Buck Merril

Disaster came, as it often did in Oklahoma, out of a slate grey sky.

A storm was threatening and the air was prickly with electricity that Buck could feel in his nerves. He was burning some garbage out the back of his place one morning when he heard an engine.

He recognised the Randle Kid's car. But it wasn't the Randle kid who got out. It was the Johnny Cade kid. The one that always had Dally climbing the walls. He looked freaked out. Nothin' new there. He always looked that way.

Although… There was something different about him today. He didn't look as emaciated as usual and he was wearing decent clothes instead of the threadbare, outgrown jeans and jacket he usually did.

"Hey." Buck said, blinking against the smoke. "Dally 'aint here. He's workin' early today."

"I ain't lookin' for Dally I'm lookin' for Hattie." The kid said, casting a worried eye back at the car. He'd left the engine running.

"She's sleepin'." Buck said suspiciously. "What you want with her?" Hattie had been working late last night. She'd been working solo 'cause Suki, her friend, was sick. They usually worked in tandem and split the dough, one in the room while the other hooked a new guy downstairs. Buck had kept his ears open but there hadn't been any trouble as far as he could tell.

"I need her help with somethin'." The kid insisted.

"Aint you a little young for that?" Buck said, then remembered what Jasper had caught him at recently… What had sent Dally on such a trip. Maybe not.

Hell! seeing the boy now, looking like such a baby, it made him more than a little sick.

Buck had no problem with that game for the willing, but never for kids. Also… He knew the Father, to look at, from local dives and bars. He was blacklisted from most but sometimes still showed up. Prick shouldn't have been allowed within a mile of women or children that was for sure.

The boy's hostile little face screwed up in disgust. "Not that… I need… Look it's real important… Can you get her for me please?"

"Naw Kid I'm busy… Come back later."

The brat just stuck out his sharp chin and stood there, arms crossed. Buck thought it might've been the first time he'd seen him act like anything besides a frightened rabbit.

"Go knock on her door then." Buck shrugged. "Don't say I didn't warn ya, she's like an angry bear in the mornin'."

The boy looked back at the car one more time then, leaving it running, he ran around front and Buck heard the door slam.

He put some more junk on the fire and sauntered over to the car. He opened the door and killed the engine. As soon as he did, there was a sound from a box that had been wedged in front of the passenger seat. He peered in. His mouth dropped open.

"Well I'll be dammed!"

He went back inside carrying the screaming baby. Johnny ran down the stairs like the Devil was after him. Followed by Hattie, half asleep, still in her work clothes from the night before.

"This yours?" He asked, holding the baby out to Johnny, who grabbed her and held her close to his chest rocking her and kissing her little head. "My sister's sick!" He said, his voice cracking. He glared up at Buck like he'd personally given her rabies. "She's been screamin' all night! It don't sound right! I need…" He swallowed, like he was scared to say it.

"You need a ride to the hospital." Buck finished for him. He checked his pocket for car keys… Then frowned in confusion, the boy had driven here.

"No Buck!" Hattie said. "Look at her for God's sake!"

He looked again at the crying infant. "Ah! I see. You need Hattie specifically to take her."

Hattie approached Johnny and gently took the baby from him. "Where's your Momma Honey?" She asked him.

"She took off." Johnny said in a small voice, looking at his feet. "She fell off the wagon again… Please don't tell anyone! I've been living with the Curtis brothers and we've been just fine until now! Only everyone was workin' today and Dally was meant to come over but he must've been called in early and she was screamin' and screamin'…" He looked like he was about to start sobbing. "I promise I'm takin' good care of her! Don't tell the cops!"

Hell those big dark eyes could melt steel. Buck shook his head. "Johnny… I got Hattie and Suki workin' from my upstairs, I sell moonshine at night and smoke reefer every day. You think I'm telling' the cops anythin' about anythin'?"

The kid wilted in relief. "Thanks Man!" He exhaled deeply.

Hattie was examining the baby with a frown. "She's pulling up her legs… Maybe her stomach hurts?" She said. "I'm gonna get my real clothes on and you can explain on the way… What do you think Buck? Greenwood?"

