Independence

Although we were in the north wing, our bedroom window had the misfortune to face east. Zelda's closed eyelashes turned golden with the first ray of sunlight.

I wanted to get up to close the curtains, but she grunted without opening her eyes and grabbed my arm to wrap herself with me. I didn't know if she was sick. She didn't look sick at the time, but the night before...

"Morning, Big-Ears... " she whispered, her voice hoarse with sleep.

"Zelda, how do you-

"I'm fine. As long as I can be like this I'll be fine, I promise."

I had the feeling that something wasn't right, but of course, so many things had happened in such a short time... The Black Tower of Ikana, the attack on the Nest and Nightfall, Hyrule's kandar, uncle Kevan... It was very confusing, as if I had lived years in a few days. She was asleep but restless, she still had one foot in her dreams and the other in the real world.

"Link, you're not going to leave me, are you?"

"What?"

"Our marriage, I don't know what you talked to Father and Kahen."

As she was still half asleep I thought about cracking a joke like she sometimes did, but from the way she was cuddling with me, I realised it wasn't a good idea.

"I will never leave you."

"Really?"

"Yes, really."

"Not even if they attack the Nest again, or you have to go to war."

"Never, I swear."

I kissed her head and noticed her breathing calmly again.

"Thank you," she whispered, and relaxed to fall asleep.

Later I got up, before her, but I waited for her and gave her time to sleep longer and decide to leave the bed whenever she wanted, in case she was really sick or something wrong happened to her.

That morning we had breakfast together. The table was long enough to accommodate my family twice over, but we sat together in a corner, the one closest to the fireplace. She told me that the day before she had gone with Gae to talk about their sibling stuff, that they'd barely had time to be together to catch up on everything. I told her about my meeting with the king and her older brother. It was vague and boring, the king didn't put me at a crossroads or ask me to return my wife's hand or any of those ideas that sometimes haunted me. Nor was it an opportunity for Prince Kahen to throw the conflict with the West in my face, nor did he attack me for shooting an arrow at him. It was... boring. King Rhoam asked my opinion on the Hyrule kandar (he didn't call it that way). Because I was polite I didn't tell him that I thought it was a big waste of time for a bunch of prissy weirdos to complain about how little gold they had in their bags (so they do look like barbarians), so I just said I hoped we'd soon be chasing the enemy, that's all. And then Prince Kahen started talking about plans and ideas he'd come up with.

"Which plans and ideas?" Zelda asked, as she nibbled on a strawberry the same as a bird pecked at the fruit of a tree.

"He wants to send troops here and there. I don't know, I don't know the geography of your country."

She frowned and thought about it.

"Do you think that's wrong?" I stole a strawberry from her plate to eat the whole thing because I was craving it just by looking at it and it made me desperate to see her eating so slowly.

"No, it's not that."

"A hawk arrived yesterday with a message from Lord Tyto. Everyone's safe. My Dad is recovering well and with the help of the rito Nightfall is raising again."

"I'm very glad to hear that," she smiled, and reached out to remove a seed or something that was on my face.

"Your father asked me if I wanted to lead my own expedition through Hyrule."

"With Kahen?"

"No. They want to form several groups, each with a leader. I could choose my own group, that's what your father said."

"And since everything is fine in the West you are considering it...," she sensed. Her eyes shone a little. I grabbed her hand.

"Don't be afraid. I don't know if it's best to leave you behind either."

"I'm not useless, you know if I have to, I can defend myself."

"Anyway, Fridd and Ardren will have to evaluate whether or not you're ready for that."

"Fridd... and Ardren?" Her eyes moved as if searching for a million answers to that. It made me burst out laughing, I couldn't take it anymore.

"Aren't you laughing at this? You who always laugh at everything weirder..."

"Link, it's not funny, this is serious," she blurted out, pretending to be offended "Father would never let me be part of those expeditions anyway."

"Don't forget the lesson two on Hyrule."

"Lesson two..."

"You'll have to decide."

I got her smile back and it was as if the sun had risen a second time.

"Then you know I'm clear about the decision."

