Isa's head dropped back down to Levi's shoulder, and her mind was now playing happier memories of her time with Ethel that brought a peaceful smile on her face.

A warm laugh escaped her. "It's funny, because I completely met Ethel by chance. The four of us were still in training, and we were in Trost for an evacuation drill. We were walking through the district, and I just couldn't believe the sights around me. Life in Trost was so different than life Mitras, and I loved it."

"Probably had your head stuck in the clouds. It's a wonder you didn't run into anything."

She could practically hear the smirk in his voice. "Grouchy ass. Yea, I probably did, but I couldn't help it, there was just so much to see, and I wanted to look at everything all at once."

She took his hand that had been resting on his lap in hers, tracing light patterns across his palm, reveling in the feel of the callouses from constant use of ODM gear. "I came across this little teashop, and it was a complete, spur of the moment decision that had me walking in. I could have just as easily kept walking. I could have just as easily missed it. But somehow, I saw it, and I walked inside."

A serene smile curled her lips at the memory. "I was looking for a specific tea, one my mom used to make me when I was little and would wake up from a nightmare. Ethel helped me figure out that it was chamomile tea, and she somehow knew that I'd lost my mom, and when I told her I'd lost both my parents, she gave me a tin of tea, refused to let me pay for it."

She marveled at how much smaller her hand was than his. He was by no means a large man, yet his hands still managed to engulf hers. "She told me to come visit anytime I wanted. And I did. I had a family again, just because I wanted some tea."

Her voice was hushed, content as she spoke. "I'll never regret my time with her. It hurts that I lost her, but the pain of losing someone just means you had something worth losing to begin with."

He hummed. "I never thought of it that way."

She tilted her head back to look at him, amusement lighting her eyes. "Well you're not the only one who can speak words of wisdom like the good devout follower you are."

He sighed in feigned exasperation. "You're never going to let that one go, are you?"

She giggled. "Nope, I intend on fully living up to the 'pain in the ass' label you've given me."

He looked down at her, his own eyes lit with warm amusement. "So be it."

She held his gaze, staring into those beautiful blue orbs that had once held such suspicion towards her, but now watched her with warmth, amusement, and it took her breath away. There were so many emotions swirling within those eyes, and she wished she knew how to pick out what he was feeling, what he felt towards her.

She could feel his arm around her shoulders, his thumb stroking ever so lightly, sending a warmth throughout her that she only ever felt around him.

All she had to do was lean up, and she could press her lips onto his, and she so desperately wanted to, desperately wanted more. She wished she had the courage to do so. She knew other women would have no problem in taking that risk, so she didn't understand why she couldn't.

Why is it so hard for me to take a chance? Sometimes it feels like he might, and so many people have told me he does, but I can't help but doubt them, because what if they're wrong?

Especially considering Uma said he sees me as a friend.

Why is it that other women know how to read men like the back of their hand, but I can't? How do they do it?

She looked down to see where she held his hand and swallowed thickly when she saw he had linked his fingers with hers and she hadn't even realized it. They were so strong, so sturdy. She'd seen how easily they maneuvered his gear, the way they controlled his blades to cut through titan after titan. His hands knew how to take down people with ease, could bring pain if need be. Yet they'd been ever so gentle that night as he took care of her. She remembered how lightly they'd brushed across her skin, taking extra care around her bruises.

She'd almost felt…cherished, almost as if she were something precious to him.

But that's…that's not possible right? He would do that for anyone else right?

Her breath hitched as she watched his thumb stroke across her skin, the feel of it sending tingles up her arm.

She turned her head back to face Ethel's headstone and sat in silence, enjoying the steady sound of his heartbeat that always managed to calm her.

I…I remember hearing his heartbeat that first time I had an attack in Trost, and then again that night, when he picked me up and carried me, I could hear it then to. It somehow managed to start breaking through the walls my mind had thrown up.

How does he do it?

Levi turned his head to whisper in her ear. "Whenever you're ready, we can go to Sherri's."

Though it still hurt, the pain had lessened immensely. The closure of saying goodbye to Ethel, Levi's endless patience, had all done wonders in Isa's healing. She knew that saying goodbye to Sherri would give her that next push. She already no longer felt the urge to cry, was already feeling like herself again.

She tilted her head back again to look into those eyes watching her, silently telling her he'd wait as long as she needed.

I am forever grateful to have met this man, to have managed to earn his friendship.

'He's not one to give trust easily, but once he does, you'll have a friend for life.'

'Once the jaded man trusts you, he's loyal to no end. Because you've done the unthinkable. You've broken down his walls and earned his trust.'

He's all that, and more. This beautiful, sweet man is more than anything I could have expected.

