The trip back to the festival Isa spent mostly in silence, as the group enjoyed the remaining moments of their temporary freedom from responsibility. Isa herself was content in simply relishing in the company of her friends as she listened to Hange and Isabel chatter away.

Those two are so similar, it's no wonder they get along.

She noticed that Furlan kept glancing her way, and she wasn't entirely sure why.

Is he thinking about the other night when he and Levi both saved me from Derek? Is he worried that Derek will try something again, maybe on the expedition tomorrow? Is he maybe worried that something else will happen?

It's definitely a possibility. The majority of these expeditions results in a large amount of loss. I have first-hand experience with that.

Why does he keep looking at me?

She sent him a questioning look and was amazed when he simply looked away, the faintest pink tinging his cheeks.

Isa wasn't quite sure what to make of it, so she brushed it off to being in the sun for too long. Perhaps his skin hadn't adjusted yet after living in the Underground for so long.

She moved Luna next to him. "You alright there Furlan?

He jolted, not having expected her to move beside him. "Y-yea." He cleared his throat. "I mean, yes, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Just curious, you seem a little off."

He gave a nervous laugh. "Just thinking about the expedition tomorrow."

"Anything I can help with?"

"No, just a bit nervous I guess."

She raised her hand and hesitated, before placing it on his shoulder. When he tensed, she just assumed he wasn't used to people touching him. "I can't tell you that it's going to be okay. Anything can happen out there. All I can really tell you, is listen to your squad leader, and don't do anything stupid. Even though Flagon is a giant asshole, he's not going to risk your lives out of spite." Isa didn't want to admit that she was worried as well, knowing it wouldn't make him feel any better. She focused on reassuring him instead.

He gave her a kind smile, but his eyes were unreadable to her. "Thanks, don't worry, we won't do anything stupid."

"Good." She smiled warmly at him, missing the way he swallowed when she did.

By the time they arrived to base, night had fallen and Isa made her way up onto the roof. The day out had left her both exhausted and energized, and she wasn't yet ready to sleep.

Sleep meant the time would pass. The faster time would pass, the sooner the day would be over, the sooner the expedition would come.

She wasn't ready for the day to be over with.

As she sat, silently enjoying the night, Furlan came to join her. She was surprised at how close she'd grown with him since he'd joined. He'd helped her in more ways than she'd ever expected, between coming to grips with Lucy's death to understanding Levi to protecting her when Derek tried to assault her.

She smiled at him. "You feeling any better about tomorrow?"

"A bit."

Isa could tell there was still something on Furlan's mind.

"I hope you know, that after an expedition, the superiors have us clean the entire base, top to bottom."

Nothing, no reaction.

She turned her head to look at him. "Hey, you alright?"

He turned to look at her. "Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

She nudged him with her shoulder. "Well you've been awfully quiet since you came up here. Hell, I brought up cleaning just to test you, and you didn't even flinch like you normally do."

He gave a mirthless smile. "…I guess you could say I've got a lot on my mind."

"Is it about the expedition? As long as you guys follow orders and don't do anything stupid, I'm sure you'll be fine."

He looked at her, eyes serious. "You know you can't guarantee that."

"I know, but I don't want you to stress. Stress leads to overthinking, and that's the last thing you want to do out there."

Furlan grew quiet at that.

She chewed at her lip. "Is it something I can help you with?"

"I just…I think I want to stay in the scouts."

That took her by surprise. "What do you mean? You guys have already joined."

What does he mean by that? Is he not officially a scout yet? Are the higher ups waiting to see how they perform first before fully instating them in the Scouts?

He ran a nervous hand through his hair. "It's not really something I can go into too much detail on, but just know, whatever happens tomorrow, I fully plan to stay in the scouts." He looked at her, eyes as serious as she'd ever seen. "And just remember this…we've always done what we had to do to survive, to get out of the Underground."

Her brows furrowed in concern as she took in his words. "…Sounding super cryptic there, but alright."

Furlan looked relieved at that. "And there's one other thing."

Isa looked at him with a raised brow. "And what might that be."

He looked to have an internal debate about what his next words would be. To Isa's surprise, instead of speaking, he leaned in and grazed his lips across hers.

Isa was stunned. She'd never expected, never thought, that a man would want her, not in this way. All those sharp barbs from when she was younger had long since been firmly rooted inside her, keeping her constantly engulfed in self-doubt.

She hadn't been kissed since that first night when Derek tried to take advantage of her, but this was Furlan, her friend. She hadn't even known he wanted to do this. Hadn't known he felt this way.