Just then the boys showed up, and they took away my chance to stay alone with Zelda.

"Captain, can we talk?" Fridd asked.

"We're sick of being here," Ardren anticipated, with a mocking smile. Fridd elbowed his stomach.

"I let you talk quietly, I'm done with breakfast," Zelda got up and dropped her napkin on the table, "I have to look for Impa."

"No, Your Highness, please," Fridd said, making a fuss with his hands, "we can wait, we are sorry to have interrupted you."

"Again with the Highness thing?" She snorted and left us alone.

Fridd and Ardren sat down to rush with me the remains of breakfast.

"Link, we're sick of being here," Ardren repeated, this time with his mouth full, "we're not contributing anything and time flies."

" You say that as if sleeping and eating your fill was a punishment..."

"It's not that. It is that-

"I know. I'm sick of it too," I admitted, "but it's Zelda's family, and it's rude to leave when we think so. Besides, King Rhoam has offered us to participate in his plans."

"What plans?"

I didn't get too far ahead of myself, they were a couple of loudmouths. I just told them that we were finally leaving the luxury and tranquillity of Hyrule Castle. They wouldn't have to worry about putting on a good face if they were tired, they could wear their furs again, and Fridd would finally breathe. He was going to die of thirst not to drink from the castle's metal goblets to avoid the bad omen.

I wasn't clear on our course. What the hell. I was clear, but I was afraid to admit it. I was afraid to give in to my personal desires. Hateno was a region of Hyrule like any other, so if I happened to go there to investigate, I would be fulfilling the plan of the king and the prince. And I could be reunited with my family. It wasn't such a selfish wish, I'd be fulfilling what I'd promised.

I went to the room where I was summoned by the king of Hyrule. He'd decided to name several captains to lead the mission to find enemy armies, to search every corner of the kingdom. I wouldn't speak of my preferences; my experience with the mountain leaders had shown me that to show my intentions too soon might endanger them. So I would wait, and if no one travelled to Hateno then I could volunteer for that.

The hall seemed empty, it took me a while to realise that there was only someone else waiting, next to one of those huge stained-glass windows that were all over the castle. Shit. It was the gerudo guy.

"Prince Link," he said, with a bow.

"It's Captain Link."

"Prince Link. You're prince consort, don't forget."

"Yes. I don't forget. How are you doing, Prince Ganondorf?"

"Ah. My title is obsolete," he smiled, "Ganondorf is enough."

I forced a smile. I was sick of the strange formalities. In the West, people called you by your name, that's all. I only knew of one title-obsessed barbarian, that jerk Kruu, who forced his men to call him "Chief Kruu". True, I used to be called Captain Link, but it was almost vulgar, not that people forced themselves to follow protocol when they said it.

"No sign of your enemies," he continued. He spoke a lot, it wasn't the first time I'd observed it, "it looks like they've been swallowed up by the earth."

"Yes, that also seemed in the West, until they came out of their hiding place and smashed it all to pieces."

"I envy you."

I looked at him in case he was making fun of me and inadvertently took my hand to my belt. I had no sword, I forgot.

"Do you envy the mess that Ikanah has left on my country?"

"No, that's not it," he smiled, without taking off the eyes of the coloured window, "you are very fortunate in many ways. But it usually happens that fortune smiles at the most unconscious. Because you're not even aware of your luck. You focus on one detail, like that attack on the West."

"Sure, one detail..."

He was definitely an asshole.

"An attack is a passing thing," he continued, "a strong people know how to raise and heal their wounds."

I nodded. If he knew... we've lost many things in the war, and it was just the beginning.

"You still don't understand your fortune," he smiled again, and looked at me for a moment, before he looked back at the window, "your fortune, Prince Link, is kind of abnormal. It seems as if someone, on the other hand, played with the threads of people's lives in the world and placed them in the right place at the right time. Some, like you, are the lucky ones, the ones touched by the goddesses. Others, like me, for some reason I can't understand, will never get anything. No matter what we fight, how kind we try to be, how strong, how persistent... Never mind. We will never get anything, just because it seems that fate is bent on truncating our goal over and over again. And... believe me: it's sad and exhausting. And it's hard to get over that reality."

