Chapter 3: Forever?

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Four Months Later - June

Sonny and Amanda's Apartment - Monday Night

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Amanda, who had just finished cleaning up around the kitchen, poked her head into Jesse and Billie's room. She grinned as she watched all three girls, Jesse, Billie and Hazel, who was clutching her stuffed puppy and sitting on Billie's lap, huddled together on Jesse's bed listening to Sonny animatedly read them one of Billie's favorite books, 'Room on the Broom.'

"Then all of a sudden from out of a pond. Leapt a dripping wet frog with a dripping wet wand. He dropped it politely and said with a croak. As the witch dried the wand on a fold of her cloak."

Sonny passed the book to Jesse and pointed to the portion he wanted her to read.

"I am a…frog as…clean as can be. Is there room on the broom for a frog…like me?"

He smiled and mouthed 'good job' to her as Jesse handed the book back to him and he continued on. "'Yes!' Said the witch. So the frog bounded on. The witch tapped her broomstick and whoosh they were gone! Over the moon and the mountains they flew. The frog jumped for joy and…"

"THE BROOM SNAPPED IN TWO!" Billie, who knew the book by heart, exclaimed excitedly.

Sonny laughed and kept going on in an even more dramatic tone.

"Down fell the cat and the dog and the frog! Down they went tumbling into a bog! The witch's half broomstick flew into a cloud. And the witch heard a ROAR"—he directed the roar to Hazel and tickled her at the same time, causing the smiley little toddler to erupt in laughter—"that was scary and loud…"

Once the story was finished, Amanda entered into the bedroom. She scooped up Hazel, who was reaching for her, into her arms; the little girl then rested her head sleepily on Amanda's chest.

Sonny tucked the older girls into their beds and after a round of 'goodnights,' hugs and kisses, the couple quietly exited the room.

"I can put her down if you want to shower." He said to his wife.

Amanda nodded as she ran her hand through Hazel's loose natural brown curls and kissed her cheek. "Daddy's going to put you to bed, ok?"

She nodded slowly and then turned around to reach out for Sonny, who gently lifted her up out of his wife's arms and into his own.

"I love you." Amanda whispered into her ear. "Night, night Hazel."

She yawned as she waved 'bye-bye' with her free hand, laid her head down on Sonny's chest and closed her eyes.

Amanda watched as her husband carried Hazel into her bedroom, carefully placed her into her crib and started settling her in. She smiled softly and then made her way into the bathroom to shower.

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Two Hours Later…

Sonny and Amanda's Bedroom

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"Have you checked your personal email today?" Sonny asked his wife as he put his cellphone on silent and placed it down on his nightstand.

"Not since this morning." Amanda said as she placed her still damp hair into a messy bun and slid into bed next to him. "Why what's up?"

"Got an email from Family Court. They moved Hazel's hearing up to this Friday."

"Oh." Amanda said flatly.

The two sat together quietly for a long while before both speaking at the exact same moment.

"Manda…"

"Sonny…"

He motioned for her to go first.

Amanda nodded and took in a deep breath. "Back in January when me, you and Liv took the kids out ice skating, her and I had a pretty deep conversation. We somehow got to talking about you and I and what our plans were…family wise. If we were going to leave things as they were or if we would have a baby of our own together."

She paused for a moment to collect her thoughts and then resumed speaking.

"As much as I…thought you should and deserved to be a dad in your own right, I just…didn't really see myself wanting to go through a third pregnancy and caring for a newborn at this age and stage of my life. Then Liv…she made kind of a throwaway comment I'm sure she probably doesn't even remember, but it's one I'll never forget. She told me, 'What's meant to be, will be. One way or another.'"

Amanda took another deep breath and continued on. "I don't believe it was a coincidence that Frannie, who never begs to go out in the middle of the night, led you to Hazel. That YOU saved her. That she struggled with all her other foster families but blossomed under our roof. It's because Hazel belongs with us. When she asks for 'mama' or 'dada,' we're the ones she's looking for. When she gets hurt or upset, we're the ones she turns to for comfort. When she learns how to do something new for the first time, we're the ones she wants to show. Because we're Hazel's parents. She's OUR child. The child you and I were meant to have together. I—I don't want ACS to put her with another family for adoption. I want us to be her forever family."

Amanda bit her lip and looked at Sonny, unsure of what he was thinking as he sat silently for a few moments as he absorbed everything his wife had said. He then took in a deep breath and finally responded.

"Manda, I feel the exact same way. While I'm sure we would've been happy no matter what path we took in life…no matter which way the wind blew, I feel like Hazel comin' into our lives was kismet. I love her so much and I know you do too. She IS the child we were meant to have together. I've felt that way for a long time now. And I really wanted to have this conversation with you as soon as ACS told us that they were stopping the search for her biological family and would be discussin' next steps at this hearing. Because I knew Judge Linden would ask if we would want to adopt her. But while I knew it was what I wanted, I…I wasn't sure if you felt the same. It warms my heart to hear that you do."

Amanda nodded her head vigorously as she let the tears that had been welling up in her eyes fall down her cheeks.

