Hey guys hope you are doing well and staying healthy! This next chapter does refer to triggers such as abuse and sexual assault. I thank ya'll for reading and I will be updating more in the next few days so enjoy.

Brax was stressed out. He never handled stress well, and he wanted to find River now to kill him. He heard Mercedes was back but didn't want to reach out until she was ready.

He saw a number and hesitated but eventually answered. "Braxton..."

Joey felt his heart flutter at the sound of the man's voice. "Hey, Brax... it's uh Joey."

"Joey?" he asked, recognizing his voice immediately. "I was just thinking about you."

"You were?" He smiled. "I was worried about you. I wanted to make sure you were okay...Mercedes is back."

"I was worried about you." He couldn't stop thinking about Joey, and that scared him a bit. "I was hoping I could see you soon?"

"Can you...you can come here. That way you can see me and see that she's fine...I can't drive, or I would come to you."

"Did you check with Sam's mom? I... don't know where you guys are.*

"She is really nice, and she won't mind. I can text you..." He looked at the ground. "I miss you."

He paused for a moment. "I miss you too."

Joey smiled. "I really like you, Brax, and I am thankful that you are in my life."

"I really like you too," he smiled. "I think I was meant to find you.*

"Me too. I think I was meant to find you too."

He smiled. "I look forward to your text.*

"I will see you soon...and I think it will do good for Mercedes too. Her stepmom is worried."

"See you soon..."

Joey smiled, hanging up and sending Brax the text. Then, he walked back into the house and went to his and Stevie's room so he could change.

Mercedes started screaming. She hadn't even been aware she fell asleep, but River was in on top of her right now, holding her down. She cried out, swinging her arms.

Sam never fell asleep. He was enjoying the feeling of Mercedes in his arms. When she started screaming, he immediately let go. "Mercy! Wake up!"

Mercedes eyes widened as she looked over to Sam. "I am so sorry. OH, Sam." She frowned, snuggling into him, tears falling. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. It's okay."

Sylvie ran into the room, worried sick. "Mercy?"

Mercedes watched as Sylvie, Joey, and Mary ran in, and she was even more embarrassed. She just wanted to cry; she curled up in a ball ." I'm sorry...so sorry."

Joey moved to her side. "Merce, it's okay; it gets easier."

Sam held her close. "It does," he agreed.

Sylvie put herself on the other side of Mercedes and rubbed her arm.

Mercedes tried to relax at the soothing voices. "I don't deserve you all." She sniffed. "Hi, Joey."

Joey smiled. "You are one tough cookie Mercedes."

Sam and Sylvie did their best to calm her.

"She is one tough cookie," Sam smiled.

Mercedes swallowed. "Thank you." She glanced back at Sam. "How long did you have the nightmares?"

"I still have them..." he admitted.

Joey exhaled. "Me too.."

Mercedes frowned. "I don't want to be like this..."

"It's normal to be like this. They'll fade slowly."

Mary moved closer to the bed. "You aren't alone in this; they are right. It will fade, and all of this will feel like a dream itself. It's easy to give up and let the darkness in, but you three are strong, and we are here to support you. We may not have much, but we have that."

Joey looked at Mary. "That is more than enough."

Mercedes sighed, still in Sam's arms.

Sam nodded in agreement. "You have us."

Mercedes took a deep breath before sitting up. "Can I...can I help... I don't want to stay here taking up all of your space and not do something."

Mary smiled. "It's tight, but we manage, and we can manage you too."

Mercedes sighed. "Sylvie, I know you have to get back; I don't want you to leave, though."

Sam sat up with her.

Sylvie shook her head. "I'm here until you want me or us to home."

She laid her head on Sam's shoulder. "I bought a house...a few weeks back. It's big enough for everyone and close to my dad... Is it... is it too much for you guys to move there?"

Mary smiled. "Dwight and I talked about your offer and knowing how much you and Sam need each other, how now you really should be with your family... we are willing to go..."

Sam didn't know about that. He looked at Mercedes, his brow furrowed. "Really?!"

She looked at him. "6 Bedrooms, 6 bathrooms, and a Mother in Law suite that will give someone space. "She sniffed. "If you have a computer, I can show you guys."

Joey bit his lip. "Me too?"

Mary walked out and came back with a tablet. "Will this work?"

Mercedes nodded, grabbing the tablet and smiled at Joey. "You are family too. It's close to my dad's...the house across the street from you guys Sylvie..." She pulled up the beautiful home and showed Sam first. "I just wanted us all together, and now...now I am too scared to be away from all of you."

Sam had tears in his eyes. "Mercy..."

Sylvie couldn't believe this either.

Mary looked at it. "This is...this is so beautiful... Are you sure you want to do this?"

