Back to normal…kind of:
Sorry for the long wait but here's a nice long chapter =)
Jane woke up to a giant bodle of water, two Ibuprofen, and a note: Drink me (with a little arrow pointing to the pills) Enjoy your day off. Dinner tonight? I want to take you out :)
Jane smiled looking down at the note. Maura is so fucking cute she thinks. Her head is throbbing. Memories of the previous night come smashing into Jane's mind like a sledgehammer making contact with concrete.
She cringed as she brought her hand to her forehead. I made such an idiot of myself. She probably thinks I'm a moron now. Singing on the lawn like that. That's it: I am never drinking again.
Fuck. Does dinner mean sex afterward? Are we there yet? Is it technically our first official date? God, I want to but what if it's bad… for her? Ugh! Jane falls back to the bed and instantly regrets the sudden movement. Her head was pounding even worse now.
Her phone rings and she grunts in annoyance. Who would be calling on a Saturday? Everyone knows a Saturday off is beer, Nachos, and game day.
Work. Great. "Rizzoli". They need her to come in, there's a high-profile case and the department is swamped. At least that'll take her mind off dinner with Maura. She knows she would have just obsessed over it all day if she didn't have to work.
The day goes on and Jane and Maura don't even have time to say two words to one another. Jane is slightly relieved at this. Maura went with the body and Jane had to talk to the family with Frankie since the victim was the District Attorney's son.
Jane finally made it down to the morgue in time for the autopsy results. She stands by the door and takes a breath, preparing herself. She's nervous, this is the first time she would speak to Maura after her shenanigans the previous night.
Even though Maura found it adorable and enduring that Jane came to her house and finally opened up to her. Though it took an unsettling amount of alcohol for the detective to do so.
Jane was feeling embarrassed and she wasn't quite sure how much she told Maura.
She knows she cried. That was already enough for Jane to want to change zip codes. She knows she sang like an unhinged individual because her voice is barely holding up today. And she knows she kept telling Maura how much she loves her. Barf.
Jane pushes the door open and tries to shoot Maura one of her confident smiles as she walks over but it comes out as a sly smile with an apologetic look.
"Hi there. How are you feeling? Did you drink all of the water? Alcohol dehydrates the body quite a bit."
"I'm fine, thank you, doctor. What do we got? Cause of death?"
Maura is taken aback by the uncharacteristic professionalism. Jane is speaking to her like they're merely colleges? Even if they hadn't confessed their feelings… kissed, they're still best friends. Where's the banter? Where's Jane? Did she even read my note? Maura thinks as she looks at Jane with a slightly confused look.
"Jane, is something wrong?"... "Why would you think somethings wrong? I told you I'm fine Maura... A little Gatorade and I'll be right as rain" Jane says just trying to get the focus back to the case before they start talking about the previous night.
She could have really used a day off right about now. Being around Maura after the previous night is not just awkward for Jane but the worst part is that Maura doesn't seem to get it. Get that Jane is embarrassed or even why she would be.
"You seem… a little closed off, that's all". Jane huffs. Now she has to spell it out? Can't they just talk about the case?! "Ugh…Maura, I am a little on edge after last night ok, can we please just focus on the case?"
"Oh," Maura says, a little sad that Jane isn't even acknowledging that there's something between them. She hasn't seen her all day and she doesn't even greet her properly? She wasn't exactly expecting a good morning kiss, although Maura would not object to that, but Jane just came in with that weird look and started asking about the case.
Maybe it's because we work together and she wants to compartmentalize? Should we lay down ground rules? Maura thinks for a bit too long and Jane starts fidgeting under her gaze.
"I don't quite understand why you would be embarrassed. You were very sweet, Jane. I've never been drunkenly serenaded before." She says ending with a dimpled smile.
Jane opens her mouth to respond but only smiles back at Maura. Jane can't help but feel increasingly anxious around Maura. Even more than before. All she wants to do is not screw up the most incredible thing that's ever happened to her but she can't think straight around the ME.
