This chapter was specially difficult for me to write. Did it turn out okay?

Devil's on your shoulder

Strangers in your head

As if you don't remember

As if you can't forget

It's only been a moment

It's only been a lifetime

But tonight you're a stranger

Some silhouette

Aquilo, "Silhouette"

58. 'SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW'

He's the first to clap when she finishes her rendition of 'I dreamed a dream', turning heads from the front row where the director and producers of the play are evaluating her audition.

Caroline glares at him and promises to make him pay for this later if she doesn't get the role.

"It's hilarious that you chose that song, the tears in your eyes and everything. It would really fool anyone who doesn't know you don't have feelings anymore."

"It's called acting, Silas. I thought you were quite familiar with that form of art."

He's followed all the way from New Orleans after she vamped away. The bastard put a tracker on her. Sometimes she wonders if he's still a witch, but of course he is, that's the only reason the other bothersome faces aren't knocking at her door yet.

"Why don't you just compel them to give you the role you want? Much easier."

"That's not fun. I want to be chosen for my talent."

"From what I've heard, you must be the most peculiar vampire without humanity."

"Shut up."

They stop walking as they reach the café that's two blocks away from the hotel. Caroline is starting to like this place, you cannot have something this good in Mystic Falls (oh, the things she's been missing by imprisoning herself to a person).

But it's good to have something pleasant to look at while she enjoys her newfound freedom. The last time she turned it off and got Stefan to do the same, they also had some fun for a short while. But as she cannot risk listening to him and going back to the wreck she was before, so it's fitting that Silas is her partner-in-crime now. One who's much better, mind you, as he doesn't just go killing people and dragging her down to do it either.

"I know you are a fossil, but tell me, have you had any time to learn how to dance?"

He's got a smug look on his face.

"Caroline, please, I'm naturally talented."

She rolls her eyes.

"Good boy," she makes sure the bite mark isn't very noticeable and fixes the neck of his shirt, "now go home. You drank too much and this never happened."

"This never happened. I'm just drunk."

"Exactly."

Of course when she goes back to the afterparty, Silas has something to say about her habit of using the handsome guys from the crew as meals. Mostly because she used to be more discreet about who she targeted.

But that was then, when she didn't fully realize what living in a big city meant: freedom to go under the radar and get away with things she could never get away with in a town where half its population is involved with the supernatural.

"Did you have fun?"

"You should try it sometime."

"Ah, drinking blood… don't really need it anymore." He smirks, "but I got this."

He shows her some flashy keys and she raises an eyebrow.

"Who did you steal it from this time?"

"I did not steal it. Your director's friend gave it to me. A very generous man. He's also invited us to stay at his villa in Toscana."

He has this weird thing about collecting cars that, of course, he gets from messing with people's minds, so that's stealing in Caroline's book. Not that she cares, of course. Besides, you've got to use your advantages in life.

"I'm bored. Let's see this new car then. Oh, that girl over there? It's Lisa, of the stage crew. She wants your phone number but she's too shy to ask for it. Please go reject her or sleep with her, because she's annoying me."

He just laughs and shrugs it off. How can a guy who looks like that and has been imprisoned for two thousand years not want to get laid? Caroline doesn't need to read minds to know what he really wants. But she's not interested.

She only keeps him because he's the only one of the three that doesn't even tickle her (nonexistent) emotions.

Talking about that…

They get into the car (a Porsche this time, how predictable) and she throws her phone through the window.

"What, you finally got tired of not answering the phone? Why did you keep it for so long then?"

It's been four weeks since the incoming calls from Bonnie, Elena, Matt, Tom, and Stefan started. Tom and Stefan were the most persistent of them. Now it's only the latter who keeps calling, and shouldn't he know she's not going to talk to him?

Honestly, it's pathetic.

As it turns out, her life is much better when she's not involved in problems that shouldn't be hers: no original vampires trying to kill someone else, parents hating her for being a vampire or dying on her; no boyfriend who might or might not want to play martyr today, not weird witches forcing babies into her womb, not jerk shoving on her face the fact that those babies aren't hers every time they disagree… Wosh, why was she such a pushover?