"Yeah." Greenwood clinic was cheap and no one asked questions most of the time.

xxxxxxxxxx

Johnny had told them the basics on the drive over. Buck watched him in the rearview mirror. He sat on the back seat holding the baby, rocking her quiet, whispering to her. The cardboard box was beside him on the seat. He had a bottle, diapers and a thermos flask with him. Buck wondered where the hell a street kid Like Johnny Cade learned to look after a baby. It sure as hell wasn't from the scum who raised him. He didn't think he'd ever heard more words out of the kid on any subject.

"She drinks around eighteen ounces of milk in a day… Powder formula… Her names Mary… She's three weeks old… She wakes 'round every four hours… She weighs five pounds… I… I think that's small but I also think she was born a little early but I don't know for sure so maybe… Maybe say that?"

"OK Honey… Just calm down…" Hattie said gently. "I make my living by playing pretend. This will be a piece of cake, I promise."

"Hattie…" Johnny said, sounding terrified. "Please don't tell on me! Don't let them take her away from me! My folks are no good but I swear I take real good care of her! I promise I didn't mean to let her get sick!"

Buck looked in the mirror and saw that the kid was hyperventilating back there. The baby was screaming again in a high pitched wail that practically made his ears bleed. "Hattie I don't want her to end up in one of those homes like Jasper!" He said.

"Johnny!" Hattie said firmly. "Listen to me! I 'aint the baby police Honey! You're already doing a better job than my folks did with me just by talking her to a doctor! So calm down! I'm no narc! Believe me… I know what happens to black kids when the state gets ahold of them! I've been there!" She stared at him meaningfully "OK?"

"OK." He whimpered.

They pulled up outside the clinic entrance. Johnny handed Hattie some cash. "I hope it's enough!" he breathed.

"I'll make up the difference Honey. You can owe me one." She said as she got out with the baby and tottered inside on her nice, conservative court shoes. Damn! That woman cleaned up pretty nice when she was pretending to be respectable.

Johnny stared out the window like she'd just walked off with his right arm.

Buck lit a cigarette and offered Johnny a drag. "Relax! Kids get sick all the damn time." He said, breathing smoke out the window. "She'll cost you a fortune over the years you realise that right?"

Johnny said nothing.

"You know I was raised by my sister." He said. He didn't usually talk about himself but he boy was obviously panicking and wouldn't chill until he saw them walk back out. He needed a distraction.

"Yeah?" Johnny looked surprised.

"Yeah…" Buck took another drag. "Our Ma died. Our Pop took off."

"Was your sister much older than you?" Johnny asked.

"She was only eighteen… I was five. And let me tell you… My childhood was a lot harder on her than it was on me." He smiled fondly. "The hell I gave that poor girl."

"That's good to hear." Johnny said in his still childish, unbroken voice. "I can take anything as long as she ends up OK."

"I guess I oughta take that as a compliment." Buck said with a crooked grin.

"You seem OK to me." Johnny told him.

"Thanks Kid."

"I should be thankin' y'all. For doin' this… Glory! I can't drive to save my life and Steve will kill me for takin' his car! I scratched it a ton of times just gettin' out the drive!"

"You oughta learn to drive." Buck said. "Get your permit. It'll help you in a lot of ways."

"Hmm." The kid didn't look convinced. "I can't afford it."

"I'll teach ya." Buck said. "I can pay for it too… It 'ain't expensive."

"Really? You'd… You'd do that?" His mouth was hanging open. "I can't let you do that!"

"You're a friend of Dally's and a friend of Dally's is a friend of mine. So don't look so surprised and say "thank you Buck."

"Th…Thank you Buck!" Johnny looked like he was about to die of shock. After a moment he said "I… I feel pretty terrible."

"Why?"

"Everyone's bein' so nice…"

Buck would have laughed at that feelin' terrible about everyone being so nice. If it weren't so Goddam sad.

He thought, or rather had a memory, of the boy's father, drunk at the bar, brawling and violent, bitching about his wife calling the boy things you wouldn't call your worst enemy let alone a child.