Did she feel the same as him? This kiss was different than that one, almost asking permission to even be doing so. Where Derek had tried to take what was never offered, Furlan was silently asking if she was even alright with this. His hand had come up to lay gently on her cheek, fingers stroking ever so lightly.

She was, but she didn't feelanything. She would have thought she would feel some sort of heat or rush. That's what you're supposed to feel when you're kissed right? She thought she would have felt the same feelings coursing through her as she did whenever she was around Levi.

Furlan seemed to notice that Isa wasn't responding, and he pulled back, giving her a sad smile. "It's him isn't it."

It wasn't a question and Isa didn't need to clarify who Furlan was referring to, but that didn't mean she was ready to verbally acknowledge this, she had yet to even admit it to herself. "What? N-no…I don't know—"

Seeing through her, he gently cut her off, stroking her cheek with his thumb. "Look, don't worry about it. I just…didn't want to go out there tomorrow and potentially die without letting you know…how I feel. And well, I'm not always very good with words. Better than Levi, but still. I felt that showing you would speak more than my words could ever say. We can't control who we want, so don't worry about it."

Not wanting to answer him, not even knowing how, she pulled him back in for another kiss, desperate to try. Desperate to feel something for someone who actually wanted her. Desperate to feel something other than the confusing emotions that piled up in her when she merely thought of Levi. She thought maybe if she kissed him again, and meant it this time, something would light up inside her, a flicker, the smallest ember, something. And even if she didn't feel anything in return, she was also desperate to give him something, just in case.

She didn't know what would happen tomorrow, so she was willing to give him this.

When her lips met his, she heard him gasp, surprised by her movements, but he quickly recovered. An unsteady hand made its way up to her head, gently tangling itself into her hair, pulling her ever closer. His lips were tender as they moved over hers, and when his tongue gently requested entry, she opened to him, allowing him to further deepen the kiss.

She had no idea what she was doing, and she was afraid of messing up. Furlan was the first person she'd ever willingly kissed, but he didn't seem to notice or care. She just followed him as he guided her, held her as if she were something precious to him. His other hand had come up to gently lay at her waist, a subtle weight that barely registered.

His lips were soft. That was the first thing she noticed. She hadn't expected a man's lips to be so smooth. Sure, they lookedthat way, but looking at something and feeling it were two completely different things.

She had thought that she would feel something, some kind of warmth, electricity, a spark, something. Furlan's kiss was gentle, soothing, sweet, just like the man himself. Yet she didn't feel the rush that she felt simply from being aroundLevi.

The kiss was nice. But that was it. Nice. No sparks, no feelings, no overwhelming desire. Nothing.

When he pulled back a second time, he gave her another small smile, eyes full of sadness but also, understanding. "I know, it's okay." His hand gently brushed the hair from her face, before grazing his fingertips along her cheek.

Leaning back, he accepted that she was not his to touch, not his to hold, not in the way he wanted. Whatever way she needed him, he was happy to be that for her. He would do whatever he could to protect her, for whatever time he had left.

She groaned in frustration and confusion, burying her face in her hands. "I just…why can't I want this? You accepted me with no problem. This would be far easier."

It was just her luck that she didn't want him. Because here was someone who finally wanted her, the way she'd always dreamed but never dared to hope. But she didn't feel the same. Life could be so cruel sometimes.

He draped an arm over her shoulder, as he'd done so many times in the past, providing her a simple comfort. "Like I said, we can't control who we do or don't want."

"But I don't even know what I want or ifI want anything from…him."

He paused, gathering his thoughts. "Levi…he's had it rough, for reasons I can't share. He cares more about others than he lets on. Just…if something happens between you two…don't hurt him. He'll do just about anything for someone he cares about, and being betrayed by someone he cares for kills him inside."

Isa gave a small chuckle. "I bet he would kill you if he heard you saying that."

"Oh most definitely."

"Furlan…" He hummed in response. "I'm sorry."

He wrapped his arm around her tighter, pulling her close. "Don't worry about it. Some things just aren't meant to be. If it's any consolation, I think you would be good for him."

She let her head rest against her friend's shoulder, a warm comfort settling over her. "I don't know how I feel about him. It's…confusing. Even still…I don't think he would ever want someone like me."

He pulled her back, giving her a serious look. "Don't say that. Any guy would be lucky to have you."

She gave him a meek smile and looked down at the ground below, avoiding his eyes. "There are things you don't know about me, and I think if you did, you wouldn't be so quick to say that."