She reached up to stroke his cheek again, no longer embarrassed at the act, an affectionate smile on her face. "I'm ready."

He gave her shoulder a light squeeze, before rising, and held his hand out to her. When she took it, he gently pulled her to her feet, and her heart fluttered when he linked his fingers with hers.

She reached down to grab her satchel and followed him as he led her to Sherri's grave. An at peace smile crossed her face when she saw the bundle of beautiful five petaled, purple flowers. They looked both delicate and strong at the same time, just as Sherri had been.

She sat on the ground, and pulled out her journal, smiling when Levi sat next to her, laying his arm around her shoulders again, pulling her close.

Sherri,

You are one of my best friends, my sister. I went from being alone in Mitras, to having people who cared about me, and it was more than I could have ever dreamed.

I know you still felt guilty for what happened after Lucy's death, but I was never mad at you. I understood, I only wish I had stopped blaming myself sooner and opened my eyes to see how much you were hurting.

I never told you this, but I love you, so much. You were one of my best friends, and I know I'll miss you forever. When I joined the Military, I never thought I'd make friends, never thought it would be possible, never thought anyone would want to be friends with me. It had been so long since I'd been around people, that I was afraid I'd forgotten how. But you, Lucy, and Hange gave me a friendship that I'd longed for.

I hope that, wherever you are, you're safe and happy. I promise I will honor your last request, and not blame myself for your death.

Thank you for everything.

Love,

Isa

She leaned forward to gently bury her final goodbye, and then leaned back against Levi, taking the support he offered.

She picked up his hand again, as she did before, tracing more delicate patterns across the back of his hand. She was too content to be embarrassed by the act and had no way of knowing the light touches sent tingles washing across Levi's skin. "I know you don't have the best impression of her, but Sherri, she was a really good person. Always willing to laugh and have a good time. When she came to apologize to me, it hurt to see her so broken. The way she'd treated me hurt, but seeing her like that, it hurt more, and I didn't want to add to that."

"It's not my place to tell you who you should and shouldn't forgive."

"I know, but I just want you to be able to understand why I did."

He gave her shoulder a light squeeze. "I do."

Everything he's done for me today, I never expected any of this. How did he know to do all this?

Isa tilted her head back up to look at him. "I think I'm ready to go back, Levi."

He looked down at her with those captivating, ever patient eyes. "Are you alright?"

Her eyebrows drew in as she tried to get a sense of how she felt. She found she felt at peace, the sadness was still there, but faint. The acceptance that had come from the closure of saying goodbye had done more to push away the grief than she'd realized. "I…I feel like myself again. This last week, I felt like I was stuck in this dark pit, and I didn't know how to get out, but you…you managed to pull me back out."

A peaceful smile crossed his face and her heart thrummed when he brought a hand up to gently trace down her cheek. Isa thought he looked almost…relieved at her words.

He helped her up to her feet again, and she turned to look at Sherri's grave one last time before turning back to him.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, drawing him in for another hug. "Thank you, Levi. I don't know what I would do without you."

His only response was to wrap his arms around her tighter.

"What are we going to do, Levi?"

He turned his head to whisper in her ear. "Not here. It's too open."

She had to hold back a shiver at the feel of his lips against her ear. "Oh…r-right, that makes sense."

Keeping his voice low he said, "We're going to go meet with Hange now."

"What about Eld?"

"It's fine. I asked Gunther to switch out with him after a couple of hours."

She squeezed tighter, drawing her hand up to stroke at his hair. "You thought of everything didn't you?"

He pulled back, giving her forehead a gentle flick. "Stop asking questions for things you already know."

She laughed. "But then how would I live up to my 'pain in the ass' label?"

He smirked down at her. "You do that without even trying." There was no way for her to know that every time she laughed, Levi's heart skipped a beat.

"Yea? Well you're still stuck with me."

Her heart stuttered when his eyes and smile softened, as he reached up to gently tuck some hair that had fallen loose from her braid behind her ear. "So be it."

They made their way back to the base and met Hange in that room Levi had found the week before, making sure no one followed and making sure no one was in the surrounding rooms.

Levi turned to Hange. "What have you found?"

Hange was sitting on the floor with her legs crossed as she looked through the papers she'd brought. "Well the only people left from our training class, not counting me or Isa, are Anna, Mark, and Uma."

"Honestly, my guess would be Anna or Mark. They've been the most hostile towards me."

Hange looked up at Isa. "Do you want to tell Uma? This person seems to be fixated on your friends."

"No."

Isa blinked at Levi. "No?"

"No. Until we decide otherwise, all three of them are potential suspects."

Isa raised a brow. "I thought it was 'innocent until proven guilty.'"

Levi crossed his arms across his chest, brows furrowed as stubbornness and a protective glint filled his eyes. "Not with this."