Mercedes nodded. "Please guys...please let me do this, take my mind off of everything?"

Sam nodded. "Yes, of course..."

Mary nodded too. "Yes...I still can't believe you did this."

"You guys have been separated for so long I know you don't want to stay that way."

Joey wiped his eyes. "Thank you for including me."

Sam slowly stood up and walked over to Joey and Mary. "We're together... *

"The house is big enough for all of us, your siblings, everyone," Mary said softly.

Mercedes bit her lip. "I also have jobs for you guys...the house is paid for, and it will be stocked, but I know you guys want to work too...and Sylvie, do you think we can help Stevie and Stacey with school?" Mercedes liked talking about helping. It took her mind off of everything.

"That's too much, Mercy..." Sam whispered.

Mercedes closed her eyes. "Guys, can I talk to Sam, please..."

Mary nodded, walking to the door. "We will be outside." She said as Joey walked with her.

Sam slowly sat down on the bed. "What's wrong?"

Once everyone was out, she closed the door. "Sam...before I went in, I bought the house, so I knew that you guys would be safe, but now...I am not strong enough to do this alone."

Sam was trembling slightly. "I understand."

She leaned against the door. "You do?"

He nodded.

She bit her lip. "I think for now I want to stay with my dad..."

"I get it, but... I want to stay with you..."

Mercedes bit her bottom lip. "Sam..." She closed her eyes.

"What?" Did he say something wrong?

Mercedes took a deep breath. "Do you understand what being with me like this means? I know you say you love me and that I am who you want. But I was broken when I came here, and I still am, but at least I am clearer...I might have a lot of issues, or I could be...worse..." She was rambling; she couldn't stop.

He furrowed his brow. "You accepted me with all my problems. I don't know what you mean by worse..."

"What I went through, did they do that to you all the time? Rose, River, Jericho?"

Sam sighed. "River and Rose did. Jericho mostly went to Joey...he came to me only a few times, and I was blindfolded with him...he never touched me. He just let me listen to Joey's screams...but now I know it was a recording..."

She closed her eyes; they had all been through so much...and right now, she needed to know...needed to see if she could ever feel normal again. "Kiss me..."

Sam nodded and leaned in, kissing her as gently as she could.

His lips touched her, and she frowned, pulling away. Would she never be able to feel anything again? "No, I mean, kiss me, Sam...please really kiss me. I need to know if all I am gonna feel his... him..."

Sam nodded. "Okay..." he exhaled before kissing her. He was still gentle but a bit more passionate.

She froze at first, but then she felt it, the same feeling she got the moment she felt Sam's lips the first time, and tears welled in her eyes. Maybe she wasn't so broken after all. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer.

Sam moved even closer and kept kissing her when she pulled him close. This made him so happy.

She pulled away for a moment and placed her forehead on his. "Sam...I was so scared. Scared that it would feel different, be different. That he ruined me for you."

"No..." he whispered. "He could never ruin you for me."

"Do you mean that? Mean that no matter what he did to me, that I'm not ruined?"

He nodded. "You're still perfect to me.*

She leaned in and kissed him deeply, running her hands through his hair and pushing her tongue through his lips, needing to forget what happens and just get lost in Sam."

And Sam let her. For the first time, he wasn't wholly submissive in the kiss. He loved this moment.

Mercedes let herself be in that moment giving all of her Sam wanted to take freely. She was his at that moment. And she moaned in enjoyment as her body fell against the door.

Sam smiled into the kiss, allowing it to break naturally. He grinned and rested his forehead against hers.

She bit her bottom lip staring up at him. "Sam..." She didn't even know what she wanted to say; she just wanted him not to let her go at that moment.

"Yeah?" he asked, a bit breathless.

"Can we stay like this for a while?"

Sam hesitated when he felt her move a bit. "It's just me..." he whispered.

She nodded. "It's you, Sam... it's you." She put her forehead on his, "Keep going."

He nodded and started moving his hands up and down her sides. "All me..."

She bit her bottom lip, and her shaky hand moved his hand up to her breast. "Look at me, Sam...please."

Sam looked at her as his hand cupped her breast. "As you wish."

Her eyes stayed on his as he did. "Thank you, Sam... don't stop."

"I won't..." he whispered.

She let her head fall back while still looking at him, it was helping, and that's what she needed.

Good. He was so glad about that. "I love you..." he whispered against her neck.

When he went to her neck, she let off a moan. "Sam..." His hands and his mouth were heaven.

Sam kissed along her neck. "Yes, love?"

She bit her bottom lip. "Feels good...so good."

"Good..." Sam continued.

"Sam, please keep touching me." She begged.

Sam did that. He continues letting his fingers dance along her skin.

"You are making me weak on the knees. Can we lay down?"