He gently took her chin in his hand, raising her head so her gaze could meet his. "Isa, listen to me. I'm no stranger to having to do what's needed to survive. I can assure you, nothing in your past is going to top anything in ours. We're not going to judge you." His eyes were earnest, emphasizing that he meant what he said. "And Levi would be the least likely to judge anyone for shitty things in their past. I'm going to give you one little secret about him. He's the type of person where loyalty goes a long way. If you can show him you're loyal and trustworthy, then nothing else matters."

She snuggled back up against him, eyes drooping. "Thanks Furlan. I know you say you're not good with words, but you always know what to say to make me feel better."

"One other thing. I…I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow."

She gave a sleepy yawn. "None of us do."

"Just…let me get this out. If something happens to me or Isabel, or both of us, don't give up on Levi. I need to know that he won't be alone."

"If I survive, then yes, I promise." And with that, she let the exhaustion take her, and fell asleep, resting on her friend's shoulder.

Neither of them ever noticed the dark figure lurking in the shadows behind them, watching them, seething, plotting.

The next morning, Isa awoke in her bed.

That's odd, wasn't I on the roof last night? Did Furlan carry me here?

She was still torn over their kiss. She wished that she had felt something. It would have been so much easier that way, to want someone who wanted her.

And yet her thoughts still strayed to Levi.

What did Ethel call him? An enigma? A mystery. Is that why my thoughts are constantly drawn to him? Why I find myself watching him in training? Out on the grounds? In the mess hall?

Feeling ridiculous considering that it was the day of an expedition, Isa shoved the thoughts of Levi out of her head, forcing herself to get up and start preparing.

She went through the same routine as she had the first expedition, making sure to spend extra time preparing Luna.

All too soon, it was time to join the other scouts so that they could head out. Now seated astride Luna, she guided her to stand beside Hange and her horse. Even though the two of them were on different squads, she enjoyed riding beside her until they reached the gates.

They rode in silence as the scouts made their way to the gates of Shiganshina. Isa appreciated that Hange wasn't talking. She loved her friend dearly, but right now, she needed quiet.

She was nervous about this expedition, worried. Her first expedition was not a good one, and the memory of Lucy dying still weighed heavily on her mind.

Who else will I lose? Will I die?

A dark cloud began to form over Isa's head.

She knew her squad mates were strong, but anything goes outside the walls, especially in the first expedition. She remembered the week before her first, how they'd been told that most new recruits don't survive their first one, but their chances of survival for future ventures increase if they manage to make it through the first.

She'd managed to survive the first one somehow, yet she knew that still didn't make her untouchable.

And what about the three new recruits? This was their first expedition. Sure, all three of them were beyond talented and skilled, but even the most elite scouts had fallen in the past.

What if I'm doomed to watch everyone I care about die?

Before she knew it, they'd arrived at the gates. Her stomach was in knots, and she turned to face Hange.

"Hange." Her friend turned her head to meet Isa's eyes. "Be careful out there."

Hange gave Isa small smile. "You too."

She faced forward once more, and willed her stomach to loosen. As the sound of clanking and spinning gears filled the air, the commander gave another speech, in an attempt to boost morale. She let the words fill her, trying to push past her fear.

When the commander shouted 'move out,' she nudged Luna forward, taking her place with her squad as they rode through the gates.

She looked beside her and saw Levi staring up as the sky unfolded before him. His eyes had widened, jaw dropping ever so slightly.

Her breath caught in her throat from the sheer beauty of seeing his handsome face so mesmerized. It had lost its normally neutral expression, and it reminded her of that first night so long ago, when they'd first watched the sunset. Except even then, his face hadn't held that almost serene look she saw on it now.

The wonder in his face made him look infinitely younger, the hard lines it was normally set in having faded away.

He's breathtaking.

She flushed as the unexpected thought appeared in her mind out of nowhere and flushed even harder when she realized how long she'd been staring.

Hoping that no one had noticed she faced forward.

Focus Isa, you're literally outside the wall where death can happen at anytime, and you're sitting here staring at him. Have you no shame?

Despite her embarrassment, she chuckled to herself at Isabel's excitement when she heard her call out 'whoa, amazing!'

Isa remembered how it felt the first time she rode through the gates, and she imagined similar sensations were running through them. Levi's softly murmured 'it's not bad' held thinly veiled amazement.

She had to admit, the colors surrounding them were spectacular. The bright oranges, reds, and yellows filling the trees up ahead were framed by the brilliant, bright blue of the sky. The colors of the fallen leaves painted the ground surrounding the trees.

You have a point Isabel.

Amazing.

