not a bimbo that means she's not with me because of the money? Is it the influence then?" There just has to be a reason that I could understand. If only I knew why I was with her, maybe I could understand why I'm supposedly in a relationship, "Are we together because of the Dark Lord? Is it a setup?"

"Our parents hate her, Logan," Honor stated simply, "As for the rest of your questions, she doesn't give a flying cow about the money nor the influence, she has both and she still doesn't care about it."

"Yeah," Finn nodded thoughtfully, than smirked at Colin, "We actually have no idea why she would be with the likes of you."

"It's pretty unexplainable, honestly," Colin agreed.

What are they talking about, for crying out loud?!

"Are you all joking with me?" I glared at all of them.

"No, we're really not…" Honor defended, "You'll see yourself. Just… If I bring her here, please behave. If not for her, then for me. Do it for me. It's not her fault, any of this, and she doesn't need to suffer additionally."

I studied my sister for a moment before relenting, "Okay, Hon, I'll play nice…"

"Thank you," she said with relief, "I'll go find her now, be right back," she stated and left the room, leaving me with the guys.

"Okay, now that we are alone, give me some real information, I beg of you!" I glared at them.

"Dude, we really shouldn't," Colin shook his head, "It will just make things worse."

"C'mon, you guys know me better than anybody, I just need to wrap my head around this somehow," I shook my head, "I mean, the last thing I remember was that I was fucking my way through Sidney and now you tell me that I am in a committed relationship? How in the Hell am I supposed to comprehend this?!"

"Mate…" Finn sighed, "It's a really long story and we shouldn't be telling you this. You should just believe us when we say that you really love her, or did love her, in this case, and that she's definitely not some random bimbo."

I frowned at his statement. It always creeps me out when Finn gets this serious and it always means that he really is serious about what he's saying. Hm…

"But what is so special about her that I would commit to her?"

"Honestly… everything," Colin answered, "We can't explain it even if we wanted to. It's like she's your equal, there is no other explanation."

"Equal?" How can a girl be my equal? What does that even mean?

"Col's right, mate, she's really your other half," Finn stated, "She gets you better than both of us together do and that must tell you something."

Huh. Interesting.

"So… how long have been together?" I really need some extra information!

"More than a year now," Colin said simply.

A year?!

"Jesus," I breathed out, "When did we meet?"

"First day of our junior year," Finn answered, "We met her at Branford."

"But we didn't know her before?" I inquired.

"No…" Colin shook his head, "She was a sophomore then. She started Yale when we were on our trip."

I thought about it for a minute, "I just can't believe this…"

"I can imagine, but it is how it is, I just hope that you will remember sooner rather than later, for both of your sakes," Colin stated.

"What do you mean for both of our sakes?"

"Logan, mate, she's like a sister to us…" Finn said softly, "As much as it hurts us to see you here in a hospital bed, it also hurts us when she's hurting. She's one of us from day one basically."

"One of us?"

"Yeah, one of us," Colin confirmed simply.

Hm… How could it be?

Just then Honor re-entered the room, followed by the girl. Rory.

I observed her for a second. Well, she really was beautiful. In a sophisticated, modest way. Kind of shy way. She had long wavy brunette hair and a fringe which half-covered her piercing sapphire eyes. She had s petite slender figure, beautiful curves and pale creamy skin. She certainly was a beauty, no matter anything else.

Honor cleared her throat, "Excuse us, boys, can we just give them a minute?"

What?! She's really leaving me alone with her? I honestly thought that she wouldn't let it happen. Oh well, I guess I should gather my wits and see what was so special about this girl.

Finn and Colin nodded and left the room, followed by Honor and leaving me alone with Rory.

I stared at her for a while longer, waiting to see if she'll speak up. Her eyes were obviously red and puffy from crying.

And then she spoke up, "Listen…" she croaked out and then shook her head, as if trying to focus, "I honestly have no idea what to say… this is all so weird and unbelievable. But you need to get better so I think it's best that I just leave you alone and hope that you'll remember soon," she finished and looked straight into my eyes pleadingly.

I nodded in agreement, "Yeah…" I honestly had no idea what to say next, "I wish I could say anything more to you, but I have no idea who you are," I apologised meekly.

She swallowed down a sob, "Well, this really sucks," she laughed dejectedly, looking down at the floor, "You know what the worst part of this is?" She looked at me again.

I shook my head.

"I begged you not to do that jump but you just had to do it… and now I just blame myself for what happened to you and what happened to us," she shook her head and I saw more tears flowing down her cheeks, "And the absolute worst part is that I can't explain anything to you, can't tell anything to you and it kills me because I tell you everything."

Suddenly I felt really bad for not remembering. And not because of me, but because of her. The feeling was completely selfless. And also the urge to hug her and hold her that followed.

Huh. That's new. Interesting.