"Cause of death is suffocation." Maura takes her through the autopsy results as they walk to her office.
"Would you like some quinoa, kale, and yams?" Maura asks sweetly as Jane comes to stand in front of her desk. Jane doesn't see the assorted healthy foods on Maura's table but instead notices that Maura is not wearing panties today. With a skirt that tight…she's got no secrets.
"...Sure… wait what? No…when I'm a contestant on survivor maybe. I gotta go, Maura, let me know when you have the tox screen results." Jane says as she hurries out of Maura's office.
"Wait! Jane… what about … our date?" Maura says the last bit to herself softly, staring in the direction that Jane left in so abruptly.
Jane throws herself into her work. Where they had no leads and no witnesses, she managed to find two leads and even a suspect. She grabs her Jacket and motions for Frankie to follow.
"Wow, you up for promotion already?" Frankie asks innocently from the passenger seat as he watches his sister swerve through traffic.
"What?" Jane huffs, not taking her eyes off the road. "It's just. You're working like crazy and driving even more so, actually, you mind slowing down?" Frankie says as he pumps his imaginary brake and holds on to the handle.
"Oh." Jane looks down at her speedometer in disbelief. "Is this because of Frost? You can tell me you know. You haven't really been yourself since". Jane clenches her jaw. He means well but right now, the last thing she wants is to talk about what's got her so wound up.
"I'm fine. I had a… weird night-" "-Ooh" Frankie interrupts excitedly. "-I don't wanna talk about it! So just… I'm fine. I mean- I'll be fine. Ok?" Frankie looks at her with wide eyes and surrendering hands. "Ok. I hear you. I'll bud out… If you don't wanna talk to me you should at least talk to Maura about-"
"Can you please just… Ugh!" Jane all but drifts the car into a space in front of the suspect's house eliciting a loud yelp from her passenger. "Oh look we're here. How about we quit yapping and go do our jobs!? Why am I the only one that wants to do my job today?" Jane exclaims as she gets out of the car.
Frankie pries his hand off the handle and exhales. He knows his sister and she only gets like this when there's something big going on. Something she feels she has no control over.
The lead turned out to be a dead end. The suspect had a solid alibi. Jane stares at the files on her desk and sighs. "Anyone needs me I'll be at the range" she says as she holsters her gun and walks out.
Korsak looks up to say something but she's by the elevators already.
No matter where she goes or what she does, Maura keeps invading her thoughts. She used to be so collected and confident even though she was attracted to the doctor but ever since that first kiss in the theater, things have been very different.
It's like it amplified the effect Maura had on Jane by a hundred! She reloads her mag for the fifth time before emptying it out on the target again. Her finger is forming a small blister where the trigger is squeezed against it.
"There you are." Maura says as she holds a folder closely. Jane takes off her protective wear and places her gun on the table. She can't help but make a face as the metal makes contact with her blister as the gun leaves her hand.
"Bullous lesions on the index manus." Maura says as she reaches for Jane's hand. Jane looks up at the ceiling defeatedly and sighs. "Brilliant deduction. Got the results back yet? Was he drugged?" She asks hurriedly as she brings her hand back from the delicate grip of the doctor.
Maura watches Jane closely. Her heart rate is definitely increased. Am I making her anxious? Interesting. Maura thinks and decides to have a little fun. "No, it would seem he was intoxicated. 3.5 times the legal limit." She says as she moves very slowly toward the detective, her hands holding the file. Her gaze, fully on Jane.
Jane backs up but is trapped by the shooting booth behind her. She swallows as Maura's arm brushes hers. "Ok, so he was… half in the bag when he was strangled… Maybe he was at a bar?" Jane manages to say as she moves a shaky hand to get her phone but Maura's proximity makes touching her accidentally, inevitable.