Of course, Sairam had to ruin the moment with his usual attitude. Isa had to hold back a harsh retort when he yelled at them, telling them that a few Underground punks don't stand a chance. She got where he was coming from when he said that even elites had fallen. It was true. But he could have been less of an asshole about it.

Then again…it was Sairam. Isa didn't think he knew how notto be an asshole.

She laughed when Isabel told him that if she beats the titans, then that would make her better than the elites. She loved her spunky nature and how she never held back.

As they rode past a grove of trees, a titan appeared out of nowhere. She watched as a group of scouts went to take care of this one, and when the second titan appeared from behind it, her skin prickled.

Something is different about this one.

When the titan failed to follow the scouts attempting to lure it away from the supply wagons, it hit Isa.

This one is an abnormal! Shit!

She watched as a group of scouts were taken out trying to slay the titan.

A rush of fear ran through her as she watched Levi, Isabel, and Furlan dash towards the abnormal.

No! Wait! What are you doing! Flagon didn't tell you to go! Didn't you see that titan just take out those scouts?

She wanted to cry out for them to come back, but she reeled it in, not wanting to distract them. The slightest distraction can be fatal when approaching a titan. Besides, she needed to stay on course with the rest of the scouts and trust that they would be alright.

Despite telling herself to trust them, the heavy cloud above her stayed ever present.

When the trio rejoined them, she released a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding.

They made it.

The dark cloud above Isa only grew as they rode on, her stomach twisting in knots. Thankfully, the rest of the ride to the castle ruins was quiet. Except, this only succeeded in making Isa more antsy, more on edge. In that first expedition, it was also quiet the majority of the first day, and then chaos hit on day two.

What if something happens tomorrow? Or even tonight? Sure titans generally don't move at night, but what if there's an abnormal that does? Anything goes, anything can happen out here. Last time we were surrounded early in the morning. What if that happens again?

Later that night, Isa had found a room on the second floor of the castle, away from everyone else, where she sat herself against the wall for some quiet. She was furiously writing in her journal, consumed by the emotions coursing through her.

Ever since they'd left Shiganshina, the dark cloud above her had only grown when she watched her friends take on that titan without even thinking about it. It had been festering all day, to the point where it was consuming her entire being.

She'd never felt worry and fear like this before. Was it worse because she now knew what it was to lose a comrade to a titan? Watch them get devoured?

Losing someone as an adult is different from losing someone as a child.

So absorbed in her journal, she didn't notice when Furlan stepped into the room. She jolted when he sat down next to her and looked up to meet his worried eyes.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Her voice cracked a little at the word, but she was determined to hold it in, despite the fact that there were fissures forming in the barrier holding back her tears.

She looked back down at her journal, not wanting him to see the turbulent distress in her eyes.

A gentle hand turned her head back to look at him.

"If something is bothering you, you can tell me. It's okay to lean on a friend sometimes." The concern in his face threatened to break her.

"H-how can you still want to help me?" Her lip quivered as she spoke, voice trembling.

A gentle thumb stroked her cheek, wiping away a lone tear that had slipped past her wall. "Just because you don't feel the same for me, doesn't mean I'm going to stop being your friend. What kind of person would I be if I did that?"

What did I do to deserve a friend like this? To deserve any of them?

Every bit of grief she'd tried to hold back, all the anxieties, her insecurities had accumulated over time to the point where she could no longer hide it.

The dam burst, and she threw her arms around him, burying her face in his neck as she sobbed.

"I'm just afraid.Losing Lucy was hard. I…I don't know what I'll do if I lose anyone else. All of you, Hange, Isabel, you, even Levi in some way, Sherri, even though she hates me, all of you mean too much to me. I don't know if I can take it if I lose anyone else. Anything can happen out here."

Isa could tell that Furlan was clearly taken aback and wasn't sure what to do, in the way he awkwardly moved his arms around her in a loose hug, but she couldn't pull back now. Having reached her breaking point, the tears poured out of her, months of pent-up fear, worry, frustration, loss flooded out of her.

She hadn't cried like this since the day she'd gone to Lucy's grave and Hange had held her, but even then, the emotions she felt then paled in comparison to the waves now crashing through her.

She didn't know how long she sat there, sobbing into her friend's neck. He'd gained some confidence and had wrapped his arms tighter around her, now stroking her back lightly, offering her whatever comfort he could.

She pulled back and looked at Furlan, her friend. Oh, how she wished she could return his feelings.

Adding guilt to the mix didn't help.

He met her eyes, unsure of what to say to comfort her. "I can't tell you that we won't die tomorrow, no one knows that. But you're strong, I know you are. You'll pull through it if something happens."