"I'm sorry…" I whispered, "But you really shouldn't feel bad about all of this, nor feel that it's your fault. I know how stubborn I can get when I decide something and there is not a team of therapists with tranquillisers that would've stopped me from making the stunt if I had already decided to do it," I chuckled, hoping to release the tension a bit.

She laughed earnestly now - and it was beautiful. One of the most beautiful sounds I have ever heard.

"Yeah, that seems correct."

"Good," I smiled at her and only then figured that I was actually smiling. Smiling!

Jesus, what's happening to me?

"Listen," she spoke up again, "I will collect my things now and leave, I have some things to do and I really shouldn't be here, as the doctor said," she added sadly, "Your phone is in the nightstand next to you, you can always call me if you remember something. The guys and Honor have my contacts as well, just… please reach out to me if you remember anything, even if it's the smallest thing ever."

"Okay," I nodded, "Seems fair," I eyed her curiously, "But you can stay, you know? I need to know more."

She shook her head, "No, I can't, the doctor advised me that it's not good of me to do so, that it would only set you back."

"C'mon, the doctor is an idiot!" I was really exasperated now - I need some answers! Anything!

"The doctor graduated from Johns Hopkins! He's not an idiot!"

"Oh, please!" I protested, "What does he know?! It can't be bad if somebody told me just what the Hell happened in the last two years! You can't really think that he's right?"

"Butt-faced miscreant," I heard her grumble under her breath as she was packing her stuff in a bag.

What?!

"Did you just call me a butt-faced miscreant?!" I glared at her disbelievingly.

She chuckled, "I can't believe that your reaction is still the same," she rolled her eyes as she looked at me again, "At least your ego wasn't hurt in the accident."

Who does she think she is?! First she calls me a butt-faced miscreant and then criticises my ego!

"I can't believe you called me a butt-faced miscreant!" I exclaimed.

"You'll get over it, as you always do," she waved it away.

I just continued glaring at her while she collected the rest of her stuff.

"Well, I'm going now," she looked at the door and then back at me, "If you need anything, just please call me and I'll be here," she smiled softly, "I really hope you'll get better soon."

"Thank you," I smiled (again!), "And I promise I'll call."

She nodded in gratitude and then shook her head as if she remembered something, "Oh, and I'll leave the key with the guys, so you don't have to worry about it."

Which key?

"Which key?" I frowned in confusion.

"Oh, dear Lord, they didn't tell you…" she rolled her eyes, "Well… we kinda live together. But seeing as it's not smart to continue doing so, I guess I'm moving out."

"What?!" Again - WHAT?

"Yeah…" she smiled sadly.

"Since when?"

"Beginning of school year."

Jesus. I really was (or am?) in a relationship.

Dear Lord.

"You don't have to move out," I suddenly felt even worse, "I'm sure we can figure something out."

"No… we can't," she disagreed, "I have to do what's best for you and that's moving out. Even if it is the absolute worst thing ever, it has to be done to help you get better."

I pondered it for a moment and realised that I was actually agreeing with her. I mean, how can I live with someone I know absolutely nothing about? Even though it would be living with a beauty such as her…

"Then let me at least pay for some other accommodation for you, it's the least I can do," I offered.

"Don't worry about it," she declined adamantly, "It's no big deal, I'll just go live with Paris and Doyle."

"Paris?" I frowned and then a lightbulb flashed in my head and I widened my eyes, "And Doyle?! It wouldn't be the little man running the Daily News, would it?"

She laughed wholeheartedly now, "Yeah, Doyle the Editor. And Paris - my best friend and his girlfriend. Although, I bet you'll wish you never remembered Paris once you do," she giggled mischievously.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, nothing, it doesn't matter now, you'll see in time," her eyes sparkled.

I narrowed my eyes at her, trying to figure out what she was talking about.

She picked up her bag on her shoulder, "Okay, I'm going now," she looked at me longingly, again surprising her tears.

Suddenly I remembered something really important. Logan, idiot!

"Wait!"

"Yes?"

"What's your full name?" I inquired, "I mean, it would only be appropriate if I knew the full name of my supposed girlfriend."

She sighed and approached my bed, extending her right hand towards me, "Lorelai Leigh Gilmore Hayden The Third," she rolled her eyes.

I was hundert percent sure that my eyes fell out of my head but I quickly collected (hopefully successfully) my wits and shook her hand, feeling a bolt of electricity surging through my body.

What the Hell? How have I not felt that earlier?!

And - wait! Gilmore? Hayden? I'm really in a relationship with a Socialite?! I knew that it had to be some arranged shit!

"Stop the wheels in your head, Huntzberger, I can see where you went now," she rolled her eyes, "It isn't as you think it is, you'll find out eventually. I usually go just by Rory Gilmore but you wanted a full name so you got it. Don't read too much into it."

How did she…? This is creepy actually. In a really weird way.

"I just can't imagine that I would ever be dating a girl from the top of Hartford's Society, that's all," I explained.