Jane freezes. Her hand is suspended halfway to her belt. Why is she so close? "Do you… like my blouse? It's new" Maura asks not so innocently. Janes eyes shoot down to her blouse and back up to Maura's gaze in a split second. "Yep. It's a… nice one. Pretty color-"
"-Hmm and this perfume? I haven't worn it in a while. Thoughts?" Maura says as she moves even closer, exposing her neck to the detective. Jane's whole body goes stiff. She grips the metal table behind her and forces a polite smile as she inhales.
Jane might as well be 3.5 times the legal limit as well as she closes her eyes and takes in Maura's scent. It's so subtle yet completely intoxicates Jane. Oh for the love of Peet why me!?
Jane has never considered taking anyone right there at work like she is contemplating right now.
Her mind is racing to everything she wants to do to Maura and she could feel herself losing control. She grabs Maura by the waist and backs her up against the metal divider behind her. This cannot go on she thinks.
Maura's eyes go wide and she starts breathing heavier. "Maura!... Your perfume smells very nice. It's too bad we have a case cause I could just stand here and smell it all day. Is that what you want me to say!? Gah, what is happening to me?" Jane mumbles the last bit as she lets go of Maura and moves to holster her gun.
"If that's what you mean to say, then yes. Just talk to me. You are avoiding me, Jane. Tell me what you're thinking, at least." Jane runs her hands through her hair frustratedly. "Oh god, you sound just like Frankie! Will the two of you just stop already?!" Jane exclaims a little louder than she intended.
Maura gets a furious look that Jane has only seen once before. "Fine! I will. I'll stop everything. It's like chasing a bewildered chicken anyway.-" "-Excuse m-" "-Shh! And you know what!?" "Did you just shush me?!" People are starting to peak over the dividers to see who is yelling so loud.
"You drive me crazy!-" "-That's rich! I drive you crazy. Maura, I am at a point where I need a day between every day to recover from the day before… just so I can prepare for the coming day!" Jane says fast and sloppily.
"That wouldn't make mathematical sense to have that many days Jane!" At this point, people around them are starting to become invested. "Is that what everything comes down to for you?! Maths?"
Jane doesn't even give her a chance to answer before apparently telling the doctor everything she's been feeling… except not the stuff that actually matters. "Well I'm sorry you have to find out like this but I was always shit at maths." She says with her arms in the air. "I was never…ever… good. And I don't care…I don't… give… a crap." she says simply.
"Algebra was a mystery to me… 1 A plus 1 B? You can't count letters?-" "Jane" "Unless of course… I was absent… the day we did the B times table. You know, one B is B, two B's is a couple of B's, three B's is a couple of B's plus the one we spoke about in the first place. Four B's are two couples of B' where was I going with this?" Jane says a little out of breath.
"There you go again, Jane! You deflect and make me feel like I'm alone with my feelings. And it hurts!-" "-Wait Maur" Jane says with her hands suspended in the air. She could hear the hurt in Maura's voice. "I wish what happened in that theater never happened!" Maura says coldly before turning around and strutting away furiously.
Jane could feel her eyes burn with the tears forming. She's frozen in place, watching the door that Maura left out off. She replaces her heartbreak with anger like she always does. She can understand anger, not whatever else she's feeling at this moment. It feels like her heart was on the target that she was shooting at earlier.
She lets out a loud swear word and walks out. People are staring from the long stretch of shooting range, it's never been so quiet in there before. Jane hardly notices.
Maura closes her office door and leans against it. Tears stream down her face, it's a more welcome sensation than the itch from the hives forming on her neck.
Maura has never felt so strongly about anyone. She's never cared about anyone enough to be this angry or hurt by them. Even when her own parents would fail her and break her heart, when she got older it stopped hurting as much. Like she was used to the pain to such an extent that she wouldn't cry or even really be upset anymore.