She sniffled. "How can you be so sure?"

He took a cloth from his pocket, using it to gently wipe at her tear-stained face. "Because I've seen it. That time when I found you in the stables, even though you were upset, you still managed to get through the day. That day, when we went to the festival, you still managed to laugh, despite everything you've been through. You're a fighter, like Isabel, like Levi, like me."

She looked into his calm gray eyes, and desperately wished that she could feel something. All she felt was a comforting warmth, the same she felt around Hange or Isabel, the kind felt around close friends.

Her eyes threatened to well again. "Furlan, I'm so sorry. I wish I could give you what you want."

He sat her comfortably on his lap and just held her close. "Stop apologizing, it's okay. Whatever way you need me, I'm here for you." He grabbed his cloak and laid it gently on her.

"But it's not fair to you."

"You've given me more than I could have ever hoped for." He stroked her hair. "Sleep now."

Too exhausted to question what he said, she allowed herself to drift off in the comfort of her friend's arms.

The next morning, Isa felt somewhat embarrassed at having broken down in Furlan's arms. Not only that, but the immense guilt she felt in how willing he'd been to be there for her, however she needed. She didn't know a person could do that when they felt something more for a friend. She would have thought he wouldn't want anything else to do with her after she'd rejected him.

He'd held her all through the night, and that couldn't have been comfortable.

'Whatever way you need me, I'm here for you.'

How can a person want more from someone and be willing to accept so little?

Isabel came up to Isa, breaking her from her thoughts.

Isa was immediately concerned to see she had a serious expression on her face, more serious than Isa had ever seen.

"Isabel, are you alright?"

The girl seemed to think hard about what she was going to say next.

"Isa, I don't know what's going to happen today, or if Furlan and I will survive. I know that Levi will, he's so strong, the strongest person I've ever met, but I worry about him if something were to happen to us. Can you promise me something?" Isabel's brows were furrowed in concentration and worry.

"Of course."

"Can you promise not to give up on him? I know he's not the easiest to be around, but that's just because of everything that's happened in his past. Even if it doesn't seem like it, he cares a lot about others. Just, watch out for him, please."

"I promise. But you guys are going to be fine." She knew she shouldn't say something like that, no one knows what's going to happen outside the wall. But she wanted to soothe the girl's worries. She seemed so distraught at the thought of Levi being alone, and it was so unlike her. "I've seen you guys train, and you three are really strong. But if it makes you feel better, I promise that I won't leave him alone, no matter how hard he tries to push me away."

Isabel's arms crossed tight in front of her, as if trying to warm herself from the chill that came from fear. "I just worry, because Bro isn't exactly the type to go seek out comfort. If something happens to us, he's going to rein it in and lock it up tight, like he does with everything else."

Isa gave her friend a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, if I survive this, and he's the only one left, I won't abandon him."

Isabel wrapped her arms tight around Isa. "Thanks Sis."

Soon, it was time to move out to their next destination. Isa rode alongside Sofia and Ingrid, the three young women constantly monitoring for the appearance of titans. Levi, Isabel, and Furlan, were somewhere up ahead of them. Derek, Sairam, and Flagon somewhere towards her left.

After maybe half an hour of riding since leaving the castle, Isa noticed a giant storm cloud in their path.

That cannot be good.

It didn't take long for the rain to fall from the clouds, dousing everyone.

Shit, this is the worst possible thing to happen outside the walls. With such a low range of visibility, we won't see the titans until they're right on top of us!

It didn't help that the flares weren't working, as the colored smoke did nothing more but wisp away in the rain.

How long until we run into titans?

Almost as soon as she thought that, a titan appeared in front of her, poking its head through the fog and rain, a sinister grin on its face. As Isa cried out in surprise, Luna reared up, throwing Isa off of her before bolting.

Normally the horses held up well around titans, but this had taken the mare completely off guard, not having expected it, and she's still an animal, and animals have instincts to flee from unexpected danger.

As Isa fell to the ground, the breath knocking out of her, a crashing realization hit Isa.

They were surrounded. With the pouring rain, her worst fear had been confirmed. No one had noticed the swarm of titans heading their way until it was too late.

Looking around, she noticed that someone had taken care of the titan in front of her, leaving it to steam away in the rain. She saw that Flagon's squad was one of many trying to fight off the horde, but she noticed they were missing some members, making it more difficult than it should be.

Where the hell are Furlan, Isabel, and Levi? Where did they go? Did something happen? I haven't seen them since we left the castle.

