Daryl was at a loss for words. He didn't know what he was feeling aside from the anger boiling inside of him. Rachel was limp against his side, curled up against him as much as possible with her injured leg. He knew it was bad the second she pulled off that dress and he had just stared out of the window in discomfort. It wasn't so much that he had never seen a woman in her underwear or completely naked, but none of those had been anything like Rachel. He knew that he would never forget what she looked like if he looked at her. It just felt wrong to see her in such a vulnerable state. To look at her and know how much of a struggle it was for her to open up and let down her guard, the walls she'd carefully constructed. He would remember what she looked like every time he looked at her, and know it was something he was never supposed to see in the first place. Daryl respected and valued her too much to ever betray her trust. Only when her hand hesitantly touched his cheek and she begged him to look did he snap out of it.
His eyes had left hers for just barely a second until they snapped back up. He had seen the scars on her back but seeing the marred skin of her thighs nearly broke him. It all reminded him too strongly of his own scars. Even when he didn't look for long, the image was burned into his head and he wanted to kill whoever did this to her. He had been on edge already when Shane came walking down from the house with her up in his arms, but this was something completely different.
"How?" he heard himself ask and for all it was worth, he really cared about what happened to her. He had already gone out of his way with comforting her. Had it been anybody else breaking down he would have bolted from the room. With Rachel it was different - he felt the need to protect her, even from her past. There was this weird connection he felt to her that made her easier to talk to, and he felt comfortable in her presence. It still didn't make much sense to him that he was growing less and less hesitant towards physical contact with her.
He had helped her put that dress back on when she awkwardly tried to slip back into it and after hesitating and debating whether or not to do it he had sat down next to her on the bed instead of retreating to the chair like before. Something in her eyes had compelled him to allow her to cuddle into his side while she told him what had happened to her and how she came by those scars. He had tensed up at first, the feeling of having someone, especially a woman, so close was unfamiliar and weird. But her soft breaths against his neck and her warmth seeping into him made him relax.
At least until she told him everything.
"Daryl?" her voice seemed strained, more raw even when she hadn't started crying again, even after basically reliving hell. He looked down at her, his jaws clenched tight. "Please, say something. Anything…"
He almost couldn't bear the way she looked at him and how her voice broke.

"Please, say something. Anything…" I hated how my voice broke, how I felt numb and empty after telling him everything. His jaws were tense and there was a dangerous glimmer in his eyes that I had never seen before in them, not even when we lost Merle. I wanted to flinch back from him, at the same time I didn't want to leave the safe haven of his arm around me.
"What happened afterwards? Ya report 'em?" His voice was emotionless and hard, controlled as if he was afraid to let any emotions show. I cast down my eyes and took a deep breath.
"Nothing. I… I couldn't report it… I…" I stopped talking and screwed my eyes shut at the scoff the hunter let out.
"Why couldn't ya? Could have told yer superior. Yer parents. The police. Anybody," he replied and looked down at me accusatively. I shook my head and felt like tearing up again.
"He was my superior. Telling anybody would have meant to lose everything I worked so hard for. It would have meant that I would have lost my job if anybody even believed me. My parents… I couldn't tell them. They couldn't know their daughter was too weak to prevent this from happening…"
"That's bullshit! Ya were drugged an' raped by three men. Ya couldn't have done nothin'! An' not reportin' means they walked free! What ya do instead, huh? Go on like nothin' happened?!"
I tried to push away from him, to get some space between us. I had no idea why he was getting so worked up about it. "I didn't do nothing! I requested a transfer to another company!"

His eyes went hard and he jumped up from the bed without a warning. "That's what was weak 'bout the whole thing! Ya ran, 'stead of givin' those junkless pussies what they deserved! Ya ran! Did yer brother know?"
I closed my eyes and bit my lip. I didn't want to hear this, didn't want to hear him tell me what I already knew. "Leave," I whispered. I couldn't bear the look of disappointment on his face, the pity and anger in his eyes.