"Of course..." he whispered.

She swallowed hard, moving them to the bed. She pulled Sam on top of her, staring up at her. "Wait... I just...I want to make sure you are okay with this..."

Sam hesitated when she pulled him on top of her. But he looked down at her. "Just touching..."

She nodded. "Just touching, I don't think I can do more..." she said honestly.

"Me neither..." he admitted as he ran a hand up and down her side.

She looked away from him. "Because...because he had me?"

"Because I'm not ready for more..." he whispered.

Mercedes wasn't sure she believed him, but she didn't want to push it.

It was the truth. He wanted to touch her, but the more removed he became from the Elite, the more the sexual things made him anxious.

She leaned up, taking his lips in hers, kissing him but opening her eyes every few moments to make sure that it was Sam touching her, kissing her.

Sam kissed her gently. He loved her and this.

She moved his hands back to touching her.

And he did just that. He used one hand to balance himself.

She ran her own hands over his abs. "Am I still yours, Sam? Am I still yours like you said?"

"For as long as you'll have me."

She smiled, moving against him. "Yes..." She arched into his touch. "I wanna feel loved, wanted, needed." she pleaded with him.

"Tell me what to do..."

She nodded, moving to take her sweatshirt off and leaving her in a tank top and bra. "Touch my body, feel me. love me..."

Sam nodded and did as she asked. "I love you."

She closed her eyes. "I love you too, Sam...so much. You can.. you can kiss my neck again, I love that,"

He smiled and kissed down her neck to her collarbone.

This was what she wanted to feel, something she hadn't last week, something no one else could do. She guided his lips to the top of her breast, wanting to feel his lips all over her, dying to forget.

He did as she guided. He wanted her to feel loved and happy. "As you wish."

She ran her hands through his hair, feeling him, his lips, his hands; it was building her up, taking her higher, and she needed that. "Please, Sam, I need more.."

Sam smiled and moved his kisses between her breasts and down to her belly button.

She moaned through closed lips trying to keep her mind focused on Sam. "You are so sexy Sam, you make me feel so good."

Sam hesitated for just a moment before kissing back up to her lips.

She ran her hands down his chest, moving her legs between his thighs.

Sam let out a small gasp and kissed her neck again.

"You like when I touch you?" She asked nervously.

All he could manage was a nod.

"Do you..." she swallowed. "Do you want to touch each other..."

He hesitated for a moment before kissing her neck. "Not today... please..."

She nodded, pulling away from him with a small smile; she knew, knew that he didn't want her. She grabbed her sweatshirt, forcing a smile. "I should get going." She said softly, moving from the bed.

Sam reached out and took her hand. "So soon?"

She let him take her hand. "I don't want to push Sam.."

"But... you just got here..." Did he do something wrong?

She couldn't leave even if she wanted to; he made her feel safe even if he didn't like her in her mind. She moved to sit back on the bed.

Sam sat next to her and rested his head on her shoulder. "I need you."

"What do you need, Sam?" She asked, linking her hand in his.

"You... just here with me..."

She nodded. "Okay," she replied softly.

"Did I... did I do something wrong?"

Mercedes bit her bottom lip. "Sam, I just really needed something, and I can't get it right now, so I just need a moment."

He bit his lip. "I'm sorry."

She shook her head. "No, it's okay. I...we need two different things right now. And I am just lost right now, but it's not your fault."

Sam couldn't help it. He started crying as he looked away from her.

This is what she didn't want. And now she upset Sam and made things worse. "I'm sorry, Sam! I didn't...please don't be mad at me. Please, Sam."

"I'm not mad," he managed. "Not at you..."

"I get it, Sam." She said softly. "You love me, I know you do, but it's too much... this is too much to ask of you."

He was trembling. "Right now... yes. I'm sorry I can't make you feel better."

Mercedes shook her head. "No, it's me. I just wanted to forget, but it's not possible. I deserved all of this. And you deserve better. You need to find better Sam."

That pulled a pathetic sob out of him. "don't say that. please don't say that."

She moves from the bed. "I hurt you, and I didn't want to. I never want to hurt you. But this is too much for you. Why would you want to kiss me? Touch me. Why would you want me...he said you wouldn't. And he was right."

He looked up at her, tears falling. "That's not it at all..."

"Sam, you are amazing, and I am...I am pathetic. So it's okay. It's fine, you will find someone better. Someone who deserves a guy like you. I can't be what you need. I'm nothing."

Sam was shaking. "That's how I feel... like I'm... I'm not worthy of you. That I can't... give you what you need because I'm so fucked up."

She looked at him. "You are everything, Sam, can't you see that? See that I need you. But I don't deserve you. Not when he took everything from me."