Isa didn't have much time to wonder for her friend's safety given the current situation. She was alone. The others were occupied with trying to stay alive. And there was another titan heading her way that she needed to take care of. Now. The lack of trees made it difficult to find a place to hook onto.

She only had herself to rely on in this moment. As horrifying as that seemed, she needed to shove that fear aside if she wanted to live.

She decided that her best course of action would be to slice the heels, like she had in that first expedition.

Back after that first expedition, she had asked Sofia about this maneuver, and her comrade had made a good point. When you're out on the field without any trees or buildings, it's difficult to maneuver up to the titan's neck, especially if they're swinging their arms. Slicing their heels brings them down to a level where the scouts can more easily get to the nape.

It's dangerous, but Isa didn't have much choice.

She made quick work of slicing through the heels, followed by the nape, finishing the beast.

As she landed, she looked up to see Isabel and Furlan rejoining them, entering the fray of titans surrounding them. A rush of relief flooded her followed by concern when she noticed that Levi was missing.

Why isn't he with them? Did they get separated?

She watched as Furlan's horse was startled by a titan that appeared out of nowhere in front of him. The stallion fell to the ground, landing on top of Furlan, trapping him underneath its body. As she watched the titan reach its hand down for his struggling form, she started running, in a desperate attempt to reach him in time.

No…please no.

Looking on, she watched as Isabel flew in, a red-headed blur, attempting to save her dear friend.

Isabel looks on at the scene unfolding in front of her. Anger fills her small body as she watches the titan reach down to grab the man she's come to love as a brother. One of the best men she's ever known.

That's her brother. One of the few people who's ever been there for her. She can count on one hand the number of people she can depend on, and Levi and Furlan are always first.

She's lost track of the number of times those two have saved her. Saved her from herself. From others. From everything.

Like hell if she's going to sit here and watch him die when she can do something about. If Levi is still out there hunting for Erwin and those damned documents, then she'll take his place and save everyone.

A flood of determination pours through her body spurring her to move forward. She'll take it upon herself to do what Levi would do. She swiftly flies through the air, slicing the fingers off the titan. She latches her hook onto the titan's arm, swinging up and around, aiming for the titan's neck.

As her momentum carries her down, she slices down with as much force as she can muster, landing swiftly on the titan's back.

She miscalculates, hitting the titan's upper shoulder instead. She looks at the gash that should have been on the nape in horror, realizing her fatal mistake.

She makes to run up the titan, up to its neck. She slips on some rain that had collected on its back, slamming her head against its body, leaving her disoriented as she rolls down its back. Her eyes blink open to the sight of a second titan eyeing her with a voracious grin on its face.

Her eyes widen in horror and fill with tears as she realizes she's trapped, with nowhere to go.

She thinks back to her time with her family, and how much she's going to miss them.

Furlan and his kind-hearted nature, always willing to help others when he can. Never one to watch someone suffer. Someone you can depend on, no matter what.

Levi. A kind, sweet soul at heart, hidden by a gruff exterior brought about by years of trauma. The most loyal person she's ever met. He saved her from death all those years ago, when she was nothing but a half-dead runt on the cold streets of the Underground.

Their adventures in the Underground, soaring around as they fought together to survive the hellish life they'd been given.

That moment when they'd finally made it out, so close to the freedom they'd longed for.

She loves them both immensely, her brothers, her family. She only hopes they can make it out of this mess, and finally be free.

Her final breath is spent calling out for Levi, as the titan slams its mouth onto her tiny body.

"Isabel!" Isa shrieked as she watched the titan devour her friend.

No! This can't be happening! I-I was just talking to her not even an hour ago! This can't be real! I'm dreaming right? This has to be a dream!

She couldn't mourn for long, Furlan was still in trouble. He'd managed to pull himself out from under his horse, but his gear was malfunctioning. Desperate to not let another friend die, she made to run towards him again, but a hand on her arm stopped her. Turning, her heart slammed into her throat as she met the vicious eyes of Derek.

"You're not going anywhere. You're going to stay here and watch him die. I told you, you will be mine." His voice was dark as his grip on her arm tightened.

Isa looked in horror as Flagon zoomed in slicing the nape of the titan attacking Furlan, but he'd made a mistake. He hadn't noticed the titan that appeared behind him, grabbing him from the air as he completed the cut. Isa watched as the titan bit down on her squad leader.

Another one, gone.

She turned and glared at Derek. "Are you happy? Look at what you did! We could have saved them both, and now our squad leader is dead."

A resounding crack filled the air as Derek's hand smacked across Isa's face, drawing the attention of Furlan.

"I saw you with him the other night, you little slut. You think you can tease me, have your little thugs beat me up, and then get together with him."