"Did. He. Know?" Daryl was only inches from my face and for the first time I felt threatened by his presence, painfully aware of his arms caging me in against the headboard of the bed. I opened my mouth, but no sound would make its way out so I just nodded in defeat, unable to look into the hunter's piercing blue eyes. My mind had trouble keeping up; not a minute ago I had felt so safe cuddled into his side, and now all I wanted was for him to leave, to take back the words. Why on earth did I even tell him? Did I really expect him to care enough to understand?
"Great brother ya got there. Should've protected ya. Should've done anythin'! So that's what ya were talkin' 'bout at the C.D.C.? That he keeps blamin' ya for this happenin' to ya…" I turned my head and looked out of the window, watched our group set up camp instead of answering him. It hurt. Remembering hurt, him asking all this hurt, the look of betrayal on his face hurt. I just wished I had died out there. With Adam gone and no certainty of finding him or Sophia, it seemed like Daryl had been my last anchor to sanity these last days. And now even that was gone.
"You can go. You don't need to stay here any longer. You made your point, Daryl. I am weak and you don't have the patience for weakness…" I whispered before I even realized what I was saying.
"The fuck yer talkin' 'bout?!" I flinched at his raised voice and gasped when he suddenly grabbed my chin to make me look at him.
"Ya listen now an' ya listen good. Yer anythin' but weak! Ya got the scars to prove it. Ya made a mistake not to retaliate afterwards. Those sumbitches deserve punishment, and if I got my hands on 'em, they'd wish they were dead." Whatever made him say that, I believed him.
"Why do you care so much?" I could see the change in his face. He had put his walls back up and when he let go of my face, I knew that this was probably the last time we would share a moment like this.
"Don't matter. Got my own scars an' stories that keep hauntin' me. Get some sleep. Imma head out for yer brother an' that girl. Someone's gotta." Daryl made for the door and I quickly grabbed his hand before he could leave.
"Find me when you're back? Just… let me know if you find anything, you know." He gave my hand a short squeeze and nodded before he left the room, and myself to my own thoughts. I was still rather confused about the hunter's reactions. First he basically yelled at me for what I'd done…or hadn't done, and then he got all protective. I just couldn't keep track of his emotional state sometimes. I let out a long sigh. I couldn't even place my own emotions, not when he was close…not that I had any better control over them when we were apart, either…
I curled into the bedsheets that still faintly smelled of the hunter and tried to relax, willing my mind to shut the hell up and stop thinking about how much I liked the idea that I mattered to him, even broken as I was.

I had drifted in and out of consciousness for most of the day. My body's healing and the mental stress was finally taking its toll on me. Around midday, Hershel came in to check on me, bringing Beth with him to give me another transfusion. Not that it would have been entirely necessary, he just wanted to make sure I recovered well enough.
Despite being a man of few words, I liked the veterinarian. He was pretty clear in his opinions, same as in his orders or requests. It hadn't surprised me when he stated that as soon as Carl and I recovered enough and we found my brother and Sophia that he wanted us to leave. I could understand it, in this world it was every group for themselves, and in order to keep his family safe he couldn't take in everyone.
"I wanted to ask how long I had to stay in the house. Not that I don't appreciate the comfort and help, it's just I'd like to be out there with my people. Give your people a little more space." Hershel gave me an inquisitorial look, one that reminded me a little of a hawk that was about to strike.
"I'd say that I'd like to see you in bed for a few more days, but I got a feeling that you would only fight me on that. If you can manage on your own two legs, I will agree to let you out of the house. You should be able to take care of yourself, if what Rick tells me about you is right," he finally replied with a sigh. I gave him an innocent smile.

Some time after Hershel left and I had slept some more, I heard a soft knock on the door. I answered to just come in, and smiled when Carol slowly opened the door.
"How are you feeling, sweetie? I brought you something to eat, I wasn't sure you had anything yet." It was good to see her, though she still seemed tense and worn out.
