Welcome back to the second episode of My Hero Abridged, or MHA for short (see what I did there?).
I will also address this now despite nobody asking. All that is included in this story is just dialogue and the original anime, at least that's the thought process on how I view the story. There might be a few extra random scenes, as well as added commentary and random bullshit. So expect something from left field.
That is how the saying goes, right?
Last time on My Hero Abridged:
Izuku bowed over, cried, and gave an epic shout of determination and release of his past trauma, glad that someone finally believed.
Now!:
Izuku bowed over again, cried again, and gave an epic shout of determination and release of his past trauma, glad that someone finally believed… again.
All Might looked down at him, before thinking to himself, 'Serious deja vu moment here.'
"Thank you for believing in me All Might," Izuku told his idol, before looking up at him while his tears stopped coming up. "But how do I-"
"Train?" All Might finished. "Why it's simple." Light began to shine in his outstretched hand, as he said, "It's time for an anime timeskip! Heed my call One For All, and fuck up all physics so he can win this!"
"Why does that rhyme?" Izuku asked before a drum was smacked and suddenly he was at a beach in sweatpants he owned as well as looking jacked and not wearing a shirt. "What the hell?!"
"Yeah, One For All is capable of miracles," All Might said, before Izuku threw up violently onto the sand. "Except it has some nasty side effects such as the one you're experiencing now."
"My brain feels like it's about to pop…" Izuku said weakly.
"That's because it's adding all the memories you'd have without the timeskip!" All Might said. "It's a painful-ah shit, I missed Melissa's birthday?! Son of a bitch!"
"Who?" Izuku asked.
"My niece though we're not related in the slightest," All Might replied.
"C-Can we rewind it?" Izuku asked.
"Eh, fuck it," All Might said before he pulled out a piece of his hair.
And after going through the timeskip normally, they came back to the moment the timeskip brought them to beforehand.
"And we're back!" Izuku said to All Might.
"Yep!" All Might said.
"Yeah, thanks for inviting me to the party and I gotta say, Melissa is cute," Izuku said. "But Kacchan knows how to please me and I'm already dating him, so there's that."
"Say what now?" All Might asked.
"Nothing! Nothing important at all!"
"Eh, fuck it," All Might plucked out another strand of hair.
"Why are you rewinding time?" Izuku asked.
"I'm not, I'm giving you One For All," All Might said. "Now eat the hair."
"No, that's just gross!" Izuku retorted.
"But you need to consume my DNA and then you'll get One For All!"
"Anything but hair!"
"Fine, you fucking pussy. Have some blood, filthy vampire…"
"I heard that!"
And so an hour or two later, Izuku made his way to UA, and was at the gate. "Well, this is where my story begins."
"Alright Izuku!" Izuku's boyfriend Katsuki Bakugo said as he walked into UA. "Time for simple instructions! Fight, write, fly, don't die, and if you live, I'll treat you to something rather nice."
"Oddly specific," Izuku said, kinda scared about what is to come.
"Just don't do something stupid! Or else I might…" Bakugo looked at Izuku with a psychotic smirk. "...get aggressive."
"Oh my, I'll make sure to be ready," Izuku said as he took a step to follow Bakugo before Izuku fell forward. "Fuck."
Then he didn't hit the ground and was staring at it. "...what the-"
"Hi there!" The voice of Ochaco Uraraka said as she stood him up and he regained gravity over himself. "I'm Ochaco Uraraka! Don't die during the entrance exam!" She then walked away.
Izuku was questioning what the fuck he just witnessed and who the hell he just met.
After entering the auditorium, he sat next to his boyfriend and they were silent as Present Mic began to explain the exam.
"So, I met a girl and I think she's cute," Izuku told Bakugo.
"Already thinking of leaving me? That's harsh."
"No no no, I'm just saying I met someone who you'd agree is cute, especially since you mentioned something about brunettes being badass on occasions, or just cute in general."
"Is it the girl with the mushroom bag over there?" Bakugo pointed to the right side of the auditorium, at a girl who looked very similar to Uraraka, but was due to height, the mushroom bag, and the school uniform she wore.
"No, but she does look like Uraraka. Probably really distant cousins." Izuku pointed at Uraraka who was on the left side of the auditorium, and Bakugo nodded.
"...she gives off the vibes of the protagonist's love interest." Bakugo nodded a bit more. "...I think I'm interested in her too, like you."
"...please don't say-"
"I am, and if she is into you too, she's more than welcome after I establish ground rules."
"Son of a-"
Suddenly another contestant raised their hand and the contestant, which was Iida, vibrated violently before bringing his hand down as he pointed at Izuku. "No cussing in the middle of this school! This is a 'Christian Minecraft Server' as people tend to refer to it as."
"Listen up, examinee. This isn't a 'Christian Minecraft Server'!" Present Mic told Iida. "In fact, this place is about as bad as Anime Voice Camp, where we find humor in dark humor and a lot of other dark things!"
"Nani?!" Iida exclaimed.
"And now it's time for a manhunt!" Present Mic said as he clicked a button and they all were in different groups at different gates.
"What the hell does that even mean?!" Izuku asked before Iida placed a hand on his shoulder.
"It means grow up and prepare to get your rear end handed to you for disrespecting the Christians we have among us," Iida retorted.
"Wait, there are Christians in Japan?" Izuku questioned as everyone ran away into the fake city and he was forced to catch up. "YOU BASTARDS!"
He found a robot and the robot said, "It's time for some maaaaaaaaath! What's 1 + 1947947592704?"
"194794759270-"
"TOO SLOW!" The robot charged at him and then got blown up.
A blond teen with a large belt looked at Izuku and laughed. "Mon mon mon, on aurait dit que quelqu'un avait besoin... d'un héros! Mauvaises blagues à part, bonne chance pour la suite de l'examen. La plupart des robots ont été détruits. Au revoir!" The teen then bounded away, leaving Izuku in silence.
"..." Izuku stared at the teen for a moment before saying, "Was he insulting me?!"
He ran ahead and made it to a warzone that clearly had its battle recently finished as a lot of broken robots everywhere.
"Well, I'm screwed," Izuku stated.
Then the ground started rumbling and a giant robot appeared.
"Double screwed," Izuku added as he fell on his ass and everyone began running away.
"Ow…" Izuku recognized that voice and saw Uraraka under a robot, probably unconscious from the shock of the robot landing on top of her. "Don't… do that…"
She was calling for help.
"YOLO!" Izuku yelled as he suddenly jumped high into the air and punched the robot and destroyed it. "I-I did it! I actually used All Might's-!" He then slammed into the ground and yelled in pain from the impact, as well as the realization that his right arm and both legs were broken. "OH SON OF A BI-!"
Yeah yeah, slightly shorter chapter that doesn't cover much story. This is a story for humor for a reason. It's also just to post something random out there.
And of course I pointed out Kinoko Komori from Class 1B. She and Uraraka do have somewhat similar hairstyles. Keyword: somewhat.
Now, what does everyone think the personalities of 1A's students are gonna be?