She shrank into herself at the hostile rage simmering in his eyes. "I-I don't know what you're talking about. P-please, we're in the middle of an expedition and we're surrounded by titans."

She hated what she turned into when he was around her, this quivering, weak mess, unable to defend herself. She didn't understand what it was about him that rendered her completely useless and meek.

Desperate to get away, she made to zip off to attack the next titan, but something stopped her. She realized that he still had a grip on her arm, and when she looked at him, his face had turned menacing and maniacal.

He's lost it.

Pure hatred filled his gaze as something inside him snapped. "If I can't have you then no one can!"

To Isa's horror, Derek pulled a knife from his pocket, using it to slice through the straps that held her gear onto her body and shoved her into the path of a fast-approaching titan. With that, he zipped off, leaving her to die.

She was too stunned to try to move out of the way, frozen in place. Without her gear, she was defenseless. She turned her head and saw Furlan's horrified gaze meet hers as the titan reached down to grab her in its hand.

Furlan watches with bated breath as Derek cuts through Isa's gear and pushes her into the oncoming titan. When her frightened gaze meets his as the titan reaches for her, an energy surges through him like he's never felt before, as terror and panic fills every fiber of his being.

His gear is broken, so he doesn't have much time to act before the titan pulls her up out of reach. Sprinting faster than he's ever gone, desperation ever prominent on his face, he pulls his blades out of their holster, preparing himself as he moves to fulfill his promise to protect her.

Isa is barely a few feet off the ground when Furlan leaps up and slices through the arm holding her, his blades snapping off with the force at which he cut. He watches in relief as she falls back to the ground, safe.

He fails to notice the titan's other arm swinging down.

Time seems to slow as he feels the titan grab him with its uncut arm and starts lifting him to its mouth. Without blades, there is no hope for him.

And it is in that moment, that Furlan understands the depth of his feelings for the woman. He finally is able to make sense of the emotions and sensations that course through him whenever in her presence. Whenever he thinks of her.

He realizes that somehow, over the course of his time in the Scouts, he has fallen in love with this sweet, witty woman. And the awareness of it comes crashing down on him.

What he had thought was a simple crush, nothing more than an attraction, had actually been a deep-seated love that he'd never felt before. That he'd never expected to experience.

He can't determine when it happened.

Perhaps it had been in that moment when she'd radiantly smiled at him for something as simple as naming his horse and his heart had lurched at the sight.

Perhaps it had been when he'd seen her pinned up against the stable by the same man who had just shoved her into a titan, and he'd been overwhelmed by a need to protect like he'd never felt before.

Perhaps it had been shortly after, when he'd felt her small hand grasp onto his shirt, trembling in fear. And later, when he'd held her gently in his arms, and she'd felt so fragile and precious, he'd wanted nothing more than to cherish her.

Or perhaps it had been at the festival when her beautiful laughter had rang through the air, a joyous, lighthearted, musical sound like he'd never heard before that had reached down to caress his soul, reaching depths he hadn't known existed.

The way her face had lit up in that instant, he'd wanted to spend the rest of his moments trying to get that same brilliant light on her face again, for her radiant being could brighten even the darkest of rooms. The darkest of nights. The darkest of souls.

When it had happened no longer mattered. At some point, his heart had become hers.

Two nights ago, he had accepted with ease that she would never be his. Some things just aren't meant to be.

He only hopes that she can be happy. Whether it be with Levi or with someone else, he hopes that she can find joy and love in her life.

For she has given him a gift that he'd never expected to receive. Hadn't known he'd wanted. She's given him, some lowly thief from the Underground, someone to love, in a way that's different from the love he felt for his family, when he had forever thought he'd never be capable of feeling something so special.

Even though she doesn't feel the same for him, he is forever grateful to have loved her, for the brief time he has known her.

He truly believes she can bring light to Levi, the way she has to him.

He watches as his best friend, the man he's come to know as a brother, looks on in horror as he runs, desperate to reach him in time.

He accepts his fate with open arms, happy that the woman he loves is safe, with another chance at life.

Feeling no regrets, he waves a hand in a sorrowful farewell to his brother, and to the woman he loves, welcoming the engulfing darkness.

Time almost slowed to a standstill as Isa watched the titan that had been meant to eat her slowly raise her friend to its mouth. She didn't feel the tears running down her face. She was frozen, couldn't even scream out in agony.

She was sitting on the ground where she'd fallen after Furlan had saved her. As she watched Furlan meet a cruel and unfair fate, she could feel the slightest hint of pain in her foot where she'd landed on it breaking through her stupor.