"But…Uma is my friend." She refused to believe that Uma would do something like this. She'd known her for so long, they'd all shared so many laughs together. She was dead set on it being Mark or Anna. Mark had called her a slut, questioned her authority, and Anna had been the one to come up with that entire scheme at the tavern.

Levi shook his head. "Doesn't matter. Isa…just, trust me on this."

Isa pointed at Hange. "Hange is my friend too, she could easily be doing this."

Hange looked insulted as she pouted. "Hey, I would never."

Isa rolled her eyes. "Hange, making a point here."

She shrugged. "Fair enough."

Levi walked over to place his hands on Isa's shoulders. "Isa. As annoying as Hange is, I know she wouldn't do something like this."

Hange laughed. "Aww, love you too Levi."

"But—"

"Do you trust me?"

She stared up into his eyes, focused only on her. "You know I do, Levi."

"Then trust me on this."

Isa thought his eyes looked as if they were begging her to listen to him. "I…I'll trust you, Levi. We won't say anything to her."

The corner of his mouth quirked up as he pulled away. "Good."

Hange chimed in. "So, how are we supposed to figure out who it is?"

Levi turned to look at her. "We could interrogate them."

Isa didn't like the sound of that. "What if we do and the person catches on that I've told someone?"

Levi shot her a bland look, brow raised. "What do you take me for? You think I'd ask them 'have you written any threatening notes and sent people to their deaths lately'?"

"I…well no, of course not." She grumbled.

"We don't have many options. It's up to you, Isa."

'Are you going to cry, or are you going to fight?'

Doing something, not doing something, gets me the same results.

Fight.

She looked at Levi, determination filling her eyes. "I trust you, Levi. If you think interrogating them is the best way to go, then that's what we'll do."

He reached up and ruffled her hair and she couldn't help the enamored smile that came over her face. "Good. I'll do it under the guise that I'm looking for new members for my squad. Right now, we need to look for motive. If we can find motive, that gets us one step closer to figuring out who this person is."

"Will you be able to get anything from them through interviews like that?"

"Not sure, but it's worth a shot."

After that, Levi left to go relieve Gunther from watching Luna. Before Isa could walk out with him, Hange asked her to stay for a minute.

Hange waited until the door was firmly shut behind Levi and she could hear him walking away before speaking. "Alright, Isa, you have yet to tell me what the hell happened last week. I'm done waiting. I want to know what that was that I walked into."

Isa was not sure she wanted to have this conversation. "I…what do you want to know?"

"I want to know why you were in his bed."

Isa flushed at the blunt way Hange phrased her question. "When…when we got back, I was just sitting in Luna's stall. I didn't feel anything, I just felt so empty. I remember wondering if I'd ever feel again."

She shuddered at the feel of being so void of any emotion, not ever wanting to feel that way again. "Levi found me and took me to his office, offered to go find you, but I begged him not to leave me alone. And when I couldn't get my clothes off because I was shaking so much, he again, offered to go find you, but I didn't want to be alone. I was afraid I'd just wither away into nothing again if he left me by myself."

She hated the memory of how broken she'd felt. "He asked me if I wanted his help, and I said yes, because I couldn't do anything, I had no control over my hands and I couldn't stop the shaking."

Her flush deepened and her arms crossed across her chest as she continued with the next part. "So he…cleaned me up and held me when I finally broke and then held me again in his bed, because I was so cold and just wanted warmth. And well, you know the rest."

Hange's eyes boggled. "He…he bathed you. As in, saw you naked and everything."

Well that's a blunt way to phrase it Hange.

Isa avoided eye contact with her. "I…well…yes."

"I…I'm not sure what to say to that."

A peaceful look filled her face as Isa crossed over to the window overlooking the training grounds. "Hange, he…he helped me a lot that night. If he hadn't found me, I don't know if I'd be where I am today, after only just a week. I felt like an empty shell." She looked over her shoulder at her friend. "There's nothing to say. He helped me, and that's all that matters." She turned back to face outside the window, leaning against the frame.

He...he did so much for me that night. I don't think he even realizes just how much he helped me. And not just that night, but today too. I've...I've never felt this at peace this fast after losing someone.

The man is many things. A grouch. An ass. Abrasive. But he can be so sweet, so kind.

I don't know how anyone could mistake him for someone cold and unfeeling. I may not always be able to tell what it is he's feeling, but I can tell the man carries a lot of emotion. He just keeps it well contained.

How many people would go out of their way like that, just to help a friend? I know it had to have taken him a while to find Ethel's son, where he was buried. And the fact that he went to Erwin with this request. And to have convinced him.

He bought both of them flowers. And they were perfect. I don't think I could have picked better flowers for either of them.