He shook his head. 'You're wrong. I don't deserve you. You in all your perfectness...*

Mercedes angrily stood up. "Perfectness? Perfect? What's so perfect about me, Sam? Was I perfect when he forced me on my knees? Was I perfect when he used me for 24 hours then left me to die in a cage? How is that perfect!"

Sam actually cowered away from her. "You... you... m-might not see it... b-but I d-do."

She hit the wall then slid down it, tears falling, "My sweet little Vixen, you smell good, taste good, feel good. That's a good pet." She repeated disgustingly. She hit her head against the wall. "Sam won't want you anymore. Not now, not now that I had you. He won't want you. He will hate you." she hit her head again. "slut, whore, my little pet is such a naughty girl."

Sam curled up for a moment until she slammed her head against the wall. He got down off the bed and sat next to her. "Mercy... Mercy, come back."

"Look at me, Vixen. I want you to know it's me! Scream louder, fight harder now; one will help you! No one wants you," She slammed her head again. "No one loves you." slammed it again, wanting all the memories to leave.

Sam put his hand behind her head. "Mercedes... please come back..." he pleaded.

Mercedes didn't register Sam's hand. Instead, she just kept repeating what River said to her. "He won't leave my head. He won't leave."

"I'm here, Mercedes..." he whispered, taking her hand. "He can't get you here."

When Sam took her hand, she looked at him and was brought back. She stared at him for a long time. She was messed up; he shouldn't have had to deal with her trauma along with his. It wasn't fair.

Sam kept eye contact and offered her a smile. "Welcome back..." he whispered. "Do you need any Tylenol? I think your head might hurt."

It was then she realized her head did hurt. She didn't look away from him, but she didn't speak either.

"Maybe some hot chocolate?"

She continued to stare at him, trying to find the words to say.

"With marshmallows? Maybe some caramel?"

"I'm worthless..." she finally said. "You deserve better than to have to deal with my trauma on top of yours." she finally spoke, barely above a whisper.

"Stop," he whispered. "Don't call yourself that. We're gonna make it through this together."

She finally closed her eyes, letting the tears fall. "Sam... I'm broken beyond repair..."

"No, you're not."

She held up her wrist, showing his brand. "I scrubbed and scrubbed, but it won't come off. So he owns me Sam...he owns me..."

Sam looked at her wrist and took a deep breath. "He doesn't own you..."

"It does...he owns me. He owns me..." She frowned. "I am nothing...nothing."

Sam took a shaky breath. "You're something to me. You're someone to me... to your dad and stepmom and Livi... to Brax and Joey and my parents and Stevie and Stacey... you're Mercedes Jones..."

Mercedes looked at Sam, stared at him silently for a long while. "No, I'm not...Mercedes died, she fought, fought hard, but it wasn't enough...never enough."

His heart broke. He didn't know what to say. How could he convince her?

She looked away from him. "I'm not worth your time...not anymore."

"You always are... always will be," he murmured.

She closed her eyes and saw River, wiping her eyes, she looked at him. "I gotta go...I should go..."

"Okay..." he whispered, sinking down to the floor.

"You deserve better, Sam; you will see. You will see that I'm nothing."

Sam shook his head but didn't verbally respond.

She slowly stood, fell wobbly on her feet. "You are going to move into that house, and then you will move on, find someone worthy of you."

Sam still said nothing. He didn't want anyone except Mercedes, but there was no way to convince her of that.

Mercedes walked out of the room and back to the door. "I am ready to go." She said, wiping her eyes and heading right to the car. If she didn't, she would fall out right there.

Sylvie ran after her. She was horribly confused about what happened.

Mary looked after Mercedes and rushed into the room to find Sam. "Sammy?"

Sam was curled up on the floor. He had his hands over his head as he cried.

Mary walked over to him and pulled him into her arms. "Sam? Sammy, what happened?"

Sam curled up and sobbed in his mother's arms.

"Sam, talk to me. Please."

"She hates me... she's so... she's so far gone, and I c-c-c-can't save her."

Mary shook her head. "She doesn't hate you, I am sure of it. I know it. But right now, she is going through so much." She kissed her son's forehead. "You are all going through so much."

Sam couldn't stop shaking. "My fault... all my fault.'

"Sam, stop it. This is not your fault. She loves you; I can see it. I know it. But she's lost." Mary rocked him. "You just need to give her time."

"My fault," he murmured again.

"Not your fault. None of this is your fault." She held him. "Sam, you are loved. You are strong; none of this is your fault. None of it."

Sam continued to shake in his mother's arms. "Let me go," he whispered.

"No! No, I will not let you go. I can't." She said firmly.

"Okay," he whispered, his breathing finally evening out.

"I got you, Sam. I got you." She said, rocking him back and forth.