A/N: Before you read this chapter, I'd just like to personally apologize in advance to the entire population of Germany. I truly do not mean any offense, I just find your language really, really funny.
"So who exactly is this Doctor?" MC tried, wanting to get at least some kind of last-minute prep before she came in.
"Someone exceptionally skilled in her field." Monika answered, smiling proudly. "She has a near perfect track record, curing her patients from just about anything. The absolute best that money can buy!"
"That's awesome!" Sayori giggled, turning to smile at him. "You hear that? She'll easily be able to fix you up again, lickety-split!"
"Right…" MC said, attempting a smile that probably didn't work.
He wasn't even entirely sure if he wanted to hear whatever verdict this Doctor would have on his… condition. On the one hand, it could be something easily fixed in a matter of minutes if he was lucky. Like, exceptionally, ludicrously, unrealistically "Dream Speedrun" lucky.
But on the other hand… if this was something far more serious, and the Doctor couldn't find a cure that easy despite Monika's assurances, or in the worst case scenario, there wasn't a cure at all?
How would he be able to live like this?
There was another knock, louder and more insistent this time.
"Someone should probably go let her in." Yuri said, looking just as unwilling to exit the bedroom as the other girls, who all turned to stare at her.
"Yuri…" Monika said, awkwardly. "This is your house, remember?"
"Oh, right!" Yuri exclaimed, her face lighting up in embarrassment. She hurried across the room, and disappeared through the door to let in her guest.
Natsuki frowned at Monika.
"Maybe you should have gone with her? You know how Yuri gets around strangers."
"Ah, she'll be fine." Monika waved her off, and MC could tell she was intent on remaining by his side. "Doctor Cynthia is one of the kindest, most patient women I know, they'll get along famously."
They heard the faint sound of Yuri's front door opening, immediately followed by a sharp female voice with a very distinct, European accent.
"Ach, endlich! Took you long enough, do you not think I have better things to do than freeze to death out here?!"
Yuri's voice was barely intelligible, consisting mainly of nervous stuttering.
"A- ah, I'm s- sorry, I d- d- didn't mean t- to-"
"Oh, der Mund halten, I can't stand listening to your yappering. Where is Monika and the patient?"
"S- s- she's i- in, uh…"
"Mm-hm, I see. You are an useless one, are you not? All the fat must have gone from your brain and directly to deine Brüste!"
"You were saying, Monika?" Natsuki commented, raising an eyebrow at the Club President. Monika blushed.
"Uh, Dr. Cynthia?!" She called. "We're in here!"
Heavy footsteps could be heard, rapidly approaching the bedroom. A dull, wooden clunk on the floor accompanied every other step taken.
Then, the Doctor entered, and MC could feel his heart sink to the very pit of his stomach.
He wasn't sure where Monika got "kind" and "patient" from in her description of the woman. The main words that came to his mind upon looking at her was more along the lines of "old as dirt."
Thin, white hair was bound in a very tight bun at the back of her head, and heavy wrinkles completely littered every available surface of her face, making her cheeks sag and giving her the appearance of an angry, old bulldog.
She wasn't very tall, partly because she was leaning over, using a thick, knotted cane to support herself. But even if she could straighten out her back and reach her full height, MC very much doubted she would be that much taller than Sayori.
He stared at her in quiet disbelief, an expression echoed by Natsuki and Sayori.
The old woman looked around the room, scanning each of them in turn with beady, black eyes. When she noticed Monika, her face seemed to light up into a horrifying, wrinkled smile, showcasing obviously fake teeth.
"Ah, Monika!" She exclaimed gleefully, and hurried over deceptively fast for someone her age to catch the girl in a mighty bear hug, without stopping for even an instant to acknowledge his, Sayori or Natsuki's presence.
"Cynthia, it's so good to see you again!" Monika said, eagerly returning the hug with a genuine expression of love on her face, seemingly completely unbothered with being so close to what mostly resembled a reanimated corpse.
"Mein Gott, I haven't seen you since our last checkup!" Dr. Cynthia said. "It's been too long, I tell you!"
"Sorry, Nanny." Monika giggled. "I guess I've just been too healthy these past few years."