"I'm recovering. What about you? How are you holding up with all that is going on?" I replied. With a sigh she sat down in the chair by the window after she placed the tablet with some scrambled eggs in my lap.
"I've been trying to cling to the hope that we will find my baby and your brother. Daryl went out alone again to look for them. I don't understand why he is so determined to find them, he doesn't need to do it…" she trailed off.
"It's just who he is. He is a better man than he realizes himself," I answered calmly and the older woman gave me a warm look.
"He is different around you. He is different since the moment Merle was gone and you held an arrow to his face back at the quarry." I looked at her and cocked my head.
"What do you mean, Carol? He snaps at me the same as at everyone else." I was surprised by the soft laugh coming from Carol.
"He has way more patience with you than with anybody else. He never put up for long with anybody before." I hummed and avoided looking into her eyes. I had noticed the slow change in Daryl, but I wasn't so convinced that it was just around me. "Do you think we will find them?"
I took a hold of her hand and squeezed it. "I am not giving up on them, Carol. My brother is a stupid idiot most times, but he knows how to survive in the wild. As long as Sophia is with him, she will be fine, I promise you that. I just wish I hadn't been shot. I want to be out there and look for them. Adam and I might not always agree, hell we are like fire and ice, but I would give anything to see him again. I hope Daryl has more luck out there than last time…" Now it was Carol's turn to squeeze my hand and give me a reassuring smile.
"I am glad you are here with us. We needed a strong woman around," she answered and I felt ashamed for a moment.
"I might not be that strong after all…" I whispered, to which she shook her head.
"I wish I had just an ounce of that strength you possess. I know you have an unpleasant past even if you try not to show it. Don't deny it, I see the signs in the way you talk and you tense up around Shane. I won't force you to share it with me but if you ever need someone to talk to, just know that I'm here." I nodded, taking into consideration to maybe tell her some of my story at one point. Just not today - telling Daryl everything had worn me out.
"I'll come back later. You should rest some more, sweetie." She leaned down to kiss my cheek and left me alone with my thoughts.

It was late afternoon when I couldn't bear lying in bed anymore. It was a bit of a struggle, but I finally managed to stand on my own two feet. I felt sweaty and dirty and just wanted to wash up and get back into my own clothes. I eventually made it to the door and almost landed flat on my ass when it suddenly opened.
"The fuck ya think yer doin'?!" Automatically, y Daryl had pulled me towards him to keep me from falling and looked down at me with accusation in his eyes.
"Taking a shower? And maybe fetching my own clothes from the RV…" I mumbled and looked down when he huffed.
"Ya can barely stand on yer own two feet." His voice was a little calmer now and his accent was less thick than it had been this morning. He helped me sit down on the edge of the bed before he let go of me.
"Did you find anything?" I hoped he had found some clue to where Adam and Sophia were, or at least if they were still alive.
"More or less. Found an abandoned house in the woods. Nobody there, but the closet in the kitchen looked like someone made a bed in there. Not big enough for an adult but definitely would have fit a child around Sophia's age. And someone slept in front of the closet, kept watch or somethin'. Could have missed whoever it was by only a day or so. Don't want ya to get some false hope, but it could have been yer brother and that girl." I took a moment to process what he had found and had a hard time not to scream in frustration. I leaned forward and buried my hands in my hair while staring at the floor.
"Hey… Got somethin' for ya…" I felt Daryl's hand softly on my shoulder and looked up in confusion as to why he seemed so insecure all of the sudden. It took me a moment to understand what he was holding out to me. A rose. A wild, white rose. Hesitantly I took it from him and looked at it in confusion. Daryl isn't the flower type, so what does this mean? And why is he getting all shy about bringing me a flower?
"You don't like it?" I looked at the hunter next to me and saw the almost anxious expression on his face.
"No! I mean, yes… What I mean is, it's beautiful. Thank you." His features seemed to relax a little and I suppressed a grin in order to not make him retreat back into his shell.