And the way he was willing to just sit there with me, for as long as I needed, holding me, listening to what I had to say.

He's always willing to listen to me, no matter what I talk about. He may tease me about things, but he never does it in a way that's mean. It's like how he used to call Isabel an 'idiot' and I told her that he was doing it out of affection.

The way he sits with me while I watch over Luna, when I know he hates sitting on that filthy floor. But he's never complained, not once.

No one has ever done anything like this for me before.

And…he was so much more...affectionate today. I've never seen him like that.

C-could he? Or was he just trying to be supportive like I was with him after Isabel and Furlan died?

'I can tell he sees you as a good friend.'

That day after I kissed him on my birthday, sitting in the mess hall, I was practically convinced that he felt more for me. I was about to get up and go to him and take a risk.

And then Uma said he sees me as a friend, and that one opinion from her threw everything out the window.

But who do I listen to? Either side could be wrong.

And if he does want more, like they say, what if I mess something up? What if I'm not what he's expecting?

Hange watched as Isa stared out the window, lost in thought. She wanted to press that there was a reason that Levi had done so much to help Isa, that it was more than just simple friendship.

She'd seen it that same day when Isa had broken down in anger, the way he'd held her, the way he'd calmed her, the way he watched her. She knew Levi cared about Isa as more than a friend, she knew he was in love with her, even if he himself didn't know.

But she also knew, from experience, that Isa wouldn't believe it if she told her.

So she'd wait, wait for opportunities where she could maybe give the two a push here and there.

Hange spoke, pulling Isa from her thoughts. "Okay Isa. As long as it was what you wanted, and what you needed, then that's all that matters, and I'm glad that he was able to help you through that."

Isa walked over to Hange, and sat beside her, pulling her in for a hug. "This isn't to say that I don't need you Hange. You're my best friend. It was just…different with him."

Hange hugged her friend tight, head resting on top of Isa's. "I know Isa, you don't have to explain to me. You know I'm here for you, just like I know you're here for me."

"Always Hange, always."

A couple of weeks after visiting Ethel's grave with Levi, Isa needed to get away, needed a break from the constant stress of wondering when this person would strike again. A break from training, a break from everything.

On her free day, she let Hange know where she was going, saddled up Luna, and made her way to Trost as she had so many times before, only this time, she wouldn't have a specific destination.

She walked through Trost, once again, taking everything in around her. She didn't care if Levi always thought she had her head stuck in the clouds. There was just so much to see. Each time she went she always noticed something new. A fountain in the center of the small park. A new shop. A new statue that some artist had made. New faces. New, everything.

As she walked, Isa thought over the past couple of weeks which had been spent interrogating their three suspects through Levi's guise of seeking new members for his special operations squad.

She and Hange had sat in his bedroom listening in as he questioned Anna, Mark, and Uma separately.

At times, she'd had trouble focusing. His voice had lost the warmth she'd grown accustomed to and had taken a commanding tone that had brought all those damn images back to her mind. Those images of him using that commanding tone with her always showed up at the worst possible time.

She'd had to force herself to shove those thoughts to the back of her mind and focus on the conversations coming from Levi's office. He was spending his own time helping her, and it didn't do any of them any good for her to be distracted that way.

They hadn't been able to get much information out of the three. Isa had learned that it's difficult to pull information from people without making them suspicious.

They'd learned that Anna came from Shiganshina and had lost most of her family after Wall Maria fell. When asked why she joined the Scouts, she'd just said it was either this or the Garrison, and she'd thought the Garrison sounded boring. At least in the Scouts she would get to leave the walls.

Mark's interrogation had been another dead end. He'd grown up with Anna in Shiganshina, and had joined the Scouts with her, agreeing with her reasoning that the Garrison sounded boring. Isa honestly thought it sounded as if Mark was in love with Anna, and had followed her here, because he didn't want to leave her alone.

Uma had been exactly what she'd expected. There had been nothing suspicious about her interrogation. She'd wanted to join the Scouts for similar reasons as Isa.

None of the three mentioned that they'd ever been interested in joining the Military Police.

Levi had asked Isa about Uma's note she'd seen that day she'd found Uma crying, and Isa had just shrugged and said that it didn't really say much. Just that Uma's mother had died, and it was signed by her mother's doctor, Grisha Jaeger. Isa remembered that Hange had thought the name sounded familiar, but she hadn't been sure why.

Isa wasn't sure where they were supposed to go from here. They weren't getting anywhere with finding any form of motive, and she was getting antsy in constantly wondering when the person would strike next.

I still don't believe that it's Uma. It has to be Mark or Anna. Mark called me a slut for crying out loud. And Uma said that it was Anna who came up with that whole stupid ultimatum thing. They're the only two people who have been abrasive and cruel towards me.