"Here, let me get a proper look at you." Dr. Cynthia said, breaking the hug to inspect her appraisingly, reaching up with a wrinkled hand to run her fingers through Monika's long, brown ponytail.
"Ach." She said, seemingly overcome with emotion. "You've grown up to be a very fine, young woman, the spitting image of the mother I delivered you from. Oh, how I miss her and your father."
"Same." Monika smiled. "But they seem to be doing well in Germany."
"And you're certain we still can't convince you to move there as well?" Dr. Cynthia asked, hopefully.
"Cynthia, I've already told you why I can't." Monika said. "All my friends are here in America, I can't just abandon them."
Behind them, Yuri hesitantly re-entered her bedroom, face glowing scarlet as she nervously pulled her hair, trying her best to hide behind it. Despite her efforts however, Dr. Cynthia spotted her immediately, and pointed a grubby finger directly at her.
"You really need to acquire better servants." Dr. Cynthia said, her voice hard again as she squinted at Yuri. "I was hardly able to get a single word out of this Schwachsinnige!"
"S- servant?" Yuri asked, her face going even redder.
"Okay, everyone!" Monika announced, before Dr. Cynthia could retort further. "Allow me to introduce you to Doctor Cynthia! She's been in my family's employment for as long as I can remember. Whenever any of us would get sick, all we needed to do was speed-dial her and she'd be there within moments, ready with a miracle cure. Doesn't matter when, doesn't matter where. When it comes to short notice emergencies, nobody has Cynthia beat!"
"Damn right." Dr. Cynthia nodded, smiling in satisfaction.
"Alright, so we've learned your origin story, hurray." Natsuki said, clearly irritated. "D'you think maybe now we can finally move on to the part where you check whether or not MC is crippled for life?!"
MC couldn't help but flinch at Natsuki's words, brutally reminding him that this outcome was indeed a possibility.
Then, the old woman turned towards him and he suddenly had a much more pressing concern as she reached out towards him with her spotted, claw-like hands.
"Ah yes, the patient." Cynthia said, making contact with his face without further ceremony. "Well then, let us have a look at what we're dealing with, ja?"
MC suppressed a shiver as he felt her cold hands groping around his facial area, feeling every available surface, stroking his chin and pinching his cheeks. He wondered for a brief moment if she was in fact legally blind, and this was the only way for her to get a feel of his appearance.
"Ah, a fine specimen you managed to catch for yourself, Monika." Cynthia stated as she continued poking and prodding him. "Good taste in men, your mother would be very proud of this choice."
"Thank you." Monika said, moving to Cynthia's side where she smiled at him as if all this was completely normal behavior. "I'm quite happy with him myself."
Cynthia's hands moved to his mouth where she, without warning, pried open his jaw. With his head firmly locked by Cynthia's surprisingly strong hands, MC could only look meekly at Monika for help. She just winked at him, playfully.
"Oho! A strong jawline, dentures and overall healthy physique for a boy his age." Cynthia said approvingly, releasing her death-grip on his face and allowing him to close his mouth again. "My my, quite a catch indeed. Shame about the haircut though."
"Hey!" MC interjected.
"Yeah, that part's still a work in progress." Monika shrugged. "But I'm confident I can convince him to get it cut before Christmas."
"If you're both done drooling over his 'amazing' body now," Natsuki spoke up again. "perhaps you'd like to move on to the reason you're actually here? Y'know, the part where MC can't fucking move?"
"I am not sure if I approve of your current servants." Cynthia frowned in Natsuki's direction, whose face was lit up in anger. "They seem rather disrespectful."
"I'm not a fucking servant!"
"I know, right?" Monika said, looking like she was enjoying herself way more than she should be. "But maybe it is about time to inspect his condition now?"
Cynthia nodded, leaned down to grab hold of the blanket covering MC and ripped them off without further ado.
MC tilted his head downwards, noting to his eternal shame that he was quite a bit more exposed than he would've liked.
"Wh-" He croaked hoarsely, and cleared his throat. "Why am I only wearing my boxers?"