This, however…stung. Badly. She has never cried at work. She actually can't remember the last time she cried. She tries to piece it together. Where it went so horribly wrong? How could she go from finally having the woman of her dreams to yelling at her that she didn't want them to have told each other how they felt? That was the best day of the ME's life if she's honest with herself.
How could Jane go from professing her love, twice!? To being so cold, distant, and then so angry? If only this were something she could analyze under her microscope for answers. We can't be friends anymore, can we? Not after that certainly, Maura thinks as she sobs softly. Her hand covers her mouth seeing as her lab techs are working away a few feet from her door.
This is foreign territory for Maura. She moves away from the door and sits behind her desk. Her heartbreak now replaced with fury.
The day comes to an end and neither one gets much sleep. Maura has tried every breathing technique, had three cups of 'calming' tee and even ate sugary pastries that she does not approve of. The ache just doesn't fade and the anger only builds.
Jane tired herself out on the punching bag. She doesn't even remember the drive home from the gym. Yet when she closes her eyes in her bed, her tear ducts act on their own accord. She's always gotten angry as she starts crying, even as a little girl.
"Gah what now!? Lost the woman I'm in love with and screwed up my friendship with my best friend… probably forever. Can this day get any worse?!" Jane yells into her empty bedroom right before the fire alarm to her building goes off.
"Some moron decided to start cooking before falling asleep on the couch and burned away half his kitchen in the process." The fireman says to Jane as they move back into the building. He asks for her number and she wants to tell him 'no' but a small part of her thinks of what Maura would do if she found out she was seeing a sexy fireman.
She's never been one to string anyone along but he'll bounce back, she knows his type. She gives him her number just because… what else could go wrong she thinks…
Jane walks to the crime scene the next day, exhausted and not sure of anything. "Hey Jannie.-" "Don't call me that" "Body's down there… Listen you know I don't listen to scuttle bud but there's some chatter going around the precinct that you and the doctor had a bit of an argument yesterday at the range."
"Wasnt much of an argument. She did most of the… sensible talking" Jane says between closed teeth. She's mostly angry with herself at this point. She hurt Maura. She knows that. the irony is that that is the last thing she wants to do. "Ok, well if you ever wanna talk, about anything… I'm here kid" Jane's expression softens. He's always been there for her, since day one. "Thanks, Korsak."
Jane comes up to Maura talking with Frankie beside the body. "Hello… detective Rizzoli" Maura says coldly. Jane sighs and moves to the other side to create some distance. "Hello, doctor Isles."
This is stupid. Were both adults, she's an MD for Peet's sake. Why is this feeling so much like junior year of high school? Jane thinks as she shifts her focus to the case. "Well I don't see any drag marks"
"No, levity confirms she was killed here"... "She's in workout clothes, what was she doing here?" Maura moves her hand over to gesture to the wounds and says condescendingly "She was strangled" Jane looks at her with a fake smile. "Thank you, doctor, I can see that… Looks like the weapon was a garrot" "Gerggot" Maura corrects.
"Gee, I would love a history lesson on the gergggot wouldn't, you Frankie?" Jane asks while pulling a face. Maura identifies the sarcasm for once but chooses to answer out of spite. "Well it was most popular in the 17th century when it was used as a means of silent assassination by the Thuggee cult in India"
Jane stands and smiles at Korsak and Frankie who are just staring wide-eyed. "Well, let's be on the lookout for the Thuggees" Frankie can't take it anymore and pushes the focus back to the body. "What are those red patches?"
"Urticaria" Maura states simply. "Urticaria?" Jane asks. "Oh uh. Maybe you'll know what this means… the yucky red stuff is a rash" Maura says with a searing stare. Jane is fuming. She has never seen Maura so condescending.
She doesn't have an evil bone in her body. This is a whole different Maura. A fiery Maura. To add to the situation: Jane still can't get the thoughts of her and Maura… together… out of her head. Even as she's annoying the living daylights out of her right now.