"You see reality in a very dark way. You're not a bastard, I see. You're young and strong, a warrior. Most of the guys who have come to this kandar haven't touched a sword in their lives. And you command a strong people, of warrior women. They follow you and they are loyal to you. Not everyone in Hyrule is like that, in the Citadel I have seen people sleeping in the streets, wrapped in rags. It's very strange, I can't think of how such a rich country can give rise to something like this. In the West, the one who has nothing becomes a hunter, lives from the woods. It's better than being lying on the floor of a big city like a sick dog."

"Is there no poverty in the West? Wow, what a utopia..."

"It's not that there is no poverty. It's just that there is no great wealth either, unlike here. And those who have less are also happy. Nobody aspires to live in a castle like this. In fact, those who have more are often worse off."

Like the avaricious Kruu and his troop of gold plunderers. Of course, I kept that detail to myself. I never talked about internal tensions with foreigners, let alone with a guy as weird as him.

"In the West even the poorest is happy because it is an independent people."

"I don't understand..."

"Your fortune, once again. Your people have not been crushed by King Rhoam's fist, like mine. You have persisted, you have fewer resources, but you go ahead without being held accountable to another king. And you, despite claiming that there are no castles in the West, you own one."

"Well, it's more of a tower with a wall, it's not a castle. It gives more work that takes it away."

"You are a lord, don't pretend to deceive yourself," he said coldly, "and you're also a warrior captain, quite skilled by what they say."

"No one has given me that."

It looked like I was hearing Ardren... "Captain, what a sword-handling, you are Or's chosen one!" But there is no gift from Or, nor from the goddesses. I had practiced countless hours. I practiced until my hands were bleeding, until I couldn't get off the ground. I did it with sun, rain and snow, no matter the day. Others preferred to be in the tavern, or singing songs, like Ardren. And the castle thing... well, yes, I owned a fortress but I also had responsibilities and headaches.

"Tell me, Prince Link, what would have happened if the West were not independent if it had to surrender to King Rhoam?"

"I don't know."

" Ever since I was born, I have worked hard, every day. I could have been born on any day and the women of the tribe would have sent me out of Gerudo City like other men and as is tradition. I would have been a trader, an explorer, a soldier? Who knows? But I was born under the moon of Din, on the eighth day of the eighth month of the eighth millennium, when the star of the eighth matriarch shone high above the highest peak of our mountain range. A sign. The hateful thread of fate."

"What does that mean?"

"That I should rule the tribe. Males don't usually do it unless they're born in those circumstances. It almost never happens, so it's kind of weird and exceptional."

"And isn't that fortune?"

He let out a laugh that rumbled into the empty room.

"It could be. But it turns out that for my tribe, a matriarchal tribe, having a man as ruler is a symbol of bad omen. Bad omen! Who sees the birth of an innocent child as a bad omen? Who the hell chooses how, when, and where to be born? Because I assure you that if I could choose it, I would change for you today."

"No one chooses where to be born, but what to do with their life," I said, trying to sound safe. Although, on the other hand, I understood that the life of someone born under a symbol of superstition shouldn't be easy.

"... and my people. Ha." He rested his fist on the window, "the only thing that made them feel strong and proud was that they were a people, the Gerudo people. And I couldn't even get that for them. In all this time I haven't been able to achieve anything worthwhile for my people, nothing to silence the superstitions."

"I can understand it and I'm sorry, really."

"I tried to get a marriage to guarantee us a status, as we couldn't remain a separate state, at least we'd have a better position than other regions of Hyrule. So as soon as Princess Zelda was of legal age, I formally introduced myself to court her. But she's... how to say it?"

"Difficult?"

I couldn't even imagine trying to compete with other men to try to court Zelda. I'd have been the most pathetic of all the suitors, without a doubt.

