Helga and Phoebe sat at a picnic table during recess, writing a list of potential adopters. Helga wrote down Sheena's name, and Phoebe wrote down Lorenzo's.

"Any other ideas?" Helga asked. Her own attempts at brainstorming kept getting hindered by her worries, so much so that she considered crossing out Lorenzo's name. If Mischief bites him, his mom will call animal control. Helga shuddered at the thought.

"We could ask Nadine," Phoebe said, "but I doubt she would adopt a pet that eats insects."

Actually, Helga didn't think Nadine was protective of bugs that way. Although Nadine tended to watch flies rather than swat them, she was aware that some insects were pests and wouldn't hesitate to kill a mosquito. Still, Nadine spent most of her free time writing observations about her bug collection, and Helga didn't want Mischief to play second fiddle to an ant colony.

"I kinda want someone who doesn't have a pet but has past experience in pet care," Helga said.

"Hmm..." Phoebe rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "What about Lila Sawyer?"

"Lila?" Although it was clear that Arnold had gotten over her, Lila's name still tasted sour to Helga.

"She lived on a farm before she moved to Hillwood," Phoebe said.

"Well..." Helga knew it wasn't fair to hold a grudge against Lila. "I guess we could ask her."

Phoebe wrote Lila under Lorenzo's name. "Any other preferences?"

"They have to live nearby," Helga said. "I'd hate to ride the bus every day just to check on her well-being."

Phoebe stared blankly at her best friend. "You're planning to perform daily check-ins?"

"Uh, yeah?" Helga wondered why Phoebe seemed confused.

"That type of overbearing behavior could drive away potential adopters," Phoebe said.

Helga waved her hand dismissively. "Oh, please, Phoebe. I just wanna visit her! It's not like I'm forcing them to write an essay on pet care!"

"I'm forcing you to write an essay on pet care," Helga said to Lila on Friday after school. "Five-hundred words—minimum—and I want it tomorrow morning."

"OK," Lila said. "Do you want me to bring it to your house, or will you pick it up at mine?"

"Bring it to my house," Helga replied. "If the essay is accurate and detailed, you can take Mischief home the same day."

"Really?" Lila's eyes lit up. "Thank you ever-so much!"

Helga smiled. "No problem." Apparently Lila was serious about this, which was all Helga could ask for. Sheena had turned down the offer, saying that monitor lizards were "dangerous," and Lorenzo would probably say the same thing—or his mom would.

"Well, see you tomorrow!" Lila waved goodbye and left, while Helga lingered on school property. She wondered if Arnold had gone home yet, then felt pathetic for thinking about him. You have better things to worry about than unrequited love, Helga told herself. Dr. Bliss wanted her to find better uses of her time, and Helga was determined to make her proud.

"Helga!" Curly shouted from the top of the concrete steps. "Can I talk to you?"

"No!" Helga shouted back.

Curly ran down the steps and over to Helga, who was attempting to walk away. "I wanna adopt Mischief!"

"You can't," Helga said.

"Why not?"

"She wouldn't like you."

"How do you know?"

Helga decided to lie. "I trained her to attack you."

"What? Why would you do that?" Curly sounded more offended than confused.

Helga walked off without answering him. She didn't have time for this. If Lila's essay was as perfect as the ones she wrote for school, tonight would be Helga's last night with Mischief.

As she approached her house, Helga noticed a For Sale sign on the front yard. That means it's still on the market, right? She knocked on the door.

"Oh, it's you," was how Big Bob greeted her. "We still haven't sold the house yet."

Good, Helga thought. She entered the living room to find Miriam packing up Olga's trophies. She was putting them into cardboard boxes.

"You're already packing?" Helga asked.

"Well, the trophies," Miriam said. "They're going into a storage unit."

"Oh," Helga said. She had hoped that her parents would throw them away.

"Have you found a place for that lizard yet?" Big Bob asked Helga. "It's about time you got rid of it."

"I'm giving her to Lila Sawyer," Helga said. Then she heard a loud hiss coming from Olga's bedroom.

"Mischief?" Helga called out. "Are you OK?" She ran to Olga's bedroom to check on the lizard.

Mischief was lounging on a log in her enclosure, wearing a scowl. Helga checked the enclosure and scanned the room, but she didn't find anything unusual.

"You're a smart girl, aren't you? You probably know that Bob doesn't respect you."

Mischief blinked.

"Don't listen to him," Helga said. "You're a good girl. But I have to give you to Lila, OK?"

Mischief hissed.

"What, you don't like Lila?"

Hiss.

"I guess you picked up on my distaste for her."