"Oh, I, uh," Yuri spoke up, her face scarlet as she avoided eye contact. "W- when I p- put you in here, I, uh, r- removed your clothes. I- I was worried about y- you becoming t- too hot wearing them. S- sorry."
"Oho!" Cynthia exclaimed more excitedly this time, her black eyes drifting downwards to take in the contours of his torso. "I now see another reason you picked this boy. Ach, you'd never guess just by looking at his face, would you?!"
Her eyes lingered for an uncomfortably long time near his crotch area where the tight, thin boxers really didn't do that good a job of hiding what lied beneath.
MC desperately wished he was able to move his arms and cover himself up, but of course they remained unresponsive by his sides.
He really didn't like this. While he'd reached a level of intimacy with Monika where he was comfortable with her seeing his body and vice versa (most of his time with her ended up with both of them unclothed anyway, the visit earlier today being one of their tamer examples) he wouldn't say he'd quite reached the same level with the others yet, despite them being his quote unquote "girlfriends."
This wasn't really that surprising since Monika had never been one for taking it slow with anything in her life, seizing what she wanted the moment it became available to her. This was how she'd acquired her driver's license so much sooner than the others. Sayori, Yuri and Natsuki in comparison preferred to build a slower, more traditional connection before moving on to the other kind of stuff, which was perfectly fine with him.
One day he was sure he'd reach the same point in his relationship with the others, but it most likely wouldn't be today. Especially not with Cynthia being in the same room as them.
"It wasn't really a conscious decision." Monika shrugged, drinking in the sight of him as well, not a trace of shame on her face. "Never knew what he was really packing under there before we started dating. It was an unexpected, although obviously very welcome bonus."
"Indeed." Cynthia said, smirking as she kept looking him up and down. "With a tool like that, I have no doubt about the healthy next generation you will provide your family's legacy with!"
"Can we please move on to the part where you help him move again?!" Natsuki said, looking possibly even more embarrassed than him while keeping her face staring resolutely into the ceiling. "I'm almost certain you talking about him like that is highly illegal in some way."
"Y- you look awesome, MC!" Sayori said, giving his cheek a friendly poke, trying and failing to make this situation less awkward.
"Very well." Cynthia said, prying her eyes away from his body, and grabbed hold of his foot. "Let us inspect the damage, ja? What's your name, mein Kind?"
"Uh… MC." He replied, tentatively keeping watch on whatever the woman was planning on doing with his foot.
Cynthia frowned.
"MC? What is that, some kind of acronym for your real name?"
"I've been thinking about that too!" Sayori said. "My headcanon is that it stands for 'Mr. Cuddles!'"
"I'm partial to 'Main Character,' myself." Monika smiled. "Since he's easily the most important person in my life."
"You're both idiots." Natsuki added dryly.
"It's just… MC." He said, neglecting to comment further.
"Ach, millennials." Cynthia shook her head, and returned her attention to the limb in her hands.
She shook his foot experimentally, making his entire leg wobble.
"Well then, MC. Do you feel any of this?" She asked, ceasing the shaking.
"Uh… no." He said, truthfully. Although he could clearly see her hands gripping his foot firmly, he didn't feel the same cold touch as he had when she'd played with his face. "There's… nothing, it's completely numb."
"Hmm." Cynthia grunted, moving on to make similar tests on his other leg as well as both arms, with identical results. She briefly paused, scoffing under her breath when seeing the four pale scars on his right arm, but thankfully neglected to comment further on the sight.
"Any ideas yet on what could be wrong?" Monika asked.
"Hundreds, thousands." Cynthia replied, reaching in to the large pink purse dangling by her side to pull out a small, black box. "Further testing is required to narrow down the cause."
She flipped open the lid on the box, and procured a thin, shiny needle from inside.
She held up the tiny object to inspect it closer, making its sharp, metal tip glint brightly in the light of the room. Then, she positioned it right by his hand.
"Uh…" He said, feeling very uncomfortable with how close it was to him now. Despite all of the time spent in Yuri's company, sharp objects still managed to cause him a great deal of anxiety. "W- what are you d- doing with ah!"
He couldn't help but gasp loudly when Cynthia without warning inserted the needle directly into the palm of his hand.