"She doesn't like me, it's obvious. She never liked me, and that made things difficult for me. But I thought that over time and insistence she might consider my proposal, I would have been very flexible with her wishes. And besides, I thought political stability would convince the king. But he no longer saw us as a threat. It's just that he didn't even see us as an option. We were just one more tribe under his command, and that detract from us in the face of other suitors, princes and kings of independent countries."

"You're wrong, Zelda had already chosen another guy. That Prince Richard, she told me herself. So I don't think that thing you said had anything to do with it."

"And without doing anything, without going through a courtship, now she's yours. You didn't even have to fight to get her. And your marriage is what assures you the independence of the West. All because of a stupid hunting accident. An accident... the crown prince wounded by you! And old Rhoam delivers his daughter on a tray... Goddesses..." he laughed, shaking his head.

"She would never have chosen me if I'd tried to court her."

"But she loves you, I can see it. You are also fortunate in that, your marriage of convenience has turned out to be a kind of gift from the Goddesses."

"It wasn't easy, it's hard for both of us," I said, clenching my fists, "we tried to fulfil our obligation. And that... I can't explain it better," I snorted, "but doing the right thing has been bringing us closer."

"So you have no idea how love works, interesting...," he mocked.

I was sure he wasn't interested in Zelda in a romantic way, he wasn't a threat to me in that sense, but seeing him so frustrated made me feel sorry for him. He wasn't a bad guy, and I really thought he was a valid and intelligent warrior. Much more so than others who had visited the Hyrule kandar.

"Prince Ganondorf, I think I understand you. I understand your pain and that all you have done so far is for your people. But you only see what you want. You know? Or can only see by one of his two eyes. He tore himself off the other because he said that sometimes seeing too much concealed the truth, that's how he can impart his justice, looking through a healthy eye and a blind eye, to remind himself that not everything is what it seems. You're just looking through the eye of appearance, you should try looking through the eye of truth. It may seem that in my life it's all privilege, or that everything has been easy for me. You deceive yourself. Just as you deceive yourself into believing that you have to do something extraordinary for your women to admire you. I'm sure they already do, I still remember their cold daggers around my neck, when they were defending you in the rito village."

"You may be partly right. But the wheel has been spinning for a long time. It's too late for a lot of things."

"Late?"

"Think about it. Think about what would happen if King Rhoam took over the West, if he were the king of Fort Hawk and the Eagle's Nest."

I was going to answer, but for him the conversation was over.

I found it hard to concentrate on the meeting afterwards, with the other captains, Prince Kahen and King Rhoam. I kept thinking about what Ganondorf had said. He was as absent as I was, nodding and smiling, but his eyes were not looking at anything in the room. I only saw him flinch a little when the king made some vague mention of his family's "intrinsic" powers or something... I didn't really understand what he meant by intrinsic powers either. Couldn't everyone in Hyrule talk like normal people do? Goddesses, I had the feeling that every sentence was a riddle full of mysteries.

In the end the prince and the king had already decided how to divide the troops to go in search of the enemy. The region of Necluda fell to one of their captains of the royal guard. I was assigned to the Akalla region, namely, I wouldn't have minded anywhere because I didn't really know any of them. In Akalla there was a castle with a powerful defence, so I was told, and they didn't fear too much for the enemy, but it didn't hurt to ask just in case. Two huge gorons would be travelling with us, and... Well, I didn't mention to the king my intention to take my wife with me until the end of the meeting, once we were alone.

"It's completely outlandish," he said, twisting the gesture.

"You said that region is safe."

"Safer is Hyrule Castle. Here she would be protected by all my personal guard, plus the sheikah. She'd stay with her younger brother, happy and calm. You must look further, Captain Link, it's important that you keep perspective."

"I keep perspective. She's seen the wraiths, she can help us find them. She knows Hyrule and has told me that she has made many expeditions before, to research. I'll take my men, the more those soldiers you've assigned us."

"I disapprove of it."

"She wants to travel with me."

"This journey better be productive," the king snorted, reluctantly accepting.

"We'll send messages, nothing bad will happen to her as long as she's with me."

"I hope so."