Buck didn't say it to Dally. But he'd thought… He'd assumed actually, when Jasper told him about seeing Johnny on the street… He thought the bastard had sent the boy out there. He wouldn't have been remotely surprised to learn that the man had been pimping his own kid.

Then again… It was pretty clear that Johnny and this baby weren't that pasty Irish fuck's kids. His wife must've had a type.

"Always waitin' for the other shoe to drop huh kid?" He said.

"Yeah." Johnny's eyes were still fixed on the clinic door. "Nothin' good ever lasts for long."

They sat silently for a long time, then he heard the boy's breath quicken and saw Hattie exit the clinic, baby in arms.

She was smiling. Thank you God!

"Colic…" She announced smugly as she got into the car. "Bellyache. Like I thought. You'll be happy to know she's doin' just fine and I'm an excellent new mother and looking mighty good considering by the way!" She preened, arranging her hair with a laugh.

"She just has a bellyache?" Johnny asked, hugging his sister to his chest as she began to wail again.

"It happens a lot with young babies. You need something called… Well I can't pronounce it but here's the prescription." She handed it to him. "Oh… I told the doctor she was born about a month early and he said that looked right. So she is small but not cause you ain't feeding her right Honey."

They drove for a while then Buck asked. "Your mom on anything besides booze Johnny?" Buck knew it wasn't a polite question but he also knew the baby could be sicker than they thought if she was on dope.

"No… Just booze." Johnny said."On and off… She was tryin'…" He swallowed "F… For a while there she didn't drink at all… But she…" His face briefly twisted in anger "…That never lasts very long…"

"Maybe that's why the baby came early." Hattie said, looking distracted all of a sudden. "My Momma was a drunk too." She said it so quietly that Buck hardly heard her. He wanted to reach out and take her hand then.

"Did the doctor say anything else?" Johnny asked.

"Just that she looked small but healthy and to come back when it was time for her shots and also if she didn't improve with the medicine… Oh and he even left you change!" She handed him a few dollars.

"Hattie?"

"Yeah Honey?"

Johnny leaned between the front seats and kissed her on the cheek. She smiled.

Bold little bastard! Buck thought.

"You need to keep the change Hattie." Johnny said handing her back the money.

"No charge Honey… Not for this. Not any time, you hear me?"

They picked up the gripe water and drove straight back to the Curtis house. "Tell Steve Randle where his scratched up car…Is…." Buck said as they pulled up outside.

There was a cop car in the driveway, and Dally on the front porch, chain smoking, looking like he was ready to kill.

"Oh man…" Johnny muttered. "I'm deep in the shit now!" Buck felt Hattie tense up beside him at the sight of the police.

Johnny was shaking. He kissed the baby and handed her to Hattie. "Please…" He didn't finish, just got out of the car and walked up onto the porch. Buck got out too and followed him.

Dally wasn't angry, he looked devastated in fact, his eyes genuinely pained. "Johnnycake." He said with unusual gentleness in his voice. "Johnny there are some police inside who need to talk to you."

Buck squeezed Dally's arm. "Whats up?" He whispered. Dally just shook his head.

Johnny's eyes were huge and fearful as they walked into the house. Two cops were sitting on the couch. One of them, a big red faced man, stood up "Johnny Cade?"

"Y…Yes sir." He whispered. Looking like he wanted to fall through a crack in the floor.

"Son…" In an unusually paternal gesture, the cop put his hands on Johnny's shoulders. "I'm officer Bennet and this is officer Riley… We're with the homicide division."

Buck looked at Dally. He had tears in his eyes… But not for himself… He was looking at Johnny.

"Son…" The cop was being so un-cop like that even if he hadn't said which division he was from Buck would've known.

"…I'm afraid we have some bad news for you Son." Buck watched the boy's face as the cop spoke. He looked frozen for a long moment. Like he hadn't understood.

"I'm sorry to tell you that your mother's body was found today… Your father has been arrested for her murder."

Johnny just stood there staring for the longest time. Then his eyes rolled, and the cop caught him as his knees buckled.