Humanity is overrated.

In the end, she's the one who kisses him first. Maybe it was just a matter of time. They are having fun, and he is hot (there's no denying that).

But as the kisses get more heated and they reach the door of her room (eyes wide shut, walking backwards), Caroline realizes her mistake.

She sees flashes of all the other times she's done this with someone who looks like him, but isn't.

It's just a second and Silas crashes against the opposite wall. He growls.

"What's wrong with you now?"

Keeping him is dangerous. She curses at her own fragility. She curses at Stefan Salvatore, and how easily she's triggered by the same old memories she knows by heart. It's a thin line she's been walking on, and it can't go on like that.

"It's not going to happen. It's been fun, but I think this is the end of our two-people adventure. Bye."

She turns her back on him and walks out of the suite, but then pain drums in her ears, her vision becomes blurred, and she falls to the floor.

"Do you think it works like this, my sweet, sweet Caroline?" Silas kneels next to her and looks her in the eye. "I'm not someone you can just push around however you like it."

"Ugh! Just stop!"

"What's the magic word?"

"Stop! Please!"

"That's better." He smiles, apparently satisfied, but she's still dizzy when she struggles to stand up.

"For all you pretend to care, deep down you're the same insane man who left me to cut myself in a dark storage room. Peace, you? Who are you trying to fool with that? You are not capable of being a good person just for the sake of being a good person, so just drop the mask, Silas."

His left hand is on her cheek.

"You're right. These weeks have been fun. I didn't need to share you with all those annoying, boring friends of yours. But if someone is going to turn me down, I prefer it's the real you."

Forest green eyes dig into her mind, and Caroline feels him prying into her most private memories again.

"I still need you."

Her mom dying in that hospital bed, trying her best to smile in spite of the pain. "You are an extraordinary woman, Caroline. I know you'll be alright."

And she turned to look at Stefan. "Promise me you will take care of her."

"Always."

Stefan's arms wrapped around her shoulders...

Always? Pure lies.

She grabs the hairpin that's holding the messy bun in her head, and stabs him in the hand, which gives her just enough time to vamp away.

This time she's not letting anyone turn her emotions back on.

What do you do when you're a vampire who probably has at least two powerful witches tracking you down? Move often and fast, for sure. It's a shame Caroline has to wave goodbye to her stage actress aspirations (for now). They will stop looking after a couple of years at most.

Meanwhile, she visits the places she likes the most. In this life she hasn't had the chance to travel much, and in the previous one, it was always about the school, or about the twins.

She used to visit the Lago di Como when she had time for short trips, though. Those visits ended with her crying silently and depressing over the losses in her life, so she never enjoyed this place as she should.

This time is different. There's nothing to taint a magnificent experience.

Caroline takes her time to read the menu, sitting at a nice spot with a view of the lake.

Someone sits on the chair across from her.

"Care."

Ah, her morning is ruined. It's definitely not her lucky day.

"I had a feeling you would come, but it must be my lucky day" he says, a soft smile on his face and his hand trying to reach hers over the table.

She dodges him and stands up.

"How did you find me?"

She has barely been here for a day. How did he arrive so quickly?

He shows her the diary. Ah, she had the stupid habit of writing about every flash of memory as they came. There's so much wallowing in misery in those pages that's no surprise if she ever mentioned coming alone to her would-be honeymoon spot.

"Reading other people's journals, how rude. A normal person would take the hint, Stefan. It's over."

"You turned it off."

It's not something she needs to answer at all.

"Caroline," he's on his feet too, his hand grabbing hers tightly. She stares at this point of contact for an instant before shaking him off. "I cannot let you do this to yourself."

"Do what? I'm doing better than ever before in my life, Stefan. It turns out I don't need any of you at all. I especially don't need you."

He flinches as if the words physically hurt. She smirks.

"It was a mistake letting you go on your own, Caroline. We're in this together, I'm not going to leave you."

"Duh, I wonder where I heard that before?" She laughs, and takes a fork to stab him in the neck. "Just leave me alone."