"Are you okay?!" Sayori gasped, concerned.
"What the fuck are you doing to him?!" He heard Natsuki's angry yell from behind as he watched Cynthia's needle protruding from his flesh.
"Merely testing the limits of his apparent numbness." Cynthia replied, squinting her eyes as she stared at him to gauge his reaction. "Did you actually feel the insertion?"
"Uh…" MC said, finding it hard to focus. The shock of her action had been so great that he couldn't remember actually feeling the pain. "…I'm not sure?"
"Let us try again then," Cynthia said, and pulled out the needle. "This time, focus on what you feel instead of yelling like some Schwächling!"
She plunged the needle down again, sinking it into another point of his palm. Now that he was properly prepared for it, he noted that like with her touch, he couldn't actually feel the intrusion on his skin at all.
That didn't make the sight of it any less nauseating though.
When she'd confirmed his missing reaction, she proceeded to pull out the needle and reinsert it at a higher point of his hand. She continued this process, stabbing at higher and higher points until finally…
"Ouch!" MC exclaimed, feeling a sharp pain from a point just below his shoulder where Cynthia had just inserted the needle. Immediately, Cynthia pulled out the tool, and reached up to touch at the spot.
"You can feel at this point, ja?"
"Yeah." He said, shivering slightly at her cold touch.
"But not here?" She said, sliding her hand down a few inches. The cold sensation disappeared.
"Nothing." He confirmed.
"Hmm." She lifted her needle again, and moved to his legs. "Let us see if the case is the same with your other limbs.
"Uh, is the needle really necessary?" He asked, watching as she began stabbing his toes. "Can't you just, I don't know, poke with a finger?"
"Nein." Came her simple reply, and she continued the process.
After three more painful stabs near his hip area and other shoulder, Cynthia finally concluded her testing. MC, who was beginning to feel more like a sewing tool than a human being at this point, breathed a sigh of relief.
"Faszinierend." Cynthia said. "It would seem that your arms and legs have both completely shut down while the rest of your body functions as normal."
"No shit!" Natsuki said. "We could have told you that without turning MC into a pincushion. Now how do we cure him?!"
"Did you go through any strenuous physical activities today, prior to the paralysis?" Cynthia asked, ignoring Natsuki.
"Not really." MC said. "Nothing out of the ordinary, anyway."
"Describe it to me." Cynthia demanded, and MC went on to detail everything how he'd gone to Sayori's place after school to help her study and play the Dancing game, followed by assisting Natsuki with her baking, then going to Monika to… do things, before finally making it to Yuri's house.
Like he'd said, nothing too taxing and out of the ordinary.
And yet, Cynthia seemed to be taken aback by his recounting of events.
"And… how exactly did you get from place to place?" She asked. "Did you take the bus? Bike?"
"Just kinda ran." He answered. "Sayori borrowed my bike a few months ago and I just forgot to get it back."
"I uh, kinda broke it today." Sayori added, blushing awkwardly. "Crashing into Yuri's house was faster than braking."
"You did what?!" Yuri exclaimed, scandalized.
"You ran between four girls in a single day?" Cynthia asked.
"Yeah." MC nodded. "Been doing it for a while now."
"Why?" The Doctor asked, raising a suspicious eyebrow.
He frowned, unsure what she meant.
"They're my girlfriends, it's just nice to spend time with them?"
"Das Schwein!" Cynthia exclaimed, looking positively livid. "You are unfaithful to Monika?!"
"No no, not at all!" MC hurried to clarify. "That's just how our Arrangement goes!"
"Arrangement?" Cynthia repeated, looking like she was undecided on whether or not to stab the needle into more sensitive spots on his body.
"Some time ago, me, Sayori, Yuri and Natsuki met up in our Club, to talk." Monika came to his rescue. "It turned out that each one of us shared the same romantic feelings towards MC. But rather than deciding which one of us was going to get him, we came to the agreement that not one of us deserved him more than the others, and we should all just… share him, instead. That's how we created the Arrangement, a system that would ensure each of us got to spend time with him a roughly equal amount."
Cynthia looked speechless at Monika's explanation, her beady eyes wide with shock.