"I thought that was a… a good explanation," Frankie says "Me too" says Korsak. The atmosphere is so thick you could cut it with a knife. "Let's go" Jane says, not breaking eye contact with the doctor. Maura jumps up and grabs Korsak. "You stay" The look in her eyes says she means business and Korsak doesn't dare move.
The day goes on and Jane and Frankie are going through footage of the location where the victim was found. In comes Maura behind Korsak. She starts telling him her results instead of Jane. She rolls her eyes at Maura and crosses her arms.
"... I've narrowed it down to 7 lakes in Massachusetts" Maura says with her file in her hand, Korsak just nods. "Are you saying those lakes are polluted?" Jane asks. "I'm not. The ph levels and mineral content, are" Maura says snippily. "Swell, our Sprout troops used to have camps at one of those lakes,".
"You were a Sprout trooper?" Maura asks in disbelief. "Yesss. Why is that so hard to believe?" "You mean because it is your duty as a Sprout trooper to be kind, friendly, generous..?" The nerve Jane thinks. "I was so sweet and kind, I won sweetest camper… two years in a row so hahaha".
"Was anyone else there?" Maura asks slyly. Jane turns with an 'oh you did not just go there' face. Korsak and Frankie's eyes go wide. Maura notices the stiffness in the atmosphere. "...To watch you, accept your… award?" "Nice recovery," Jane says sarcastically.
"That's where our Vic was driving" Frankie says. "That's a small needle in a big haystack." Jane says. "I'm going there and doing my own water quality testing," Maura tells Korsak. He gets a devious look on his face and looks over to Frankie as if they are on the same wavelength.
"Hey, doctor Isles. Since your going anyway could you get a statement from Mattew Moore?" Jane stomps over "Oh! You can't have a medical examiner get a statement, that's my job" she says angrily. Had she put her focus anywhere other than Maura she would have caught on to their little plan.
Frankie chimes in. "Hey, you two can go together?". He and Korsak just want the weirdness to end and things to get back to normal asap. The two women look awkwardly at each other and then away. "I'm sure she's taking a different route" Jane says, softly.
"There's only one" Korsak adds. "You're right. I am. I have to go get a few things." Maura says with a smug smile as she leaves the room.
Frankie looks at Korsak defeatedly. Korsak is not giving up, he takes out his cell. "Hey, Mo it's Korsak…"
Oh for fucks sake- not today! Jane thinks as she sees Big Mo tow her cruiser along with Maura's Prius. "Hey!-" "-Ho! What are you doing to my car!? I park here everyday Mo" "Oh not today, have a great rest of ya day, alright"
The women stand there for a moment before Maura takes out her phone to rent a car. Jane follows her lead. Both of them try to out- stubborn the other. Jane's mother comes out with lunch for the road.
"Ma we're grown-ups! Did Korsak put you up to this?" "If you're such a grownup then act like it and stop this!.-" Maura's expression softens. She always did have a soft spot for Mrs. Rizzoli. Frankie pulls up with a big grin. "Just saw Big Mo towing your cars. Wanna borrow mine?"
"Oh, you're good" Jane growls as she looks at him with narrow eyes. "One little thing for your mother and you cant do it?" Angela keeps pressing. "It is more energy efficient if we take one car" Maura says defeatedly. "Fine but I'm driving" Jane says as she moves to the car.
Always so controlling, hard-headed, sarcastic… Maura thinks of everything about Jane that drives her up the walls. "I am not listening to Led Zeplin" "I'm not listening to Yo-Yo Ma" Maura gets a dramatic look across her face. "I don't listen to Yo-Yo Ma-" Jane looks at Maura like she knows she's lying and will soon be covered in itchy hives "… in the… car" the doctor adds.
"Oh, that's right.. Pardon me. Yo-yo Ma is just for the Jakuzi. Put your seatbelt on!" Jane exclaims in annoyance as she pulls away. "It's on!" Maura snaps back.