We were going to leave the castle that same day. However, I left room for Zelda to say goodbye to her brother Gae, who had a sort of desolate look on his face when he realised that we were all leaving and he had to stay there for good. The other one who complained was Ardren, when he saw that Impa wasn't coming with us.

"And where does she go?"

"She travels with Prince Kahen."

"Where to?"

"What the hell do I know... to the woods I don't know where."

"Damn Link, you should pay more attention to these things."

Zelda returned to her comfortable travel clothes, the ones she had brought from the Nest, although I saw that she kept too many things in her bag. I insisted that it was better to travel light, with the essentials, but I saw her packing a kind of fur coat for snow, boots, a dress... Goddesses. And the worst part is that she didn't take the clear nightgown, she packed two horrible fur-lined boots that weighed like a ton and there was no room for the nightgown.

"Why are you making such a face, don't you plan to pack your luggage?" she grumbled.

"I've already done that."

She looked to the bed, where my travel backpack was.

"Just that tiny bag? Aren't you packing any coat? What if it's cold? Akalla region is cold, it snows in spring. It's way north. You're very cold and you're going to regret it."

"I'll figure something out. Whenever you're going to explore around... do you carry so many things with you?"

"No, I don't. But we don't know how long this journey can be and I'd rather be prepared, not like you."

"You know I can be fine just with my furs, in fact, I miss them. On the other hand, you're going to have to carry that huge bag on your own, because we're not travelling in a wagon this time."

She hesitated for a moment, but she pushed some ideas out of her head and at last, at last, finished packing things.

"You could help me, because it weighs a lot," she said, arms akimbo, observing the outcome of her work. I don't even know how she managed to close the bag.

"I told you, you shouldn't have packed so many things," I tried to lift her bag and... "What have you got in here? Stones?"

"It's a few books from my library. Maybe I can do without a volume..."

"By Or, what the hell do you want to bring books for?"

"In case I have to consult something. I'm going to ask Father to let us take one of the charging mules. That way I won't have to hear you whining because my luggage weighs too much for a man…"

As long as I didn't hear her protest, I let her do that. The mules would not slow us down as much as travelling with a wagon and could also carry the camping tents.

It was past afternoon when we left the castle. We didn't go out through the main gate, nor did we cross the Citadel. Instead, we marched hooded, with the horses and mules, and set off along a path that led to a dock, a hidden place between the north and west wing, an underground passage. The stone corridors zigzagged along torchlit walls, and at the end of the path was water, water from the moat that surrounded the castle. Huge barges were waiting for us at the quay, big enough to take several men on horseback out of there. In a couple of rides we were all out of the castle, and off we went to the north and east, Zelda said.

We rode until it began to get dark, and when it did we came to a sort of inn, near a river. It smelled of good food, and the soldiers who came with us said there would be comfortable beds for everyone.

Zelda had been chatty and singing all day, like some kind of happy bird, flitting from place to place, talking all the time. Nothing like the Zelda who had travelled with me from the Eagle's Nest to the castle. I guess she was really looking forward to being a part of all this in some way, although I was still terrified that something would happen to her because of me.

"Link, wait," she stopped me, pulling my cloak, "I can't stay there, in the inn."

I stared at her without understanding, all her joy seemed to have suddenly gone away.

"I don't want anyone to recognise me," she clarified, in the face of my silence.

"Sorry, I hadn't thought about it."

"We can camp nearby, it's more awkward, I know."

"No, it's okay with me, but I'm worried that you're uncomfortable being able to sleep in a better place."

"I won't be. I've travelled a lot with the sheikah. We always camped for this inconvenience of mine. Sometimes I'm a hindrance."

"Okay, I'll let Fridd and Ardren know so they're with us. It's better to set up camp all four of us. The rest can stay at the inn."

Before long we were able to set up the tents and lit a bonfire. One of the gorons approached us from the inn, bringing with him something that smelled too good.

"Goro-fish," he said, and handed us several skewers of trout roasted with vegetables that smelled of glory.

"Thank you!" Ardren exclaimed, almost as happy as I was to see so much food.