"Found it by the abandoned house. It's a Cherokee rose. There's a story to it but ya will probably think it's stupid." I gave him a soft smile.
"No, I want to hear it." He looked at me for another moment, as if to make sure that I was serious.
"Fine. Don't ya dare laugh at me… The story is that when American soldiers were moving Indians off their land on the Trail of Tears, the Cherokee mothers were grieving and crying so much 'cause they were losing their little ones along the way from exposure and disease and starvation. A lot of them just disappeared. So the elders, they said a prayer, asked for a sign to uplift the mothers' spirits, give them strength and hope. The next day this rose started to grow right where the mothers' tears fell. I know how it sounds, and that ya didn't lose a child. Still yer worried for yer brother. Just thought you might like it…" Daryl's voice trailed off towards the end and he looked out of the window rather than looking at me. I didn't really think about what I was doing. I gently put my hand against his cheek and made him look at me. His eyes were nervous when he looked into mine as I crossed the distance between us and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

"Thank you, Daryl. I know what you were trying to do, and I really appreciate you trying to cheer me up." When I pulled back the door to my room was thrown open and Glenn stormed in.
"Rachel, I need to talk… to… you… I'm… ah… gonna come back later…?" The Asian's eyes darted between Daryl and me and I felt myself blushing, even when nothing had really happened. Still, the confused and embarrassed look on Glenn's face made me wish the ground would just open up and swallow me whole.
"Got some squirrels to skin." I silently watched Daryl leave and felt left behind in a way. I had hoped we could talk some more. Glenn cleared his throat and scratched the back of his head while looking at anything but me.
"So are you just going to stand there or tell me what happened?" I finally asked when it became clear he wouldn't say anything until I did.
"I, uhm… You're a girl right?"
I raised my eyebrows at him and he flushed a deep crimson. "Last time I checked I was. Why? Wanna check for an extra leg?"
If possible, Glenn flushed an even deeper shade of red. He sat down in the chair and buried his face in his hands.
"For heaven's sake, Glenn! Spill it already."
He lifted his head and nodded. His mouth opened a few times and he closed it again. I was ready to throw him out when he finally talked. "Maggie and I had sex." The words left him so fast that I almost didn't catch what he was saying.
"Ahm… Good for you?" I was a little confused as to why he was telling me of his escapades and why he was so embarrassed about it. Not like I forced him to tell me or anything.
"Glenn… I know we get along well enough, but why are you telling me this? And lord help, me would you look at me?" Again his eyes wandered anywhere that wasn't where I was sitting on the bed. His cheeks turned some shade of red again.
"I… uhm… I had to tell somebody… I mean… What do I do now? What does it mean?" Watching him panic over something like that was almost comical and I knew I wasn't supposed to laugh at him at this point.
"Look, Glenn. I don't know what it means apart from the fact that the two of you got enough chemistry for her to be at least a little interested in you. I mean, she doesn't strike me as the kind of girl to have sex with just anyone given that it's the apocalypse and all. Maybe you should talk to her about what happened, rather than me. I have no problem talking about it, but you had sex with her. So maybe you should man up and talk to her about what you think. And stop fucking blushing everytime someone says sex. Jesus, what are you? Twelve?" Glenn shook his head and his expression turned more serious.
"You know that you guys are like family to me, right? And I am sorry to have bothered you with this but you are the only person that I know won't make fun of me. You're the only one I could think about talking to."
I took a hold of his hand and he looked up at me. "Anytime. But seriously, talk to Maggie. Even if it was just a one time thing, at least you will know." He nodded again and got up to leave the room.
"Hey, Glenn?" He stopped in the doorway and looked back at me. "Could you maybe ask Carol to come up here with some of my clothes?"
"Sure. Thanks, Rachel." With that he left. I let my head fall back into the pillows and a giggle escaped me. The world has gone to shit and he freaks out because he had sex.