Sonny smiled softly as he gently wiped away her tears, pressed his lips into hers and pulled his wife into a loving embrace.

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Two Months Later - August

Squad Room - Tuesday Morning

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"Look who finally decided to grace us with her presence." Amanda shouted out to Fin as they both watched Kat fly into the squad room and plop down at her desk.

"I overslept." Kat said as she discreetly poked her head into Liv's office and saw her and Sonny engaged in a deep conversation. "Does Liv know I'm late? How long have her and Carisi been talking?"

"A while." Fin said as he took one last bite of his breakfast burrito and tossed the wrapper into the trash can. "I don't think she knows."

Kat nodded and turned her computer on.

Amanda fixed her mouth to say something, but was interrupted by her cell phone ringing and went to answer it. About a minute later Sonny emerged from Liv's office, just as Amanda's phone call ended.

"Hey do you have to rush out?" She asked her husband. "Langan just called. He's faxing over some papers we need to sign."

Sonny nodded and pulled a chair over to Amanda's desk as she walked over to the fax machine and grabbed the documents. She brought the papers back to her desk and the two began looking them over and signing their names on the pages Langan designated.

"More adoption paperwork?" Kat asked.

Amanda and Sonny both nodded in unison.

"It's crazy how much red tape ACS is putting you through." Kat said shaking her head. "I mean, you've been fostering Hazel for so long now. Doesn't that count for something?"

Sonny shrugged. "It's helped the process in some ways, but there's still a lot of steps they legally can't bypass. It'll all be worth it in the end though." He said as he exchanged grins with Amanda.

Fin got up from his desk. "I know we've told ya this before but what you two are doing…adopting Hazel…it's a good thing. She's a lucky little girl to have you two as her parents." He gave Sonny a pat on the back and then headed off to the bathroom.

"Fin's right." Kat told the couple.

Sonny shook his head. "No I feel like we're the lucky ones. Hazel taught us how to be more patient, more understandin'…just overall better versions of ourselves and I'll always be grateful that she entered our lives when she did and that she'll be in them forever."

"Ditto." Amanda said as she smiled over at her husband.

The duo quickly finished up signing the documents and Sonny left the precinct to head back to his own office just as Liv finally came out of her own. She fixed her mouth to say something to Kat when her cell started ringing.

"You got somethin' for us?" Amanda asked once Liv finished her call.

"Not sure." Liv said as she slid her phone into her pocket. "Melinda wants me down at the ME's office. I'll keep you both posted if it turns into anything."

Both detectives nodded as they watched their captain leave the precinct.

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Medical Examiner's Office - Tuesday Morning

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Liv entered into the examination room and closed the door behind her. She looked down at a young, dark haired woman who lied on the table before her

"Narcotics found her in one of those seedy rat motels earlier this morning." Melinda said as she washed her hands at the sink. "I just finished doing an autopsy."

"How'd she die?" Liv asked curiously.

"Overdose." Melinda said as she dried her hands with a paper towel. "Fentanyl laced heroin, I'm assuming, but I can't confirm that until I get the toxicology results back."

Liv nodded. "You found signs of sexual assault that occurred prior to the overdose?"

Melinda shook her head. "No. She definitely had sex, but there were no signs of rape. Looks like it was consensual."

"So this wouldn't be an SVU case." Liv said to her. "Why'd you call me—"

"Because of this." Melinda said cutting her off and handing a document to her.

Liv took it and after reading through the first couple sentences she realized what she was looking at and her jaw dropped. She pointed down to the deceased woman lying on the table. "She's Hazel's mother."

Melinda nodded her head slowly. "I'll have to notify ACS and the juvenile division, since they were the ones handling this case, but I figured you'd want to be the one who tells Rollins and Carisi. Before either of them did."

Liv ran a hand through her hair. "Do you know who she is?"

Melinda shook her head. "No. The only hit that came back when her fingerprints and DNA were entered into the system was as a mitochondrial match to Hazel. The Narcotics unit found no ID on her or in the motel room."

Liv sighed. "So there's no way we're going to be able to identify her."

"There's a chance you might be able to." Melinda said as she looked down at the woman. "When examining her there are a couple little of things I noticed here and there that lead me to believe she might be Canadian."

Liv raised her eyebrows. "Really?"

Melinda nodded. "I would check with the neighboring provinces. Ontario and Quebec. See if her DNA pops up in their databases."

Liv nodded. "I'm going to talk to Lieutenant Jones in juvenile and tell him I'll follow up on this from here. I know you need to contact ACS, but can you wait until the end of the day? I want to do a little more digging into this first."

Melinda nodded.

They both stood quietly looking at the deceased woman before Melinda finally broke the silence. "She's young. I'd guess around 20, 21. Do you think she has parents somewhere out there that have been looking for her?"

Liv heaved a heavy sigh. "Probably. And if she does…they're going to want Hazel. Because she'll be the last little piece of their daughter that they have left. God, if Hazel is taken from Amanda and Carisi…it'll destroy them."