Only 24 minutes into the drive and they are both properly annoyed. Maura, the meticulous navigator, switches Jane's music to something a little slower. "The acoustic vibrations of hard rock have been been shown to increase the risk of an accident"
"Really that's weird because with this music Ima bout to cha cha cha real smooth off the fucking cliff-" "-Language!" the phone rings and it's Angela. "Hi, are you girls having fun?" "Oh yeah, great fun. Maura's playing the annoy the uncaffeinated detectives game again and I'm starting to lose hearing in my left eye!-" "-That's not poss-" "-Oh for the love of Peet stop!?" Jane growls before Maura can get all technical.
"Have you guys listened to the audiobook yet? It's in the cooler" Angela asks with her usual budding tone. Maura searches and finds the cd. She 'reads' aloud just loud enough for Jane to hear."Uh, What to do when your former best friend is a stubborn, apathetic bitch." "Really?" Jane asks dryly.
"Too bad it's wet" Maura says as she holds the Friendship cd between her fingers. They say goodby to Angela and Jane is well worked up. "I'm a bitch!? Were you semi-conscious at the time you told me you wished I never told you how I felt? You don't think that hurt?"
"You're the one trailing me along, Jane. Not telling me what you're thinking or feeling. Not telling me anything actually, avoiding me altogether!. Acting like we're no more than colleagues! Did you even get my note this morning? Were you having doubts is that it?" "No! And it's string someone along- which I was not doing"
"That's all you have to say?!" Maura asks with a darkened stare. Jane does not recognize that tone which tells her she needs to tread lightly. "No! look Maura can we please talk about this when I'm not driving. You know one minute you're on the road looking at the scenery, next minute you're in the scenery looking at the road."
Jane could feel Maura's eyes searing into her side. "I'm glad you think you're so funny" Jane wants to leave it their she really does, but that just wouldn't be Jane Rizzoli. "Well, I'd rather be funny than Poindexter the Know it All." Maura gasps.
"Well, I'd rather be Poindexter the know it all than the Hoi Polloi" Jane pulls a face. "Good one Maura" Maura shifts in her seat. "You don't even know what it means" "Classy. Hide your insults in Latin"
"It's Greek!" Maura exclaims. "Oh, the Geek that knows Greek. Do you hear how ridiculous you sound? You know people laugh at you behind your back?" "Really well they call you a bitch behind yours!" Maura is so furious at this point although she's not quite sure whether she wants to jump Jane's bones or break them.
Her studies on makeup sex are not as extensive as she would like. Although anger is a sign of passion. "Don't miss the turn I don't wanna be in this vehicle with you any longer than I need to be-" "-Likewise!" "Just go past the carnivorous spruce!" "Maybe I'll pass a hemlock too. Oh look a Homosapien- Oh crap in a guard booth."
Jane says as she shifts uneasily. Luckily they came in Frankie's personal car. "Love and light" "Love and light. You here for the couples retreat this weekend?" The guard asks looking at them expectantly. "Yes" Jane says, not missing a beat and smiling.
"K what're your names?" Jane stays calm and smooth-talks him. "Our names may not be on your list. We just descended." Jane places her hand on Maura's thigh and the doctor has no poker face. This roller coaster is not her scene. She smiles politely as Jane's hand remains on her thigh.
"Today in fact" Jane says, still smiling widely. "Oh. Well unless you have your double platinum soul certificate, I can only allow you to go as far as the public picnic area," he says with a sad face. "Oh. Well, we understand."
He opens the gate and Jane drives in. "Jane we are not here for the couples retreat! We didn't bring any clothes, they'll know!" Maura says as she starts breathing heavily. "Ok stop that. All we have to do is get the sample and speak to Sensei Mata. We'll be in and out. Relax Poindexter" Jane teases.
I know I changed a lot about the original episode but how fun would it be if they were to attend a couples retreat, undercover while everything is going on? =-)