Sure Uma went along with that plan, but she apologized, even if it felt...off.

But I also promised Levi that I would keep my guard up around her. So I'll do that, until we can prove that it's Mark or Anna writing these notes.

He's spent so much time helping me, and I can't help but feel guilty. So much time away from his own work. I know he has his own things he has to do, yet he never has a problem helping me. He's spent every night the past few weeks sitting with me in Luna's stall.

She thought back to how well he'd handled her when she'd lost control. There had been a part of her that had been kicked into a small room in her mind and locked away, and she'd been completely overtaken by rage and grief.

I was so far gone. I couldn't regain control. How did he manage to pull me back? Every time, whether it's when I'm panicking, or apparently lost in anger, he has the ability to pull me back.

'Come back to me.'

What…what did he mean by that?

She remembered the feel of his voice against her ear, how hushed it had been, so soothing. Something about his voice, about him, always managed to break through whatever wall her mind had thrown up and pulls her out of whatever dark abyss she'd fallen into.

And the way he'd held her. The way she'd felt wrapped in his arms, she'd felt so safe, as if nothing in the world could touch her as long as he was holding her. And she never wanted him to stop holding her.

How many times did he hold me that day? Every time I needed him to hold me, he did so, willingly, no hesitation. Or, the only hesitation came more from him being unsure of how to hold me, yet, he was still willing to do it. Every single time. Even before that day, if I hug him, he lets me.

He never pushes me away.

Why?

And the way he had known that I wouldn't want to leave Luna alone, and he thought ahead and asked two members of his squad to take time away from their day just to sit with my horse, just because he knew that I needed to say goodbye, despite the fact that I was putting it off.

The man once said he wasn't good at comforting, but…everything he did for me that day, just shows me that he is, and maybe he just underestimates himself.

Her mind was taken back to that day where the five of them had come to that festival. Levi as suspicious as ever.

She smiled to herself at the difference in him between then and now. He was like a completely different person. Still gruff and abrasive as ever, but, different.

As she walked, something caught her eye down an alley. When she turned her head, she saw a trio of boys surrounding a little blond-haired boy with blue eyes on the ground.

Anger filled her as she stormed into the alley. "Hey! What do you three think you're doing?"

The tallest boy sneered at her. "Mind your own business lady, or you'll get the same."

Isa laughed humorlessly. "You think I'm scared of a few little punks? I kill titans for a living. I've been on more expeditions than you could possibly dream. I could take you three down in my sleep. I suggest you move along, or I'll be forced to hand you over to Military Police custody for disrupting the peace."

The shorter one of the three paled at the thought. "Shit man, I…I can't get in trouble with my parents again."

"Let's just go, leave the little freak and the runt." They bolted, not wanting to get into further trouble.

When Isa was sure they were gone, she knelt beside Armin who was on the ground. "Armin, are…are you alright?"

He wiped at the dirt on his face. "I'm…I'm fine, this isn't the first time something like this has happened."

She saw the scrapes on his hands and pulled out a cloth and some water from her satchel. "Here, let me clean your hands and face for you. Sit next to me."

She gently wiped off the blood and dirt from his hands and face, grateful that the scrapes didn't look too bad.

"What happened, Armin?"

He shrugged. "Just the usual. I was telling them some things and they didn't like what I had to say, so they reacted in the only way they know how, with violence. People often do that when they don't understand something."

"What were you telling them?" Isa put away the cloth and water, sitting back against the wall of the building.

Armin chewed at his lip, clearly unsure of whether or not he should share.

She patted the ground next to her, and when he scooched closer, she draped an arm over his shoulders. "It's okay, Armin, you don't have to tell me if you don't feel comfortable, but just know, whatever it is, I'm not going to judge you or hurt you, alright?"

"I was telling them about the ocean." He blurted.

She jolted. "The ocean? What's that?"

"This huge body of salt water that's supposed to be somewhere outside the walls. The majority of this world is supposed to be covered in it!"

She watched as his expression morphed from insecurity to this dreamy, almost giddy expression as he talked about the outside world, and she couldn't help but smile at the energy.

The idea of a large body of salt water sounded amazing to Isa. "That, that sounds really fascinating, Armin. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if that were true."

Joy lit up Armin's eyes at the thought that someone agreed with him. "You think so?"

She gave his shoulder an affectionate squeeze. "Absolutely. The squad I'm on, we do a lot of titan research, and I've noticed that there are inconsistencies with some of the things they tell us. I wouldn't be surprised if this was something else they lied about."

The smile on his face grew even wider, his voice and eyes filled with excitement. "That's not even all of it! There's fire water, land made of ice, fields of sand!"

"Where did you hear about this?"

"In this book my grandfather gave me."