"Well, I also didn't think I would be in love with the great Huntzberger Heir but life happens, obviously…" she shrugged her shoulders, "But… really, don't give it much thought. It is the least important thing and you'll remember eventually."

I observed her a bit more to see if she was lying to me but she seemed completely honest. Dejected even, uncomfortable with the conversation.

"Okay," I nodded, "I suppose I can trust you."

"Appreciated," she grinned and turned to leave the room.

As she was about to leave the room, she threw a glance at me once again, prompting me to blurt out, "Will you come again? I'll be here for a week more."

"Maybe," she sighed, "I don't want to intrude."

"You wouldn't intrude," now it was on me to roll my eyes, "Just come, please? I want to get to know you. I promise I won't inquire about the past. Clean slate?" I found myself pleading.

Huntzberger!

"I suppose we could try that…" she furrowed her nose, "I'll stop by at some point, don't want to overdo it as the instructions from the doctor are completely opposite."

"Live a little," I goaded her.

She grinned widely at me and her eyes sparkled with something, "Well, if you put it like that…"

I have no idea what triggered her reaction but I suppose it was something good. "Just one more thing - I suppose the guys have the keys to the apartment already, you can keep yours."

"They don't have the key anymore," she blushed deeply, intriguing me, "They did at the beginning but then you revoked the privilege after… let's call it an incident. Or incidents."

"Incident?" Honestly, what had to happen to make me take the key from the guys? We always shared them.

She blushed even deeper, "You should ask them," she mumbled and flew out of the room, leaving me confused by her answer and weirdly aroused by her blush.

The question remains - who is this girl?

After she left, Honor and the guys came back and we discussed some things that had happened in the past two years - like sinking of the yacht at Fiji, the LDB, the Stooges' adventures, Honor's wedding and much more. Unfortunately, they absolutely declined to discuss anything about Rory, obviously eager to follow the orders, much to my chagrin.

At some point in the afternoon, I was taken to have some more tests done and then a psychiatrist paid me a visit and advised me to start with things that are familiar to me, people that I have known from before and getting reintroduced to my everyday life. He advised me not to force anything nor anyone to give me information about my supposed girlfriend, saying that it would only be contra productive. He also advised me to write a journal of the things I think about, what I find out - basically anything that I observe, even from my hospital bed.

She texted me in the evening, after I made everybody go to the apartment to get some proper sleep. Actually, the text arrived under the name Ace. I figured it had to be her. She asked me how I was doing. I felt weird having somebody ask me how I was doing. Caring about me. I suppose I should get used to that as well.

I answered that they still had me hooked up on all possible pain-killers and that I will continue being well as long as it remains like that. It was only when I replied that I realised that I haven't event checked my cell earlier. There were some get-well-texts (of course, nothing from my parents) but nothing special besides that. Actually, there was something interesting - the background photo on my cell. I looked closely at it - it was a photo of Rory and me - it had to be from some ball or a gala event. She was wearing a beautiful deep red gown and her hair tied up and I was in a tux. I was hugging her from behind and looking in her eyes, while she looked at me with her head craned towards me. What intrigued me the most was that I actually looked happy. Like, really happy. And something else - something soft in my eyes, the same as in her eyes.

Could it be…?

My cell beeped with another message, pulling me out of stupor. I opened it quickly to see another message from her, asking whether I had a therapist visit me regarding the amnesia. I answered that he had visited me and advised me to write a journal about everything I find out and everything I observe. She didn't reply after that and I felt a bit disappointed by it. Weird.

The next day when I woke up, there was a dark blue journal on my nightstand, wrapped with a red bow on it, a fountain pen next to it. The leather journal had small rockets imprinted on its covers, the same colour as the journal itself.

There was an inscription on the first side.

In hope that you remember faster.

Yours, Ace

P.S. - Every great writer had a quality fountain pen for their deepest thoughts. Consider yourself honoured.

I laughed out loud at the post scriptum part of the inscription - this girl really was something else.

I weighed the pen in my hand for a moment, observing the journal. Well, if the therapist says…

Dear Diary…

TBC!

(Author's Note: Dear readers! Thank you all for your wonderful reviews on the first chapter, I hope you'll continue so - it always makes me write faster when I get any kind of feedback on my work. I hope that you liked today's chapter as well. Fair warning - starting with the next chapter, the story will be formatted a bit differently - through Logan's diary logs and dialogues with others. There was one other thing I wanted to clear - I am aware that there have been other fics on here where Logan loses his memory after his accidents and, even though I read them and found some of them well written, my inspiration actually came from one short story (which's name I can't remember now for the life of me) in the NYT section "Modern Love". Gilmore Girls' community on here is fairly large compared to some other and it is always possible to have similar storylines from time to time. That's why I have decided from the beginning to make Rory and Logan's significantly different from the one in the OS - you'll find out more in the next chapter.

Until next time, soon!)