"Don't you want some for you, buddy?" I offered, seeing him leave with no food.

"It's not goron food."

He rolled away, lifting an immense dust. Those gorons were amazing, I wish there were some living in the West. Zelda was laughing next to me.

"Someday you'll understand about goron food."

We had dinner and discussed the next day's route. Zelda proposed that we go through a forest step, she said she knew the road well. Fridd and Ardren seemed happy to be able to sleep outside, outside the castle walls and protocols, so Zelda regained all her good humour when she saw that they were better off in the camp than in the inn. We took turns on watch, and luckily I got the last one, so I could sleep for several hours in a row, in my tent... with my wife.

At first we lay on our backs, each on our side of the tent without saying anything. I thought she would fall asleep instantly, but her eyes were wide open, just like mine. I kept thinking about the nightgown and why the hell she'd left it behind. She reached out an arm and inadvertently hit my head.

"Sorry, there's not much space."

I slid a little more towards her and she started stroking my hair. And then she happened to touch my ears, and that had an immediate effect on another part of me. Slightly blinded by the need, I leaned over her to kiss her. She seemed to expect me to do it because she gave herself to me without hesitation. She didn't have the nightgown on, but she only slept in her vest, so it was actually much easier to slip my hands under her clothes. Goddesses, she was so soft, I wanted to caress her chest again without the effect of the mead.

"Link, wait," she murmured. Although she made other noises that showed that she didn't care what I was doing with her, "just… wait for a moment..."

I separated from her a little and she let go of one of her laughs. Then she gently pushed me and I fell on my back, beside her, more in need than ever. Apparently she was amused by my need.

"Don't get angry, but they can hear us," she whispered, touching my ear again.

"Who? Who can hear us?"

"Schh, speak lower. Well, Fridd. He's near the tents, it's his watch shift."

"I'll tell him to go."

"No! Don't be an idiot. If you tell him to go, he'll know why."

"So… what?"

I didn't understand her. Did she or didn't she want us to be intimate? If it bothered her that they heard us it had an easy solution... Women.

"I'm embarrassed that he knows what you and I are doing here together... I'm embarrassed, that's all."

"But it's normal for you and me... you're my wife. Fridd won't be surprised by that."

"I know, you fool. But I don't feel comfortable. It's like we're not alone. Even if he's away so he doesn't hear us, he'll know."

"He'll know..."

"Yes. He'll know what we're doing and that's-

"Okay, okay. It is okay. He'll know, so we won't do anything. Understood."

I grabbed the blanket and threw it over me. Zelda turned and grabbed my arm. She kissed my cheek and then snuggled up next to me.

"Are you mad at me?" she whispered on my ear, tickling the whole of me.

"No."

"The women of the West don't care if they're heard."

"No, I don't think they care," I grumbled.

"On our wedding night we were not alone. I'm so glad, well, I like what we're starting to do together. But I'd like it to be just between you and me."

That was a good move on her part. I also wanted to keep the ghosts of our blood marriage as far away as possible, so I gave in at last, and surrounded her to snuggle more. We closed our eyes, but neither of us managed to sleep. I wasn't asleep, and from her breathing, I was pretty sure she wasn't either.

"Zelda."

"You should sleep now or your ears will grow out of control."

"Why does your father go around conquering peoples who stand well on their own?"

"What about that question? What's that all about now?"

"It's just to know. Why Hyrule tries to conquer others... I don't quite understand."

"Hyrule has always been a great kingdom, made up of different peoples."

"Okay, but why?"

She sighed and moved to rest her chin on my chest.

"To help them. No doubt Father does it to solve any problem or conflict, or to offer help to those who need it. That union makes the kingdom stronger and puts the people safe from danger."

"And the West? Would the West be stronger if it were under Hyrule's command?"

"Don't think strange things, Link. Father has never wanted to conquer the West."

She lay back down on top of me, ending the conversation. It took me much longer to fall asleep than she did, in fact, I hardly slept a wink because... I couldn't believe it, but actually, Prince Ganondorf was right.