"It sounds like the outside world is even bigger than we could imagine. It just makes me want to see it even more."

"What's it like outside the walls?"

She smiled at the childlike innocence in his eyes as he looked up at her. She wondered if she'd ever had that look in her eyes. "It's, it's amazing, honestly, even with the titans. There's something thrilling about riding through the gates each time, even when I'm terrified of what could happen. The air is fresher, cleaner, lighter. I swear the sun is even brighter."

Isa voice was fond as she thought of the memory of her first-time riding outside the walls. It felt as if it were so long ago. "We never get very far, so I honestly can't tell you whether or not any of that exists, but I believe you Armin. There's a lot that we don't know, a lot that we haven't seen, so don't let anyone try to tell you different. Just…just be careful with who you tell this to. There have been instances where people have gone missing for things like this, and I don't want anything to happen to you, Armin."

"Don't worry, Isa, I'll be careful."

She gave his nose a gentle tap. "I can't help but worry, it's what I'm known for, just ask my friends."

He giggled. "I think it's okay to worry about things, it just means you're always thinking. Just, don't let your worries hold you back from doing the things you want to do."

"That, that makes a lot of sense, honestly. I…I definitely do that."

"Why?"

Her brows knit as she tried to figure out how her fears always kept her from the things she truly wanted. "I'm…I'm really not sure. Just sometimes, I get lost in what could happen, and I talk myself out of doing what I want to do."

Armin frowned at the thought. "I feel like you miss out on a lot doing that."

"I probably do, but sometimes, it feels easier in the off chance that something bad does happen, or if it doesn't work out the way I wanted it to."

"But isn't being willing to take risks part of what it means to be a Scout?"

Isa didn't like how good of a point that was. "I…well…to be fair, I think going outside the walls is enough risk for me. I don't know if my nerves could handle too many risks any other time."

"I think that's a good point, but I also think if you're able to take those risks outside the walls, then the risks inside the walls should be easy."

"You would think, but…for me, the risks inside the walls are even harder."

He seemed to think about that for a moment, and she noticed a sad look cross his face.

He turned to look at her. "How did…" He trailed off, fingers fidgeting.

She gave his shoulder a light squeeze. "What is it? Don't ever be afraid to ask me something Armin, it's okay. I'll never judge you."

He looked down at his hands and she could hear the slightest hint of tears in his voice when he spoke. "How did my grandfather die?"

She wasn't sure how much to tell him, how much he could handle. "How…how much do you want to know?"

"Everything, please. Don't hold back."

"Well, we were surrounded. I had sent two of my team to lure away some of the titans, and I stayed behind to take on the rest. When I did, one poked out of the forest that I hadn't seen, it was a smaller one, hidden behind some trees. It went after someone, and your grandfather pushed them out of the way, saving her, but the titan got him instead."

She found that the more she talked about it, the more she told the story, the easier it was to do so, and the less sad she felt about it.

She watched the boy's face carefully, making sure that she hadn't shared too much, but if anything, he looked almost, relieved.

"I…I wish he hadn't had to die, but it sounds like he at least had a death with meaning. He was trying to protect someone else."

She squeezed his shoulder tight. "He definitely was Armin, like a true Scout."

He seemed content with that, to hear that his grandfather had died by trying to save someone else. His next question took her by surprise.

"That man, he was watching you when you came to tell me about my grandfather. Who is he?"

Despite the shock of the question, a shy smile came over her face. "That was Captain Levi. We're…friends."

Armin took note of her expression. "He's the one you love, isn't he?"

A small laugh escaped her. "I…well…" She sighed, ruffling at his hair. "You're incredibly perceptive Armin. But yes, I love him."

"Does he love you?"

Her brows furrowed as a sad light filled her eyes. "I…I don't know, or at least, I don't know if he does the same way I love him. I know he cares about me. You can't really be friends with someone without caring for them. But I don't know if he loves me that way."

Armin thought back to the memory of Levi standing in the door of the lodging area. "He looked…scared when he was watching you. Worried. As if he didn't want to leave you alone, even for a second."

Isa smiled to herself at the idea of Levi being afraid of anything, not believing it could ever be possible. "I…I was having a really bad day, and I wasn't quite myself. I lost two people I cared about while outside the walls that day."

"Who were they?"

"One of my best friends, someone I'd known since training, and an older woman who had become my family, a parental figure of sorts. She got sent out there with all the other people who had no business being there."

"I'm sorry you lost them."

"It's alright, Armin. It's part of what I signed up for when I joined the Scouts. Death, well, it's just a part of life. It's all around us. That's why it's so important to cherish the time with the ones you care about, the ones you love. I learned that recently, or more so, relearned it."

"You're really smart Isa, you know that?"