His blades had broken when he'd sliced through the titan's arm to save her, and she had no way to save him, her gear was lying in a heap where Derek had cut it. Through tear-filled eyes, she watched in horror as Furlan, accepting his fate, waved goodbye to both her and Levi.

She couldn't tear her eyes away as she watched the titan swallow him whole. She felt something break inside her at the realization that he'd saved her life by giving his own.

Wh-why did he do that? Why did he save me? He sacrificed himself…for me? Why?

She barely registered when Levi sliced through the titan's neck and stomach, pulling out Furlan's corpse.

When she saw his mangled, severed body, a harsh reality hit her, and she was overcome by the sudden urge to vomit.

That would have been me if he hadn't saved me. But…why?

She saw the pieces of what was left of Sofia, Ingrid, and Sairam, and she fought back the urge to scream.

Gone, they're all gone.

She watched as Levi obliterated the remaining titans with a speed and strength she had yet to see from him. She wasn't sure if he had seen what happened, if he had been there to watch as Derek tried to kill her and Furlan sacrificed himself to save her.

Isa felt her heart break for Levi when he reached down to Isabel's severed head to close her eyes. When he reached down to pick up her necklace, she felt a desperate need to go to him, hug him, comfort him.

'Bro isn't exactly the type to go seek out comfort.'

Those two were his family.

She heard the sound of approaching horses and turned to see Erwin's squad approaching. Hange was on her horse, and when she saw Isa, she jumped down and raced over to her.

"Isa, are you alright?"

Isa looked at her friend helplessly, the pain and grief swirling through her. "I…I don't know." She felt like she was about to break, but she knew she couldn't, not when it was daytime and she was outside the walls. She needed to keep it together.

'You're strong, I know you are.'

"Can you walk?"

"I…I don't think so. I landed on my ankle when I fell, and it hurts to move it."

"Let me help you up."

Hange draped Isa's arm over her shoulders, pulling her friend to her feet.

As she stood, she heard Levi's voice, having dropped to a menacing growl like the one she'd heard that night with Derek. "I'm going to kill you, you bastard. That's why I'm here." She could hear the currents of grief underlying the anger in his voice.

She turned to face him and saw that Levi had Erwin pinned against the ground, Levi's blade held at bay by Erwin's hand.

She was stunned to hear of Levi's true mission to joining the Scouts, and that Erwin had known all along.

He…he was sent here? To kill Erwin? Who sent him? Was that what Furlan was talking about the other night? He said they'd done what they'd had to, to survive.

I can understand that. That need to survive and do whatever it takes to be free.

When she heard Levi say it was his fault, his pride that had killed his friends, she wanted to go to him, reach out to him, shake him and say that it wasn't his fault. She didn't want him to go down that dark path like she had. She knew that if he let himself succumb to that dark guilt, it would eat him up from the inside out, leaving him an empty shell if he wasn't careful.

Erwin was quick to correct him, with a fierceness she'd never seen from him as he yelled, "It was the titans!"

Erwin reminded Levi of the Scouts' mission. That they do this to answer all their questions about the titans. His voice was forceful as he spoke, reminding them that there are people inside the walls who stay away from danger, content in remaining ignorant, but if everyone stays ignorant, they'll never make progress and will never be able to defeat the titans. His words resonated with her, and in that moment, she truly admired the Squad Leader.

Isa listened at Erwin's final words. "If you begin to regret, you'll dull your future decisions and let others make your choices for you."

She watched as Levi gazed up into the sun breaking through the clouds, brows knit in concentration, lips parted. Isa realized that something in Erwin's speech must have clicked inside of him, because he dropped his blade onto the ground, accepting Erwin's request to join the fight for humanity.

As Isa hobbled to Luna with Hange's help, she spotted two things on the ground. She paused to pick them up, trying to avoid looking at what was left of her friends, and spoke to Hange. "Help me over to Levi."

When she reached the man, his back was facing her as he was about to hop onto his horse. She lifted a shaky hand up to his shoulder and he flinched.

He looked over his shoulder in question.

Without saying a word, she held out Furlan's pocket watch, and Isabel's bracelet, the two gifts she'd given them, knowing that they belonged to him now. The bracelet's clasp was broken, and it must have fallen off of Isabel before she died.

When he only stared at the items and made no move to take them, she grabbed his hand, and gently place the gifts in it.

Unsure of what to say, she let Hange lead her back to her horse.

The entire ride back to Shiganshina, the same question kept whirling in her mind.

Why did he sacrifice himself…for me?