MC couldn't exactly blame her, having had pretty much the same reaction himself when the girls had pitched their proposal to him. It'd taken him several weeks of consideration before he'd finally agreed and his life had forever changed.
"That is… interesting." She said, looking at Monika as if just starting to see her in a whole new light. "I do not think your mother would have done the same in your shoes. She would have eliminated any and all competition that stood in her way to ensure she got what she wanted, Gott segre sies."
Monika blushed, and glanced around the room at the other girls.
"That… wouldn't have been fair to them." She said, quietly.
There was silence for a bit before Cynthia spoke up again.
"How long has this… Arrangement, been going on?"
"Must have been, what, four months now?" MC said, looking around to get confirming nods from Yuri and Monika.
"Ach du Lieber, he's dedicated too!" Cynthia exclaimed, impressed. "I wish my third husband had been as productive as this kid back when he was still alive."
No one said anything, and Cynthia quickly moved on, scoffing at their lack of reactions.
"Well in any case, the symptoms are crystal clear." She said, making them all look up in surprise. "Four months straight of running between four different houses after school is going to exhaust even the most well-trained man on earth, and certainly a simple teenager like MC. Especially if Monika is anything like her mother, and does to him what I suspect during their visits…"
She cackled knowingly, and playfully elbowed a blushing Monika's shoulder.
"Please, stop. I'm actually gonna be sick." Natsuki said.
"You have overworked him, plain and simple." Cynthia continued. "He most likely didn't even notice the strain. Boys will often ignore their body's needs if it means being with a pretty girl, let alone four of them. But eventually, biology catches up to us all."
"I- is it permanent?" MC finally asked the question that'd been weighing on his mind since the start of this. "Please tell me I won't need to get amputated."
"Ooh, but then you could get robot arms and legs!" Sayori said, moving her own arms around in short, halting motions, imitating something mechanical. "Greetings. Human. I. Am. M. C. Stands. For. Magnificent. Computerbrain. Beep. Boop."
"While I'd definitely buy MC bionic limbs in a heartbeat, I don't think we'll need to do anything that extreme." Monika said, patting Sayori lovingly on her head. "Right, Cynthia?"
"Nein, I do not think so." Cynthia replied, continuing to look him over. "I'll explain this in terms you millennials should be able to understand. Think of MC's body as one of those fancy computer devices that's been turned on for much too long, and shut down in protest. It's going to need a bit of rest for a while where it does absolutely nothing to recover its data. After that though, he should be good to go for physical therapy."
"For how long should he rest?" Sayori asked.
"Eh, I'd give it about a month." Cynthia shrugged.
"A month?!" MC yelled in disbelief.
"Of course. You don't think these things just fixes themselves overnight, do you? Schwachsinnige!" Cynthia shook her head.
"I… don't think I've ever heard about such a condition before." Yuri said, narrowing her purple eyes in what looked like vague suspicion.
"Ah, and of course you happen to be a medically trained professional such as myself, ja?" Cynthia shot back. "I didn't think so. This was quite a common thing to have way back when the current generation were not as spoiled and lazy as they are now."
"…which was when, The Bronze Age?" Natsuki asked, and was once again ignored by the Doctor.
"Ultimately, all we can do is wait until MC's body decides to function again." She went on. "In the meantime, you are going to have to take care of him and make sure he stays alive now that he's so utterly helpless."
She leaned down to smack his cheeks a few times in what she undoubtedly thought was an affectionate gesture.
"You are a very lucky man, having someone like Monika to help you." She said, and he stared up at her, dumbfounded. He didn't exactly feel particularly lucky right now.
"Well, I should be heading home now. Do call me again if his condition worsens, or you just want to catch up, Monika darling! I do so enjoy chatting with you."
"Thanks for coming, Cynthia." Monika smiled and waved.
"May I see your medical licens-" Yuri started, but Cynthia had already departed the room.
"Auf Wiedersehen!" They heard her call out, followed by the front door smacking shut.
Mm-hm, yes, that is exactly how the human body works and not just a forced excuse for a fanfic plot thank you Dr. Cynthia!
and thank YOU VolrathB for your kind review! I'm glad you think this story is funny!