Yarrowbreeze knew this wouldn't be easy as soon as she woke up with a tiny paw in her ear, and another smooshed against her face.
Her head shot up quickly, and she felt a little guilty satisfaction at the oomf! that escaped the small orange kit.
"You furball, that's now how you wake someone up." she chastised gently.
Sunkit looked up at her defiantly. "We want to go find our mom."
Willowkit nodded in agreement, and Yarrowbreeze's heart sank. She knew the kits were older, but hadn't thought about the possibility that they might still remember their mother after the trauma they had endured. She sighed, a pregnant pause hung in the air between the kits and her as she thought of how to even begin to explain what had happened.
"We already have big, strong warriors looking for your mom right now." She tried to soothe, but it sounded awkward and almost defensive.
"Whatsa warrior?" Willowkit asked.
"I don't care what a stupid warrior is. I want my mom! I want Bug!" Sunkit cried.
I am so unprepared for this, Yarrowbreeze lamented. But she felt for the kits. They reminded her of herself, crying for her mother as a kit as she walked through camp without even a second glance.
"I know you miss her, and I promise that we are trying to find her, but the best thing you can do right now is get strong for her, for if she returns." She comforted.
"When." Sunkit said angrily.
Yarrowbreeze let out a long breath. She hoped for the kit's sake that at any moment, the search party would return with the kit's mother. But her mind flashed back to the hungry, dark water. Nothing could survive that...
"Is this a bad time?" asked Bearstrike as he came through the heather entrance of the mending den.
"Well they-" Yarrowbreeze began.
"We want our mom back!" Shouted Sunkit indignantly.
Bearstrike's sunny demeanor fell, and he dropped the prey he was carrying to the floor.
"We're trying to find her." He promised the kits. But the two older siblings shared a knowing glance.
"She's gone, isn't she?" asked Willowkit.
Yarrowbreeze looked back at her brother, both clearly unsure of what to say or do.
"We don't know." Yarrowbreeze admitted. "But we are doing everything we can to find her."
"Did you take us from her?" Sunkit wailed. Bearstrike was taken aback, as if the kit had swiped his nose with unsheathed claws. "Whispering Brook would never take kits from their mother. There was a flood, and three of our warriors found you. They looked for your mom, but thought it would be best to get you warm and safe, away from the water."
"So you did take us from her." Sunkit sniffled. "She would have come back for us if you just left us there!"
"I still don't know what a warrior is." grumbled Willowkit.
Yarrowbreeze felt as though her head might explode. A spark of guilt flashed in her mind as she realized how Palebriar must have felt when she had kits. Is this why she left me? The guilt turned to resentment quickly. Even if these kits are stubborn, I wouldn't just abandon them because of it. And they're not even my kits!
She gathered her body out from under her, which felt strange after not having done so in the last day or so. Her shoulder and head still ached, but her paws felt okay enough to sit up on. She stepped out of the soft, warm nest to sit beside her brother. She could get a better idea of the kit's size, now that she was less out of it and not so close to them. While they were of course kits, they were much larger than she initially thought. Their small bodies didn't quite match their humorously large ears and paws yet, and she thought Willowkit might topple over just trying to carry the weight of his own head. Yarrowbreeze brought her attention back to the situation at hand and scolded herself for having such a silly thought when these kits were enduring such grief.
"A warrior is a cat who lives in one of the four cynns," Yarrowbreeze explained. "We live together in groups that make us strong. We hunt for each other and look after one another, and most importantly we follow the Warrior Code. It is what ties us to our ancestors, The Cynn of the Great Pool."
The two kits looked up at the warriors as if they had cattail fluff for brains. "We still want to go find our mom." Sunkit said dejectedly. Yarrowbreeze looked down at the kits with pity, warmth for them growing in her heart.
"I know you want to go find her, but out beyond the camp is dangerous right now. It wouldn't be right if we let you go out knowing that we would be putting you at risk." The she-cat explained.
"What if while we wait, I show you around our camp?" Bearstrike asked. "That way you don't feel so nervous about us. I promise, Whispering Brook cats aren't bad."
"Most of them, anyway." Yarrowbreeze joked, her whiskers twitching.
The kit's eyes brightened. Clearly they were up for an adventure. Yarrowbreeze blinked at Bearstrike gratefully as the three cats padded out of the mendingicine den. Dealing with the burden of orphaned kits had become a lot to bear, and she felt overwhelmed. Beetlespots had become her biggest support, teaching the kits games to play if Yarrowbreeze needed to rest, bringing them all the best picks from the fresh-kill pile, and telling the kits stories about the Great Pool when they were having difficulties falling asleep.
Yarrowbreeze loved every minute of it. But what she loved more was when the kits would fall asleep, exhausted from playing all day, and Beetlespots would care for her. She admired her as the she-cat would change the cobwebs on the wound above her eye, when she would check and recheck her shoulder and paws for pain. Just as Yarrowbreeze began to drift to sleep, thoughts of Beetlespots swirling around in her mind, the Gazer walked back into the den.
"Well, Yarrowbreeze, I have to say that it's time for you to leave my den! I'm sure you're itching to get out of here." The she-cat purred.
"What about the kits? Surely they can't sleep in the Warrior's den with me and Bearstrike, there's barely enough space in there as is." Yarrowbreeze protested.
"Oakpaw and Birchpaw have been working hard with a few other warriors to temporarily expand the Warrior's and Teller's dens. There will be ample room for everyone. I need this space for cats who fall ill, and with the way the weather is going, I'd expect many cats to be coming my way soon." Beetlespots sighed. Yarrowbreeze hadn't noticed before in her pained haze, but the Gazer looked worn out. Her fur stuck out in some places, and her eyes seemed dull with worry and exhaustion.
"Beetlespots, is there anything I can do to return the favor of helping me recover? I know I'm not the best patient at times."
Beetlespots shook her head. "Absolutely not. It is my duty as a Gazer to heal the members of my cynn."
Yarrowbreeze padded over to where Beetlespots sat, and the two cats looked out beyond the heather and into camp. "I'm worried, Yarrowbreeze." Beetlespots sighed. "Cats are going to be killed, I can feel it. I've checked my stores countless times, I've been running scenarios in my head of all the injuries I might see in a flood, but it still feels like it won't be enough." Her voice trembled. Yarrowbreeze pressed herself against the Gazer comfortingly. "I thought you said the Great Pool told us that this isn't in our paws?" She asked.
"No it isn't, but that doesn't mean that I'm okay with cats dying." Beetlespots said, exasperated. "I'm afraid it's only going to get worse from here."
Rain pelted down into the clearing, despite the ancient weeping willows that hung over camp. The two she-cats sat in silence for a moment. Yarrowbreeze could feel her pelt getting hotter the longer she sat next to Beetlespots, the cat she'd had feelings for since her apprenticeship. She lost herself in thought for a moment, thinking back to a time where Beetlespots, then Beetlepaw, had helped her get a honey locust thorn out of her paw. Yarrowpaw felt as if she'd die, the pain was so intense. She wriggled and shrieked as Beetlepaw took care to remove the thorn and put a healing poultice on it. "You'll always be safe with me around!" The Gazer apprentice had assured Yarrowpaw.
"You'll always be safe with me around." Yarrowbreeze murmured.
"What? I can't hear very well over this rain." Beetlespots asked.
Yarrowbreeze laughed. "I said I hope it stops soon."