She chuckled warmly. "I'm glad you think so Armin."

Isa took note of the sun in the sky and saw that it was late afternoon. "I should probably be heading back soon, it's a long ride back to base. Let me walk you back to your friends. And I meant what I said Armin, write to me, come see me, whichever. I'm here for you if you need me."

He wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. "Thanks Isa."

She stroked at the silky hair on his head, an affectionate smile playing on her face. "Of course, sweetheart."

She walked Armin back to the lodging area, enjoying his energy as he told her more about the things he'd read about the outside world.

This child is one of the sweetest people I've ever met. I'm glad I got to meet him.

Later that same night, Levi walked out to the stables where he knew Isa would be waiting. Erwin's damn meeting had taken longer than he expected, so he was getting there later than he would have liked.

He knew she'd most likely be asleep on Luna's neck like she'd been doing for the past few weeks, refusing to leave the mare alone for too long. He honestly didn't blame her, and he'd sit with her for as long as she needed him to, and he'd do his best to make sure nothing happened to her.

He didn't think he could handle it if something happened to her.

We're no closer to figuring out who's writing these damn letters than we were two weeks ago. How is that possible? What are we missing?

What am I missing? I have my suspicions with Uma, but without proof, there's nothing we can do.

I remember that day when Isa came across her crying. Something felt off. It was almost as if she didn't want Isa near her, or for Isa to know that her mother had died. When Isa was reading the note, there was an odd glint in her eye, almost like hatred, disdain.

But why?

I don't know how much longer Isa can take this. I can tell this is taking a toll on her, though she tries to hide it from me.

I don't want to see that look in her eyes ever again. That half-dead look I saw too often in those kids on the streets of the Underground.

She's so full of life, and to see her that way, just…wasn't right. It didn't look right to see her so…broken.

It angered him to no end that there was a person out there trying to tear her down. When she'd shown him the letters, he'd had trouble keeping himself together for her sake. Going on a rampage across the base demanding to know who was writing the notes wouldn't have done her any good.

When he got to Luna's stall, his stomach tightened in knots, a cold dread filling him that he'd only felt once before, on a stormy expedition.

Isa and her horse were nowhere to be seen. The stall was empty. He walked in, half expecting her to be in the corner, but she wasn't.

Where…where the hell is she?

He looked down on the ground and what he saw had his heart freezing. He reached down with a shaky hand to pick up the necklace he'd given her for her birthday. He remembered that tear-filled look of gratitude that he hadn't expected over something so simple. When he'd seen the little necklace, he'd thought it was perfect for her, but he'd expected her to brush it off, certain she'd been given better things in the past.

That night when she'd told him the truth about her past, he'd been shocked, and he'd wanted to go back in time and tear apart whoever it was that had hurt her, including himself. He remembered how abrasive he'd been towards her.

She must be in her room. I'm going to go inside, and she'll be right there, in her room, probably asleep. Luna must be somewhere else.

Not wanting to consider the other possibility yet, he raced inside, and up the steps to Isa's room, door slamming open against the wall, not caring if it woke her, just needing her to be there, and his heart clenched when he saw that her bed was empty.

Hange's office. She…she has to be in Hange's office.

Please be in Hange's office.

He bolted for Hange's office, desperately hoping she'd be there.

Desperately hoping to see those warm, golden brown eyes of hers that always pulled at him…had pulled at him since that very first day when the gentle light of the sunset had turned them into a golden color he'd never seen before and had jarred him in a way he'd never felt.

Desperately hoping to see that smile she gave him whenever he would ruffle her hair or flick her forehead, the simplest, most ridiculous of acts bringing her joy in a way he didn't fully understand, but would gladly keep doing if it meant seeing her smile.

Desperately hoping to hear her sweet voice calling him a grouchy ass in that teasing way of hers that called to a playful side of him he hadn't been fully aware existed until he met her.

Desperately hoping to hear her laugh over the silliest thing he'd say, even if it was just him calling her a pain in the ass.

Desperately hoping to hold her again even if Hange was there to see it, needing to hold her close and breathe in that faint scent of tea and lavender that always followed her.

He didn't always fully understand every emotion that flowed through him whenever he was around her, saw her, held her. Some of them he recognized, but others, the softer, warmer emotions that filled him whenever his eyes met hers, whenever he watched her with her horse, whenever he was around her, whenever he thought of her, he'd never felt anything like that, didn't understand them.

He didn't know what she felt for him. There were times where he thought she maybe wanted more too, but for some reason, with her, he was never sure if she did.

He didn't know or understand any of that, and in that moment he didn't care.

All he knew, was that he needed her to be in Hange's office.

He wasn't sure what he would do if she wasn't.

