(READ THE FIRST LINE FOR A SPOILER ALERT IF THIS CHAPTER IS TOO MUCH! CONTINUE READING THE FIRST LINE IF YOU WANT THE SPOILER! THIS IS YOUR FIRST AND LAST WARNING!... No? You want the spoiler? OK! I'm writing this in reverse so you can't get it immediately! HAHA! )).gnitteg er'uoy lla s'taht siht daer dna detaehc uoy fI( !gniyas m'I ekil skool ti tahw gniyas ton m'I dna ,flesym naitsirhC a ma I !dne eht ot daer esaelp tub ,wonk I wonk I .ekil skool ti tahw wonk I !DNE EHT OT DAER !DNE EHT OT DAER !DNE EHT OT DAER ,erofeb dias I sA

.

.

.

.

(Now back to the non spoiler)

(Birdo woke up the next morning sleeping on the floor. Forgetting everything about Yoshi from just waking up she quickly threw her arm over to the side trying to tickle him.)

Birdo: "GOTCHA! for the first time I wake up first!"

(Her arm whacks the cold hard floor. Then she remembers.)

Birdo: "Oh... right... Yoshi's evil..."

Tank: "Hi Jelly. You're awake."

Birdo: "Oh... dad saw that?"

Tank: "I know you want him... The good Yoshi. But the good Yoshi was all just a lie. I'm sorry."

Birdo: "Me want someone who really is nice... and cute..."

Tank: "I could try to get you on online dating... but usually it never works..."

Birdo: "I no know... Just want some help..."

Tank: "I know it's a long shot... but we could try the church?"

Birdo: "With Pail right?"

Tank: "Well if it doesn't work we'll know..."

Birdo: "Fine..."

(Birdo slowly walks upstairs and gets in the car with Tank.)

Tank: "Wait... Would you like anything to eat?"

Birdo: "Just a sandwich."

Tank: "Alright. What kind?"

Birdo: "Any. I no care..."

Tank: "I'll make you a cheese sandwich. How many?"

Birdo: "Just 2."

Tank: "Alright."

(Tank goes back inside and makes the sandwiches. He comes back out and gives them to Birdo. Birdo doesn't use her tongue to grab them and tears off bits of one normally with her hands. Tank drives her to the church for the last resort help. Birdo puts down the sandwich half eaten.)

Tank: "Birdo would you like to finish?"

Birdo: "No I full..."

Tank: "I understand. I'll come in with you. It's after hours so you won't be interrupting his sermon."

(Birdo gets out and Tank walks her up to the door and Tank knocks. One of the employees answer.)

Tank: "Hello. Birdo's having some trouble with a divorce. Would Pail be available to help?"

Employee: "How dare you interrupt during the time of the forgiveness of sins! Don't you know after the sermon we always accept indulgences after the sermon!?"

Tank: "Oh. Well he couldn't have time to help her?"

Employee: "Well, the rule is only one. Privacy between her and the preacher. You must wait outside."

Tank: "Alright. Bye Birdo."

Birdo: "Bye..."

(Birdo walks in to meet Pail.)

Pail: "So here you are after the failed marriage. What have I always said?"

Birdo: "It's wrong..."

Pail: "Yup. You have ignored me time and time again. You have resisted my help over and over and you never listened."

Birdo: "I know! Please help!"

Pail: "There is no help for one like you! You only come to get help and not to give. Once you receive it you will never return. You blew your only chance for help. You don't have the money to get forgiveness. IT IS OVER! You are going TO HELL! So get out! Get your sinful presence away from the podium! You're corrupting the money given for forgiveness!"

Birdo: "Alright..."

Pail: "You turned away my offer in the beginning. Now you only come when proven wrong! God would never accept someone like you into his kingdom! You have swyer syndrome, you constantly rebel, you're so stubborn, YOU ARE USELESSS!"

Birdo: "I know..."

Pail: "You know!? SO WHY WOULD YOU COME IN HERE KNOWING HOW PATHETIC YOU ARE!?"

Birdo: "For help."

Pail: "Help!? HELP!? Don't make me laugh! Why in the world would I help you and you not only don't want to, but CAN'T help the lord!?"

Birdo: "I thought... God was just... helped just to help..."

Pail: "What a fairy tale! WHAT ABSOLUTE GARBAGE! HAHAHAHAHAHA! OH I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'D BELIEVE GOD WOULD DO THAT! Who on EARTH helps someone without anything in return!?"

Birdo: "I thought... Yoshi did... I thought Tank... but he my dad..."

Pail: "Tank is not your dad you idiot!"

Birdo: "I know. Just call him that."

Pail: "Do you know who your real parents are!?"

Birdo: "No."

Pail: "You were too much trouble for them! THEY HATED YOU AS A CHILD! AS A BABY THEY SAW HOW WORTHLESS YOU WERE! So they gave you to the orphanage to get rid of you legally! They tried to think of a way to kill you but they couldn't find one! So if your own parents saw your pathetic future, how much more could God see!?"

(Birdo's eyes start to water.)

Birdo: "Please just give me some help I JUST FEELING WORSE!"

Pail: "Why would I ever help you? What benefit would that bring to God!?"

Birdo: "N-nothing..."

Pail: "Exactly. You can't bare kids, you can't serve, you are too dumb to do anything important, you never went to school, all you do IS ACT! YOU'RE AN ACTOR!? How can that help God!? You're good for entertainment! Maybe you could join the circus as the freak you are! Because that's all you'll ever be good for! Entertainment! What a joke! Why would I ever help someone as pathetic as you!?"

Birdo: "Guess you wouldn't... No one will..."

Pail: "Hey you learned something! NO ONE NOT EVEN GOD WILL HELP YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE WORTHLESS!"

Birdo: "What should me do?"

Pail: "Nothing! Just sit in a corner somewhere for the rest of your life! Because you're too dumb and useless to do anything anyway!"

Birdo: "Oh... OK... I hate myself."

Pail: "And rightfully so! Even you see the uselessness inside of you! Boy I'd hate to be you! Praise God I'm not as dumb or weak or pathetic as you! I'd hate to live your life!"

Birdo: "I hate my life..."

Pail: "And Yoshi just put you under some sort of deception to think you were actually useful. HAHAHAHAHA! What a joke! Just get out! You've wasted enough of my time!"

(Birdo walked out with tears over her eyes.)

Tank: "What happened?"

Birdo: "I going to hell. there nothing I can do..."

Tank: "That's not true."

Birdo: "But he right... he was right... About Yoshi"

Tank: "Well... I believe something will give. Something will happen. You won't go to hell..."

Birdo: "I no know what to do..."

Tank: "We'll have our answer soon enough..."

Birdo: "I useless! I CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT!"

Tank: "That's not true."

Birdo: "NAME ONE THING BIRDO GOT RIGHT!?"

Tank: "Well... What about the acting?"

Birdo: "How does that help!? That's only entertainment!"

Tank: "Well... You mar... You..."

Birdo: "I worthless."

Tank: "You're not even 18 yet! You're life is just beginning! I'll never take you here again. I'm so sorry Birdo. I should've known he wouldn't help. He just made it worse."

(Tank started driving Birdo back to his house.)