Shadows of the Past
Chapter 6
Christine felt much safer with her in-laws. She wasn't the only one solely responsible for the kid's safety and could concentrate on bringing a healthy baby into the world. They treated Rebecca just like they did Katie and Hannah and were anticipating the birth of their next grandchild. For Christine; it was hard to be excited about anything. She missed Mike and now that she didn't have to stress so much about them being safe; she was grieving for Lucas. She was retreating within herself and that was not something Mary Alice would put up with.
"You know; Paul and I lost a child?" Mary Alice said as she shucked corn.
"Mike mentioned it." Christine said quietly. It had been his twin sister and she had died from leukemia when they were ten years old. He didn't talk much about it, but Christine knew it caused a lot of pain.
"When Molly died…I did what you are doing. I got through the funeral, got Mike back into a normal rhythm, and just…gave up. I stopped getting dressed. Stopped cooking. Stopped cleaning the house. All that mattered to me was the fact that my baby girl was dead and nothing could help that. I stopped thinking about Mike and Paul needing help through their own grieving processes. What they were going through didn't matter to me. I was angry and only self involved." Mary Alice continued.
"So, what changed?" Christine asked.
"Time. Realizing Mike still had needs. Paul begging me to just get up and get dressed. It was probably a good year, but it happened. In your case, it can't drag out that long. You have three, soon-to-be four kids depending on you. Mike isn't here to lean on and once he is; he'll have to go through his own grieving process. He will need you to be strong for him." Mary Alice said.
"Its my fault. I shouldn't have sent him to that damn camp." Christine exclaimed as she stood up.
"No, honey. Mike had talked about Lucas going to that camp when you all visited at Christmas. You both wanted Lucas to go and he was so excited about it. You couldn't have known." Mary Alice answered as she put her arms around Christine and hugged her closely. At first Christine fought it, but finally she gave in and let the tears flow. Mary Alice was no replacement for Mike, but she understood what Christine was going through.