He burst inside, not bothering to knock, stalking up to Hange and grabbing her by her shoulders. "Hange, have you seen Isa?" His voice had taken on a slight panicked tone, imperceptible to most, but not for Hange.

Hange looked up in horror from the papers she'd just been reading, having just come to an awful realization.

"I thought she got back from Trost hours ago." Her hands shook on the papers she was holding. "Levi, we've…I…I made a mistake. You…you were right."

His eyes narrowed. "Right about what."

"It's…it's Uma."

She watched as his face paled, and he took an unsteady step away from her. "How are you sure?" His tone was sharp.

Hange's voice trembled as she spoke. "I recognized the name of the doctor Isa mentioned yesterday, Grisha Jaeger, but I couldn't remember why. I did some digging, and I found out…Levi, he went missing after Wall Maria fell last year so there's no way that note Isa saw was recent." Fear was slowly filling Hange's eyes as she realized how wrong she'd been.

Her eyes filled at the next bit of information. "I did even more digging…Levi…Uma's mother died the same year we all joined the Scouts, just a few months after. She…she lied about when her mother died."

Her brows furrowed in frustration, in concentration. "And I realized right before you came in…the person writing these notes is angry because Isa made the top ten, which is the only route to the Military Police. Getting into the Military Police means you can take your family into the interior."

Her eyes clenched shut as guilt filled her, her voice growing smaller. "She…she must have wanted to get into the Military Police so that she could get her mother better treatment."

The blood in Levi's veins froze at the information Hange was throwing at him.

Hange's dread filled eyes opened to look at Levi. "I looked up her placement…Levi…she was eleventh, directly after Isa. They were practically tied in terms of score, with Isa just outperforming her with ODM."

Levi's hand was currently clenched in his hair so tight his knuckles were turning white, brows furrowed, and Hange could tell he was on edge and about to burst. She could practically see the energy vibrating off of him.

"I…I can't find her anywhere, Hange." His voice had turned to a whisper that shook, ever so slightly. "I went to meet her out in Luna's stall and she wasn't there, I found her necklace on the ground. She's not in her room, and she's not here. I…I don't know where to look."

She'd never seen him look so…helpless…so unsure. It matched what she was feeling. Isa was in danger, and neither of them had an idea of where to start.

Moblit burst into her office. "Squad Leader, Captain, sorry to interrupt, but Isa's horse is at the front entrance, and she's worked up about something. We can't get her to calm down and she won't let anyone near her."

Determination filled Hange, though the panic remained, as she barked out her orders. "Moblit. Go inform Erwin that Isa has been kidnapped by Uma. Levi and I are going to search for her."

Levi darted out of the room without another word, something instinctual driving him to seek out the mare. He found Luna at the entrance to the base, and it was like Moblit had said. Her panicked whinnies filled the air and anytime a scout got close, she would dance away or rear up, refusing to let anyone near.

When the mare saw him, she barreled over to him, scouts jumping out of the way of her hooves.

He thought he saw fear in the mare's eyes when she grabbed at his jacket with her teeth and pulled, as if trying to tell him to follow her. As she yanked, a memory of Isa stroking Luna's muzzle with that gentle, peaceful look on her face that he never tired of seeing filled his mind, her sweet voice playing in his ears.

'I've always thought that horses understand more than we think. We're constantly underestimating them, Levi. Luna has proven that to me time and time again.'

Without a second thought, he leapt onto Luna holding onto her by her mane, and she bolted away in the direction of the forest, galloping, faster than she'd ever gone, the sound of her hooves connecting with the ground and her huffing breath echoing through the night.

Hange was close behind, wind whipping through her hair, having raced to the stables and grabbed her horse, not bothering to saddle her up. Her horse somehow caught up to Levi, somehow sensing the urgency, as Hange and Levi put their trust in Luna.

It was their only option, and the two could only hope that they were right.

She could see the fear and panic in his eyes. He was as collected as ever, but she could tell he was terrified, and that fear was slowly morphing into a rage she'd never seen from him. A cold fury that could freeze the blood in a person's veins with one glance.

She hoped that fury would never be directed towards her, but his fear matched what she felt. If something happened to Isa, she didn't think she could forgive herself. Levi had been insistent from the start that something about Uma was off, and she hadn't been able to see it. She, like Isa, had been so certain that Anna or Mark had been behind the notes.

Why couldn't I see it? I'm usually good at reading people, their intentions. Hell, I can read Levi of all people. So how could I have misread Uma?

Levi looked down at the mare below him. "Take me to her." His whisper had an almost begging note to it that had Luna's ears flickering back towards him as she pushed for more speed.

Just…just hang on, Isa.

Please…just hang on.

A/N: Thanks for reading! :) Let me know what you thought, if you want! :)